Dr. Expector Ant: "Silence! I kill you!!"
Ant minion #3: "Um. So...is now a good time to ask for a promotion?"
Ant minion #1: "Hey, where'd Spiderman Head go?"
Meanwhile, our bravely balancing brain bowl bounced his way to freedom!
With the persistent pest population handled, Spiderman Head heads home for some much-needed family time:
"Uncle Sherb?
"Da-aad! I think we brought the football in instead of Uncle Sherb again."
"Don't worry, son, we'll get him out of the yard in the morning."
Little did Spiderman Head know that his brother Sherb was NOT in the yard, but rather in the grips of the maniacal madman, Monochromatic Max!
Will our noteworthy noggin' notice his brother's absence in time?!? Or will Uncle Sherb be doomed to a colorless demise?
Tune in next week for the thrilling continuation of...
Thanks to Wreckporters Tim H., Stephanie Z., Margaret R., Carolina D., & Amy H. for helping me get ahead.
Update from john: Spiderman Head is the Amazing Spider-Man's nephew. In an act of teenage angst, he de-hyphenated his name and moved to Metropolis where he currently works with Super-Man Head.
121 comments | Post a Comment
That was hilarious! Thanks for the morning laugh.
Meg R.
Is that cookie moldy? Just ick.
So is Spiderman Head and ants a new prevalent cake design out there? These cakes are crazy...but why are the first two identical in design?
I will stay tuned for the next thrilling episode. Ba-Ba-Bum.
The cupcakes with the football kind of reminds me of that Sesame Street song - "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is not the same..." lol! Crazy!
HAHAHAHA! Dr. Expector Ant has been learning from Achmed.
"Bravely Balancing Brain Bowl" I must find a way to use this in a sentence this week.
Great post! I'm sensing an instant classic!
Dr. Expector Ant?? OMG, you just made me to a SPIT take!! LOL!!
Bonus points for the Achmed the Dead Terrorist quote!!!
Anyway, there's no spiderman head on the second cake (he escaped, remember?). I think the cake design is just "ants stealing a cupcake" and the first one just happened to be a spiderman-head cupcake...
Does it make me a geek if I read the whole thing with the movie announcer guy's voice in my head? Thanks for the laugh, you're absolutely brilliant!
Awesome!
wv: idesse. Don't give wreckerators any more bad idesse.
Kudos for the annoying, affected and awesome alliteration.
-French Bean
I enjoy the Achmed reference.
As a comic book geek I feel I must point out that Spider-man does *not* reside in Metropolis. Spider-Man patrols New York City and the surrounding environs. Superman lives in Metropolis.
After that... hilarious.
I hope this isn't another Epcot, but... isn't Metropolis the city for Superman? Spidey hearts NYC!
Love it when you tell a story using cake wrecks :)
That is some great writing! You should turn it into a comic book and release it. ;)
Teresa
simplyenduring.blogspot.com
OMG, I laughed and laughed. The first one is ants at a picnic - thank you for the second one to explain that. Why the football, did they run out of flotsam?
You know, the stories you write to connect all the wrecks really make it work. I like!
"Silence! I kill you!"
I love that Dr. Expector Ant is channeling Jeff Dunham's Achmed, the Dead Terrorist. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umpdfYuVwmQ
I kind of like the ones with the ants stealing the cupcake (not sure how Spiderman fits in, though).
I can't wait for the next installment of Spidey head. Should be worth the wait.
Monochromatic spidey is just gross. They couldn't spring for the extra icing to actually ice the ENTIRE cake? Eeeewwwww.... it makes the other ones, surprisingly, seem professional. Bodiless and all!
*slow clap*
Awesome!
I am speechless!!!! (In a good way!)
You almost made me snort Dr Pepper out my nose! This was great. :)
Who knew that Achmed the Dead Terrorist moonlighted as Dr. Expector Ant? Love the reference! Weird how Spidey heads are so popular ... *scratching head*
Love your site,
Rachel
Oh, my gosh. Those were the best names of all time! I just lol'd so much! Your attention to the little details is amazing--you're so ped-ANT-ic, in the best way psosible =D
oh the hilarity! My 4 year old loved it.
So, um, not to call you out as being less geeky than you imagined...But, Spiderman lives in New York City. Superman lives in Metropolis. Although, perhaps your point was that Spiderman Head lives in Metropolis? Anyway, it was totally hilarious. Great story.
ROFL!!!
