Monday, March 15, 2010

I'm Looking Over My Wrecked Up Clover

Monday, March 15, 2010

Saint Patrick's day is this week, and to celebrate, Wreckerators are clearly getting into the Irish spirit. (And by "spirit," I mean "Guinness.")


Shamrock Clover Reference Photo:


(Because by the end of this post, you'll have no IDEA what one looks like.)


First up, "Oscar Lends a Hand:"

Ouch.


"Wasted Windmills:"

The care.
The precision.
The...triangle thingies.



"What Target considers print-worthy:"

I don't usually call out specific bakery chains, but c'mon, Target. Really?

[Seth: Really?
]
[Amy: Really! Really?]
[Seth: I mean, Reeeeally.]



"Something Vaguely Obscene on Something Vaguely Hat-Like:"

Never mind, Target. All is forgiven.


"The Right Hook:"

Why do they always curve to the right?

"The Sham...WOW":

You following this, camera guy?

Yeah, me neither.



"The Thing I'm Told is a Shamrock But I'm Not Buying It:"

And from the looks of things, neither is anyone else.


Maia G., Meg K., Lori B., Carrie M., Misty B., Trisha D., & Alex, I want you to know that my little Guinness joke does NOT mean I think Irish people are all alcoholics, and I would hate to have any of you lovely Irish readers think that. Especially considering your hair-trigger tempers and all.

- Related Wreckage: Rockin' Shams

UPDATE:
Today I learned that there is a difference between clovers and shamrocks. As I understand it from your comments, clovers can have either 3 or 4 leaves, but shamrocks can only have three Epcots. [nodding seriously] Good to know, good to know.
Elizabeth said...

Yikes! They're not even trying. And there's no way that last one is ANYTHING!

http://agirlinherkitchen.blogspot.com/

Cottage Dreamers said...

Ha ha! Looks like broccoli has finally got a following as the new St Pat day symbol! Go Broccoli!

hartman said...

My daughter made me stop at the "hat" one and said, "Mom, I want that one. A hat for my birthday is so cool. I want that cake!" So, I guess you have to be 4 to appreciate fine cake art.

Suzi said...

Only one thing, Jen - Shamrocks have three leaves. Your example is a fine four-leaf clover, but it's no shamrock either.

It's why St. Patrick used it as a symbol for the holy Trinity: the leaves stood for the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Really. (I always liked the term Holy Ghost. Sounded much spookier than spirit.) That is a lot of useless information for someone who's not even Catholic!

And the sham-wows are clearly meant for another holiday, Siddown and Eat Yer Broccoli day, celebrated on...uh...March 17th.

momevers said...

A shamrock has three sections, not four. It represents the Trinity.

Rebecca's Mom said...

Some of those "shamrocks" look more like broccoli.

Cynthia D said...

That last line had me the closest I've ever been to needing a squeejee for my laptop. Thanks for the Top' o' the mornin' smile.

Miranda said...

Holy crap. Of all the easiest possible designs and they still bork it!

The Shitty Astrologer said...

Those get an "E" for effort. I think the last one is supposed to be either a hybrid shamrock, or a disease-riddled one...you decide.

Richard said...

Oh, come on. What's wrong with Target encouraging all the kids who read their catalog to eat more broccoli?

ErinQ said...

Great, funny post as always. But you may want to re-think your shamrock reference photo. What you've depicted is a four-leaf clover. Any good church-going child can tell you that St. Patrick used the Shamrock to illustrate the Holy Trinity- three parts of one being. Shamrocks only have three leaves. Just sayin'...'cause you are the only one that gets to be a smarty pants.
-Erin

Kathleen said...

*snort* *cough* *choke* bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

(the sounds I made as I snorted my coffee before bursting into laughter at the Right Hook)

WV: axese. I think all these cakes should be axese to death.

Anonymous said...

Most of these look like weird mutant fungus under the microscope.

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who thinks the right hook wreck is more obscene than the "hat"?

Anonymous said...

aren't shamrocks and four leaf clovers entirely different things?

these are awesomely scary <3

Jess said...

