Yeah, I think I'm going to have to rescind that.
And to think I was horrified at the split sheet cake. Yowza.Let's see: moldy camo and blue roses. [Chandler Bing voice] Could this BE any more wrong, Ila P.?
Friday, January 9, 2009
How to Make Your Twins Hate You
Friday, January 9, 2009
You know how I've said before that the main thing I despise about CCCs (that's cupcake cakes, for you newbies) is all the icing slathered in the gaps? And how "cupcake mosaics", or CCCs that use individually iced cupcakes, aren't quite so bad?
Yeah, I think I'm going to have to rescind that.
And to think I was horrified at the split sheet cake. Yowza.
Let's see: moldy camo and blue roses. [Chandler Bing voice] Could this BE any more wrong, Ila P.?
Yeah, I think I'm going to have to rescind that.
And to think I was horrified at the split sheet cake. Yowza.Let's see: moldy camo and blue roses. [Chandler Bing voice] Could this BE any more wrong, Ila P.?
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Well, at least it's the boy who got the short end of the stick this time...kind of evens things out. Of course, I think, as far as short sticks go, this is just a fragment of bark with a few shreds of xylem clinging weakly to it. If that's supposed to be camoflage, I don't want to see this decorator's rendition of freshly vomited Trix cereal...
Poor Vernon. Unfortunate name, ugly cupcakes, and not as many cupcakes as his sister. I think we know who's the favorite.
It looks like the right corners are moldy!
As a December 19th baby.. I've had to share many cakes with my Christmas day baby cousin...much to my dismay. Parents, it's not cool to combine things, just get them two separate small cakes!
Can you tell who the favorite twin is?
Jeez, moldy cupcakes will sure make your twin hate you, especially when about 85% of this "cake" is made up of cute blue and white cupcakes that match yours.
Poor Vernon got less cupcakes... he will now be scarred for life!
I love the Chandler Bing voice
word verification
Cabli - Actually chablis but after you've downed the whole bottle
Vernon... I told you eating all of the cheese doodles and spinach dip would make you sick! But next time, aim for the trash can!
Looks like Vernon got jipped on his cupcakes!
Poor Vernon!
I mean could the parents have been any more obvious about which twin they like more?
I think we can tell who the favorite in this family is. Jenny, Vernon's going to be talking about you in therapy years from now. I can just hear the conversation that took place when this cake was displayed.
"How come Jenny gets blue roses and I got mold?"
"Mold is manly son..."
"But I want a blue rose...my quarter of the cake looks contagious."
"Shaddup and eat your mold, boy. It'll put hair on your chest...and maybe your tongue."
Poor Vernon - he's not as loved as his sister... (notice how his part isn't even half?
YK, they could've at least colored half of "Happy Birthday" camo! That way, it'd be more "even" looking! LOL.
WV: alaviv - combining said twins' names to cut down on cupcakes
Well... It is vile. And as the mother of twins, I learned very early on to get them their own cakes.
Not to mention the 60-40 split! Geez... what ARE people thinking?
(Please let me be in the top 10, PLEASE let me be in the top 10!)
Obviously, mom must love Jenny more than she loves Vernon. Jenny got way more cupcakes! And Vernon's cupcakes look disgusting.
No,no. All you have to do is pick off the moldy part and spray the tray with lysol. The rest should be just fine.
Maybe Vernon and Jenny are conjoined twins, and Vernon's definitely the uglier of the two? Then this cake is entirely appropriate.
LOVE the border, but there's nothing worse than losing your R in the crack.
Poor, poor Vernon.
Mom always loved Jenny more.
EW! EW! EW!
I have to say Vernon did get the short end of the stick er cake. The camo is clearly not in equal share to the roses part.
Yikes, and you can tell which twin mom favors, what with the actual Happy Birthday being in blue and white.
humm, random moldy CCC? whats with the green blog up in the right hand corner? this cake is just all kinds of wrong!
we needn't quite wrack our brains as to whom the favourite twin is...
LOL @ Chandler Bing voice!! :)
How to make your twins hate you: Give one of them a normal name, name the other one Vernon lmao. Poor Vernon, they could have at least split those cup-cakes up 50/50!
OMG that is horrible!
