Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Party Like It's 1999

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Well, it's New Year's Eve, and that means you've got two things on the brain right now: dieting and booze. Since it's somewhat difficult to find cakes celebrating diets (which is really a shame; I'm holding out for the "all cakey carbs" diet) let me see what kind of alcohol-themed stuff I can dig up for you.

Ok, here's a dreaded CCC (cupcake cake) for the martini lover: definitely shaken, not stirred.

Uh, this looks more like a bottle of hair tonic than alcohol. (Not that I've ever *seen* a bottle of hair tonic, of course; I just imagine it would look like this.) Sorry, I'll keep looking.

Hm. Well, John and I are still debating just what the heck this is, but I think it might be an exploding champagne bottle. (John sees one of those holiday crackers that you pull open.) The one thing we both agree on is that it's butt-ugly. [evil grin]

Moving on...

Very, uh, "creative". Can you picture the conversation that led to this cake order?

"We need a cake for Bob."
"Ok, what does he like?"
"Beer."

I have a friend who used to drink orange juice with his chocolate cake, but I'm pretty sure even he would agree that drinking beer with cake is just wrong. Blech.

And while we're on the subject, let me wrap up with a little PSA: folks, tonight when you're out partying, please think of others. Please, don't drink and decorate. Don't let this happen to you or someone you love:

[shaking head sadly] Granted, it was considerate of the wreckerator to provide little bottles of "blur vision"for those unfortunate souls who will have to EAT the cake, but that hardly excuses the drunken airbrush weaving, the gold and purple shoelaces, or the [closing eyes] margarita candles. Not to mention the mystery foam, construction-paper lettering, or bizarre green-striped chocolate "ladies". Yikes. So remember: this New Year don't get mad, get C.L.A.D.D. (Cake Lovers Against Drunk Decorating).

By the by, I verified that this was indeed listed on a "professional" bakery's website. A website which, oddly enough, is no longer operational. Go fig.

Hey Jason T., Lynn B., Corianna L.,Kati B., and Marnie P.: if you didn't come to party, don't bother knockin' on my door.
Anonymous said...

I'm thinking the white on top is another female form?? The whole cake is a bit confusing for me.

Deborah Godin said...

I think that orange one is a bomb. Not da bomb..a bomb

Anonymous said...

On the last cake, is the "white foam" a lady or am I seeing something totally different?

Anonymous said...

I don't think that's mystery foam - I think it's a white chocolate naked lady laying on her back with one leg dangling over the side of the cake. Am I crazy or does anyone else see it?

-Christie

Cal said...

"mystery foam" = lounging naked lady (white chocolate mold?)

Resa said...

I think that mystery foam is in fact, another naked lady.

Sigh... I think I need a drink

Raisin'Cookies said...

Did Cake Wrecks actually BRING DOWN a professional cake decorator's website? Because that would be awesome. Name 'em, shame 'em, close 'em down!

Happy 2009 to all Cake Wrecks lovers!

Stressfactor said...

I hate to say this but the "Mystery Foam" on the last cake is also in the shape of a... uh... lady (using that term loosely... heh... loose lady... I made a funny!).

Stressfactor

John said...

Hi. Regarding that "mystery foam", I think if you look closely you'll begin to see what is (I think) the form of a woman, reclining, with one leg draped over the side of the cake, the other with knee bent (as if that foot were resting upon the edge of the cake). And then there are the two round "projections". Need I describe what they might be? "But," you say, "what about the head?" Well, apparently, that seems to have melted, or got bashed in by an errant finger. That someone actually had the cajones to publish this photo on their website speaks volumes about not only their talent but (more important) their taste. Hideous. Truly, deeply, painfully hideous.

Logical Libby said...

I think the second one was most likely a very special order for a jug band party...

morkus said...

No beer with cake? Whaaaaa?

You clearly just haven't been introduced to the right beer. Certainly, serving Budweiser with cake would be filthy. But there are any number of chocolate/coffee based stouts and porters which would do a good job.

Dogfish Head, a smallish brewery based in Delaware, sells a barley wine which would probably go fabulously well with the right kind of cake.

It's just a matter of finding a drink rich enough to go with a food like cake.

Meghan said...

