Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Displays That Time Forgot

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Some people would have you believe that bakeries should update their window display cakes at least once a year or so. To this I say "pish tosh"! Why, check out these stellar examples, still sellin' the goods 10, even 15 years after they were made!


Wow, I don't know about you guys, but I am just itching for some cake right now. Or maybe just itching. Is that blood? Sweet!

(And before you ask, yes, I DO feel rather silly for censoring plastic boobs. Happy?)

Ah, nothing captures the essence of celebration quite like crumbling moldy icing and decapitated clown heads, am I right or am I right? Those customers will be pouring in any second now, I'm sure.

Or how about this one, sure to entice all the would-be brides out there:

Just ignore that fly on the top tier; he's been stuck there for a few weeks now, so we're pretty sure he's dead. Oh, and the flowers?


We call that color "perfect patina". It was inspired by the rusting water pipes in our basement. The dust really completes the look, don't you think?


Here's another one for the happy couple on their Big Day:

Ok, so the bride and groom's eyes have melted down their faces, and his hand has made a break for it down his leg. (Heh - "made a break for it") Even so, I have no doubt that the overall design of the bride huffily facing away from the groom and with her bags packed down below is a top seller.

UPDATE: Some of you have asked if all of these came from the same bakery. Nope! This lovely assortment represents *three* separate bakeries, and I believe all of them were open for business at the time. Ain't it great?

Thanks to Wreckporters Extraordinaire Monique R. and Melissa J.!
Amanda said...

wait... i don't get it. is this shop CLOSED?

please, give me some context. this isn't just a cake wreck, this is just downright bizarre. and... unhealthy!

searching_for_something said...

Those melted eyes, urgh! I close my own eyes and its all I can see argh!

Anonymous said...

There is something truly wrong about those cakes (and those bakeries). I wanted to look away, but I just couldn't.

Shame on anyone who orders cakes from there based on those examples.

Anonymous said...

And that's some sad latticework going on on that wedding cake too.

ChatRabbit said...

Oh, ew, ew, EWWWWW. Just gross. They look like items from a haunted bakery shop. The clown one is the "best"!

Steph said...

I have to thank you for your blog. I was sent here yesterday by Beth and you have quickly become one of my favorite blogs. Some of the cakes have me laughing so hard I'm crying. Don't we all need a good laugh!

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

That first cake is an actual scene from my house: me -looking fab, plastic & sexy - yet collecting dust and decaying while waiting for hubby to turn off the TV and pay a smidge of attention to me. The empty booze bottle is a sad, yet authentic touch.

HorribleLicensePlates said...

Ewww those are gross! I just puked a little!

Amanda said...

Oh, oh! How gross! That clown one is freaking me out.

Justfrosting said...

Not to gross anyone out further, but that is not DUST...it is fly feces.

Don't ask me how I know.

Yep. Yum.

Passion Fruit said...

Hahaha!

You've made my morning yet again!

Which says alot since my workplace flooded (2 feet of swamp/river water - rats, centipedes, spiders, and ringworm) on Tuesday and smells like those cakes look.

Yup, you brought a smile to this face today!

Brianna McCarthy (Passion.Fruit)
http://briannamccarthy.carbonmade.com

Trevor said...

You know, at first glance some of those didn't look too bad. I was like "what's wrong with that?" Then I looked closely and was like "EWWW!"

indeed, places with windows need to change their displays from time to time.

Erin T. said...

Yum... Makes me want to run right out and buy a cake!

utaduta said...

yummy! dead clowns and mold. my fav!

Anonymous said...

Long time reader; first time poster.

Just one thing to say...ugh!

~Jeffrey

The Lili Effect said...

Wow.

Cake wrecks so rarely makes me wish I hadn't eaten my breakfast.

I believe these surpass even the podiatrist's icky foot cake in sheer hurl factor.

catmania said...

Egad! Are the top two brown on purpose or from age? Either way it is too scary to think about, can we say ptomaine poisioning? Word verification - plied, as in "I would have to be plied with a LOT of alcohol to even think of eating these cakes!"

Anonymous said...

Yeeesh. How about next time you start with the least disgusting cake instead of saving it for last? You could have at least eased us into the grossness... :)~

Kate said...

I think I threw up in my mouth a little. Those are so gross, and I am embarrassed for any bakery that would keep those in the window. BARF.

--Kate (redmcfred.blogspot.com)

Linda Stranger said...

