And just like that, all of Josh's long years in therapy were undone.
Thanks, Dani E. That's one more memory I'll have to repress.
Friday, November 5, 2010
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Wreck the Halls
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What's a Wreck?
What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
- Jen
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- “Will have you laughing so hard you’ll forget to eat!”— Washington Post
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- “a fantastically gut-busting book”— NPR
- “It’s all here, each wreck a disaster of hilarity.” — BookPage.com
- “Hysterically funny!”— Epinions.com
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- “Yates’ sharp humor makes the funny even funnier.” — The Dallas Morning News
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November
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- Teaming With Wreckage
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75 comments | Post a Comment
*shudder* UGH
Oh for pity's sake! That's the first time one of these posts had made me want to hurl! I have a really strong stomach, but that is just gross!
Is that a glove?
So. Very. Wrong.
And yet, so hilarious. I'm just glad it's not my cake.
No Comments at 3:53. Everyone is stunned into silence!
Oh, wow, I am speechless
Staci
Is that a glove? Ewww.
HOLY COW. That is about 800 kinds of creepy. As if the amputated hand isn't bad enough, they had to make it all broken finger-wiggly? Creepy. I think I need another shower today.
Those fingers look like they were cut off and (badly) reattached with superglue!
(Another Jen)
what does that even mean? Creepy thing hand coming at 'cha...
*gagging*
OMiGad! I just realized that hand is a latex glove filled with person colored icing.
OMG! A dismembered hand cake? Gross!!!! The 'tickle' tickle' just adds to the macabre ghastliness of it all.
Someone has a 'Thing' for you.
I cannot think of any reason, excuse, or situation in which this cake would be appropriate for a 30 year old man. O____O;
WV: halubet. They must've just made it for the halubet.
Do we know where that hand has been??? *tickle tickle*
Oh I'm scared! Now I need therapy!
o.O oh lordy.
What alien did that hand come from?
That is just so off-putting.
WV sednesse It is with great sednesse that I have to reject this cake.
That hand looks like a rubber glove filled with frosting or something, and then run over with a pizza cutter.
Or possbily stuck in a garbage disposal.
Yummy!
Oooh a two-fer!
Creepy. Reminds me of the campfire ghost stories of the severed hand of the escaped psycho from the institution looking for the rest of it's body.
wv: nuantsaf: Nuantsaf from the CLAW! Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha!
I'd still like a wall calendar please!
EEEUUUUWWWWW! Diana N
And the nightmares began all over again...
A severed hand makes ANY birthday cake complete, doesn't it?
Poor Joshua...
OMG that's creepy
Quite simply....disturbing. ;)
I cannot stop laughing
Hey. They spelled everything right! The design is carried out reasonably well, too. It's just deeply disturbing. But they spelled everything right! And the punctuation is unambiguous! It would be a win, but for the utter creepiness.
I cannot stop laughing
The caption had me laughing so hard. Funniest yet. So Gary Larson-esque. :D
All I have to say is.... "WOW."
Question...Is that the palm of the hand or the back?
Either way...((((shudder))))
The phrase "tickle tickle" makes this cake less "decapitated hand" and more "creepy memories"....and what kind of 30 year old wants a creepy hand cake???
Weird ... that's really not a strong enough word. Creepy, disturbing, bizarre, strange ... weird. Poor Josh.
OMG!! Who crushed poor Joshua's fingers!?!?! And on his birthday!! Oh dear, Joshua will never be able to paint again!!
:-)
YIKES! Run!
not on his birtholay!...Sad
3 words for you:
dis-tur-BING! :p
Scary! You know I was trying to figure out why the fingers were bent and folded so oddly - could that be a rubber glove filled with frosting???
*blink blink*
That is seriously terrifying. Why?!?! Why would someone order this?!
Am I seeing it wrong, or is actually a plastic glove filled and shaped?!?!
AUGH!
Creepy!
Makes me think of Road Kill.
My question is: what is the glove filled with? I vote for pureed ham salad or salmon mousse.
Huh. Wonder if it's red velvet inside.
Because nothing says "We love and appreciate you on your 30th birthday" like a rubber glove filled with goo on top of a cake...
I fear this sounds vulgar, but can it be more vulgar than that cake?
Is there somewhere that prostate examinations are compulsory at the age of 30? That was the implication that came to my mind. Otherwise there ought to be one heck of a personal inside joke to go along with it.
Kay
i love creativity when it comes to cakes but this one is just creepy.
Was that hand caught in a door or something?!?!
Some things are wrong all day long.
so creepy...