I must admit, as far as CCC's go, the martini glass really isn't that bad. In fact it's kind of cute.

Wait, what are you doing?! Don't take my Cakewreck Lover license away! No! Noooo!

Malibu Niki said...

Cupcakes decorated to look like cocktail olives. How, um, appetizing.

thecottonwife.com said...

Hey - I don't think the cooler is all that bad (well, maybe if an amateur made it). It even has condensation!

Anonymous said...

The "mystery foam" is actually a lady in repose. Her legs are hanging over the edge of the top cake.

Vashti said...

Ok so what the heck is number 3??? I just cant figure it out either....maybe its a firework??
it is so ugly its crazy.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Anonymous said...

Annnnd the 'foam' on top appears to be a reclining, naked woman.
Ewwwwwww.

Laura said...

Well, the "martini" might have looked decent with only 1 olive....

Afuna said...

The first one is actually kind of cute!

Should I hang up my Wreckerator badge now?

BethNoir said...

The "foam" is a white chocolate "lady" in repose...

Beth said...

While the beer cake was definitely wierd, I think it was put together really well! Looks good! (on the surface anyway!)

j said...

The "mystery foam" on that last one appears to be another "lady"--albeit one with some anatomical issues.

Kelli (and Brad) said...

I think the mystery foam on top is a chick. I see a leg dangling down the cake, another propped up and I think you might have missed the opportunity for a black bar where her boobies are. Although, it did take a few minutes for me to see that, so it might not exist...

Middle Aged Woman said...

That's not mystery foam, that's a white-chocolate naked lady!

Tabitha (From Single to Married) said...

I'm with you - the "champagne bottle" is just awful! As is the purple cake at the end - please tell me no one actually ate that! :)

Rebecca said...

That last one is likely to only get eaten AFTER the celebrations are over, you need something, anything to get you going and you can't see straight.
Also, everything else in the room will look just like this by now so it will look much more appealing....unlike now where it just looks like throw up.
:)

pixiepants said...

Uh... sadly I don't think that is "mystery foam"... unless my 9-month-pregnant-brain is making up for something by seeing inappropriate shapes... I *believe* that is a misshapen naked chick with one knee up and head thrown back. (Now I kind of want it to go back to being mystery foam!)

PS - love this blog...

knittinandnoodlin said...

Ever drank a Guinness with a slice of Guinness cake?

I think that is the one exception to the rule that beer and cake do not go together. I wouldn't have believed it...but there is something about the barely sweetened icing, the richness of the cake, and that beer that really works.

Also, I love the martini CCC.

Mella said...

I'm with John on the identification of the mysterious cake.

happy new year to all of you .

Still 8 hours left for me

AmyAnne said...

Good God, you make me laugh everyday! The last one was hilarious! I can't imagine why they weren't successful. Maybe they needed to have a location closer to one of the trailer parks I grew up in. Location, location, location...

I have forwarded your sight on to my friends and family. I have them all on the hunt for a wreck to send in.

I might have a few of my own if I took pictures...lol.

Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I have to agree that the CCC looks better than most. At least the shape lends its self to olives and the piping looks like it was done with love.

Upupaepops said...

all cakey carbs" diet


Carrot Cake IS a complete and balanced diet

carrot veg
raisin fruit
butter fat
cream cheese frosting dairy
walnuts legumes
flour grains

What is not to love??

babies optional

Craig said...

I love that the "Celebrate" bottle looks less like champagne and more like a moonshine jug. Perfect for a Redneck New Year's party.

A Christmas Craker or champagne? I thought it was a pineapple.

So, was the last cake for a strip club?

Anonymous said...

Oh, yeah...that foam on top is definitely a female form in seductive pose...

Hair tonic? I thought it was a dreidel.

joyce said...

I bet she is made of white chocolate, but who wants a piece?

Feisty Irish Wench said...

I like for my food to resemble something edible and it's preferred that it be visually appealing. Those creations are very much a WTF?

word verf: funtede - the promise that fun will be guaranteed. You'll love partying with us here at Purple Haze, you have our FunTede!

Laggin said...

I think number 3 is a pineapple?!?

Doc said...

The orange cake looks like a blast-ended skrewt to me.

Anonymous said...

