Friday, June 18, 2010

Let's Just Stick with "Happy Falker Satherhood"

Friday, June 18, 2010

We here at Cake Wrecks would like to wish all of you dads out there the happiest of Father's Days this weekend.

Just as soon as we figure out how.

Hm. Not quite right...


No...


"Phathes"? Seriously?

Definitely no...


Aaaand we give up.


Of course, getting the inscription right is only half the battle:

This design works best if dad has never heard of "sarcasm."

(Also, you've got to love the not-so-subtle "Making of Me" "rug" there. Way to acknowledge the paternal contribution, Wreckerators!)


Riiiiight.

Now, don't get me wrong: I'm sure there would be buzzing around that load of...hive. It just wouldn't necessarily be by bees.

[brightening] Hey, you think those are vuvuzela horns?



Now, kids, when ordering your Daddy a cake, try to emphasize his positive qualities.

You know, like having a butt the size of Texas.

(Hey, at least they didn't call him "Super Terrific Dad." Heh.)


Carrie G., Erin H., Brady M., Ro W., Vangie B., Elisabeth K., & Katie, you've made your dads proud today. Unless, of course, you've never managed to measure up to his expectations, and he just doesn't understand you. In that case, this probably hasn't made much difference either way.
Taylor said...

The last one looks like a deflated whoopie cushion. And his face looks inside-out.

dinnersanddreams.net said...

Your cakes are amazing and different every time. Great job!

megrat7 said...

OMG Mickey has been decapitated!!!! Oh.... those are just rend and black Fathday balloons you say?! Alright then >_<

Mrs B. said...

Anyone else notice that the "World's Greatest Dad" is also apparently celebrating a birthday?!

LMAO

Lady of the loch said...

Oh my this made me snort with laughter. My hubby just walked past and said. What are you looking at? It's cake wrecks right?
He knows me so well. How can people fail to spell such basic words correctly?

Fluffy Cow said...

Poor Dads...
Why are there eyes on the second one... I seriously hope I am missing something.

Anonymous said...

Love the way the second cake has crossed eyes. Maybe that's the way you're suppose to read it.

Sharon's Edible Art

Anonymous said...

this is why I am not making him a cake

Shanti said...

...black balloons? Really?!

Word verification: ststpr, which I initially translated into "stepsister". Appropriate for the family-themed post, yes?

Isolder74 said...

Great, first poo bees now a poo hive. I think someone might have a grudge against bees or something.

Well at least the bees look ok on that one.

I think it's time we make a speller's dictionary, you know what typists used before spell checker, standard equipment for all bakeries.

Bearess said...

Super *Dad*? Looks like Dad enjoys wearing a muumuu and doing up his hair. I'm confused.

Miranda said...

I can imagine what my dad's face would look like if I gave him one of those.

Luckily, I went to thinkgeek and ordered him a periodic table shower curtain instead. XD Don't laugh; he's a man of science.

Patrice said...

My brother says the chocolate one with the squish lettering looks like "Happy thursday". Good to know we celebrate the important things in life.
-Patrice

Anonymous said...

CW#4: Blow-out on the star border. Get the air out of your piping bag, people. (sigh)

Beth said...

The second one is obviously the British spelling of "father"....like "theatre"........

peaches1111_00 said...

At first I didn't get the "Making of Me" joke. Then I REALLY looked at the rug...ooooohhhhh. I GET IT. You made a funny! AND it's Disney related. I heart you. <3

The Boob Nazi said...

Maybe the second one is the British spelling?

Stella said...

you got me at the load of hive...

Onyx said...

Don't be so hard on the second one. They're probably just British.

"Now make sure you write 'Happy Fathre's Day' right in the centre. It will be ready on time, won't it? We're going to the theatre after dinner and we don't want to be late!"

The Boob Nazi said...

Someone already took my joke. Well, now I'm embarrassed.

Gary said...

On "Happy Fathday Day," I like the coffee beans with umbilical cords. Can I have some of whatever the baker was drinking/smoking/sniffing when he/she came up with that?

Mary Connealy said...

I got very close to the end of the day yesterday and realized I hadn't stopped in at Cake Wrecks.

The feeling of some fun left in a long old day was really sort of an electric shock of excitement.


No, I have no life. Why do you ask???

Sandy C said...

Ok, cake 5- what is that yellow blob and the little brown things around the edge???

