Saturday, August 29, 2009

Ok, You Win. I'll Post the Divorce Cakes.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

I can't dislike viral photo e-mails too much - after all, one of them inspired this blog - but since there are now several divorce-cake e-mails flying through the interwebs, I'm pretty sure the only way I can get you lovely loyal Wreckporters to STOP SENDING THEM is by posting some. So...

"ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?!?"

Whoah. Sorry. The bitter vibes must be getting to me. Let's see if I can find something a little sweeter...


Ah, much better. Look how cute! Who knew blood spatters could be that adorable?
(And if you're wondering if the groom ever pushes the bride off, then the answer is yes.)

And by the way, while today's cakes are funny, they're also extremely well-made. I know this. So there's no need to point it out in the comments, Ok? We're laughing with these bakers, not at them.

In fact, Elite Cake Creations even specializes in divorce cakes. They get pretty creative with their designs, too:

Visualized metaphors. Gotta love 'em.

Yes, you really can buy miniature coffins for your wedding ring.

Of course, a good divorce cake doesn't have to be super elaborate:

I think that gets the point across, don't you?

While some divorce cakes can be more biting than funny, this one never fails to make me smile:

I think it's those little feet sticking out, Wicked Witch style. Heh. Plus, I was delighted to learn this was made by a bakery right in central Florida. Kudos, Sprinkles Custom Cakes!

Let's end with what I'm sure was a gag cake, but is still good for a chuckle:

Note to guys: don't get any ideas. We only think it's funny if someone ELSE gets it.

And lastly, I think this is a perfect time to wish my fantabulous hubby, John, a happy 11th wedding anniversary. (Yes, really.) I love you, Sweetie! Here's to growing old and increasingly alarming to our friends together.


Thanks to the many billions of you who sent in the various Divorce Cake e-mails. Over. And over. And over again.

- Related Wreckage: The Anti-Wedding Cake (aka The First Divorce Cake?)
Elizabeth Taylor said...

I have to admit I'm a little put off by people actually celebrating divorce. I can appreciate the relief from getting out, but I don't know....I suppose there are a lot of different factors involved. Having said that, the graveyard cake is cool.

Fluffybricks said...

I had a friend who got divorced. We got him a 'Happy Divorce, Tom!' cake. It was just a little chocolate cake with writing on it and it was awesome and the bakery had a good laugh.

Also as a dollhouse miniaturist (who blogs about it) I must say I love the miniature coffin though wonder if they 'stole' it from miniaturists and fitted it with a ring box, or if it's approximately 1:12 scale and I could pull the ring box out to use it as a dollhouse miniature?

Sarah! said...

Aw. While well-done, I can"t help but feel that, more than anything, those cakes are really friggin' sad.

What a depressing post.

=(

Terry Lee said...

sad, yet funny.

love the bride's maniacal smile on the second cake.

or am i just projecting?

VeggieT said...

Hey John and Jen, Congrats on your 11th Wedding Anniversary!

Are you going to get a cake? be sure to order it over the phone.... *JK* Have a wonderful anniversary!

Channie said...

Aww! Happy anniversary! May you have many more!

-Lindsey W.

Nikki said...

Is there anything we can't commemorate with a cake?

Having said that, may I have a piece?

wrecksistant said...

John n' Jen,

Congratulations! You're the most sicky-sweet couple I know! Well, aside from me and my boy :)

Love,
Your Wrecksistant

heather (errantdreams) said...

From the viewpoint that these weddings couldn't be as happy as some I know (like mine, thankfully), it's sad. But thinking of marriages like my parents', I'd have definitely gotten my mom one of these! And the celebration would have been heartfelt!

Little Lovables said...

these are great, I mean, not great due to the event (well, some divorces are great), but still great!!

And Happy Anniversary!!

Melinda said...

Congratulations on 11 years John & Jen! May there be no divorce cakes in your future!

Though I totally wish I would have thought of this when my now husband's divorce finally went through. His ex drug it out two years, then took their kids out to a fancy restaurant to celebrate when she got the final papers.

heather (errantdreams) said...

I can't believe I forgot to say happy anniversary!

Mrs. CH said...

These are just too funny! I guess why not celebrate something that is usually a difficult and sad ordeal? Talk about putting a positive spin on things, eh?

Happy 11th anniversary to you and John!

Katrina said...

Is it just a little fitting and funny that "Elizabeth Taylor" commented on the post about divorces? Hmmm?
And I know someone who was told on their anniversary, "Happy Anniversary, I want a divorce." I don't think any cake was involved though!
Happy 11th to you!

Jahzzie said...