Um...I think I kinda like that beer cake, too...something about it is kind of impressive...well done in its own weird way!

Lexi said...

I agree with one of the earlier commenters...the martini wouldn't be as bad with just one olive.

The last one, though...ugh. C'mon to the party palace! Throw up before you start drinking!

Jennifer Foster said...

Happy New Year Jen!

Agatha said...

Jeeze guys, haven't ya ever had beer cake? Or is this some sort of redneck tradition? Well, ok, I've never made beer cake with bud. But trust me when I say that generally speaking beer cake is quite deeeeeelicious.

Jamie said...

Ha, these are GREAT! And yeah, I think that is a woman on top of that hideous cake :-)

HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone...have lots of booze and cake and BE SAFE ;-)

Michelle said...

I saw a holiday cracker in that orange and poiple mess. I could be convinced it is exploding champagne.

As for the strip club cake? Suitably tacky for the venue?

VW: strina - as in I'll need some Li-strina after tasting any of those cakes!

Bonnie said...

Happy New Year everyone! While I'm glad we're shutting the door on 2008, I'll always be grateful to it for bringing me CAKE WRECKS!!!!

Remember, friends don't let friends decorate cakes after consuming great quantities of alcohol...at least, not without taking pictures of it afterwards...

Here's to a fantastic 2009 with the Wreckiest wrecks EVER!

~Bonnie B~

word verification: Jologro...The name of the 'hair tonic' in the second picture...

quinn said...

I think the "cracker" might be a pineapple. Don't ask me why...it was just my knee-jerk reaction at first glance.

I mean it...don't ask me why!

Lala27 said...

I actually kind of like #1. But make mine a cosmo.

Here's a song for #3 "Oh dreidel, dreidel, dreidel I made you out of cake, and when you're old and moldy, oh dreidel I will scrape" (and turn into some monstrosity for New Year's)

And I'm perversely intrigued at the construction of the Bud cake. Do you glue sheet cake to the side of a cooler or dig out a big hole of a larger one?

@ Morkus, re: Dogfish - I went to HS with the guy who started it, until he got kicked out. And his dad, an oral surgeon, pulled out eight of my teeth. Thanks for bringing up some good memories.

gryphondear said...

There is just no reason for any of those cakes. Not even the three olive martini.

A number of years ago, the Yuppy rage was Harvey Wallbanger cakes. There's no reason for them either, but I don't remember them being produced commercially.

;^) Jan the Gryphon
http://gryph-wotd.blogspot.com/

wv: fingish - when one has minor issues, but is not truly finicky

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

You don't drink hair tonic on New Year's Eve? Don't knock it until you've tried it. Ironically, once you do drink the tonic, that last cake is one of your hallucinations.

Becky said...

Wow...that exploding thing, whatever it may be, is horrible!
However, I do like the cooler one! It looks really good to me.
And UGH to that last one.

GracefulFire Girl said...

Well personally, being a "New Yoiker" I think the A train cake is right on for the 'hood. Lots of bling and spray paint to boot! (I am, of course, assuming that someone made this as a joke, right? Otherwise it would just be too awful to contemplate)

Go, Cake Wrecks in 2009!

Anonymous said...

I think that martini with the cupcake olives is pretty cute! and creative.

Diana said...

I actually love the beer cake. I wish someone would make one for me! (I'd actually prefer a pear cider - hint, hint...) I agree with the mystery foam being a (horribly disfigured) naked lady *shudder*
Keep up the "good" work!!!

Nichole said...

I cannot figure out that beer cake. Is that cake constructed AROUND the beer??

Bex said...

I >like< the beer cooler one!

Trish said...

My 5 yr old was looking at the cake pictures with me and when I got to the orange one, with the, um polka dots? She pointed and asked.. "Why does it have GRASS in it!? Is that a pinata?!" lol too funny

Rima said...

I thought those were chocolate bunnies on the last one. It added to the WTF factor.

Anonymous said...

It's kind of sad to think about, but if that martini cake had been done as a regular cake it would probably have finished up really cute.

bubbasmom said...

I have to disagree about the "no beer with cake" rule. Guiness is wonderful with chocolate cake!

Or does stout count as beer??? Hmmm...

Meg said...

