1) Ice the cake, and
2) sell it.
See, actually decorating a cake requires time and effort, and therefore is discouraged where possible. To help bakers achieve this lofty goal, a few enterprising companies (we're not naming any names here....except for that one in the title, of course) are manufacturing all-inclusive instant "decorating" kits.
Here's an example:
Cute, huh? As you can see, plastic is SO in right now. Not only does it save on frosting, but it also allows anyone with the skills of a semi-trained monkey to "decorate" a cake. It's foolproof! All you need is a rounded lump frosted brown, and you're good to go - just stick the plastic bits in! Who could possibly mess that up?
[sigh]Alright, Wreckerators, now you've actually got me curious: Can you possibly make this look any worse?
Wow. I'm impressed. This looks just like the carpet adhesive we put down last Spring.Now how about something for the cat lovers haters out there?
From this...
From this...
To this!
- Related Wreckage: Going to the Dogs
|
178 comments | Post a Comment
That's the happiest roadkill I've ever seen. And I've seen some happy roadkill!
when serving the last CCCWreck:
"roadkill, anyone?"
Re: flat cat
Cue nuffers from Cute Overload in 3....2....1....
Is it just me, or do those look like they are either road-kill or some twisted pet-skin rug?
The cat looks like road kill, and the first dog ccc looks more like a rubber chicken with a dog head in it's crotch! Yummmy.
either is those are roadkill (with a happy grin on their face) or there needs to be a naked baby lying on the the backs of those wrecks.
the trained monkeys need more training!
For the kitty cake - two words: road kill
ok, assuming a charitable overhead view, I'll say the obvious - those have to be the fattest cats and dogs i've ever seen.
Not assuming the charitable overhead view... some psychopath is going around on a rampage with a skinning knife (and the happy faces on the pets do nothing but to make this all the more disturbing)
Smiling roadkill -- what a way to start the day!
Oh my goodness . . . that cat looks like roadkill!
Wow. It's like you're eating cake AND roadkill, all in one!
I think I saw something like that last one on the side of the road last week during my bike ride. Good. Heavens.
Lawsy! That cat resembles road-kill. How appetizing! Yetch.
The cat looks like roadkill... :-P
The demo cakes are cute. The others look like road kill with a smile.
WV: propla: Someone needs to teach the "decorators" the propla way to use the plastic kits!
Just what I need... a cat-skin cake rug for in front of the fireplace. If only there was a half naked man on it... THEN we'd be talking!
My first thought was that they looked like they got pinned down for dissection (especially poor Tabby). Does that make me a sick person?
WV: croquis: When your beloved pet croquis, you can turn him into a science project.
Tracy O
Looks like road kill !
that cat looks like roadkill :(
They totally look like roadkills :o
It looks like it was run over by a steam roller!
Roadkill in icing...
These cakes remind me of "What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?" when Bette Davis serves an invalid Joan Crawford what appears to be ground rat... KCN
Roadkill . . . it's what's for cake!
Would it be awful to say that when my cats sprawl they kinda look like that last cake...?
*tilts head*
just a teeny weeny bit...?
They look like road kill :(
Actually, I think the regular cakes with the plastic dog and cat faces are kinda cute. Sure, the decorator was lazy, but at least I wouldn't mind serving one of them at a kid's birthday. The CCCs are just... horrible and slightly scary...
The first way they went wrong was to try and translate a cake into the dreaded, awful, why was it ever invented CCC. That can only lead down the path to despair, destruction, and cake-wreckistry!
That last cat looks like it got ran over by a steam roller. I had total Saturday morning cartoon flashbacks, AWESOME!
WV: masking - wow I got a real word
I think those Decopac things are a great idea... for home bakers. Real bakeries, not so much.
Though, the grocery store bakeries a lot of these monstrosities come out of barely qualify as real bakeries.
they look like roadkill. Just the festive message they were going for, I'm sure.
The last kitty looks like road kill! aaahhhh!
Wow.. I didn't realize that dog and cat skin rugs were in style.
The wreckorators must not own pets or they would know that no living cat or dog can achieve this position in the real world.
I think those are the most offensive CCC's to-date.
The CCC dog & cat look like flattened roadkill. Ugh!
That dog looks like he's been run over by a steamroller ala Tom and Jerry. Poor thing! LOL.