Having just finalized a divorce a few months ago, this post totally makes me want one of these cakes!!! Yes, it can be sad when you are the one being divorced, and you didn't want it/deserve it/see it coming...
However, Sometimes a divorce is a blessing in disguise. Seriously, why would you want to keep a lying, abusive, cheating, lazy dead weight around your neck for the rest of your life? Lets not get into why we married them in the first place.

grimperspective said...

I know some people have said these are said (my fave is the wicked witch style groom-leg cake)but I have to politely differ. I submit to you that these are divorces that went well, so to speak. I mean, any divorce that ends in cake is better than one that ends up in a funeral, custody battle or anything getting lit on fire. Am I right?

summur braley said...

Happy Anniversary1 Here is to many more beautiful years of wreckage! :)

mustdestroyalltraces said...

i think the blood trail on the first one is my personal favorite. mainly just because of the visual dynamics it offers.

Jim Todd said...

Happy Anniversary, Jen and John!

Mary said...

today is my sister and brother in law's 11th anniversary too... must have been a good day for weddings. congratulations!

Suburban Princess said...

Cool cakes but I dunno about celebrating a divorce. It isnt really something to celebrate.

A Paperback Writer said...

Oh, if only I had known about such things when my ex left me for the younger, thinner woman!
Ah, but I'm coming up on a divorce anniversary soon. It's time to celebrate the healing with one of these, I think!
Bravo!
These are wonderful! Thanks for posting them.

Monica the Garden Faerie said...

I really wanted to have a divorce party, but I was low on funds at the time! ;-) I think the next big cake theme should be, a la Sex and the City, I'm NOT getting married cakes! :)

P.S. Anyone who thinks these cakes are sad hasn't been in a bad marriage!

Ariane said...

Speaking of chain emails, you have seen the Kuwaiti wedding cakes haven't you? That sets a whole new standard in...something. :)

Pam Walter said...

These cakes...like divorce...are just sad. http://blog.sweetservices.com/sweetscandyblog/

Sparky said...

Monica the Garden Faerie : It's not that people think the cakes are sad. It's more that the bad marriages that necessitate funny cakes are sad.

Happy Anniversary Jen and John!

Octan said...

There need to be ones that are just shaped like a wedding cake carved cleanly down the middle and a bride/groom figure on top with a smug, "glad that's over with" look on its face.

Elizabeth Taylor said...

@Katrina....I'm glad you picked up on that. ;-)

@Monica the Garden Faerie...All joking aside, my 24 year marriage has been in the crapper for the past few years. Just trying to get kids out of high school and finances in order. When the time comes, I might privately celebrate, but can't imagine hosting an event that requires cake. I think Sparky summed it up pretty well.

Brian said...

It's your anniversary today, too? We're celebrating our 12th today. :-)
Happy Anniversary, Jen and John!

Kirthan said...

I'll never understand how they do those upside down tiered cakes! They defy gravity.

Glory von Hathor said...

That garbage cake is great. It even has a teeny tiny rat. But my favourite is the Oz cake. Think how much better Miss Havisham's life would've been if she's been able to get a cake like that delivered, instead of hanging on to the old one.

Dennis said...

I think it's particularly funny that one of the garbage bags is a "Glad" bag.

Amy said...

I especially like the graveyard one.

~Amy B.

Goof said...

Happy Anniversary Jen & John ((((HUGS))))

A) I hope I never have to get a divorce from my wonderful hubby

B) If be some bizarre chance that I'd have to....I don't think I'd be ordering a divorce cake :p

C) But for some reason they are still funny. Thanks for posting them.

Barbara_in_WA said...

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

Belinda said...

The best thing about divorce cakes? Your ex is no longer entitled to half!

Lindsey said...

I would laugh if I got that last cake, but only because I don't have a sister.

Anonymous said...

I have to agree that you might not find the humor in these unless you've been in and gotten out of a bad marriage. Personally, I celebrate everyday that I am no longer married. I was never happily married but I am very happily divorced.

If I had to pick one of these to aid in the celebration, it would have to be the upside down tier cake - brilliant.

Happy anniversary to you and your co-blogger/husband.

Zanelle said...

I laughed maniacally at all the divorce cakes. Loved the upsidedown cake with the grooms feet sticking out. I had a very amiable divorce but it still hurt. Thanks for lifting my spirits.

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who doesn't get the icky greenish trail down the second cake?

Marita said...

Happy Aniversary guys. Like many of my blog "friends" it seems like I know you. Enjoy your cake. I'm sure there will be a more cheerful one then the ones you showed today.

marypoppins said...

Anonymous said...
Am I the only one who doesn't get the icky greenish trail down the second cake?
________________________________
I see what you think, but look again. It's the inside of the cake- a slice has been removed from each layer.

lindsay said...