Before reading a word of today's post I was completely puzzled by number one, I thought it was some sort of bizarre shark... then I read and obviously it does look like a martini glass. Though I agree that ONE olive would be much more appropriate.

Number Two. Moonshine all the way.

Number 3. Something about the way the end is "tied" makes me think of papier mache stuff we made in elementary school. When you'd blow up a balloon then papier mache, let that dry, then pop the balloon. Anyone? Anyone? Well, maybe they used a small regtangular mylar balloon and never popped it...

Heather, Neilson, Grace & Creighton said...

i think the green stripes on the chocolate ladies are supposed to be lasers. you know, like the laser lights at the clubs?

Amy said...

The first one looks like olives surrounded by blue cotton candy.

~Amy B.

Jennifer from Hurricane said...

A couple months back I was watching Amazing Wedding Cakes show where a cake was ordered with beer flavor. The couple's favorite holliday was Halloween so it was a spider web cake (red velvet) with beer flavored buttercream filling.

Anonymous said...

For a CCC, I don't think the martini cake is all that bad.

Anonymous said...

Dear Jen,

Actually a nice dark beer with very rich chocolate cake is incredibly awesome. Give it a try someday or even a Lambic raspberry beer with chocolate is divine! Happy New Year! Anabelle

Tori said...

#3 looks like a peeled, moldy pineapple. :D

HorribleLicensePlates said...

That 3rd cake looks like giardia (for all of you microbiology nerds). It's an intestinal parasite. Happy New Year!!!

Adele said...

Yup, white foam female (bet she's not a lady). Now as for the middle cake WTF IS IT????????
Adele

Juliet said...

"Well, it's New Year's Eve, and that means you've got two things on the brain right now: dieting and booze."

I nearly spit out my tea when I read that! #3 is a pineapple, with tinsel leaves and a few pieces of giant confetti. Or colourful tropical mold.

The beer bottles in the beer cooler cake look empty. Come on, if you're going to spring for a fancy cake, you can afford a six-pack of 'Bud' to put in it. Or... stay with me... a higher quality beer. That someone went to all that trouble for Budweiser is entertaining.

Saara said...

What do you mean cake and beer don't mix? In one otherwise bland business meeting, we had both beer and cake. Chocolate raspberry cake. Plus, we were allowed to consume the cake and the beer before and during the presentations and such. Relaxed the atmosphere quite a bit ;)

Anonymous said...

Along with the other approx. thirty-five people who obviously do not read the responses before posting their own, I say that the white "foam" is a white chocolate "lady." I can post this again if this addition to the dozens of other posts that say the same thing aren't enough. Sheesh.

Tobias Ragg said...

About the 'alcohol/hair tonic' bottle cake -- I think I recognise the hair tonic you see in it. It looks like it could be Pirelli's Miracle Elixir...

(I was Toby in a production of Sweeney Todd. I sold the stuff. For the uninitiated, Pirelli's Miracle Elixir is "piss, piss with ink".)

Anonymous said...

I agree with commenters above. The cooler is a bit of a wreck, but it's a loveable wreck. I, too, think the beads of condensation are a nice touch.

jennifer H in sc said...

couple things here, first to "anonymous" fussing about all the reposts..before they are moderated you cant see the others and then when there are several maybe you dont have the time to read every one.

Next, i really do like the beer cooler cake. i think new years i think football...not diet and booze, i know SEVERAL peps who would love a tailgating beer cake!

Passion Fruit said...

Are we sure the bottles on the 5th cake aren't empty?

Cuz I'm certain their contents contributed to the fright that is that cake.


WV: flacrody...oh, the possibilities!

--Brianna McCarthy

rishabree said...

I have to agree that the martini glass isn't too bad, and would move right into mildly acceptable if it only had one olive.

And the beer cake is downright well done! The concept is weird, but the execution is very professional.

Word verification: ingal. Oddly appropriate for that last, hideous cake, but I shall leave it at that.

Alix said...

Very nice Jen (golf clap), but where is the simple moonshine jug with the cork top and triple Xs? We Floridians demand the highest echelon of booze cakes, please!

Mrs Redboots (Annabel Smyth) said...

Definitely a reclining nude. And I, too, thought a pineapple, but a blast-ended skrewt is MUCH better!