He not only had an Uncle Sherb and Sherm, but apparently a brother Sherb as well. Who knew? And he lives in Metropolis not New York? Total weirdness haha
Jeff
This was really funny! You had me chuckling as I read this, especially the first part. That was pure genius.
However, I do feel obligated to finally point out that correctly, there's a hyphen in his name. It's really supposed to be Spider-Man. But that's just a tiny little detail.
Personally, I can't wait for the next episode of "Spider-Head!"
Spider-Head!
Spider-Head!
He's a spider and a head!
Love the Achmed the Dead Terrorist reference!
This definitely goes in my Top 5 Favorite Cake Wrecks Posts Ever!
Love the Achmed the Dead Terrorist quote - I wonder if there are any Achmed wrecks out there....hint hint...
References to Achmed the Dead Terrorist, the Waltons, and The Fly all in one post. Brilliant!
Hate the ants on the cakes. We had one at our Albertson's store. Ants on watermelon CCC. Patooie!
Sharon's Edible Art
The ants on a picnic blanket is a cute idea, but the Spiderman Head is very out of place. Either way, I love the Achmed reference! "A-C-phleeegm"
I just thought I'd let you know, Cake Wrecks brightens my day every time you post. I really enjoy this blog... and Epbot is great as well for my geeky, girly fill. :)
Thank you for doing what you do!
-Laura
Ants? On a cake. That is supposed to be eaten. Ewwwww.
The Ant comments reminds me so much of the Xanth series.
Great way to weave a story, Jen! (you got it, right - WEAVE)
BTW, Sherb transmutated to Sherm in the last paragraph. Might want to clean that up.
every post is funny. every cake is horrific. this post shows why you are a blogger on another level. Truly great humor writing and glorious display of geekiness! much love!
I like that Dr. Expector Ant is also a dead terrorist...
All the Ant words remind me of Xanth novels by Piers Anthony, a fantastic read if you got the Ant jokes! And I loved the anouncer voice, I did the same thing for my bestfriend's bachelorette party, it's a superhero theme! lol. Keep up the great work!
Gray frostiong for spiderman?
LOL, please, just don't bother next time.
I'm thinking you had A LOT of fun writing that post. I certainly had fun reading it! Nice work!
Spider-Head!
Spider-Head!
Fights a terrorist who is dead!
Lives in New York!
Not in Met-
tropolis
Yeah, you bet!
Hey, look out!
Ants stole the Spider-Head!
WV: persi - persiAN ice cream is my new favorite thing in the world! (Well, it is)
wow these cakes are simply awesome. How can anyone make cakes so beautiful
Learn Italian
Dr. Expector Ant = Achmed? Ach! Say it ain't so! Spider Man Head is in trouble!!! He might laugh to death.
Best blog commentary ever!
This is my new favorite post. It has everything: a story, multiple hilarious cakes, and a Jeff Dunham reference! Way to go, Cakewrecks! PS: Anyone else notice the irony in the fact that there is in fact a hyphen in the word "de-hyphenate"? ;)
Absolutely hilarious. Thank you for that! And to John, I love your back story. Keep up the good work!
Tina
Loved this! I won't lie the monster sized ants were just as scary as the mini spidey head.
That was hilarious, especially the Jeff Dunham reference! That's great!
The first two made me shiver with disgust.
When Uncle Sherb places his wagers at the horse track does that make it a Sherbet?
At least without a body he can't shoot webs from his crotch.
Kate Halleron, great re-working of the Spider-Man song lyrics - I love it!
I, too, appreciated the Achmed reference. I heart Achmed.
I think it is hilarious that most of the wrecks with labels come from the same company, and that company has so many stores in so many different areas of the country.....they really do not pay the bakers or cake decorators enough there LOL!
Bwahahahahaha!
Wow, the Spiderman 3 (I'm assuming that's what the 'monochromatic' SMH cookie abomination is) thing is just...yikes.
Although I DID think that the 'picnic' cake was rather well done. However it is the ONLY cake I have ever seen where plastic ants are actually placed appropriately.
I think my favorite though is the web shooting out of SMH's neck. Wow, this guy is multitalented! Or just wrecky. Yeah, probably just wrecky.
WV: Aingla--These wrecks don't look good from ANY aingla.
That was hysterical. And calls desperately for the Moxy Fruvous Spiderman Theme cover!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYh7x9UX0vI
"Spidey, the fun...licker!"
Dear Jen,
Long-time lurker, first-time commenter, but I just had to write in this time to say that this was your best post yet! The cakes were funny, but the story you invented was priceless. It was really like a morning superhero show. Thank you so much for all the laughs!