The guy's on his couch watching tv while rats are eating the big lump of cheeze whiz in the middle of his living room floor... wow...

Sandy C/gscout73

DB loves her Mac said...

@Shanti - Those balloons are kind of football-shaped, although I've never seen a black football before. Maybe they're trying for a team colors reference? And failing…

WV: crosest, as in "Those are the crosest eyes I've ever seen" or as in "That rittle cake is the crosest thing to disaster the Father's Day horiday could have."

Jenni @ Project Cookie 365 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kimuracarter said...

"NO CAPES!"

Anonymous said...

I love the sperm balloons on the first cake!!!

jengersnap said...

Nothing says "I love you, man!" like black balloons and lots of shiney brown icing. Ewww.

Esty said...

STD! LOL

Anonymous said...

Yes, the Superdad IS a rear view, but what you see is his long, flowing red cape.

Or a butt the size of Texas.

WV = nonshini "I use powder to keep my nose nonshini."

Normie in Gainesville, FL

Anonymous said...

It's Triangle Man! :)

Anonymous said...

I thought the first one had little boxing gloves on it, but 3 gloves? No, that didn't make sense. How about balloons? OK, scary, ugly black balloons. But the best was Happy Fathday Day. I love it!

The Prettiest said...

I love the (probably unintentional) pun in the last one. Too bad they missed the accent.

meesh said...

I saw the first cake and right away I thought, "Hey! Hidden Mickey!" Just another sign that I need to get to Disneyland again...soon. ;)

Anonymous said...

I just want to know why there are Red-Tailed Death Sperms on cake number 1!
Annie S.

inspiredpointsofview said...

"I love the sperm balloons on the first cake!!!"

Ha! I doubt they would be celebrating Father's Day if his sperm looked like that!

Suzanne said...

The cake with the cute little buzzy bees would have bees just fine without that poo hive. When will people learn to quit while ahead?

Melanie said...

Maybe cake number two is from Bret Favre's kids. You know, he kind of has that weird pronounce the r in the wrong place going on.

Anonymous said...

First cake: Balloons for Ozzy Osbourne from Sharon and the kids or a subtle hint that you suspect your sibling may be the spawn of Satan and Dad had something to do w/ that?

Fanboy Wife said...

I think at least one cake should say, “Happy Phathers Day – Thanks for Teaching me how to Spell!”

Sami said...

You know, I was looking at these kinda sadly. My dad is a deadbeat and we don't really have contact with him, so around Father's Day I get kind of sad. Then I saw the world's best dad cake, and I couldn't help but laugh because I thought that would be the perfect cake for him. Thanks for cheering me up, Jen :)

JW said...

I think the sperm on the first cake is a really nice touch. :)

ladycrim said...

Are those black balloons or irritated sperm on the first cake?

Sue KuKu said...

I think the last one should say "Super Sized Dad"!

The colors on the dad ARE the colors of McDonalds . . .

jo said...

Why does father's day = black balloons?? or maybe it's birthday/father's day combo cake? poor dad. "no respect!" either that or he has really sick sperm and those aren't really balloons.

googly eyes? on a cake? why? does he like comedy? is he a drunk? is he a clown?

#3: ok, SOMEBODY just took an ESL class and learned that PH makes a F sound. Spelling father must have really stumped them.

#4: tip to wreckerator: inscribe the cake AFTER putting on the border! The F on Fathus day is completely covered! (do you supposed someone, orderer or wreckerator, had a NY accent?)

#5: I was at a loss for that really plush scrambled eggs "rug." hairy bean bag? a sun? Dad you light up my life? you are my sunshine? (but why is the sun on the floor?)

but then, after a second--I realized what you meant "making of me" rug...ROFL *wipes eyes* too funny! those "fringes" took on a whole new life for me!

last one: poop or hot dogs. the hive is upside down otherwise. the bees are obviously lost. (something else would be buzzing! lol)

Layne said...

I think the "Fathre" must be a British spelling!

And the World's Greatest Dad looks like a stomach!

Anonymous said...

Completely unrelated to today's post, I was just wondering:
Did anyone else feel like putting icing on their bacon this morning?

Anonymous said...