The cup-cake martini is crude, but rather fun. And I positively like the beer cooler - a weird idea, but done well. And I dare say the cake was eaten first and the beer drunk later.

binks said...

ROFL - that last one was made for a strip club. I don't think anyone was really *ahem* "looking" at the cake.
I'm sure it probably wasn't eaten, either. *wink*wink*

Anonymous said...

Ok, I stand firm with Jen on the CCC issue. And in a way, this one just makes my point. It's kind of cute, and almost not a wreck, but it is going to be just as messy and over-frosted as every other CCC. The irony is, most of the justifications for CCCs (which I don't buy anyway) DO NOT APPLY to people who are old enough to be served cakes shaped like alcoholic beverages! So why not make a proper cake, which would be even cuter?

As for the last two, I suspect they're both just painted styrofoam. Seriously, is there any cake under there at all?

Jullee and Fam said...

Wow!! The Mystery foam lady scares me! I don't ever wanna go to a strip club where the dancing ladies look that tore up!

As for the Christmas Cracker/ Champagne bottle..to me it looks like a Puffer fish who has had a really rough day!

andie said...

I really like the martini CCC, and the beer cooler too. The orange one, I really have no idea, and the purple one gives me a hangover.

Thanks, Jen, and Happy New Year!

WV: levid. Sick and angry. "Sherry was just levid when John brought that nasty New Year's nightclub cake to her party."

Julia L. Haninger said...

I really hope those aren't real ice cubes in the beer cake.

And yes, the white thing on the final, um, cake is a naked lady. White chocolate, maybe?

The Dirty Business Bath Co. said...

I have to argue that beer with chocolate cake is good. I come from a German family and it's just what you do.

Brianna said...

I don't see the wreckiness of the martini cake or the beer cooler cake. And as for the last one, if you're going to do gaudy, go all the way! :)

Debbi said...

In reference to Jen's friend who likes orange juice with chocolate cake ... if you mix dark creme de cocoa liqueur with orange juice, it tastes EXACTLY like a tootsie roll! Swear!

WV ~ adope. OMG! I can't even go there!

danger girl said...

I think the 4th cake is just klassy enough for a strip club...um, I mean "Gentleman's club".

Anonymous said...

Being that the last cake says "A Train", I think the drunken airbrushing is meant to look like a subway car bombed out with spray paint. (Though I'm on the A train line and the only grafitti these days is done with acid or scratched on the surface. Not very colorful at all.)

Actually a cake that looked like a grafitti covered subway car would be kind of cool, IF someone could actually make it look like one!

Brammi said...

Oh wow.

I LIKE the martini CCC.

I like it ALOT.

I'd like it even better with only one or two olives but daymn...

... How-ev-ar...

I've been hitting the bubbly early. I'll check later to see if I still like it when I've sobered up.

dameruth said...

Well, assuming the beer-cooler cake was made to order, it's kinda hard to blame the decorator; after all, in the end they're being paid to produce what the customer asks for, even if it's dorky. The end result looks passable to me, considering it's a cake that also has to be a cooler.

Twolly said...

Like Anonymous pointed out, I'm surprised you didn't mention the white female figure on the top with the misshapen boobs and no neck.

Military Crunchy Mama said...

The holiday crackers have things to pull at both ends. So I think that I'll have to go with the champagne bottle. Or something like that anyway....

Tatersmama said...

I think that thing with "Celebrate" on it is actually supposed to be a party popper and not any type of booze. (google Party Poppers photos)

It's a little plastic bottle thing that goes "bang" and spews streamers and confetti when you pull the "cork".

Mandee said...

I know, I know...it's a CCC, but I totally love the martini cake! I so wish I had that at my house tonight!

All Adither said...

I actually like cake with beer. And with cookies. I'm an odd duck, I know!

Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)

Anonymous said...

My 11 yr old DD had to point out the white ... um.... person?? on the top. So yeah I think it is a womans form laying on her back! lol!!

Tatersmama said...

Oops... on 2nd thought, I think the blasted pineapple and hair tonic bottles are BOTH supposed to be party poppers.
Last night was New Years Eve here in Oz, and I saw more than my fair share of 'em.
I hate the things.
And the way I feel this morning.