I can understand someone wanting to celebrate a divorce - as a divorcee myself, I can tell you how thrilled I was when the final papers came through after 3 agonizing months of being in process - but feeling compelled to celebrate it in cake?? Maybe not...then again, cake and a divorce party certainly beats an all day bender, or a weekend in Vegas where you hook up with everything that has a Y chromosome.

Sili said...

The last one was more fun than reasonable to me, because all the others had been *women's* cakes.

It took a while to realise that this one might be from the husband.

Mo said...

Totally appropriate to celebrate the dissolution of a sacred union with cake. Totally.

- Maureen - I argue with Darce.

AlisonH said...

Happy anniversary!

deemack said...

Happily married, and yet, this totally brought the LOLs! Some of those cakes were really big, though. You would have to have a huge party to celebrate the divorce to eat all that cake...

Thank you for sharing! None of my friends forwarded any of these photos my way. Stinkers!

And a very Happy Anniversary to you!

Lisa V said...

Wait a minute.... (takes a second look at the first picture) ... you get presents for a divorce too?! Geez, us single gals REALLY get ripped off!

S3XinthePantry said...

Happy anniversary!

Reuven said...

These cakes promote violence against men! To even the score, I'm going to bake a "battered woman" cake today. Now, what flavor to make the batter...

archersangel said...

why are ther pieces taken from the second one?

BTW i'd like to see dary queen do divorce ice cream cakes.

also happy anniversary!

VeggieT said...

I wonder why no naked-carrot-jockeys showed up for the occasion???

John and Sarah Sperry said...

Happy Anniversary!!! I think the divorce cakes are sad... But, hey, what better time to eat cake then when you're depressed!? :D

Fluffy Bricks said...

We were the ones to give our friend the divorce cake- it wasn't him getting it made for himself and throwing himself a party. We wanted to cheer him up and remind him that he can now move on from her emotional abuse. That in itself was sad, but really, he could now go off and do what he wanted to do. And it had been a very long divorce process, he needed something relieving.

... he also got a friend to throw his ring into a volcano in New Zealand and film it. I think that's awesome.

Timba said...

Aw, congrats to y'all! 11 years is a long time to put up with someone.

Becky said...

Awww!!! Happy 11 years! This is also my anniversary with my husband. For us it is 5 years of marriage. I can't wait until my hubby comes home from work so I can tell him.

janet2buns said...

I get the injured ex-husband, broken luggage and scattered shoes on the first cake, but what the heck is the green ladder thing zig zagging across it?

janet2buns said...

Errrr...I mean "on the second cake"

Jerry said...

Congratulations John and Jen!

The garbage cake is my favorite.

BillyD said...

I find the violence of the first two cakes off-putting (blood smears? really?). You'll notice that the Berlesconi cake did not have any blood on it - I suspect because many people wouldn't find that level of violence towards women (even a fake, cake-topper woman) acceptable. Here endeth the lesson.

But what the heck is the long, brown, striped thing down the side of the second cake?

Rachel said...

I haven't ever been married, but I came close once a few years ago, and (in retrospect) thank heaven it didn't happen because I'm sure I would have been divorced by now!

I do find these sad, yet funny. There is something to be said for dark humor in some situations.

And happy anniversary!

Bilby P. Dalgyte said...

Ha! I love the upside down one :)

Naantje said...

First: Happy Anniversary!

Second: the cakes are magnificent! It might seem strange to happily married people, but I totally get this. My dad started cheating on my mum when she had to go to the hospital for what doctors thought was breast cancer (it wasn't cancer, but she had to stay in hospital for a long while). She didn't now at that time, but they started having fights, the house was never a cosy place, and I remember realising something was wrong when she didn't even get a kiss on New Year.

When she finally found out, he had be cheating on her for four years, and he took of with the most idiotic bimbo you'll ever come across. It was awefull, but two months into the separation we noticed how much more relaxed it was at home, no longer the constant tension of an upcoming row. When the divorce papers were finally signed, we cracked open a bottle of champagne, and I think we had cake as well, but it didn't have special inscriptions or anythin. Just a plain, yummy cake. Sometimes, divorce is a thing to celebrate!

Sharon M said...

Wow. Divorce cakes. Hmmm.

The glories of American ingenuity! Hooray for capitalism?...

Michelle said...

Unlike these cakes... May you have many more years of happiness and wonderfullness together!!

Anonymous said...

Mixed feelings here. I look and 'Oh funny, haha'. But the violent images are just a bit much for me, on a cake. If there were ones of women being shot or shoved down a baked flight of stairs, or being dragged, there would be a huge outcry. I'm not in favor (even in pastry) of violence against any person, male or female.

Monica said...

Happy Anniversary! I love your blog. It makes me smile everyday.

Mira8 said...

