Friday, October 29, 2010

Frightened Out of Their Wits

Friday, October 29, 2010

Well, let's be nice and just assume that's what happened.



The positive: they remembered to dot the "i."

The negative: there's an "i."

Tell you what, Wreckerator: if you can say it, I'll buy it.


Preeeesenting! The One Eyed, One Exploding Sprinkle Brained, Cookie Purple People Eater!

I'm pretty sure the "boo" is unnecessary. Someone hold me.



I love it when Wreckerators place a bunch of little flotsam versions of whatever the cake is supposed to be ON the actual cake. You know, like this:

It says, "yes, I know you can't tell what my cake is, and no, the candy corn CANNOT GO ON THE YELLOW OR WHITE STRIPE. What, are you crazy?"


This one actually makes sense when you realize "RIP" stands for "rest in poo."


And this one makes sense when you...uh...no. Sorry. It just doesn't make sense.


I'd like to point out that the sign next to this one says, "Candy Fun Cake."

Hm. You say "candy fun cake," I say, "pass the pumpkin pie, please."

And I don't even like pumpkin pie.



Something tells me Mr. Skeleton is a little hard up.

And how do I know he's a "Mister"?

Well...

Let's just say I have a bone to pick with this Wreckerator.


Chickpea, Brittanie R., Kara, Jessie M., Sarah W., Mary T., Elizabeth S., & Melissa S., not to be cryptic, but singing out of tomb is one grave situation. I suspect a plot rife with skulduggery.

Venkman's DogMom said...

I'm gonna disagree with you on Mister Skeleton. That is so obviously MRS. Skeleton and she is bringing Skeleton jr. into the world.

Anonymous said...

That fun cake looks like vomit.

Anonymous said...

Does that say "Where's the Candy?" under the cookie sticker? Do they mean sugar-laden food or a woman named Candy? Hmmm…

wv: brysese: the child of Anita Bryant and Martin Scorsese, who does not want any of the cakes shown here.

The Boob Nazi said...

Even ghosts get scared by spiders!

Christine said...

Love the Yorkshire spider cake (though they should, of course, spell it 'eck)

Anonymous said...

I think maybe "EKK" is the sound of the ghost laughing. It almost looks like the spider is tickling him.

Anonymous said...

Is that striped cake representing
a country in the afterworld?

I agree with Venkman... that skeleton is giving birth- now that says Halloween does it not?

Great posts.

mocking

Stella said...

HAHA. Just when I thought the laughter would stop, you have to throw in the skeleton w/limbs splayed. I really should know better. Happy Hello ween...

Danger Boy said...

Ekk! They are so frightful!
The Candy Fun Cake looks more like a deranged muppet (Dark Crystal, not Sesame Street) after an attack by a rabid badger. Maybe it's just me.

Sara said...

As an arachnophob, the spider cake makes perfect sense...even ghosts are afraid of them.

Anonymous said...

You don't like pumpkin pie???

... why do you hate America?

Donna said...

Is that spider goosing that ghost?


WV: uperam - up somewhere else, I'd say....

Classic Steve said...

What possessed them to replace the pelvis with that thing? I have little idea what it's supposed to be.

Also, I'm a little surprised not to see any "boner" jokes yet.

Alyson said...

"Also, I'm a little surprised not to see any "boner" jokes yet."

Wow! Look at that guy's...!

Happy now Steve? ;)

msyendor said...

That candycorn cake, how hard is it to stack a triangle? (oh, wait, I have to use this many CCs? OK, a lumpy triangle)

Mr.Skelly, an oversized cup isn't fooling anyone.

Ekk. Very appropriate.

Anonymous said...

Cake #1: Perhaps they spelled it like they talk?

Cake #2: Oh no you still would not buy it – it’s a CCC (patooie)!

Cake #3: I’m more curious about what it says under the sticker. Unless they warped "Where's" (because it doesn't look like there's enough space [like that ever stopped anyone though]), it could read "Want the Candy!"? OK you can have it! What it should say is “I want sprinkles!” There’s plenty!

Cake #4: What do you expect - it’s a CCC (patooie)!

Cake #5: Perfect place for those graves in the poo-mpkin patch.

Cake #6: They have it right..."Eek" is what you say when you see scary ghost and spider. "Ekk" is the sound you make when you look at this cake.

Cake #7: The mouth is up-side-down. Oooh I’ll have some pumpkin pie!

Cake #8: I’m still laughing so hard. The first thing that came to mind was dead or undead, I’d be reeeeaaaalllly happy too if I was MISTER Skeleton. Your comment and that skeleton’s face!!!!!!! [still ROTFLMBO] It's not a Mrs. - there's no way a woman (skeleton or not) smiles that much during childbirth.

Don’t worry, I can’t carry a tomb in a bucket either :(


wv: slyol: Mr. Skeleton is a slyol dog!

Squirrel said...

That last cake could have gone from fail to win if instead of trying to draw in the missing plastic pelvic bone piece they had put a jack-o-lantern in its place...but not a 3-D one, that would just be silly....