Hmm. I don't seem to be able to leave a comment. I keep being told "service unavailable". Of course if it works this time this comment will look really stupid!

jo said...

ooh, forgot about the cookie. for a second, I thought mop haired Dad was wearing an orange garbage back. thanks for pointing out that it's supposed to be a cape. a really lame, scallop edged cape. and he has really long arms, spreading it out. (one's longer than the other)

Also, if that hideous yellow is supposed to be "skin color" -- does it disturb anyone else that it looks like Dad is nekkid under that cape???

hope he's not prowling a playground anywhere...

Anonymous said...

The Fathre's Day one is for dads who like theatre.

sendingtheclowns said...

@Mary Connealy:

Hey, I have no life, either, but who needs a life when we have Cake Wrecks??
~~~~~~~~~
That eyeball cake could be for a Marine; it has that "cadet blue" thing going on. Pretty yickish color for a cake, though, especially with ketchup and mustard all over it as well. Nearly as appetizing as a decorated dirty ashtray.
Happy athus Day cake looks darn yummy, I think. Chocolate!!!!
Good thing there's no spell check app. in one's stomach, or some of these would have to be thrown up.
Why is that beehive cake box so big??? It looks like something you'd carry an unwanted litter of kittens in on the way to the animal shelter...
Hmmmmm...maybe that's not really a beehive at all...

=^!.!^=

Anonymous said...

Here in (cross eyed?) Britain we have just have fathers just like you, not fathres or fathurs or even phathurs.

What on earth is that enormous blobby yellow circular thing in the middle of the 'greatest dad' cake - is it the portal to another dimension perhaps one inhabited by bottom-heavy super dads?

A poo beehive today for yesterday's poo bees to live in - nice.

(Actually I wouldn't mind what the cake looked like if I could just have my wonderful, kind, gentle, clever, talented, witty late father back.)

JM said...

Is it just me or does Super Dad kind of look like a volcano with appendages?

ladyrazorsharp said...

The, uh, red and black 'swimmers' are actually rather appropriate.

OH those are BALLOONS. =P

The rest of these are only something a father would love. I think we once gave my dad a cake with pink writing on it once and he didn't say a word except "Awww, thanks!" To the wreckorator's credit we asked the bakery to add the 'happy father's day' to a ready-to-go cake but I guess the decorator didn't see what bag she grabbed...

Anonymous said...

does making of me rug = sperm attacking an egg? yikes! abstract cake "art"

jo said...

um, garbage "bag" not "back" (I CANNOT spell today!)

though nekkid was an intentional misspelling of naked.

sorry. i was really distracted by the meaning of life on the couch cake.

Barb said...

Happy Fathre's Day Brett Farvre!

The Dream Police Person said...

How wonderful! :D I actually thought the last one was a refinished mothers day cake on sale and the first one Mickey Mouse's head. Very nice! However, I think the bees on the "bee hive" cake looked pretty good... What? They're plastic? (I'm actually not sure about that)... Oh, never mind then.

Donna Oswald said...

I actually thought the last super dad cake was an homage to dad who's a chemist. Looks like an erlenmeyer flask to me (although now I see the "cape" resemblance

WV Spopr as in super pop rules!

Donna

evolutionofagardener said...

It never ceases to amuse me to hear my three year old exclaim, "Hey! There's poop on that cake!" I never heard that until I subscribed to Cake Wrecks.

caneprincess046 said...

The balloon cake almost looks like cartoon sperm. Celebrating dad's contribution I guess?!?!?!

lisa said...

I think that one that says "Phather Day" was going for funny...you know how phat=fat but the cool way...so you are a cool dad?

MissNay said...

I thought those balloons were mickey mouse and then I just got sad.

Nonna Beach said...

The first one is all too often true...some men are merely sperm donors and then disappear except for an occasional pack of diapers or bucket of baby wipes !

DonnaB. said...

I'm totally picking up some chunky yellow yarn and crocheting a "Making of Me" rug.

Decadent Housewife said...

Nothing like a bee tornado.

Casey said...

Ummm am I the only one to notice that the first cake has sperm on it?? That is what makes a father after all.

Anonymous said...

Wow. On that last one, either poppa decided to become a cross-dresser, or poppa really got *back*.

Janet said...

Oh Lord, the COLORS on the Phathes Day cake! And I've never seen such dry looking icing. Yuck! It kind of looks like they pushed fondant through the PlayDoh Spaghetti Factory extruder.