I so feel Jenny and Vernon's pain. As a twin I have always had to share a birthday and birthday cake with my brother. I have NOT, however, been subjected to this kind of humiliation. Poor kids.
Jen, are you sure you aren't the twin in question here and finally getting your revenge on mom?
The Florida Gator loving Hices at
http://casahice.blogspot.com
GO GATORS!
I think they made the camo part extra nasty to try to convince you the electric-blue rose section looks okay.
Let's not reject all mosaic CCCs just because of this one wreck. If we followed that policy, we'd have to reject all cakes, and that, my friends, is what they call an "unacceptable outcome."
So it's final... evil twins are made, not born.
Maybe Jenny has more cupcakes because she has more friends coming to the party. Poor Vernan - double whammy!
Jenny HAD to get more cupcakes. No frosting letters on earth would've shown up on that vomitous camo.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Well, it has potential.
Get rid of the camo,
the "border,"
and write their names more like the way that "Happy Birthday" was written...
Okay I'll have to do have of the lower cupcakes with blue roses and half with camouflage. Okay so that's 1,2,3, Darn the girls got 16 and the boy has 14, oh well I'll just add some more camouflage one on the top part. There! Oh, now it looks unbalanced. Okay I'll put a few blue flower ones on the top left. There! Now all I have to do is Write a the Happy birthday on the remaining cup cakes. Well, I'm too lazy to make a new icing bag so I'll just use the blue one I have already. Okay now there's a few more cup cakes left over on the top. Well I'm still too lazy to make another decorating bag so I'll just add more blue flowers to those one. There! Done! I think it looks pretty good don't you? Well I do and if they don't then too bad, besides I don't really care, my boss never says anything anyways.
Word verification -Plata: Ken I getcha plata pasta?
Someone actually requested this? And paid for it?! This "cake" is wrong on so many levels.
not to mention that jenny has more blue roses than vernon has camo. yecch.
think we can get Congress and Barack Obama to pass a law banning CCCs?
OMG.
A fairly decent CCC ruined by that gosh-awful conglomeration on the right? YUCK!
~Amy B.
So... Vernon is the unwanted, unloved child because he gets the rotting cupcakes. Sucks to be Vernon.
Yup, he's gonna need some therapy. Know whut uh meen, Vern?
Rebecca
Ew those definitely look moldy. Bleh!
Yikes. But, you must admit, the names are nicely off centre.
Zita
They... may not be twins... perhaps. Vernon could be... Jenny's father! That's the ticket! I'm sure he'll understand his gross third of cupcakes.
Oh good grief!! If I were doing a combined cake, it wouldn't be something so obviously divided. The goal is to avoid revealing who my favorite one is, and remain as visibly unbiased as possible.
Then again, I am not some other parents who fell out of the common sense tree and whacked the noggin on every idiot branch on the way down from it.
they weren't doing too badly (as far as CCC's go) until they got to the camo part. It was all downhill from there.
That was just frighteningly ugly, on so many levels.
I totally Chandler Bing voiced that line!
Who wants to place bets that Vernon is going to go all postal one day in a Walmart bakery or something?
While wearing blue roses camouflage, nonetheless.
I love the three random mold-cakes in the corner. I imagine poor Vernon walked into the kitchen in the middle of the frosting endeavor and complained about the lack of, ahem, camo and so Mom frosted the last 3 and shoved them in the corner to shut him up.
Now imagine you're a guest at this party. How do you not laugh? Hysterically?
Today's my birthday, and my twin's birthday, so I feel an extra connection to the cake today :) THANKS MOM for never making us a cake like this!!!!
To add insult to injury, poor Vernon's name is going DOWN right to left, while perky Jenny's name is going UP.
(word verification: beduch - way past time to change the sheets)
Why are there 53 cupcakes? Why could there not have been two cakes? Each with 24 cupcakes? Or each with 26 1/2 cupcakes, if the 53 is somehow significant?
So many questions. This blog raises so many questions in my mind that I never dreamed I would ask. sigh.
Maybe they're not twins, but just happen to have birthdays on the same or near the same day. Maybe Jenny is twice Vernon's age and that's why she gets twice as many cupcakes.
Or maybe Jenny has twice as many friends coming to their party. Poor Vernon!