Wow! Those cakes look like, um, roadkill. Not exactly the effect I think you want in a cake.
Who knew road kill could be so appetizing? [/sarcasm off]
Ack! Road kill cat!!
OK, I know these are words of shame - but the original cakes are a little cute. Not 'decorated' by any stretch of the imagination, but cute.
But, oh my, what was done with the concept....
The cat looks like road kill.
Ohhhhh.....my favorite road kill cat!!!
Holy cow, that last one looks like inexplicably happy roadkill!
I dunno, the display cakes are not that bad. I'm guilty of decorating my daughter's birthday cakes with what you call "plastic flotsam" because I really have no cake decorating skills whatsoever, beyond frosting a sheet cake and sticking some toy fairies or something on it. (She loved that cake!)
The CCC versions are horrifying though!
They look like they have been run over! That is so bad!
I'm sorry I ran over your dog. To prove how much I love dogs, I stopped and picked up this cake for you. (Scraping cake off face...) What? You didn't like it?
Truely terrifying!
I caught my two-year-old saying cupcake cake pagh! today. Yep, another fan of your site is born.
The cat looks like he cat hit by a semi.
Mmmmm.... road kill.
SharonCville
BWAAAAa HHAAAAA HAAAAAA! Poor kitty. :)
i'm on my way to judge some of the entries at our state fair...I SURE hope I don't see anything like this. LOL!
To everybody,
I woke up late and just now did comments thus the repeats. Sorry.
To those calling the displays cute,
Yup.
john (so sleepy)
Not only cheating by using plastic decorations, but the dreaded CCC, as well!
I still confuses me how you can go from a round cake to a CC and still think it looks good!
The sample cakes, total cheats though they may be, are actually pretty darn cute. Leave it to wreckorators to out-idiot the idiot-proof cuteness.
WV: derice - After reading Cake Wrecks while eating risotto, Claudia had to derice her computer screen.
they just need to put some tire marks across the basks and it would be much more realistic.
Mmmmm - squished pets!
*sigh* why are they all CCCs? Why can't bakeries just admit defeat in this area, and stop with the CCC madness? Because these, as Taylor said, do indeed look like happy roadkill...
"Mommy, that kitty's napping with Jesus!"
Who wants to EAT a cat or a dog?!?! The decopack designers need to think of things that are appealing to eat. Giant strawberry? Sure. Big fake hamburger that's actually cake? Cute idea! A big flower pot with fake dirty and gummy worms? Ok.
But a cat and/or a dog!?
And cat or dog roadkill is even worse, obviously.
Both my cat and my dog are horrified at these CCCs (ptuooi!) However, truth be told, my dog flattens himself out with one leg behind him, so he can kind of resemble the first two. Not quite so flat though. And only when wearing a halloween mask.
WV-curylver - license plate for a Indian food fan.
For some reason, I REEEAALLLYY have to go pee now.
Hahah...OMG. Remember those roadkill cafe t-shirts? It reminds me of that. That flattened kitty would make another good T-shirt.
Cat-skin and dog-skin rugs - so trendy!!!
Urp.
All I see looking at those is some poor cartoon cats & dogs that ran off a cliff and went SPLAT, Wil E Coyote-style.
Oh, the imfamous plastic junk on cakes...how I detest them !
However, I must admit the sample cakes are kinda cute !
That last one is very cat-skin rug. Eeks.
They look less like cute little animals and more like dead animal rugs. Uck!
I'll be charitable and assume the wreckerators did not intend to produce a tribute to road-kill, but rather are perspective-challenged - 3-dimensional figures appear two-dimensional. I sometimes run into this problem when teaching 6th-graders the difference b/w a square and a cube in Math. Well, if I have really sloooowwww 6th graders. Most of 'em figure it out right away. As could the average monkey, trained or untrained. Not that I'm comparing 6th graders to monkeys, or anything. I'm comparing these wreckerators to 6th graders AND monkeys. And yes, that frosting is reminiscent of industrial adhesive. Yum, yum.
Oh, and terri s - please don't give these people any more ideas about naked babies on baked goods! "Hey, just what this needs - a naked baby! That'll make it perfect!"
I have four resident cats (only two of them mine, so no, I am not the Crazy Cat Lady....yet) and at least three of them are capable of adopting this posture. One of them, as a matter of fact, seems to enjoy sleeping that way. But then again, he always was a little strange.