I was in my local Zehrs yesterday and deeply regretted that I didnt' have a camera. Apparently, the Zehrs bakery was under the impression that St. Patties Day was about to happen. Oops.

Anonymous said...

Hi. Your reference photo isn't a shamrock. It is a four leaf clover. Shamrocks only have 3 leaves. St Pat taught the Irish about the Holy Trinity by using a shamrock.

Stacie said...

"When are they going to STOP putting 'windmill' in Pictionary??"...The Community, pretty funny, never mind.

In what world is there red in a shamrock? Really, because I am very curious.

Bek said...

That last one is just unacceptable - Guinness or not!

Unknown said...

REALLY? Wow! Now, honestly...how can ANYONE think that last cake is a shamrock in any form? That person should be fired. Seriously! Where's Donald Trump when you need him?

gairid said...

Amazing...'stems' on some of these shamrocks.

I I might make one tiny observation? A shamrock has three leaves; your reference photo is a four-leaf clover (considered lucky because there are a lot fewer of them than the three leaf ones). You often see both as symbols for St. Patrick's Day now, but it was the three leafed shamrock that St. Patrick used to teach the idea of the Holy Trinity being three persons in one God when he went to Ireland.

So endeth the lesson!

Val
CT

The Gravekeeper said...

Wow...that fifth one just looks obscene. You sure that's a shamrock?

I also happen to think that last one was never meant to be a shamrock; it's clearly a used lollipop that fell in the trash.

roballen said...

I THINK they may have been trying to incorporate the colors of Ireland's flag into the last one (green, white, orange). Still - there's no excuse for that kind of wreckage!

Anonymous said...

I think the last one supposed to be a Irish flag colored sharock. Got that?

Just horrible. Horrible.

Laura said...

One other nitpick... although I agree that those cookies are, indeed, wreckariffic, I have, in my possession, a beautiful Shamrock plant, and each leaflet is a perfect triangle. There are, however, only three leaflets to each stem.

So I give that wreckarator points for tryin'. The others, though? coffee-snortin' time. Honestly!

Shanti said...

Some of these cakes - and you know which ones I mean! - remind me of a "classic" pickup line: "Do you have any Irish in you? Do you want any?"

As for the rest...I drew better shamrocks on my Cousin Jack cookies last year. Yeesh.

Word verification: phailyc. Offered without comment.

Anonymous said...

I saw that Target ad and immediately thought cake wreck! It's pretty bad! :)

jo said...

If only my kids were here to help me comment. btw, judging by these, I doubt the spirit of choice was Guinness. maybe some sort of Irish whiskey...

1) is that a triple eared elephant? that stalk looks like a trunk. maybe he's wearing a fancy collar.

2) those windmills are sad.

3) nvm...

4) is that the Green Giant's hat with broccoli on it showing his support for veggies?

5) I don't know WHAT that is but the stalk end looks very suspicious...

6) again with the broccoli? are we celebrating vegetarian day?

7) I don't know WHAT that is. ice cream scoop with a cherry on a green stick? sports equipment? no clue...it's NOT a shamrock

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure that last one is a SanwichPop.

joliman

dharmamama said...

This whole post was hilarious. Thanks for help getting through Monday!

WV: sycgrup - All us people who enjoy these wrecks, we're a sycgrup

AE said...

Thank God you included the Target ad picture! I saw that and immediately thought of the site. I'm surprised they allowed such a wrecky CCC (ptooie) begging to be mocked.

Stacie - loved the callback to Community. "Stop drawing circles around it!"

Jules AF said...

hahaha I think the first is my favorite.

Barb said...

Well, I'm glad to see that Seth and "Amy" are still together and going strong!!! Guess I better make sure to tell Seth!!! LOL!!

Karen said...

Was going to say basically the same as Suzi!

Anonymous said...

Oh lay off about the shamrock/four-leaf clover, guys. Either way, it's a clover, and it still proves that these cake "designers" dropped out of art in the fourth grade.

Anonymous said...

HEY YOUR SHAMROCK IS ACTUALLY A FOUR LEAFED CL--

Oh never mind, beaten to it.

Suzie said...