Mad Hatter said...

these are so beautiful, happy new year !!

Becky B said...

Okay, I'm sorry but I love the beer cake, and the martini CCC is pretty darn cute, I have to say, as CCC's go. Can't wait to see what lies in store for next year. Happy NY!

Sven said...

Just adding another voice to the "chocolate cake goes very well with dark beer" choir.

Come to the dark (beer) side, we've got cake....


P.S: WV - nousn. Not really a noun, but almost.

FreedomFirst said...

Okay, don't hit me - I actually think the CCC martini wasn't too bad. It was nicely decorated at least, and they had the good sense to frost each one separately.

The sprouting bottle of something - I don't get that at all.

wolfmom said...

I'm with Rima on that chocolate bunny/bondage thing. That was my first take...then I finished reading what Jen wrote. But what is that purple curtain thing? A window...a door to the club? These are the kind of wreckerators that need to have their airbrushes disconnected from the compressors.

Did kind of like the CCC...definitely one olive.

My husband agrees that the orange thingie is a party cracker.

The beer cake is kind of cool...but why? When you cut the cake do the ice cubes/water run all over the table or is the beer in a rigid container? Way too many questions.

Love this website!

Elana said...

I think the "cracker" is a pineapple too! I thought that's for sure what it was when I first saw it (it's the green stuff coming out of the top--or what I have deemed the top, it's actually the bottom in this picture--that does it for me) and the more I looked at it the more i doubted myself (WTF is that grey swirly stuff on it? Why are there random bits of neon orange marshmallow looking things?)...but I'm glad to know I'm not alone!

Arnold Schwarzeneggar said...

You should not drink and bake.

redraven said...

I definitely see the nekid lady on top of the fourth cake, but the decor on the around the bottom looks like chocolate covered dog biscuits to me! Guess I've spent too much holiday time handing out treats to my pooch. Happy New Year everyone!

Hyena Overlord said...

One olive would suffice. It's still ugly. The orange thing. My cat ate tinsel at Christmas. I changed their food. I found an sparkly orangish thing in the litter box. Now we know what the orange cake commemorates.

The beer coolers is actually pretty neat. Hubby would like it.

The other monstrosity looks like a pimps birthday cake. A Train, the pimp in his party palace with da ladezz.

wvotd shuto..."A Train hustled his way through the party. His flared pants and platform shoes making a shu to, shu sound as they brushed the 2 inch long nap on the shag carpet"

sendingtheclowns said...

Here I am again, in my own little world...
What I *saw* when gazing upon the martini cake (for that magical first moment) was a scan of some very unfortunate person's lower gastrointestinal tract. One with some serious-looking growths crowding into the abdominal cavity, at that.
Cake diagnosis: terminal.
As for the "celebrate" bottle cake--it brings me in mind of an old-fashioned, glass, hospital urinal for the bedridden. A full one, too!
=^()()^=

Lara said...

OMG - I just tried to post a link to the Cake Wrecks blog on a friend's Facebook wall and it was marked as 'abusive content' and I couldn't post the link!!

Facebook then logged me out of my account saying there was suspicious activity going on.

Might want to look into that.

Love this blog :)

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

We seem to have a cheap beer theme going.... Miller Lite... Bud ick.....

Scritzy said...

Quoting Simon Cowell here ...

What the bloody hell?

I am wondering just what sort of gathering would require a CCC made to look like a martini??? Is it James Bond Jr.'s birthday?

I don't drink, but dang, those whatever they are make me want to.

Happy New Year, and may many more wrecks come your way!

WriterGirl17 said...

I've seen a few people's comments that are exactly along my thought line: the orange cake is a pineapple.

But the ordinary pineapple does not usually include pineapple. So here's my theory: Spongebob Squarepants decorated his house for Christmas and someone has captured that in cake form.

Anonymous said...

While not arguing about the supposed tastefulness of beer on a cake, I do know that the beer bottles are made from sugar (toffee) and are shaped in a food safe latex mould. The ice is also made from sugar.

OzCockatoo said...

My first comment ever on this blog - but I've been following it for a while and love your work!