It's weird how often the WV seems appropriate. Sporetty. Ew, some mold sporettys must have gotten on Vernon's half (third) of the cake. Wait, maybe that explains the imbalance. The mold sporettys got in a couple places on the cake and are slowly taking it over. Just leave it a couple of days, and all the cupcakes will be in the mold color scheme. Problem solved!
if they had just stopped at 'happy birthday', it would have been alright. now, it's not. and i what is UP with that ugly frosting? nothankyou.
You'd think they could have at least given the boy more cupcakes! I mean yes, I can see that they're hideous and the less of those you have to look at the better but really...ugly cupcakes AND not as many. Double whammy for you Vernon! (Wait...VERNON!? Sorry kid, triple whammy)
On the other side (literally) without the 'mosaic' arrangement I think the cupcakes with little blue roses on them are kind of cute.
I have to say, there is no reason I can think of to do this to your kids. I mean, making a cake yourself costs next to nothing, so why not make the kids their own cakes? I can't believe they both got a CCC, one part of which looks like it came down with the Crud.
Is it just me or is shape made by the white cupcakes reminiscent of a hand gun with Vernon's name as the trigger? And with the blue, teeth staining, icing on the "pretty" part, I bet the parents couldn't give away the extras after the party was over.
Besides the puke cup cakes... I don't get blue roses!!! Blue??? Where do they grow? They Don't!
I am all for combined birthday parties because two of my kids have birthdays just two weeks apart. But I always, ALWAYS have two cakes. There is just no way you can combine Sponge Bob and Tinkerbell.
Though I wonder… maybe I should call that in somewhere to see what they do. No… love the kids too much.
WOW! So unfair on so many levels. OK parents listen up and I'll tell you a secret. Spend a few extra bucks and get your kids separate cakes!
My sister and I share the same birthday, but are 5 years apart. My parents have been getting us separate cakes for 31 years!
Nope. It can't.
Wow, as a twin, the issue in therapy later will really be that he now has proof that his parents love his sister more.
My 4 year old daughter saw this and asked me, "Is that throw up?"
Not to mention his name is Vernon.
WV: pubar - pucked up beyond all repair
My farorite part of this is that, even though the designer took care to line up the borders consistently, they obviously did the airbrushing after sticking all of the cupcakes together. Instead of Chandler I have Stewie's voice saying "For every mis-sprayed cupcake I find I shall kill you."
What is up with the funky ones in the top right corner??
OMG! I have a friend who is getting ready to have twins next month, I'm so sending her to your site to see this!
I'd better not EVER see this at her twins' party!!
Actually, if you count, Vernon got 14 cupcakes (not including the 2 with his name) and Jenny got 13 (not including the two with her name and the ones that are technically for both of them cause they say "Happy Birthday")
Even my 7 year old said "I'd hate to be that poor kid." bahahaha
WV - shortick This cake is not short ick, it's very long on the ick factor.
I really like the border. And the border gaps. Thankfully the didn't do a curved border around the whole thing. And the "y" from birthday has the blue icing and the green moldy border. Lovely.
Word Verification = fismsse
the sticky aftermath of a shaken soda can
To Dellboi2U:
Blue roses do exist , although not totally naturally.
check out:Wikipedia - blue roses
My aunt and I came within two days of sharing a birthday, so I'm used to shared parties. But if you've gotta share the cake, pick something both like and just use that.
Wait, is only one of the twins Jamaican?
Ooooooh Rachel...(shaking head)...please tell me you're not an accountant!
Bad enough you have to share a birthday with someone, but to share 3/4 of your cake - and the nice part? That's just cruel.
Because someone mentioned the annoyance at sharing birthdays: my grandmother was born on Dec. 19, her older sister on Dec. 18. To this day, she's still bitter over the fact they celebrated the birthday's together. Heck, she even got married on her birthday because she had to choice between her birthday and her sister's, and she refused to get married on the day she'd relented for so long.
So, in conclusion: Vernon is doomed to become a bitter old man, always demanding he gets his own cake for his birthday.
Thanks for explaining to me that the hideous green/orage/black/gray gunk is "camo".. If you insist, then that's what we'll call it...
"Here Sally, my shift is done and I only finished 3/4 of the cake... Can you finish the rest? Thanks. Oh yeah, they're supposed to pick it up in an hour."