However, when a cat smiles like that, I immediately start searching the kitchen for missing food items, or the rest of the house for inexplicable acts of destruction. Smiling cat=danger!
The second one looks like a dog from behind, but then WHAT? There is a head coming from the dogs butt?!
how is no one not noticing the "tire tread marks" on the second puppy wreck? and to have the tongue sticking out to boot! LMAO!
to be fair, my 18 month old correctly identified them as Dogs and kitty cats.
(dear God PLEASE don't ruin Cake Wrecks by referencing Cute Overload and their unbelievably annoying lingo, I beg of you...)
The road kill cat is perfect: that is if it's Alf's birthday.
Yeah, as nearly 2/3 of the people mentioned. the cupecakes look like road kill. But I have never seen happier roadkill. Three times overdriven by trucks?! No problem!!
Always look on the bright sight of life *sings*
Honey? Is that a cake, or the rug from Aunt Suzie's den?
Gah. Who takes the time to iron their dogs any more, anyway?
omg it looks like roadkill
No no, these are important "Congratulations on your operation" cakes.
Spay and neuter your animals!
It's a cat / dog pancake!
sigh...
:'(
I am going to name this cake "happy cat"
That was more than a little disturbing. Seriously.
Or cat and dog rugs.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
I have an overwhelming urge to buy one of these disasters and drop it off at the nearest PETA office.
WV: remedish - a drug that doesn't quite cure what ails you.
And what's better - some will actually think it's cute.....
Cupcake cakes are a sin against reality.
Nothing says "I love cats" like stretching one out like a cat skin rug!
LOL!!! i think the icing color on the flattened dog looks like what was in my kids' diapers when they were infants.......yellow, seedy, poo. eww.
Road kill is the first thing that comes to mind. Bleh.
I am throughly relieved to discover that nearly every one of the comments left here agree that these things look like ROADKILL. So not appealing.
And the carpet adhesive remark? Dead on. (Pun intended) I work for flooring contractors, let me tell you, the sight or smell of freshly scraped carpet adhesive is NOT appealing on or around food products. Ick Ick Ick.
Mmmmm flayed dog, just what I've always wanted to eat on my birthday...
Has anyone noticed the CCCCC (crushed cat cupcake cake) has a detached tail?! It's like the "decorator" subconsciously realized the cat was toast and added that detail to enhance the effect.
oH!!!! That cat was the best! HAHAHAHAHA!!!
Wow, it looks like someone ran them over.Twice. But at least they are happy.
All I can do is echo everyone else. Roadkill Cafe!
~Amy B
Two words: steam. roller.
Roadkill! Ha! It's genius.
i think that rocks! it's hilarious!
Had I been drinking anything when I saw that cat-wreck, my monitor would need a good cleaning. Whatinthehell???
That cat looks like a Mack Truck ran it over (but it looks happy about it!)
Did anyone else notice the little sticker on the sample cat that says, "For display only. Not for consumption?" The wreckarators must have taken that quite literally and made something that no one would want to eat!
that second cat totally looks like OUR cat on a hot summer day.
That cat is sure sporting some freakishly long arms!
That cat is AWESOME did someone run him over???
There are few things worse than all the ways wreckerators are able to totally screw up the pictures in the book. I don't even know why bakeries offer the example books. Excited parents, lovers and friends pick out cakes from those books, expecting an adorable confection. And it always comes back looking globby, awkward and poopie.
that looks like roadkill
That last one is definitely a cake for someone who doesn't like cats. Whoa.
I don't think anyone's mentioned this yet, but those CCC's kinda look like roadkill. Or rugs.
I'm so funny.
*headdesk*
Specialty cakes from Heinlein Bakeries. The Martian Flat Cats. And now Martian Flat Dogs.
Drop the masks and you've got Tribbles.
Poor kitty looks like roadkill.
Second ccc doggy looks like he's skidding across the kitchen floor to rid himself of some butt visitors.
They both look like they've been flattened by a zamboni.
The CCCs look like roadkill. Eeeewww!
Road Kill anyone? All you need is some of the goo from inside those fetus cupcakes...
When I was in school we did actually have to skin a cat in anatomy class (don't ask why, I don't remember it's been a loooooong time). The last one is exactly like I remember it looking. Except for the huge smile.