That's funny. I saw the Target ad and instantly thought.... "Really? I mean Really? Cakewrecks will love this one!" and promptly got distracted by Ace of Cakes. :)

Anonymous said...

Uhm.... Why does the third to last one have a "tip" on the stem??

Karasu said...

*worried that I probably just alarmed my neighbours by howling [like a bean sidhe! XP] with laughter* Whew... *wiping tears from my eyes*

To respond to the comments citing the story about St. Patrick and the shamrock. I was raised Catholic, so I grew up hearing that as well. However, the ancient Celts already had the concept of triple deities - both Triple Gods and Triple Goddesses - way before St. Patrick came along. If you look at ancient Irish art, there are many uses of three images interconnected, such as the triquetra and the triskelion [like the spiral triskelions which can be found at Newgrange.]

The story about St. Patrick is most likely another example of the common practice of the Catholic Church back in those days to take local customs and ascribe Christian meanings to them to make it easier to convert the people. [To be clear, I'm just stating that objectively as a matter of historical fact. I'm not passing judgment here.]

Lady said...

Actually...

(wait for it)

(wait for iiiiiit)

It's Epcot.

Couldn't resist!

Anonymous said...

a 4 leaf clover is a rare mutation of a 3 leaf 4 leaf is still a shamrock just rarer
wv lessedic some of the wrecks need lessedic
d

Love and Puppies, Christy said...

I recieved my first cake wreck this weekend! It was my birthday and I had requested cupcakes (I actually heart CCC's because of the mass amount of icing that is involved). Anyway, my husband (the sweet sweet man that he is) picked up a CCC for me that was intended to say, "Happy Birthday Chrisy"...instead, it said "Wappy Birfday Christy". Apparently they think my husband has a speech impediment.

Rachel Moss said...

Love the Weekend Update reference!

Anonymous said...

I think the first cake is actually a green hand-turkey. As for the rest, er, .

Andygirl said...

first of all: WOW! who knew shamrocks were so hard to make? and REALLY, Target? I'm ashamed of you.

secondly: I'm Irish. and I love my Guinness. and we're all alcoholics. and we're okay with that.

Miradwyn said...

All the complaints about 3-4 leaf clovers and yet the first one has 6! Maybe it's a moldy turkey Thanksgiving cake? The last one looks like a poisonous mushroom laying on its side.

Anne said...

"Hey Emily, come and look at this!"

"What?"

"Check out these cakes!"

"Hmm, interesting.. um.. broccoli."

"It's not broccoli. It's a shamrock."

"Oh."


Nice Shamrocks!

On a side note, Happy Birthday to Me!!!

Gary said...

Wow, I wonder what these bakers would come up with if you asked them for a cross or a circle? Never mind, with Easter coming up, we'll probably find out.

I do feel obligated to point out, though, that your reference picture of a shamrock is actually a four leafed clover. A proper shamrock has three Epcots.

RKC said...

The last one looks like a daffodil for St. David's Day! It was on the 1st of March, so maybe that's what they were aiming at? Still a pretty poor daff though...

Giana said...

Wow....don't these places train people?

BTW People...don't you guys read the comments before posting? 50 people don't need to tell Jen the difference between a shamrock and a four-leaf clover....I'm sure she got it the first time.

Hobbit said...

Heh, heh. What Andygirl said. :-)

Um, and I know the clover vs shamrock thing was explained to death. But what's the deal with these wrecktastic SIX leaf clovers? Was I sick that day in Catholic school?

Anonymous said...

OK - who in their right mind rounded the stem and put that extra line across the bottom of the RIGHT HOOK cake
I am glad, however, that they put the tiny plastic flotsam shamrock on there so that we would know what it is supposed to be! I wonder where the flotsam phallis is...
Tracy

LaurenH said...

OK, so it's easy to make the smart-a** comments and all, but no lie: By the time I reached the last three I honestly thought "Wait a minute, what was the theme again...?"

I think I'd actually reached a point where I was de-sensitized to the wrecks. I'll be looking at those blobby six-fingered green thingies like "oh hey, that's nice..."

Bobbi Sharp said...

HOLY COW!!! You've just made my day.

The Lili Effect said...