WV - epite... I'd take epite, but I'm afraid of what that color combo will do to my GI tract.
Poor Vernon. His name sucks AND he doesn't even get half the love on the cake. We can see someone picks favorites here...
I absolutely LOVE the sad attempt at a border! That poor boy!!
The cake is slightly sadder than the fact that his name is Vernon. Jenny is at least a 'cute' name.
that's just one of the ugliest CCCs or cakes i've seen in life. period! what a traumatizing bday for poor jenny and vernon ...
Poor kid, not only does he have a name like "Vernon" (Hey Vern!...or the mean uncle in Harry Potter), he gets cheated out of his own ugly cake.
Maybe Jenny had more friends, that's why she got more cupcakes.
I especially love how the blue rose cupcakes form a lovely gun shape, aggressively dividing the camo cakes.
I thought those were Rastafarian cupcakes, you know like maybe ol' Vern was really into Reggae and Cool Runnings. Mold, however, seems to be the consensus. The airbrushing is rather disgusting though. NO CAKE FOR YOU!- The Cake Nazi. ;D
WV: Mullet- The type of haircut worn by the person who made this CCC disaster. How appropriate. ;D
Ugh. That IS hideous. I can't even imagine the fight if I tried to pass this off on my twins. We've done cupcakes for school twice - half chocolate and half white. All white frosting and each kid picked a theme for a pick or ring to stick on the top. No bright blue poo, and the young ones all got Disney plastic rings to wear and lose. Not creative, but not wrecky.
This is horrible.. It looks like the "cake" has a disease or blight that is slowly spreading and will eventually engulf the entire thing. Run Jenny! It's too late for Vernon :(
Haha I think that's the cake equivalent of having to go to the corner for a time-out.
WV: ologrem - like a hologram, only French.
I'm a twin (and, funny enough, my twin sister, C.Beth, posted about our twinniness today, and in a comment I mentioned how twins should always get separate cakes). This picture made me really sad - no sarcasm here. :(
Oh, and there's even a "border". Jenny and Vernon are such lucky kids.
HA.
Boy, it sucks to be Vernon.
The more cupcake cakes you post, the more determined I am to dislike cupcakes and especially cupcake cakes.
EW...just EW. Definitely a wreck from any angle...
The commentary is great, as always!
How was this idea even okay???? Totally horrifying.
My four year old daughter just asked me "What is that on the cake?" I told her it was weird icing. She replied "Spinach icing?"
I laughed out loud at this one. My friend had the same experience with her two libra babies birthdays. Shame she didn't take a pic. So glad that I usually buy my own b'day cake.
wvotd..blityren..."Vernon blames his life of crime on Blityren. Blityren is the psychological condition created by a life time of inequality based on CCC portions."
You know, don't torch me on this one, but I kind of sympathize with the baker. I work in a pie shop, and sometimes we get weird requests, and we do them, despite common sense or aesthetics, and I'm sure the customer must be equally confused as us, but all we can say to each other is "That's what they wanted!" So maybe this is one of those cases.
What a creative idea for a blog, I am lovin it!
No frosting parity, either - we know who momma's favorite is....
I agree that camoflage cake frosting is icky (what's the point? you want to hide the cake?)
but I am coming to agree with my mother that blue colored food is just wrong (always excepting blueberries). When she planned receptions for people she always discourage blue punch, etc. Now I see why.
Does it seem like poor Vernon was just an afterthought? The decorator seems to have been 2/3 done when he or she remembered, "Oh shoot, almost forgot the other kid....what's his name...Vernon?"
I'm an identical twin myself, so I feel the kids' pain. Making us share a noun--that is, calling us "the twins" or "the girls" instead of using our names--was bad enough.
At least my parents always had the sense to buy two separate cakes of equal size and equal attractiveness.
Just a thought...Perhaps the cake is for two people sharing close or same birthdays and the cupcakes represent their ages. Maybe Jenny is the mother who would be 36 if I counted correctly. Again, if I counted correctly, that leaves the son Vernon to be 16 years old. That't realistic.
Oh dear. Oh dear. And I have a wreck i bought just to post here. Will be sending it along shortly. It is military themed as well... Oh I can't wait...
Wow that is horrible! Yes, you can tell who is favored!