Just kidding! Nothing makes a CCC a win, NOTHING.

vw: nimplep - your fingers are so nimplep, you would make a good wreckerator

Sif said...

I'm wishing it was Hlloween all year - these wrecks are unbelievable. And thanks, Jen - my three year old now screams "Let's look for a cake wreck!!" every single time we pass the grocery store bakery.

Mary Connealy said...

I have a Halloween party Saturday night.

I'm supposed to bring something.

All I can think of is cake.

I don't think that's what my sister is going for.

jo said...

aww. those cookie ghosts were cute! so. close.

REST IN POO!! ROFLUMD (roll on the floor laughing under my desk)

That's genius.

Is it possible that MRS. Skeleton is birthing a ghost??

that purple monster's teeth are frightening! like the posters on my dentist's wall! (exploding sprinkle brains?!)

that second to last one is scary--dismembered fingers, tiny blue brains, big gaping eyes, etc. ETC.

and on #6, is the spider goosing the ghost? is that even possible?

thanks for the chuckle. Halloween wrecks are AWESOME.

Vicki said...

On #1 - HAPPy HAiLOWeeN everyone!

Blackbird said...

Anyone else think the purple thing looks like a cousin of Kang & Kodos?

Ellen said...

I'm so offended you don't like pumpkin pie that I'm NEVER coming to Cakewrecks again. EVAR!




*just kidding!*

Craig said...

#2,4,8 The attack of the CCC's! Spooy! (How quickly they forget...)

If only 'Ekk' had been spelled 'Eck', it would have been a neat Outer Limits reference.

Also on #8: The thong is forgotten, but the malady lingers on. (To heck with pun control!)

debbo said...

Happy Hlloween!!!
Happy Hailoween!!!

wv: cande
Aw, the ekk with it, just give me cande !!!!

Banana said...

Just looking at these cakes makes me want to puke!

racheld said...

Oh, Dear Heaven!!

I was just describing to DD my appalling childhood memory of MY OWN GRANDFATHER's dressing up in blackface for the local MINSTREL SHOW. Yes, it happened. Yes, I was there.

Am I scarred for life? You guess.

Candy Fun Cake. SUUUURRRE.

Anonymous said...

I would argue that "ekk" makes perfect sense. It's an obvious blend of the scared "eek" and the nauseated "ick," making "ekk" just perfect for that cake.

Anonymous said...

Love how all the ghosts look like a vacuum is trying to remove them from the cake.

On the "Happy Hlloween" cake, does that not look like bell peppers to you?

That purple people eater really looks like it'll bite anyone foolish enough to break off a piece of cookie. Truth in advertising.

Maybe the candy corn cake is "some assembly required?"

Too bad about the RIP turds, because the rest of that cake is quite pretty. But the extra fertilizer might explain why the green vine border is so robust.

The candy fun cake would be a choking hazard if anyone was brave (and stupid) enough to eat it.

That skeleton cake shows true wreckerator perseverance. There are no words, no punctuation, no border. Just a fool-proof plastic kit you place on top of iced cupcakes. *sigh*

Ekk, indeed.

Jen B said...

I think the Ghost Spider EKK cake is the Halloween version of the Sexual Harassment cake.

Meg said...

I think I'm more upset that you don't like pumpkin pie. How dare you not like the same things I like!!

Flartus said...

Let me help you out with some of your confusion. First, "Ekk" is, of course, the viewer's response to the "cake" in question.

Second, "candy fun cake" makes plenty of sense, if you simply replace the word "fun" with "poo." And actually, the word "candy," too.

See? All better now.

tiffany said...

You CAN pronounce "Happy Hlloween".

Its 'lo-ween', the 'H' is silent. HAHA.

Anonymous said...

Is the purpose of Halloween to make us feel bilious?

Kristyn said...

Am I the only one who thinks that it should be spelled "Hallowe'en" - with an apostrophe?? Maybe that's a Canadian thing?

wv: couscrom - the crumbs left over from eating couscous

Laura said...

I love your purple people eater reference! We used to watch that every Easter... I have no idea why but I think that explains a lot about who I am today.. :-|

Beckie said...

Anyone else see that ghost on the "EKK" cake doing the dance the little girl from Charlie Brown's Christmas Special does?

WV: Shinte. That Rest In Poo cake is rather shinte.

Pilgrim said...

dear God, lets get this wrecked holiday over with and move on to the wrecky turkey cakes cuz my eyes are bleeding after seeing the candy fun cake....

Nora said...

Who said "EEK"...the spider or the ghost??

Kenvee said...

...Do I see a severed toe on the front of the candy fun cake?? (Right under the red gummy worm)

Sandy A said...

OMG This set had me laughing til I was in tears!!! HAHAHAHA Thank you!

Lady Heather said...

The one is a Triple Disaster.
1 - It's a WRECK.
2 - It's a CCC (Cupcake Cake)
3 - It's a CCC (Candy Corn Cake)

Though I gotta admit, it's the cutest of the bunch.