If you've never been through the pain of divorce, you don't know the sadness, anger, mourning and other assorted ickyness that goes with it. So if these cakes are helping people process that, amen and hallelujah. Don't judge.

And on a happier note, congrats John and Jen!

john (the hubby of Jen) said...

To the Anonymous poster who just submitted an angry comment that I rejected,

I didn't put up your comment because I didn't want you to get bashed on the comment board. Please understand, Jen uses anger and exasperation as humorous tools. She always appreciates the work that you guys go through to find wrecks and it's still exciting for us to watch the wrecks roll in every day. Aside from the thorax cake. And any porn cakes. But I digress.

No offense was meant by Jen's comments. She was just kidding. And, by all means, keep the wrecks coming.

Thanks,

john

Lynn said...

Someone always loses in divorce and I think it is a sad situation, even if in the big scheme of things, it's for the best. Nothing to celebrate about but the cakes are certainly well done !

Lynn said...

May you and John have a very long and happy marriage...Happy 11th Anniversary ! LOL

Alida said...

I'm having Han Solo in carbonite (from Chef Duff) at my 40th birthday/end of my first year as a single woman after 20 years party. Because every recent divorcee needs a man on ice ;)

I love these! I'm halfway tempted to link my ex to the site!

Anonymous said...

am i the only one that doesn't get the "rid of old man" one with the big white swirly thing? what is that, a tornado?

Anonymous said...

Does anyone else find it a little alarming and unfunny to have murder and malice so celebrated? While the one cake of the husband pushing the wife off was no better than these, it was considerably more mild. I can't help but wonder if any bakery would agree to portray a mutilated or buried wife next to a smiling husband on a cake (or a husband robbing a wife of all her possession and leaving her in the poorhouse, as I've also seen), or if anyone would find it acceptable, much less funny. More than likely, the bachelor to be would be hauled off to the police station for questioning and chastised by those around him. So why put up with it, and reward it, the other way around? (For a fun alternative way of looking at it, replace "wife" and "husband" with "black person" and "white person" and see how it looks.)

Anne said...

Sprinkles Cakes is in Winter Park? Awww, now I'm feeling nostalgic for my Rollins days.

Lucille Ball Jr. said...

happy anniversary!
~LBJr.

Melissa (& Billy) said...

Whoa! Some of the pics on the 'groom pushes the bride' Flicr site are NOT work safe! Just thought I'd warn ya =)

(granted there's nothing on your site that says it would be so I'm not blaming anyone =) Just FYI )

These are just...wow. If someone hated their ex enough to spend this kind of cash to get a divorce cake...eek. Scary.

Jessica said...

AWESOME!
Divorce is a new beginning, and what better wayt to start a new chapter than with HUMOR!

I wish I'd had a divorce cake and I may just have one belatedly!

shawne said...

Hooray for the Winter Park shout-out! I pass Sprinkles every day to and from work!

Hope to make it to the book signing on the 22nd!

Anonymous said...

I work in a divorce office, and I must say that I think I may need to suggest these to a few of our clients... Amazing.

Sylvia said...

Seriously?! How awesome are these.. I've never even heard of a "divorce cake" and can't believe that people actually make these. Even though they are probably going to ruin people's lives... they are quite amusing. My favorite it the first one.
-sylvia
Cigar Reviews

Perspective said...

These would be cute cakes if the message weren't so...y'know.

To me, the cakes with the violence, the trash-tossing, etc., speak more of a mean-spirited attitude of bitterness (and festering misandry) than of a healthy moving-on. The longer you let it figure prominently in your life, the longer you continue the bad relationship, dontcha think?

And yes, I've been in abusive relationships. I found if I "celebrated" my escape, it took longer to REALLY get over it. Spite helps no one. The sooner you get over it, the sooner you...well...get over it.

My unsolicited opinion.

djarianna said...

I am divorced. I've never had a happy divorce party or a happy divorce cake.

It amuses me to no end that comments range from "funny, but sad", "this is depressing", or "I'm put off by this" because I simply cannot understand why people feel this way. I guess bc I'm assuming the people who would have such a cake are celebrating and not crying in their ice cream cartons agonizing over the failed marriage. I'm also assuming that for the cake owners their marriage was probably over quite awhile ago anyways, so its more tongue in cheek.

So, why exactly, are are divorce cakes not allowed? Just curious

Anonymous said...

Happy 11th Anniversary. I love your tribute to your husband that you will grow old n alarming to your friends. Awesome.

As for the divorce cakes, in some ways it could be a way to heal the wounds divorce leave behind. It's never a fun or easy thing to go through. I think it's better if your best friend gets it for you then buying it yourself. Laughter is the best medicine.

Thanks again you n your husband for an awesome websight!!!!