Agree with Suzi, shamrocks have 3 leaves, while the 4-leaf clover you're showing is actually the 4-H symbol sans H's.

;)

Unknown said...

It's been awhile since I saw some CCC's (ptooie!!) on this site. Thought maybe they went the way of disco or, better yet, horseless carriages. Alas, they are still with us.... (thanks, Target!)

wv: misit

if bakeries stopped making CCC's (ptooie!!), I doubt anyone would misit.

jj said...

"Oscar lends a hand?" Haha-- my first thought was, "Big Bird, is that you?"

Thanks for including the Target ad! I knew it was only a matter of time when they started showing off their CCC handiwork at every holiday. They could probably get more money for that thing if they'd just cut a couple CCs off the stem.

Anonymous said...

The first one looks like someone painted the NBC peacock green.

Promise said...

Wow! That last one looks like a "flower" made by a drunken kindergartener.

Amapola said...

I'm devastated. Someone beat me to the obligatory, legendary EPCOT reference.
:-p

Vanessa Martin said...

Here's a good photo of real shamrocks (the type that grow on the ground in Ireland):

http://evenshine.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/shamrock.jpg

And here's another photo of the shamrocks that are common as houseplants:

http://www.krika.com/Tropical%20Garden/Tropical%20S/Shamrock-Plant.jpg

They are different types of plants yet both are called shamrocks. I have had a shamrock plant for 27 years and it's still very healthy. Each leaf is its own little plant, and if you get dead leaves you shouldn't yank them out because that will disturb the stems around it. You just trim off the dead leaves with scissors. Also, the reason each leaf has a crease down the middle is that at night the leaves fold up like little umbrellas.

With the difference between the rounded ground shamrock and the pointy house plant shamrock you can ALMOST excuse some of the decorators for being a little confused. For all of the other cake wrecks, you'll have to blame the Guinness.

Lyssanne said...

Wow. I'm pretty sure my 8-year old cousin is able to draw a shamrock without actually having to, you know, convert it to broccoli.

And my boyfriend is Irish, flaming red hair and all, and if he could breath Guinness, he would. Like Andygirl said, they're all alcoholics, and they're all okay with it.

rebecca said...

i think maybe they were going for a shamrock colored as the irish flag in the last one, but really missing the mark....oh dear!

akgreentea said...

The shamrock (3 leaves) is the proper symbol for St. Patrick. Supposedly he used it to help the Irish understand how the holy trinity works. However, these are awful shamrocks. The four-leaf clover is a symbol of luck. I hope that clears this up.

Kristers said...

I think the first one, if done in orange or brown would resemble the beginnings of all those turkey "cakes" [read: attempts] last November. Who's with me?

Melissa (& Billy) said...

All I see are misshapen heads of broccoli. Makes the Irish in me (and yes I do have some!) want to weep into my Guinness.

(Well, I don't drink, but if I did...)

As for that last one--now, I'm all for modern art but I'd rather see a Klee or a Pollock rendered into cake form than this. 0_o

Anonymous said...

Thank God they finally found a shape that so perfectly lends itself to CCCs! Yes, we acknowledge that making circles out of cupcakes is very difficult, but the shamrock--now there is a can't-miss CCC design!

Wait a minute...

--kate

Trevor said...

That last one is NOT a shamrock. I can't accept that. There's RED in it. Since when is that right?

lisadh said...

I'm sure no day is a good day to see green body parts. Oh, my!

Emily said...

LOVE the Seth and Amy reference!

Mary Connealy said...

Well, here's a point.

The people who made these cakes are probably so busy they just don't have time to do them better. Busy equals, lots of cakes, lots of orders, lots of money.

Where as, the people who did the Sunday Sweets Masterpieces obviously are eyeball deep in spare time.

So really, who's the success, huh? Huh? Huh?

TornadoBaby said...

Oh man... that right hook is looking more like something else than that...

*Yes, my brain went there*

Candice said...

Cupcake cakes are almost always disasters...

Anonymous said...

For all those insisting on telling Jen that her reference photo is actually a four-leaf clover rather than a shamrock, I suggest you re-read the post, and check out what the reference photo actually references...yes, that's right, a "clover."