Anybody else frightened that that yucky looking giant cookie is $7.99? lol
The moldy grey spiderman head cookie is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen! We need a health inspector over here, stat!
Perfect post.
Love the reference to Achmed!! Also, all the "ant" words reminds me of Vincent Price as Egghead on the 60s Batman tv series.
I actually kind of liked the ants carrying off a cupcake. It's cute, and it's not like they are real ants, just plastic flotsom.
You are very witty and funny, but you obviously don't read the comics. Your innocent errors that everyone feels obliged to point out gave you away. It's would be like if I tried to announce a football game. "Okay, I think the smaller guy is going to throw the ball to that guy running over there . . . "
wv: trats - "Trats! Foiled Again!"
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
Finding speech difficult now, after reading entire blog to tie all these together. Good thing typing requires no air to the lungs.
If cakewrecks ever go out of style... (hoping, praying they never do) ever consider a ghost writing job for graphic novels?
TOTALLY awesome Jeff Dunham reference. Love that guy.
~~Di
brammedt - Methinks someone brammedt that Spidey guy down into the ground, so we only see his nephewhead.
It took me a while but then it dawned on me, the ants with a cupcake design is the standard design, the checkerboard patterns is the blanket. Some enterprising cake designer jammed a spidey head onto it and voila new cake
Anonymous 12:46pm said...
"I think it is hilarious that most of the wrecks with labels come from the same company, and that company has so many stores in so many different areas of the country.....they really do not pay the bakers or cake decorators enough there LOL!"
Actually those labels with the word "Bakery" inside the brown rectangle are at lots of different bakeries. I've seen them at bakeries as excellent as Publix AND as questionable as Walmart. They probably buy them from the same printing company that just changes the name on them. Might be supplied by the company that sold them the printers that spew out that list of ingredients in teeny, tiny type.
Wasn't planning to comment today until I saw that post, but since I'm here ... WHY would they have Spidy heads in the first place? Are they supposed to bake a cake that is shaped like the body and slap the head on it? I just don't understand the point at all.
Simply brilliant, Jen! Loved it!
Thanks for the laugh! (complete with coffee out the nose!)
That last one looks like the head was left outside for more than 1 night... and rotted... gross!
ROTFLMAO!! OMG...too funny Jen!
Those cupcakes & cakes wouldn't be anything buy awful without the commentary! Thanks for the laugh this morning! =)
I'm glad to see that Spiderman Head and Superman Head are not divided down the Marvel/DC line. Unlike Superman and Spider-Man in this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av6fWfmugds
Think that the gross cookie is supposed to be Venom, not Spidey.
The Chocolate Chip Clossal (!) Cookie at the end: Spidey Head or Achmed? I can't tell. Especially through my tears of laughter.
I used to just love this site... Now I also really REALLY love YOU. This was indeed the most amusing and epic thing I've been exposed to in months. Go Spider-head!
Donna M.
Great post as usual but as someone who lives inside comic books I must say, Spiderman doesn't look after Metropolis, that's Superman. Spiderman just protects plain old New York.
:)
agrees, great post! So much cleverness! Now I am motivated to scour my city for other decapitated superheros and villains lurking on frosted treats.
I should have known you are a Jefuhfuh Dunhaaaaam fan!! :)
There actually is an Antman in the Marvel universe (sometimes). He doesn't have ant powers, but he can get ants to do stuff for him (He can also change his size and do science). I wonder what Spidey did to make him so mad.....
OMG! Hilarious post!
EVEN BETTER (and I'm a computer idiot so I can't get a screen shot of it to share) is that Google Ads has a Terminex ad up on the left hand side of the page (at 1:30 pm CST). Love it!
Very clever angle; I enjoyed it! As for that last exhibit...eww. The black dye seeped into the cake and the pukey gray icing made me shudder. Blekh, who's gonna eat that?
Wait, I just have to add that my word verification for this comment is..wait for it..."antene!"
Maybe I'm strange, but I think the ant cakes are cute. Very funny post too.
I don't think Spiderman needs a hyphen. It's his last name. Peter Spiderman. It's a time-honored Yiddish name, dontcha know.
- Anne
I love you.
That is all.
I think I'm going to be sick...
Great story! Hilarious episode. and @drumnate who said...
"At least without a body he can't shoot webs from his crotch."
ROFL! good point! nor can he cavort with superman. much....