OMG... that's discusting! :P

I think I'll be holding off on breakfast for a bit. "gag"

Thanks for sharing ;)
Linda :)

Mary B said...

:hurls:

joyce said...

Thank you for addressing this problem. I visited a bakery the paper mentioned as having great cookies, but was so turned off by the display cakes. Bleck.

Judas_Iscariot_79 said...

OMG! Seeing that first cake is like going through a time warp. I remember when I was a kid I would go to the donut shop with my dad every Sunday morning to get donuts after church (mind you, I was born in 1979, so tells you how long this cake in particular has probably been there). They had a catalog of cakes you could order and I always wondered who would order a cake with a plastic naked chick draped in some sort of sheer little dress. I mean, it seemed like only guys would like it, but who orders a cake for a bachelor party? Anyway, thanks for the trip down memory lane!

Leslie said...

Gack! Who would honestly leave a cake in the window that long? Seriously? The mold positively gives me the heebie jeebies...mostly because I'm the one that cleans out our fridge so I'm usually the one that finds the nasty leftovers of indeterminate origin.
These are beyond wrecks...these are health code violations.

Kara said...

Re: the first wedding cake

What is that top tier sitting on? A cube of tofu?

Tracy O said...

OK, I've read this whole blog and this is the first one that actually turned my stomach. Even worse than the foot and the pregnant headless woman in the tub. Shouldn't the health department be getting involved at this point?
Tracy O

PS Word verification - reopere - I don't think we can reopere these cakes - just trash them, NOW!

Alix said...

Charming, I'm sure. All the mineral ore and compost in those frostings sure makes me want to get married all over again and march straight into those bakeries for a little consult... with the Health Inspector! But hey - even the FDA has allowable ppm's for insect parts in our foodstuffs, so what the hell.

Alixandra Hice
http://casahice.blogspot.com

kerry said...

ok, that is just disgusting. bleurgh

Atheist at 15 said...

Haha, I really liked the first one. I love this blog, keep them coming.

sciencegirl said...

oh my god.
Thanks Jen; you've put me off cake for a long, long time here.

FreedomFirst said...

If I had an appetite this morning, I would have just lost it.

Laura said...

it would be better to just not put a cake on display at ALL if they can't update them every couple of months!

Angie said...

Those cakes rock! They are just what I needed, I've been trying to loss a few pounds and now seeing them I have no desire to eat anything. . . ever again.

Virginia said...

I'm suddenly very glad that I didn't look at this until after I finished breakfast!

All Adither said...

ZOMG, those are the funniest and grossest cakes I've ever seen. Someone was awfully proud of their work.

Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)

Lildonbro said...

Is that mold beneath his feet or are his pants melting?

Deborah Godin said...

Those clowns do nothing to rehabilitate the image of clowns in general. And the wedding cake with the fly, etc. is just wonderful! I mean it, wonderful...for the Corpse Bride maybe (haha, you thought I was serious for a minute!)

The Wabbit said...

Oh hilarious! The clown cake is the scariest of them all. You are so right about decapitated clown heads.(Although, that's be best kind of clown head, isn't it?)

Thanks for the morning giggles.

mary said...

I'm not sure you've ever actually made me gag... like, really I'm-going-to-be-sick gag before, but the flowers on that first wedding cake just did it.

Urp.

The Seeker said...

Ok, those are disgusting...

I remember those scary little clowns though. I had them on a cake of mine when I was a kid (in the 70's)!

Anonymous said...

Miss Havisham's on her way round to reclaim that wedding cake methinks....

Carol

An Apron Straitjacket said...

I think we've now made it very clear why many people are afraid of clowns!

yousuckatcraigslist said...

I was about to eat my breakfast. Now I think I might not.

Anonymous said...

The wedding cake is the most disgusting wreck I've ever seen, even worse than the foot cake. The fly, the moldy flowers...bleargh! It makes me think of the crazy lady in Great Expectations who kept her wedding cake for years. And the first two brown cakes are almost as bad.

lizzied said...

DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN. Those are absolutely the most horrible things I've ever seen. Has anyone called the Health Department?? Seriously... that's just not right!

Heather said...

Just when I was thinking about jumping off the diet wagon you put me firmly right back on it. I don't think I will look at cake quite the same way for a while.

Morgi said...

I remember those clowns-and-balloons decorations from when I worked in the bakery. I thought they were creepy then...

bozoette said...