You probably don't hear this much, but I want to thank Cake Wrecks for giving me my appetite back. It wasn't this cake that did it. It was some of the Sunday Sweets, and reading the descriptions of the cakes (chocolate cake with raspberry filling!) on the decorators' sites. I've been sick with a stomach bug for the last couple of days, and I finally feel like eating again. Thanks Cake Wrecks!
Egads, that's aweful. Poor Vernon.
...and maybe Vernon will be glad that nobody can see his cupcakes anyway.
What's worse? The fact that the person's name is Vernon, or that he has to eat cupcakes that look as though they've been eaten and ahem...given back...already?
EEEEEEEEEEEE-YUCK!!
Gad. I hope Vernon's grandparents start a savings account for him, because not all health insurance covers psychiatric therapy.
Camo cupcakes--for the kid you wish would disappear.
Pleuroses!
Or maybe your readers aren't familiar with The Glass Menagerie...
So that's where my agar went.
Revenge of the girl twin; unlike ashley's sad side, Jenny has much more cake. Take that, Vernon! Tell Glen hello!
Ugh! As someone who had to share a birthday cake her entire childhood (Dec 23, older brother Dec 26), I can tell you that is NOT cool, even ignoring the fact that this ccc looks like someone threw up on it.
What's not to like? Buttercream...Good. Words spelled correctly...Good! Moldy frosting...GOOD. (best Joey voice, of course)
Could this BE any more wrong
It already is. The kid's name is Vernon. I think that's probable cause for CPS to come around and take the kids to a safe house.
If I were Vernon (and I actually like that name!) I would steal as many of Jenny's cakes as possible in cupcakey vengeance.
Hilarious! Poor Vernon; the parents couldn't have made it more obvious about which twin they liked more...LOL!
Anna Marie
Poor Vernon...maybe she saved so much money on the crappy cake she can afford to pay for his therapy later ;)
What was the thinking behind this cake??? Was it the idea of the parents or the decorator?? Poor Vernon!!! See ya in therapy buddy!
Poor Vernon. This is how sociopaths are made. First it's uneven cc on dreadful ccc, next it's lighting things on fire, next cats are missing from the neighborhood. It all can be avoided by giving each kid their own darn cake.
WV=extri. it only takes a little extri effort to get a decent birthday cake.
Flowers for Jenny, barf for Vernon. How sweet.
Besides failure in terms of decoration, the other thing I hate about CCCs is that cupcakes aren't nearly as tasty as cake...
What a cheap way to celebrate the twins' birth. I mean, get each child a smaller cake, right? Or if you're going to do the CCC, at least make them presentable! This "CCC" is FUGLY.
If I was Vernon I'd feel so slighted (not to mention sick.. LOL)!
I totally love your blog! Way to funny!
My husband thinks the whole cake is supposed to be a white & rose covered gun on a camo background. I give him points for imagination.
I suspect that this is a husband/wife shared birthday. Jenny tried to get ol' Vern to tell her what he thought would look nice on a cake. Presented with a typical display of manly preferences, she caved and went with the camo.
What the hell?
Scary. Just plain scary.
"Mother always did like Jenny best." *Vernon starts sucking his thumb*
Poor Vern, now he'll have years of therapy on top of the intestinal upset from eating those stale, moldy cupcakes.
Wow, poor Vernon. His side is much worse than Jenny's.
I like how Vernon's name is in a haven of white cupcakes.
I love the Chandler voice too. And it is soooo appropriate for this monstrosity.
I don't think the roses are that bad...but that camo is awful! I didn't even realize that's what it's supposed to be...I thought maybe there was some sort of massive food coloring explosion on that corner of the cake...
I think I can guess who the favored child is here.
Instead of Chandler, I can hear Janice squawking "Oh...my...Gawwwwwwwwd!" and Monica running around in sheer terror screaming to be woken from this horrible cake nightmare. Joey would eat the whole thing in a heartbeat though :-)
Word verification - ratont: a contraction of "rat on it" as in, this cake would look better with a ratont.
i like this idea
Maybe it's not gor twins, mayb e Jenny has an imaginary friend called vernon and insisted he get his name on the cake....
there is just no WAY i would pay money for that horrific mess!