Thanks for the laughs!

Anonymous said...

I like the way the triangle "shamrocks" (which definitely look more like the triangle-shaped houseplant variety than the typical St. Patty's day design) on the second one show frugality on the part of the decorator. The first one done (bottom right corner) is with the full pastry bag, and not wanting to waste any precious green icing, they kept going and squeezed out the very last bit on the last one (bottom left corner). Uh, yah...

Sarah said...

The last one looks very mushroomesque.

Anonymous said...

I was about to ask the same thing as one of the other comments -- why does the "right hook" have a "tip" on it's stem? It is as if the decorator was going for the penis look on purpose.
*Hahahahaha!!!*
And the last one is soooo awful, I'm surprised it made it in a box and on display!?!?! Really?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Thanks for the great laughs to get my Monday going!
~Chell

Anonymous said...

I dunno, maybe the Sham-Wow ones are trying to be Joshua Trees...

That's kinda Irish now right? ;p

Anonymous said...

I see the sham parts of all of these… at least they went light on the “poo” part today.

Anonymous said...

I recognize the right hook. He was my 1st husband. he was Irish too.

Courtney C. said...

The last one... what the crap!?!? I'm still squinting in confusion! I literally had my nose touching the screen and still, I got nothin'...

Confessions of a Closet Hoarder but you can call me Judy said...

That last one looks like an old piece of toast smothered in cream cheese with a broccoli handle. Egads!

Just a Small Town Girl said...

The 1st one reminds me of the turkey cake wrecks. The last one, I just don't get!

jiminycricket said...

Note to self: if I ever find myself making a shamrock CCC (at gunpoint, no doubt), skip the stem and try for a four-leaf clover.

bassgirl said...

The Sham-WOW looks more like a sham-cauliflower!

nikki said...

I think most of us saw that target add and wanted to send it in. I know I did!

Lilly said...

I loved the SNL reference. If target thinks the "clover" is attractive, I would like to see their other cakes. On second thought, I take that back I have no desire to be sick.

Anonymous said...

That "right hook" looks bothersome.

Lorraine said...

Obviously, the Guiness joke refers to the bakers! Sheesh - what some people try to pass off as decorated cakes. (wailing in an Irish accent) : Oh the Shame of it All!

Anonymous said...

After reviewing the Rockin' Shams
related wreckage, it is clear that the commonality is BROCCOLI. Whodathought?

Anonymous said...

"The Sham...WOW": looks like a bacteria.

Anonymous said...

Wow, #5, at first glance I thought it was a swastika haha. Why do all these only have 3 leaves? I thought it was lucky to have 4. And 3 leaves was just.. meh. Not that I can count the leaves on all of those.

I actually think that targets clovers were pretty good, considering they are made of cupcakes.

spikestar.wordpress.com

Anonymous said...

To Anonymous at 1:47 PM:

Actually, the reference photo only said "shamrock" when it was originally posted. Notice how it's crossed out now and says "clover" in bold. That's because this morning, people jumped all over her 8,000 separate times telling her that it was NOT a shamrock! So she edited her post.


Also, 100 people saying the same thing is acceptable up to a point. All 100 people could submit their comments at the same time and not have them show up on the comments list until hours later. That's why it says the blog owner has to approve the comments! Don't think that Jen and John sit there all day approving comments as they come in; they do a lot at once!


Give Jen and John a break. There are so many smarties and know-it-alls out there that make a fun blog annoying. Personally, I couldn't care any less about the difference between a shamrock and a clover. It just isn't that important in the grand scheme of things, now, is it?

mio said...

Let's all sing along with Bugs!

"I'm looking over a three-leaf clover that I've overlooked be-threeeeee!"

sendingtheclowns said...

Oh, for the love of...

HERE we go again.
>^@.@^<

================================
THIS JUST IN: "93,717 (combined)shamrocks and clovers later, they reached a consensus. The adopted word is now 'shamvers'. No, wait--maybe it was 'clorocks'..."

(And why is the so-called "right hook" facing left?)

Stephanie said...

That last one... yikes. Just yikes. And I don't even want to know how that one was deemed fit to sell.

duffylou said...