They are clearly waiting to take the wedding cake with the flowers to Antiques Roadshow. The patina -- sorry -- makes the cake!

Eeeeek!!! said...

That last one is the Indiana Jones wedding cake. Don't look directly at the altar!!!

I wish I hadn't just sat down to eat my bagel when I started looking at these, but I couldn't stop scrolling down to look at them. Grosssss!

Terey said...

Oh come on - can that be for real? It can't be...please...

(and I was going to comment about the censored plastic boobies before I scrolled down!)

Sabrina said...

Wow. For some reason the word atrocious comes to mind.

*Michelle said...

I do believe this has added a whole new level to the wrecktastic world of bakeries and cakes gone wrong. And all of a sudden I don't feel so bad about my 2 week old leftovers in my fridge. =)

Brandi said...

I have to wonder also about what Amanda said. Is this from a closed and defunct bakery that just hasn't been cleaned out yet? I just have a hard time imagining that someone would leave something in the window THAT long. I guess anything is possible but EWWWWWWWWWWW.

Jen said...

Okay, those are the most disgusting cakes I've ever seen! I'm curious too...was the bakery closed and out of business?? If not, that's just gross! Who would buy a cake from them???

Stunbunny said...

Is this bakery in Chicago by any chance? Because I've seen plenty of bakeries in and around Chicago with exactly these kinds of display "cakes."

The only thing missing is the commercially-supplied posters taped up in the window that have long since been bleached varying shades of blue by the sun. YUM!

Havocec said...

Are they props for a new Stephen King movie, The Cake Shop?

I hate clowns so I expected nothing less then gross form a cake with clowns on it.

How long do display cakes last, on average in a display window? Is there a town somewhere caught in some moldering time warp?

You should post a kitten before showing us these cakes. That's what Weasel does to warn us of wicked things coming our way.

You could have posted these cakes yesterday BEFORE I ate half of the leftover birthday cake.

wvotd: Fleca..."I see fly fleca on those cakes."

Nonetheless, keep up the good work.

Amy said...

Ooooh...yum! Would you like a slice of mouldered cake to go with your clotted milk? Heh, heh, heh...
~Amy B.

Heather S. said...

I so want that little plastic boobies doll! Everything else is a bit gross. I was hoping someone went nuts with green-brown airbrushing until I saw the first wedding cake with just a few decorations rotting away. Ugh.

Lisa said...

I think I'm going to be sick :P

The Barnes Crew said...

GROSS!!! How do they get business with that crap in the window?

crispybenfranklin said...

Ugh. I never knew cake could be so revolting.

Amy said...

Thanks for the memories---I've seen all those decorations on cake (sans the faceless bride and groom at the end) but I haven't seen them since probably 1991.

Thanks for the trip down memory lane. Apparently some people are still walking it.

Fluffy Cow said...

Mmmm... visual food poisoning.

Rapunzel210 said...

All we need is Miss Haversham!

Theresa said...

The faces on the bride/groom cake are not melting. The blue is from them crying their eyes out. Which would be appropriate given the content and construction of said cake.

April said...

omg, that's TERRIBLE!

Wild Roses said...

That is so disgusting! The wedding cake with the green rusty flowers? EWW! And the second "wedding" cake looks more like a "sorry you're getting a divorce" cake, to me.

But any of them would make me RUN, not walk, away from the bakery.

BLECH!

Shan said...

I think I used those clown heads in my first cake decorating class 8 years ago!

Jim and Garret said...

The word, ewwwwwwwwwww comes to mind. Maybe they were Halloween Haunted cakes? Sadly, I'm sure it was some old baker who smells of mothballs and made those in 1972.

jimandgarret.blogspot.com

-Garret-

Holly said...

Those are disgusting! (The real fly is a great touch...)

Rebecca said...

These would be appropriate with a liitle sign in front that said:
"In memory of our dear departed little old lady cake decorator that passed away 20 years ago!"
Or something like that!

I wonder if really old cakes could be the cause of a storefront window fire?

Synacious said...

That first cake has to be from this bakery in Brooklyn. I've passed it many times over the years. If it's not, then we have a duplicate out there and I will hunt it down and take pictures of it. I'm pretty sure that is the one though.

Rapunzel210 said...

That crazy lady from Great Expectations was Miss Haversham!!

EK Black said...