@ Tatersmama's party popper suggestion - having seen a few of them last night myself, the streamer bits come from the other end... so the "Celebrate" one would be upside down in that case too. Re the "pineapple" LOL, maybe if there was *one* string from the narrow end (but the "bubbles" at the other end are still mysterious)...

Weirdly, I found the martini and beer ones kinda cute ;-)

@ Anonymous complaint - I would have thought anybody submitting a comment would realise they're moderated and note the time stamps on all the "copycat" ones???

And finally, WV: swelsib - What a swell sib for buying me such a "groovy" cake?

Anonymous said...

The hair tonic one made me think of the musical Sweeney Todd when Toby is selling Pirelli's Miracle Elixer, Sweeney Todd says it's "nothing but an errant fraud, concocted from piss and ink." Or in this case, piss and food coloring.

Puanani said...

I thought they were chocolate bunnies. Whew! The fact that they are chocolate ladies actually makes me feel better.

slythwolf said...

We're sure that third one isn't some kind of a mutant radioactive pineapple?

Calantha said...

That last one is just an eyesore! Like, Grand Canyon or Empire State Building-caliber EYESORE, it's obnoxiousness is on such a grand scale!

Happy New year to you and yours, Jen, and to all Cake Wrecks readers!

Donna said...

The first one looks like there were some left over monster eyes from halloween and somebody said "Let's make them into martini olives"...the third one, I was thinking carrot.

Yénifer said...

Wait, those things on the last cake are in the form of women? W...wow. I was wondering what in the name of time those were...

sunshyne said...

That last cake was obviously distressing. I had to look twice to see the naked foam lady.

I'm sad that the creator of the martini cake thought cupcakes were the way to go, especially for the martini glass. Not mad...just sad.

I love this blog.

Eric said...

I have identified the mysterious orange "cake." It's actually an alien dung beatle.

Anonymous said...

I think that the beer bottles on the cooler cake are actually made of sugar.

TychaBrahe said...

I think the "joystick" is a toilet plunger.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I know it's not for everyone, but my hubby would absolutely love that beer cooler cake. I'm actually considering ordering one for his next birthday! Hey, it's a guy thing...

Miss Shavon said...

Actually, in my sorority days, we used to order a white cake and a pony keg of some cheap light beer for every occasion...it's not a bad combo.
-Shavon

Inky said...

I can't believe no one's mentioned the purple lepord print curtains on the last cake. They're so deliciously tacky!

Amy in StL said...

Sorry to correct you but beer and chocolate cake are a great combination. A stronger beer tends to go better with the chocolate, but don't knock it until you've tried it.

12ontheinside said...

I kinda liked the beer one. I'm thinking of getting one made now, for my boyfriend's 40th later this year!

Hunter said...

For some help overcoming the "no beer with cake" thing, this might help give some ideas beyond the obvious stout connection (and people, please, "Guinness" isn't a style, and it's by no means the be-all and end-all of cream stouts). I can personally lend a big thumbs-up to the double IPA/carrot cake connection. Actually the only way I can stomach carrot cake (the stuff's just too sweet on its own).

Anonymous said...

For dieting cakes: How about the "One Bon-Bon is poison"?

Gah! You've ruined my mind! All I saw was mystery foam. I saw this cake one day and went to comment about a week later about the dieting cakes, and then I saw the comments.

Jessica said...

I am sorry but i LOVE the Beer cooler cake (although I would never drink the CRAP BEER they have in it- some good imported AlE... oh yeah)!!! I have two Beer lover friends and this would be the perfect cake for thier birthdays. Jessica M

Heather in Houston said...

Beer with cake, blech? No way! Especially beer with CHOCOLATE CAKE! I am a baker and I adore beer with cake. But, you pretty much have to love beer and cake to enjoy them together. If you only tolerate beer, chances are you'll be grossed out at the thought of them together.

Joanne said...

that white lump (with lumps) on top IS a woman's form! huzzah! she's laying on her back with one knee up.

Cupcakes Lady said...

I think my husband would appreciate the Bud beer cake. Is there actually real ice in with the bottles? I think that could get messy...as well a bit soggy cake though! Thanks Suzanne xx

ali love said...

hmmm its great :)

Jaine said...

beer and cake is perfect, beer and anything is perfect sheesh