You tell me what holiday the "right hook" is celebrating and I am converting!

Katherine R said...

Hmm, I thought the handle on the last one looked more like the corpse of a Gumby.

Gumby

Sara said...

I think that last one is supposed to be a daffodil.

But even then, it's pathetic.

Anonymous said...

I love your Blog and now read it every day with both of my daughters. Your wit is hilarious and we truly enjoy reading what you come up with. It would be great if alot of other readers would leave well enough alone, stop trying to prove how "smart" they are and just let you be funny. Keep up the awesome work, there is more positivety behind you than negative. =)

Lynn said...

OMG, we got that Target "shamrock" cupcake cake at work today! It was slightly better looking than the picture you have, but not much.

Michele said...

If you look at the add on Target's site and hit the details button, they have a box at the bottom of the window that shows a description of the item in question. It seems this CCC *patooie* is "Prepared in our store by our talented decorators." Hmmmmmmm...

sweetbabies00 said...

I blushed.... great post!

TheHappyHomemaker said...

Jen -

Thank you for posting a photo of a four-leaf clover. All good Catholics know, however, that when one celebrates St. Patrick's Day in the traditional sense, the image should have six leaves. Three leaves represent the Trinity. Double that with a few pints of Guinness and you get six. I'm sure if you had ever been to Epcot, you would already know this.

sendingtheclowns said...

@ Michele:

"...It seems this CCC *patooie* is "Prepared in our store by our talented decorators.""

*******
That's all well and good, but that isn't telling us what they are being prepared FOR, now IS it?
Prepared for whatever may come? Prepared for burial? Prepared for combat?
I'm just suggesting that it's a very open-ended statement, all (ugly) things considered....

bakesperiments said...

That last one is um, yeah, wow..

El Stupido said...

Anyone besides me seeing wrangled Kermit hands?

BADKarma! said...

A couple of those look like something out of one of the early "D&D" Monster Manuals...

Anonymous said...

Every one of my baking genes is offended!
No...I take that back - Every one of my cookery genes is offended!
And there's no point allowing my Irish genes to speak publicly, as my comment would have to be banned.
As for my hatred of broccoli genes....


WV: ammater. Ha! Too easy!

Debra Svedberg said...

Have you guys seen this shamrock cupcake at instructables.com?
(it says cookies, but it's cupcakes)

http://www.instructables.com/id/Make_Shamrock_Cookies_from_Standard_Pans/

Anonymous said...

The last one looks like a deranged dreidel.

Anonymous said...

Wow, and that was Target's model cc cake used in their ad! That's pretty bad.

Tyler said...

Could that last one be some terrible interpretation of an Irish flag?

sendingtheclowns said...

@ Tyler:
Re: that last *cake*.
You could be on to something there! (Or, just "ON something". )The flag colors are sort of...there.
Try this: stand on your head and look at it.
(Makes a great party game!)

What I see is a sort of a sad, stringless, fretless,and not very attractive guitar with one hugeass aneurysm.
And no price sticker, or even a "Free to Good Home" sign.
If I don't leave right now, I'm going to cry!

Unknown said...

So many complaints about shamrocks vs. clovers... Actually if the leaflets are heart-shaped, it is not clover at all, but wood-sorrel (genus Oxalis). Clovers (genus Trifolium, in a totally different family) have round leaflets. And the flowers of those two plants are completely different.

Gary said...

Number five (the Right Hook) is probably the only circumcised Maltese Cross I've ever seen.

Anonymous said...

The last one looks like a clover that got ran over by a car, and then a baseball rolled on to it, and a tractor rolled over it and smashed it. And then some teenager spit his orangey red gum out a car window, and it got squished too. Then a drunk (on Guinness) wreckorator crossed the street, and said "dude, that would sell".

Arlene said...

Wow that last cake I mean really.. what the heck is it? That is the worst shamrock ever. Or maybe it's supposed to be a psychedelic one since I have a feeling someone was on something to have made that thing lol. As for the rest of them words can't even express the horror of them all.

DW said...

I never knew shamrocks or clovers could be phallic. Guess I learn something new every day....