Spiderman in Carbonite?
lol I love you stories
Expector Ant. Lolz
LOL Made me snicker and smile. Thanks! :D
This just made me smile. Love the blog!
hahaha u crack me up! thanx for the daily laughs :)
I just discovered your blog today (through the recommendation of another blogging friend - thank goodness for her!) Awesome! So funny, maybe I do have a future as a cake decorator. At least a kinda bad one! :)
I hate being corrected but... Spiderman is from New York City. Superman is from Metropolis. I'm sorry for correcting. I love this site. I check it everyday.
bwahaha those are great
Spiderman doesn't live in Metropolis. He couldn't even go visit there, because he's from the Marvel Universe and Metropolis (Superman) is the DC Universe. *cough cough i married a nerd and it's rubbing off on me cough cough*
Love your website!
I laughed so hard at this post, but "BUM BUM BUUUUMMM" really cracked me up because clearly poor old Spidy Head doesn't have one, let alone three. That lovely mutation (three buttocks) is reserved for guys in obscure Monty Python skits.
ha ha ha...Love it!Super creative and so funny! How in the world did you find so many spidy-head cakes? Are there headless spidey bodies floating around? lol
Spiderman's disembodied head... has moved to Metropolis... his brother has turned monochromatic and gone mouldy... yeah, it all makes perfect wrecky sense.
But ants.
ANTS FFS!
They make my spidy senses tingle, and not in a nice way.
Use maggots, faeces, rats, anything but ants.
is Dr. Expector Ant the gut to call when you need to hack up a loogie for a CCC?
I really do love whenever you act out these little scenarios :D seriously, they just make me snerk all over the place with glee.
I really needed that laugh today. Genius, pure genius!
Love the Achmed reference!
Actually, that second cake was pretty cool. I'm just sayin'...
The rest of them, however...
WV: Precew... "Isn't that prec... uh... Ewwwwww!"
same spider-head time, same spider-head place
Favorite. Post. EVER!!!! The commentary reaches awesome-ness of epic proportions.
Max! Maximus! Max the Magnificent! Maxaroni!
The decorative uses of mold. Now there's a topic I would like to see remain buried forever (as that cookie apparently has been).
Are Spiderman heads now going to start turning up in random locations across all of wreck-creation?
"This cake design is just too understated and tasteful. It needs something... I know...! I'll put a Spiderman head right there! I can see it now: 'Happy Birthday, Amber, from My Little Pony -- and Spidey!'"
What princess-themed party would not be improved (and emptied) by the impromptu appearance of a disembodied super hero head. The possibilities are endless (or will no doubt seem so if this catches on).
By the way, could someone please create a giant 'Raid' cake? I see more than enough ants this time of year as it is -- this 'ants as wreckorations' kick really needs to stop. Now.
Considering what happened to Spidey when Batman and Superman were on that last wreck I think he's having a much better time lol. Those wreckerators really know how to destroy superhero cakes.. honestly did someone bring one of these to them when they were kids? Then they decide to take vengence on the rest of us. Tragic that lol.
Ants on cakes makes me shudder slightly - just so so wrong!!
This one is definitely a CW classic! Brilliant job stringing together disparate Spiderman-esque wrecks into a tale of humour and woe.
And John's note was the perfect finale :)
The gray Spider-Man head looks like the Millennium Falcon.
That last cake... Oh my. At first, I thought how terrible that the black coloring they used bled into the cake. Then I realized I wasn't giving the wreckerator enough credit.
Look closely at the unevenness of the "gray" icing. There are spots that are WHITE!!!
Could they have possibly decorated with white and then AIRBRUSHED the design with gray???? The mind boggles. Pure wrecky goodness!
I wonder what Spidey did to make [Antman] so mad.....
Maybe Spidey tried to eat him? Insects are spiders' natural prey, after all...^_^
I am NOT going to ask what they used for icing on that ginormous Spidey Head cookie. Spider bukkake is just too oojy to contemplate.
This commentary was fantastic! The cakes themselves were pretty wrecky (who thought a disembodied Spiderman Head was a good idea?), but your commentary really makes this post a classic.
That was the best Spidey Cartoon I've seen in a while! Awesome!
There are tears in my eyes from mirth. I think the first pic is my new desktop wallpaper. Thank you.
I made the mistake of reading this at work, just before I had to take a phonecall. I think I convinced them that my gutteral snorts were just a bit of a cold. Amazing. Thankyou.
Ugk, the last cookie looks like the frosting was added to cover some hideous mould! D:
All of you out there
in RadioLand: Spidey
Needs You! Buy Head Cakes!