Kelter said...

It looks like the ghost is farting on the spider....

wiesoauchimmer said...

*blinks* on the second cake, are those icing strawberries?

Christin L. said...

I hereforth demand all my cookie cakes to contain exploding sprinkley brains!

Monica said...

That purple...thing...is pure nightmare fuel. Seriously, that cake is truly frightening. That looks like something Steven Moffat would dream up for the Doctor to fight. I never was afraid of the one-eyed, one-horned, flying purple people eater until today. Thank you, anonymous Wreckerator.

wv: distabl. Seeing that cake has left me mentally distabl. Hold me.
;)

missoularedhead said...

The purple cookie eater thingamabob proves something. Sprinkles don't belong on cakes. They're brains!

Anonymous said...

Personally, I believe the purple plop is perfect... after all, it IS Hallowe'en!!

Krystyn, no, it's not a Canadian thing... it is spelled correctly with e'e. North or south of the border. Most people just drop the '.

You could just call it All Hallow's Eve, but then I'd really hate to see just what the wretched wreckerators would come up with.

I'm seriously disturbed by the 'candy' on that 'candy cake'. Night terrors will reign tonight.

~~Di

Anonymous said...

Do not taunt the Candy Fun Cake

Anonymous said...

I'll bet at least part of that skeleton glows in the dark.

BADKarma! said...

EKK!!! It's nearly HilowLLn!!!!

Brenda said...

What's more fun than browsing Cake Wrecks? Asking your 2 year old "what's that?" while browsing Cake Wreck. For the record, the purple people eater is actually a bird. I think I may have a future cake decorator!

drgns4vr said...

I thought Mr Skeleton's pelvic area was covered by an albino cockroach. With any luck I'm wrong.

Anna B said...

Here's your EPCOT. Not sure if it was intended or not, but there's a typo in your title :)

Great Post!

wv: outoin - Hope those cake aren't going outoin the sales rack for Halloween!

Janus said...

Is that a bone or a boner that you have to pick with that last Wreckorator? :)

DesertHeather said...

My four year old looked at these with me, and by the second one she was asking me, "Mommy, why do people make these weird cakes? They ARE cakes, right?" :)

Anonymous said...

Actually, the "EKK" one sorta works - it's what I would say if there were a spider on my dessert!

Merry at Annie's Book Stop

Maureen said...

OMG! I totally see the severed toe and the strawberries! (Now that's a sentence I never expected to type) I also agree that the Ekk cake is the Halloween version of the sexual harassment cake. Is it wrong that I keep thing how sad it is that they ruined perfectly good candy corn by putting in on that CCC? I love candy corn and the icing would make it soggy!

brian t said...

I think Hlloween might be in Kwa-Zulu Natal (South Africa) - somewhere between Umgungundlovu and Hluhluwe. Those Zulus sure know how to invent gnarly place names ...

Julia said...

I rather think the ghosts on the first cake rather look as though they're letting one "RiP"

Siouxzr said...

Kelter said what I was thinking. I think a gassy ghost acounts for the spider's eyes nearly bugging out.

Anonymous said...

Anyone else disturbed that the sell-by date on the candycorn CCC is January of next year?

pikkewyntjie said...

I love the Wrecky Horror Picture Show! I think the EKK cake makes perfect sense. One look and you say "EKK!"

Joanne said...

You've got to remember to warn us when we're viewing a PG-13 Wreck! My 12-year-old daughter got the giggle fits about Mr. Skeleton and the... um... play on words. :)

Anonymous said...

That white, orange, yellow cake is supposed to be oriented up and down and it's supposed to be a candy corn. Think? Maybe? It may also just mean I'm as twisted as its creator!

Ursula said...

The face on the "Candy Fun Cake" might be what the satanic alter ego of the face on the "Pink Moon" album cover looks like...

ilze said...

I didn't know that bakeries had so much black icing - in tubes, as a spray-on, etc. I suppose this holiday is their last chance to use it up.

Anonymous said...

How do these people get decorating jobs is beyond me

Arlene said...

AIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! Runs for the exit. Sheesh the poop RIP thing is bad enough but did that spider eat part of the ghost or is the ghost running away from the spider lol. Hard to tell but all these cakes scare me.

Anneke (Mudhooks) said...

Of course practically no one uses the proper spelling of Hallowe'en (short for Hallow evening). Actually, It should be All Hallow's Eve.

Barbara Anne said...

"RIP" stands for "rest in poo?" I thought it stood for "really into partying."

wtf do you mean you don't like pumpkin pie???? is that allowed??

yoko_vibe said...

Oh dear!! I've read this post three times now, and each time I get to the 'candy fun cake' I start wheezing with helpless laughter.

Christina said...

Seriously, you are some of the funniest people ever. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard...no joke. I couldn't even see at the end.

Chud said...

Happy Hlloween?

Croeso y Cymru.

Bridget Delaney said...

"Hlloween" is obviously said "yoween." It must be Spanish where H's are silent and double L's make the Y sound!