Krusho said...

It's Kermit giving "jazz hands!"

Kim in ID

Dweezal said...

Shamrocks have three leaves "4 leaved(leafed?) clovers" have....4. The funny thing is, what most people consider to be clover is actually wood sorrel. Wood sorrel has heart shaped leaves, while clover has oval shaped leaves. :D

JenniferK said...

I am so NOT surprised that Target showcased that horrible CCC. I actually was kind of intrigued by them the first times I saw them, but I think I sent you two pictures, Jen, of our horrible CCC creations from target. One was a guitar that looked like a shovel, and the other was Elmo with goiter.

wv: jurreari Those of you who feel like lecturing about shamrock-vs-clover after the first few posts should be kicked in jurrearis. :)

Anonymous said...

If that last one is a daffodil, why is it wearing an eyepatch and yodeling? or is this an homage to The Scream? (now we know the true source of despair...)

I ran the USCAN said...

First time commenter. and i love the REALLY?! part! Keep up the great blog!

Radar said...

irish flag? like that idea for sure. and i guess i'm now a creep and a four-leaf clover

Anonymous said...

If you turn your head just right and squint, the last one could almost be a geographically inaccurate map of Northern Ireland...

(I refuse to believe that thing is supposed to be a shamrock).

Monica said...

I was at the grocery store yesterday and saw 2 Wrecks that made me regret not having my camera. The first was a frosting white-out job. I'd never seen one in person before yesterday; they're really ugly! Then, I saw a frosted brownie that said "Happy Birthday Gray." I'm guessing it was supposed to say "Gary," and it wasn't with the rest of the birthday cakes.

CookieMonster said...

hahahahahahaahhahahahah!

Really, I had no idea you could wreck a shamrock (or clover) so badly. Leave it to me to underestimate wreckerators.

Unknown said...

I swear that "Right Hook" cake looks like the Blue Oyster Cult logo. http://z.about.com/d/classicrock/1/0/n/K/boc_boc.jpg

Delibird said...

Cushlamacree! These monstrosities definitely put the "sham" in shamrock -- or shamMOCK, if you prefer.

When I saw that last one, I thought it was a mangled pair of old socks on a broccoli-flavored Otter Pop!

WATERBABY CHRISTINE said...

Erin go Bre-e-e-e-ch!

wv: larla
Toora loora larla, hush now don't you cry!

Diana said...

Guinness, as a beer, isn't a spirit. Spirits are distilled, beer is fermented. A spirit the Irish might have would be whiskey.

How one person can screw up a clover OR a shamrock is beyond me!

jengersnap said...

Is the NBC peacock green because it was stuffed in with the other St. Patty's Day wreckage?

Sara said...

LOL - As I former Target Bakery employee, I had to laugh at your call out. The sad thing, I've met the people at corporate who think they were SO creative in their St. Pat's designs. Sad. So very, very sad.

Dorn said...

Have me laughing to tears! Thanks for the post!

Anonymous said...

Awww, don't feel too bad, Jen. Shamrock used to just be an anglicised version of the Irish work for clover-seamrog.

Unknown said...

I so love the SNL reference, I mean REALLY!

Ophelia said...

Jen - If you have only ever seen Oxalis (what usually passes for shamrocks in North America) you might actually be delighted by a real shamrock - the leaves are tiny (the whole composite leaf is about as big around as a nickel, on a healthy plant), and the delicate pink flowers are so spring-like and pretty :)

Bar-b said...

What the hell were these people on? It was like they were told to bake/decorate blindfolded.

Thanks for compiling these and your narrative. Too effin' funny.

Gale said...

INSTRUCTIONS FOR BAKERY

Shamrock cupcake cakes are really quite easy. Take THREE cupcakes and put them together. Draw a little stem with frosting.

Repeat this until you have as many Shamrocks as will feed a party of people. Do not let the Shamrocks touch each other (again, THREE cupcakes in a shamrock, no more).

Otherwise...well, see this post.

10Volt said...

LOL! Shamwow! A moldy mushroom with a boil and a mess up on a TARGET CATALOG! TARGET! OMGLOLROFL!