WV: summe - heard over and over in bakeries everywhere. "you don't like your cake. so summe."
Ah, it looks like those CCCs need this!
http://blog.rednecklaughs.com/2008/07/22/roadkill-helper/
(not related to this, but to the link, at one of those gag gift white elephant Christmas parties a gal that was a vegetarian got that as the gift!)
I think bakers don't realize how easy it is to make a round cake by now . . . you know, just use a METAL MIXING BOWL as the cake pan. I guess they think they don't exist . . .
Bridget from Associated Content
http://www.associatedcontent.com/bridgetidelaney
And the interview, which Jen DOES have linked as well: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1859755/interview_with_jen_yates_blogger_behind.html
That last dog CCC pic looks like a puppy is being born. (tail up, legs down, puppy coming out! LOL
Yuck!
Jen, have you ever seen a cute CCC? I don't recall if you have ever posted a sunday sweets with only CCC's, is it possible or am I asking for too much?
wow! i wonder what would a cake look like that said, "i hate dogs" or "i hate cats"?
SPLAT! Why is he still smiling?
Nothing says Party like a Road Kill cake!
These cakes look like my cat when she sleeps on the pavement in Texas in August. Splat cat!
I am counting the hours until I can go buy the soon-to-be bestseller "Cake Wrecks."
wv: diserpr. What happens when a cat gets run over. It diser-purrs
umm. eew.
Wow! Gross. Dead cat under my tire anyone?
http://confessions-of-a-waitress.blogspot.com/
Double N said...
Is it just me, or do those look like they are either road-kill or some twisted pet-skin rug?
________________________________
Pet-skin rug is EXACTLY what came to my mind! Dear LORD!!
I have recently discovered your blog, and I have fallen in love with it. I find myself laughing at the cakes gone horribly wrong. I now find myself totally against the CCC.
Anyone reminded of the Lee Evan's sketch about the policeman telling the civilian about their dog being run over? Ha ha ha! Love these!
Yeah...well, you asked for it.
Anyway...
What I want to know is how does that other place have the audacity to charge $19 for the same crap that goes for $13 at WalMart?
Oh, wait--I see that the first one has employed the use of more cupcakes than the second one does (wider hips and front legs on the dog---not to mention the fancy INSCRIPTION)...SO worth the extra 6 bucks.
The best thing to do with something like this?
OUT in the middle of the road with it! NOW! Just flop it down there and WALK AWAY. Do not look back.
Let someone else deal with calling the road crew/game warden/animal control.
See? I didn't *say* it...
=^><^=
Love the cat CCC!
I call him... Splatty!
I LOVE the cat one! I'm cat lover, but that is still hilarious!!! He looks SO run over!
Those cupcake cakes remind me of animal rugs. I think someone should mail one to PETA.
Splat Cat!!!
Should I feel bad for actually thinking this is adorable?
I hope those animals recover from their elephantitis soon.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!! AAAHHHHHAAAAA!!!! I haven't laughed out loud in a long time. I was like, Oh no, they did NOT put that plastic stuff on a CCC. Oh my!!!! Hahahahaa! Thanks! This one is so great!
yeah i definitely read "Blame Ipecac". different but also relevant.
Yikes! Unbelievable.
where I live, these plastic "decorations" are placed on tiny cakes (around the size of those first-birthday cakes) that are smaller than the plastic part, leaving the plastic part to hang over the edges.
OMG! SQUISHED DOGGIES AND KITTIES!! LMAO!
I was thinking the same thing about adhesive - gosh, that looks exactly like when we did our floor last year... oh, you're supposed to eat it... ummm, welllll...
Actually, that first one isn't too bad from an identification point of view. It looks remarkable similar to the dog vomit slime mold, Fuligo septica....
I wouldn't want those CCC's. They look like pet roadkill. Unless I want to give my kid a visual, no words needed description of why Fido isn't coming home, I'll pass.
The bundt cakes are too cute for words, though. :)
Imagine my horror when I opened up my new, most favorite blog, Cake Wrecks, to see THE VERY CAT CAKE THAT MY 7-SOON-TO-BE-8-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER HAS PICKED OUT (OFF GOOGLE)FOR ME TO MAKE FOR HER PARTY NEXT WEEK!!!! I've been agonizing for days about how to "un-wreck" it into something I won't be ashamed to say I made! And she will not be swayed in her choice. And now YOU'RE TAUNTING ME!!! waaaaa.