What did Vernon do to deserve moldy cupcakes? I'm pretty sure this is the beginning of Vernon running away to join the army...
Awww poor kids!
Mothers: don't let bad cakes happen to your children!
Camo just DOESN'T work for frosting. Actually, I'm now curious: Has anyone seen an appetizing cake with camo frosting?
What did Vernon ever do to deserve this??
I'm guessing that Vernon is the "stepson."
just another reason to make sure your twins have separate cakes!
Can I just say....I am so INTO each CW entry...that I find myself doing this:
1. Open Cakewrecks page
2. Scroll down just enough to see Jen's opener.
3. Sit and ponder a moment what I think I am going to see...
4. Scroll down to view picture...and usually follows is an OMG!!!
No other blog makes read in such a specific way!!! Thanks Jen LOL
I have twins boy/girl and they are 3. I have Never combined their cakes and I NEVER will! I do like some CCC's, but I still wouldn't combine my kids cakes together. Keep up the great posts!
And I'm sure that Vernon was happy that his sister got, like, TWICE as much space as him. Were these people absent ont the day when the math teacher explained that when you divide something in half, the pieces should be equal?
Yes, getting the name "Vernon" at birth rather foreshadowed the ugly cupcakes and settled the "Mom loves you best" question early, didn't it?
If any of my children ever ask for a CAMO cake, remind me to MAKE IT MYSELF, cause whatever I came up with couldn't possibly be as aweful as all the camo cakes I've seen featured here (ok...it could, but not likely).
Really, you need to do a military theme for Veterans day or something (and follow up with a Sunday sweets to show how it's spos' to be done). :-)
That is just so wrong on so many levels! My son and daughter share the same birthday (although, 4 years apart). I would never do that to them! Its bad enough that they share a birthday, even worse that it's 3 days after xmas.. and to do that would just be overkill lol! Poor kids, therapy will be needed in the near future.
Wow...awful cake, I know the kids would have thought so as well...
If I had twins I would make sure each child had their own special cake...birthdays are important!
My grandson was born on my daughters birthday...and for 9 years I held the birthday celebration at my home...I had a special cake for each...
Cheers
And what's up with the weird semi-outline on the side cupcakes?
I really think this is the worst cake I've seen before.
Poor kids...not even a little pink for the girl. They both got blue, white and barf coloured cakes.
Brianna McCarthy
Hmmm, Someone likes Jenny alot more than Vernon :<
The blue roses and white frosting are not bad, but that camo! ICK! And it's not even equal. If they're going to have the same cake they should have done it 50/50 with a matching theme, maybe blue roses for the boy and pink for the girl. I bet Vernon chose the camo though, little boys aren't exactly known for their taste!
I guess I should be happy that the cake pics you're pulling off my site are all freebies that were done when I was first starting to decorate.
Thanks Again
Jennifer aka Cake Lady @ Blue Rose Cakes
Hey, oversensitive-cake-decorator...
If you don't want the people seein' your f'ed up mistakes, then don't PUT them out there for the people to see! Logic 101, darlin'. And your feeble attempt to shame whomever submitted this photo doesn't work either. After all, you yourself are responsible for letting loose this picture into the wunnerful world of cyberspace. And deep down, c'mon, you know this be nasty, right? Riiiiighhht??? Man up, already.
Hey, oversensitive-cake-decorator...
If you don't want the people seein' your f'ed up mistakes, then don't PUT them out there for the people to see! Logic 101, darlin'. And your feeble attempt to shame whomever submitted this photo doesn't work either. After all, you yourself are responsible for letting loose this picture into the wunnerful world of cyberspace. And deep down, c'mon, you know this be nasty, right? Riiiiighhht??? Man up, already.
Okay, I can see maybe having fewer cupcakes for Vernon- maybe he had fewer people coming to the party than his sister.
But I mean, how hard would it be to get another plate and make three different "cakes"? Sorry, but vomit-camo does NOT match.
So many comments! I read the comments and saw everything I would have said was already said two or three times.
Love this blog!
The wreckerator actually has it proudly displayed on her website??!
Oh my!
Funny, but upon first viewing this, I just assumed that poor Jenny was receiving this abomination FROM Vernon--where did the twins idea start?
This is described so well and clearly, now to make our twins hate you will never be a difficulty. Thanks