Friday, December 12, 2008

Keith and What's-Her-Name

Friday, December 12, 2008

How you know your impending wedding is merely an excuse for your co-workers to eat cake:


But really, shouldn't (Bride) be in quotation marks?
Anonymous said...

Wow. There are so many ways to take this that I hope for Keith's sake the bride, assuming she existed and/or knew about her upcoming nuptials, didn't show up at the party.

At least the bouquet is pretty (although not to my taste)...

Word verification = trocut, which sounds like a part of a tuxedo

Leslie said...

The other day they ran a thing in Dear Abby about a lady whose fiancee backed out on her so she asked a friend to marry her instead and "since he wasn't doing anything he said sure." (hence all the wedding guests thought they'd gotten the groom's name wrong).
And somehow I feel like that might be what inspired this cake. Maybe the decorator wanted to have all the bases covered just in case the bride got cold feet.

Bibi said...

Oh dear, oh dear . . . If the groom's name were different I'd say that baker had just met my new sister-in-law and thought she was as replaceable as we do.

An Apron Straitjacket said...

Maybe he placed a want ads in the paper and wanted to cover his bases....

"Wanted: Bride. Just show up at the 1st Church of the Desperate at 2pm Saturday. Cake included".

Christina said...

i can only hope that a) this party was for keith and the bride will not be attending and b) keith is the typical guy and will forget to mention this to his bride.

why would you host if a wedding show if you don't even know half the couple's name? just so beyond rude. x_X

Liz said...

Parentheses are the new quotation marks! Didn't you see it during NYC and Paris Grammar Week??

Vashti said...

Hahaha thats great!!!!
I saw a perfect cake wreck today, and wouldnt you know i didnt have my camera on me!

All Adither said...

Perhaps she was mail order and they hadn't met yet?

Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)

Shannon said...

Keith was just waiting for the 'yes' or 'no' unfortunately the cake decorator could not wait any longer.

Paige said...

What bothers me most are the little pink things! Does this cake have a rash?

Marie said...

One of my all-time favourites. Thank you for a genuine lol.

Maybe he ordered it before he'd decided on that particular detail?

Anonymous said...

@Bibi: Did you really just type that comment into a popular blog on the Internet and not only use your real name but include a link to your own blog? Like, for real? Most of me is hoping you're just kidding, but it really seems genuine every time I read it.

Amy said...

That is too funny.
Amy B.

Melanie B. said...

They should have put "Spouse," just in case Keith is gay. They obviously don't know him very well!

Kelli said...

I'm guessing that whoever ordered the cake knew Keith but not (Bride) and was planning on calling back with the correct name. Still, oh so sad that any decorator would put that on a cake. Why not just write Congratulations and be done with it!!

GreenEggsandSam said...

ok, that's good stuff. What I find curious is that the cake is clearly for Keith (bride is on her own, it seems). If the cake was for a man, why does it look SO feminine. Come on co-workers, just PRETEND to care about Keith and bride.
Just goes to show that every office has a Milton... "now, Milton, don't be greedy'
name that movie!

Deborah Godin said...

Maybe he's a bigamist, or a polygamist...and has a whole bunch of these in the freezer.

Cara said...

...unless Barron IS the bride...and whoever ordered the cake thought it necessary to tastelessly specify.

Ashley said...

The cake is actually really cute (to me) with that small exception...poor Mrs. Barron.

I have to disagree with Christina on this one because in my world, typical guys ALWAYS tell you the things you absolutely do not need to hear. My boyfriend (and some of those of my friends) has no edit button.

Melissa Gill said...

Paige - I'm with you on the pink things, I'm not quite sure what they're supposed to be and they just look sort of icky!

Jen said...

Perhaps that cake is from her mother in law. After all, we wouldn't want to acknowledge the name of the person who is taking away her baaaaaaaaaby. :)

LesleMora said...

BAHAHAHA The poor Mrs-to-be. Hope she didn't see that or subscribes to this blog.

Alix said...

Could perhaps Barron be a he and therefore the need to identify him as the Bride?

Word verification: "perspac" as in that's my perspactive on this anyway.

Bonnie said...