I'm glad to see from the comments I wasn't the only one who needed a moment to get the "Making of Me" rug.

The bees only look good because they're manufactured plop-ons made of compressed sugar.

Naomi said...

Ba ha ha ha ha! The beehive cake looks like someone pooped on it!

Arlene said...

Cause nothing tells dad you love him like a poop pile surrounded by killer bees lol. As for the other cakes..oh boy. That birthday cake scares me worse than playing Resident Evil in the dark.. creepy. I pity anyone getting that cake for the birthday with all that grey and ugh..

Wolvie Girl said...

I thought the last one was a girl in a really ugly flouncy dress at first, then I realised that he (is it a he? is it a bird? is it a plane?) is wearing a cape. Lovely lipstick though. He/she/it looks rather like Leela from Futurama to me.

@kimuracarter - Now we know the real reason why Edna doesn't like capes. It's not because you might get sucked into a jet engine, but because they make your bum look big :D

VĂ©dis said...

It's hard to decide what the fathday day cake is,but i'm sticking with weirdly colored sperm ;)

Victoria said...

Sooo, anyone here know anyone who has a giant popcorn pile with poo on it infront of their sofa? Anyone?

Anna said...

About those "eyes", are you sure they aren't ghosts singing with their eyes closed?

Tricia L said...

Are we really sure those black things on the first cake are balloons? They look more like snails leaving their slimy trail behind.

And thanks, people. Although I couldn't overlook the poohive, I did think the wreckerator made lovely bees. Then you went and said they were stickons. Thanks, just thanks.

(And for anyone who hasn't seen the Happy Falker Satherhood post, you MUST.)

throwingames said...

What the heck it that yellow thing in front of dad on the couch?

"You know, like having a butt the size of Texas." ...and also three cheeks.

Christie said...

I see a hidden Mickey!

WV: deloo - The bees went to deloo on the cake.

Mandy9r said...

Is it just me, but do the balloons on that first cake look like mickey mouse bleeding from his mouth and ears? Like he's got some kind of contagious horror movie disease that ends in zombies taking over the world?

Mags said...

Yikes!!! That "coffee table" is an egg with sperm attacking it, right?!! WHO does these cakes and thinks that "seed" of an idea that germinates in their minds is a good thing?!!!!
:) Mags

Anonymous said...

This seems like the time and place to ask something that bugs me every year: is it "Father's Day", "Fathers' Day" or "Fathers Day"?

Of course, nothing tops Happy Falker Sather's Day. Too bad my husband doesn't like cake. I would so order that one for him.

Liz said...

my daughter saw the bee cake and said look its a tornado cake:)

Flumpme said...

Yh. we just go with Father over here guys, even in Scotland.

I kinda figured the blue cake grew it's own et=yes, since they seem to be looking at the inscription in a 'holy sh** what is THAT?' kinda way.

maybe you should order a cake with 'Hapy Dady Day' on, cos it's easier to spell.

Anonymous said...

The sperm balloons on the first one are like a reminder, "Remember Dad? This is how you got here in the first place."

introducingyael said...

The Making of Me!!!
RIP, Wonders of Life. :(

Melanie said...

My husband likes it because I truly can't remember the name of those horns so I just call them Bazinga horns.

Scarlett Robyn said...

Ummm....those squiggly things that you call balloons sure look suspiciously like sperms.....

~Nikki~ said...

OMG you said it! The one with the bees looks like a huge pile of... you know what! Funny!

check out my blog: nikkiscakery.blogspot.com

Kate said...

My husband liked the "inverted turd loaf." Snort!!

LeedleFishy said...

We celebrated Father's Day at my parent's house, there was cake, beer, and BBQ, and it was a success enjoyed by all. But then, right as we were getting ready to walk out the door to go home, my husband speaks up and wishes my dad a "Happy Falker Satherhood!" I was both impressed by him, and so sad that I'd completely forgotten to make them a Falker Satherhood cake. : ( Oh well... next year!

Julie said...

My daughter just called the "balloons" in the top photo "Death Sperm!" Yup, pretty much sums it up.

Anonymous said...

These are funny, but some of them I really can't believe are professional cakes...the writing on some shows it's obvious that it's store-bought, but others have worse "cake handwriting" than mine...and that's really bad! How are you sure that they're legitimate?

Eve said...

I think the last one looks like dad is a bulb of garlic - anyone else see the resemblance?

Madeline said...

I think the last one is supposed to have a cape that says SD for Super Dad.