Um, yea my niece had one of those cat ccc for her birthday!
I misread "decopac" as "epicac". Could work either way, really.
RecoveringActor...
That has to be the best comment on here. :)
And it totally has to be a Tshirt on here now. Or a spoofed Wreck.
Good heavens... that last one looks like happy roadkill.
Oh. I see I'm not the only one who saw that!
don't all club me at once but there is something sort of adorable about the little lumps of badly frosted cake with the plastic on them ... in a sort of demented adorable sense. I actually laughed out loud and scared the cats when I saw those CCC abominations ... and I know a sh*t ton of rich house wives who LOVE that sort of thing. As a decorator - it makes me want to die. lol.
A true testament that CCCs should be. banned. forever.
wv: crous - these CCCs look like something only crous would appreciate.
I love how the last cat looks like roadkill. *lmao*
And I must admit, when you asked how someone could possibly screw up the decorating by using plastic bits, I instantly thought, "why, they could put the bits on a CCC." *lol*
WV: sunvok: I'm going to the beach this weekend and I'd better remember my sunvok.
goodness, I suck at the WV thing. *lol*
LMAO That is too funny Marthka.
I LOVE how they all still have the tails stuck on the ends.
Bwaaaahahahahahahaha! Ha!
Blessings,
C~
Mmmm, tasty, sugary, fluffy roadkill. With a plastic head!
OMG - I just blogged recently about the "dead cats" we use to teach with - now I could use iced versions!!!
Look though this post to see our roadkill cat versions!
http://fourpawsandwhiskers.blogspot.com/2009/08/ethics-and-use-of-animals-in-research.html
Those cakes are mental. I feel like the people who make such monstrosities must be from another dimension.
Isn't that Garfield in his splashed on the car window pose?
Lol for the last cake. Cat can kill hahaha. =D
Summer
A Writers Den
Brown Mestizo
Road kill cat has made my day!!
Amazing!!
That cat looks like a self-satisfied animal-akin rug. *Shudders*
Oh my goodness. I've been lurking for a while, but I just had to say something today. And that something is...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
That last one (the cat) looks like thrilled road kill.
"Kitty is SO happy he was hit by a bus!" *snicker*
Good. I hate Golden Retrievers!
OH NOES!!!!!!!
The tail on the dog looks like a little dildo party favour.
Of course its going to look bad, its a CCC, plus it was not made to be a CCC... This makes me ashamed to have been a grocery store decorator!
I think the cat is roadkill, and the dogs seriously need to go on a diet.
OMG i saw the dog at my local store when i was picking up my astronomy project that had made out of cake. I thought OMG i have to take a picture of that for cake wrecks but i really need to get to astronomy with this project so i can woo my teacher with sugar.
So if i saw it at my local walmart and several other people did to that means that it was an instructed wrecks so i guess walmart hates cake and doesn't want you to buy any ever
Short on party food?
Roll up that old shag and voila!
Carpet adhesive!
When I was looking at this with my 3 year old son in the room, he saw that first flattened dog & asked me, "Is that a dog who pee-peed?" I think he just recognized the face and a big spreading puddle of yellow.
That poor roadkill kitty!
I wish they wouldn't manufacture these stupid plastic cake decorating products anymore! You summed it up perfectly Jen when you said, "it also allows anyone with the skills of a semi-trained monkey to "decorate" a cake."
This is what happens when executives run the world and treat artists like sub-human liabilities. (I speak from experience)
I think I just died a little inside.
Running Vista with IE 8 and everything looks just great! I even rhymed a little just now, lol. =)
Welcome to the roadkill cafe! Table for one!!
The cat looks a bit freshly run over, but at least using cupcakes is practical for a party. After a few are pulled out, it wouldn't look so bad.
Sorry but this one cat reminds me of the bumper sticker that says "If you have lost your cat, look under my tire"!!!
All I can think about is those yummy cupcakes!
Mommy, mommy, they hit Scruffy!
How to make a roadkill cake:
1. Make the body out of cupcakes and frost them.
2. Order face and tail from Decopac.
Simple.