I thought the cake was at least pretty, until Paige said, "...does the cake have a rash?" That's hilarious!

You know, with all the odd names these days...Cocoa, Apple, Police Inspecktor...maybe that's really her name...Bride...

Happy Friday!

~Bonnie B

Matt407 said...

It could have been worse. The decorator could have misspelled the bride's name as "Barren"...

Jennifer said...

This is seriously one of the more hideous cakes I've seen. Obviously the name error just makes me sad, but on what planet does that dark blue border go with a pink rash?

Kate said...

It would be funnier if this cake was ordered by the groom's mother.

Start To Finish Supplies said...

Wow! Why didn't they just leave the names off?? Looks like a bad omen.

smarmygal said...

I think we are missing the positive here, people. They spelled CONGRATULATIONS correctly! Soooooo close to not being Wrecktastic, and yet so very, very far...

*James* said...

At least they spelt congratulations right...

Brianna said...

Maybe the bride's name is Barron and they felt the need to designate it as such to the decorator?

Larisa said...

I think the frosting bag got a little warm because it's not defined in the white diamond, bottom right.

Bailey's Leaf said...

Paige, I'm glad that the pink zits in the corners bothered someone else besides me!

UGH!

Bob said...

Of course, with some very traditional arranged marriages the bride and the groom do not meet until the wedding day. But, I think they do know each other's names.

GM said...

Maybe Keith's mother ordered it. My M-I-L would do something like that.

Mari said...

I thought it was odd that they put the last name on a wedding cake. I haven't seen that before. Wouldn't want any confusion, what with the (Bride) and all...Lol

Tranquility said...

Seriously? Not one person in the office knew her name or could have descretely found out? That's just soooo sad! I would have been insulted if I was even a tiny bit friends with ANYONE in that office!

Chelle said...

Perhaps they wanted to clarify that Barron was the bride??

tim h said...

I think this is just an example of poor scripting, someone should've used brackets.

Anonymous said...

Looks like a hint from bachelor Keith's mom who wants grandchildren.

Lea

relllii said...

I can't believe that nobody has mentioned the horrible color choices here.... Baby Pink and Prince Purple. Blech!

fading in the sun said...

obviously he married Uma Thurman's character in "Kill Bill".

Pearl said...

hahahaha!

Anonymous said...

You would think that is someone went to all that trouble to make and decorate the cake, and then realized "Oh dear, I don't know the bride's name." that they would just say "Congratulations!" and leave it at that.

Chellie (from www.ilovemyself.com)

ros said...

Keith Barron? Hmm. That rings a bell...

Hold on a minute while I google.

Ah! Keith Barron. I think I saw him in panto once.

slycreations said...

Perhaps Keith has gotten married so many times his coworkers are tired of learning the brides' names??

DNfromMN said...

Hmm.. I guess Keith was a little indecisive

Fluffy Cow said...

I'm more worried about Keith, cuz (Bride) is gonna KILL him...

Karen said...

Not that logic played any part in the design or execution of this cake, but why not just put "Congratulations Keith". He's obviously (hopefully) the honoree at the party.

Anonymous said...

The first cake reflects another one of my pet peeves. Whenever you are casually listing a married couple's name (versus a formal listing), the woman's name should always come first. Not the man's. This drives me crazy. (The reasoning is that their shared last name (if they have one) belongs to him and this way it keeps his name together. I also think it is a nice balance to women's names totally disappearing in the formal form). Sorry for the hijack, this just drives me insane!

Tatersmama said...

Hey maybe the the brides name was "Bridey" and the decorator just got confused? "Bride" must have been less than pleased though.
But with the decorative bits in the corners? I don't know which is worse...
Thinking those pink dotty things are heat rash or thinking that they're pimples. URP!

megryphon said...

Either Bride is the female partner's name and the parentheses are unecessary, or Bride is parenthetical because the person who took the order wanted the person who decorated the cake to know that Barron is the bride (in either case, someone needs to explain grammar to the decorator.)

Aside from all that the color combo is just too MUCH!

and what kind of a word verification is nonpoker?