I definitely need a monitor with an 'unsee' button that would reverse the flow of information from computer to visual cortex. Then I could drop the computer into an active volcano and call it a day.
It is definitely past Halloween (I double-checked), so What The Luck?
It is a glove -- the fingers were squished in (eww) to make it fit on the cake. I was definitely wondering about the proportions until that clicked.
Surely, any wreckerator can freehand (Har!) a hand that looks better than that hand. Ok, probably not (he said, thinking of 'Your Day Has Arrived'). Please tell me the hand was removed before serving... (And everyone within 10 miles said, "Let's give Joshua a hand!")
Then we get into the whole 'tickle tickle' thing and Joshua's 30th (not 3rd) freaking birthday... I am SO not going anyplace on that itinerary.
I wonder if that memory-erasing technology from 'Total Recall' has stopped being science fiction yet. If not, I think I'll go invent it.
OH NOES! THEY KILLED THING AND MOUNTED HIM ON A CAKE!
Nothing says "Happy 30th" like a disembodied hand with broken fingers.
I just blew up the image -- the presence of air pockets at the fingertips indicates the glove is still on.
Note the 'dig marks' in the white frosting -- that is some seriously grotesque attention to detail. At least I hope that's all it is...
Doesn't it just figure that this specimen would be correctly spelled and have readable writing.
We've all heard of Deep Blue (and distant offspring Deep Thought), right? This is Deep Creep. Only it Does Not Compute.
wv: afenjus.
and was the palm supposed to look a little .....well, hairy?
Soooo, did the wreckerator just add the "hand" as a bonus? If not, I am wondering what the wreckee could possibly have said during the ordering conversation that would result in this!
Wreckee: "Can you make an Elmo cake?"
Wreckerator: "We don't have an Elmo cake."
Wreckee: "Could you just free-hand an Elmo? See, my brother is very ticklish and he laughs just like Elmo, so we nicknamed him Tickle-Me-Elmo and I thought it would be funny."
Wreckerator: "Oh! I have just the Thing!"
Andrea
If I saw that coming at me, I'd run screaming.
*Runs away screaming then hides and is paranoid for remainder of day.*
Ewww.... that is just so wrong!
WTF?? What kind of occasion called for that?
plus 7 for creativity
plus 8 for spelling & punctuation
negative trillion for making the icing gods angry
-Barbara Anne
wv: (I am NOT kidding) sprat
My dinner went sprat when I hurled after realizing everyone was right - that is a glove.
(have they ever heard of latex allergies?? I don't think I considered that a food allergy before now.)
I think I need therapy after this.
Just today, my son asked me how "Thing" on the Addams Family managed to crawl up walls and do all that 'other stuff'.
Not sure I want to know. Right up there with not wanting to know how they did this.
I WAS going to have dessert tonight... guess not.
~~Di
*singing* ... creepy and they're kooky, mysterious and spooky, they're altogeher ooky ...
the Addams Family *snap*snap* (although I don't recall a Cousin Joshua)
WV: State -- no kidding. Just watching voting results *shudder* quite a few things gonna be falling to the budget ax
I always enjoy reading your blog. I included you in my "favorite blogs" post today. You can check out the posting at http://juliakoponick.blogspot.com/2010/11/few-favorite-blogs.html
Thanks for making me laugh on a daily basis! Even when life looks bleak, I can find a laugh here!
Julia
So. Wrong.
WV: ALZAT...as in "Alzat cake reminds me of is my creepy Uncle who used to 'accidentally' tickle me places where no uncle should"
No &%#@!
I love it when disembodied hands with possibly broken fingers tickle me. It's the highlight of my birthday!
Great.. now they give out free hands on their cake wrecks. Would love to know where this is so I can run far from the place lol.
Still... I cannot stop laughing. It's just too much!
Could that be one of those battery-powered toy crawling hands? Wouldn't it be great to see it working?
O.M.G.
I don't know what else to say to that.
*involuntary shudder*
If it is a glove, what the hell is it filled with? Scratch that--I don't want to know.
that hand is too disgusting...Oh how I hope I'm never featured on this site!!
Good. Lord.
Reminds me of this movie that scared the wits out of my older brother in the early 1970s: The Crawling Hand (1963)! An astronaut's dismembered hand comes back to earth, possessed by an alien, and goes on a murderous rampage in a small town! Guess it didn't like the local bakery?
This is a "What the heck!?!?" kind of moment. Thinking back to middle school, when perverts said this to make you shudder in disgust. It makes me want to cry in scared digusted-ness, "Why? Why? WHY!?" *Shudder* :P
-B