;^) Jan the Gryphon
http://gryph-wotd.blogspot.com
aka Jan Combs

Aimee said...

I love the uneven trim in the upright corner.

The Cox Family said...

Too funny!

Missy said...

Jan, "nonpoker" is what Keith will be doing to (Bride) when she finds out about this cake!

Lindsay said...

i'm reading it as Barron is the bride's name. and whomever placed the order found it necessary to specify...but, they placed the (Bride) in front of Barron instead of after, so to the decorator--who was only trying to do their job by copying EXACTLY the order form, the (Bride) part was necessary...and the Barron part looked like a last name, so therefore it was an afterthought.
you know like "i was going to leave Barron off, but the cake just looks silly with 'Keith & (Bride)'. i'll throw the Barron down here to specify which Keith and (Bride)"

Julie said...

Congratulations on your wedding! would have sufficed here. What was the decorator thinking? Or maybe they weren't and that was the problem :)

Julie
(from www.cakesandkids.com)

Susan said...

Oh my! I went to high school with a Keith Barron. Seriously! I wonder who (Bride) is? Too funny.

evil cake lady said...

you mean no one is bothered by the plastic flowers? i mean, the rash is bad, the colors are bad, and obviously the wording is awesome...but the plastic flowers! kill me now!

Anonymous said...

Hehehe, I can see how this one happened...

"Hi, I'd like to order a cake for an office party, it needs to say 'Congratulations Keith and...' blast, I don't know his fiance's name! I'll get it and call you back later. Their last name is Barron."

So the order taker writes down "Congratulations Keith and (Bride) Barron", with a mental note to fill it in later.

But then the orderer never calls back, and it's down to the last fifteen minutes before pickup, and the decorator is a new hire who doesn't have the guts to violate their VERY STRICT policy on delivering EXACTLY what the customer ordered... And so a wreck is born.

sparkly_jules said...

I think just Keith would have been fine, since it was his co-workers who were feting him. Ugh.

And quotations would have made it look smarmy like "Bride" (as in so-called), so if I had to pick, I'd take parentheses.

Glad I'm not Keith's (bride) wife.

SJ

(Bride) Barron said...

WHY IS EVERYBODY MAKING FUN OF MY WEDDING CAKE???

Anonymous said...

Might have been more polite for (Bride) to put "what's her name". heh

Margaret said...

When in doubt, there are 4 words to save you from this....

TO THE HAPPY COUPLE !!!!

Kristi said...

Let me guess. Brian's mom ordered the cake and doesn't like his fiance.

tarajackson said...

Ya know, my husband's grandmother (who, bless her heart, isn't all there really) wrote something similar on the first Christmas card to us after we were married. It said, "To Kyle & His Beautiful Bride".

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the lol!

Perhaps the the bride's first name is Barron and the coworker who called in the order didn't know how to spell that. She called back with the information but the order taker added it to the end of the phrase, rather than replacing the word "bride".

The Pink Queen Albatross said...

Who would request a cake and not know the names of the individuals you are putting on the cake. If I was Keith I would be a little peeved that my co-workers or whoever felt like they needed to throw me a party but didn't even know the name of his fiance.

Scritzy said...

Well, since my Jerkoid Nephew just got engaged to his fifth fiancée (before the divorce from fourth fiancée/first wife is final), I'd say this cake is for him.

Except that his name isn't Keith.

Dani said...

I am a faithful cake wrecks viewer and you know the scariest thing about this? My very recent ex (we broke up tonight, the 18th) is named Keith Barron...and he works at a place with a bakery so I could be "Bride." I'm scarred.

Stretch Mark Mama said...

Oh my word. The cakes are funny in and of themselves, but your comments are just, well...icing on the...

Sorry.

Old joke.

Your comment for this one reminds me of Jim Gaffigan's cake routine, which I've seen 873 times. Laugh every time, too. "Well, I should at least say 'hello.'"

Anonymous said...

"An Apron Straitjacket said...

Maybe he placed a want ads in the paper and wanted to cover his bases....

"Wanted: Bride. Just show up at the 1st Church of the Desperate at 2pm Saturday. Cake included".

THE CAKE IS A LIE!