Just can't help wondering what those blotches of white are in the last one. I think it's my mind trying to think about something other than how revolting all of these are.

nrosetulip said...

I wonder what the floor (window) model discount is...

Bailey's Leaf said...

I thought I was hungry . . .

Kamilla said...

I'm having flashbacks---I'm pretty sure my mother used similar clown heads on one of my brother's b-day cakes when we were kids. It explains a lot, actually....

Great blog. Keep 'em coming!

Graham said...

I'm glad a previous poster mentioned Miss Havisham. I've concluded that you need a whole subsection of superannuated, DOH-condemned cakes: Havisham Hall.

Tiffany said...

This reminds me of the episode of "Kitchen Nightmares" where Gordon found the stockroom completely overrun by roaches. I'm going to go throw up now. Thanks! ;-P

Rusty, Bandit, and Smokey said...

Those are hilarious! This is a really funny blog; like a lot of people, I too enjoy seeing professional things go horribly wrong, cakes included!

Anna Marie (Rusty, Bandit, and Smokey are my pets)

Vashti said...

the top one looks like a rat has had a nibble!
they are so sick!

Anonymous said...

OHHHHH!!!! I LOVE THIS BLOG!!! And I love that those "cakes" exist (surely, we can all agree that this is a correct use of quotations), if only so that we can comment on them here and make me laugh so hard I scare the people around me. What those...things...really need is to be stamped with a huge sticker that says "You've just been wreckported to cakewrecks.com"

And fabulous Great Expectation references...

Happy Almost Friday~ Bonnie

Word Verification: Kinverma...ummm..I can't come up with anything on that one...

Amy Ruthanne said...

I can't believe anybody trying to sell a cake has these horrible wrecks on display! I mean, it makes for great viewing here but seriously, that has to be reverse advertising for a business. Hey look at us, we have awful cakes! Don't shop here!

Lorraine said...

I'm digging that zombie bachelor party cake.

Belle Plain said...

I love this post! The other day I walked past a bakery in my neighborhood, and like a good aspiring 'Wrecker, I checked out the cakes in the window. I got excited for a second by what I thought was poor execution and even worse spelling, but when I looked closer I realized it was just cracking with age and several of the letters had fallen off.

Now I realize that neglect can produce wrecks, too! I'm off to take some pictures!

P.S. Don't know about the cakes in this post, but the ones I saw were in the window of a bakery that is open. Doesn't do much business though - wonder why?

Lauren said...

I distinctly remember those clowns from an old family birthday photo. Just the kind of thing my grandmother bought... in the late '80s.
Blechh!!

Graham said...

No, Rapunzel, sorry, that's not correct. It really is Miss Havisham. You could look it up.

just me said...

Ho-lee CRAP! (Crap being the operative word here...)

Are those all at the same place?

And, I don't understand the appeal of the dust-colored frosting and the plastic stuff on top? Even if these all look that way because it IS dust, I've seen this look elsewhere, and it is surreal to me that these are cakes, and someone thought this was an attractive juxtaposition to FOOD.

icky

Anonymous said...

The one with the fly would have looked okay if it was fresh. As it is; bleurgh.

Landry said...

It's like Mrs. Havisham's house in Great Expectations!

Jami said...

Hahaha! You said his hand make a break for it. That made snort!

M is for Mama said...

I'm gonna have nightmares now...

kristi said...

That is almost enough to make me swear off eating cake forever!!! There should be a warning on this post. haha.

Anna said...

Can't sleep, clowns will eat me...

MaryO said...

Any day now Stephen King is going to write either a short story OR a book that explains these wrectastic kakes. I think these belong in the Halloween category.

The clown kake(wreck) REALLY, REALLY creeps me out. I can just imagine:

The clock strikes midnight. The clowns PULL themselves up out of the moldy/fly dung speckled icing and go in search of... HUMANS to torture, suck blood or.. well. I think I've taken this line of thought as far as I care to!!

Awesomely gross and very, very scary!

Mary Ellen said...

Are these all because you said you'd like to see a Great Expectations wedding cake???

sumatra22 said...

Not the cakewreck post one wants to read when scarfing down a salad...ugh. On a more positive note, perhaps the "cake-acyllin" and "amoxicing" can be used to fight diseases and cure strep throat. Much more soothing than those nasty capsules!

Rapunzel210 said...

To Graham: As to the "Haversham" "Havisham" question--I wasn't trying to correct anyone; when I wrote "that was Miss Haversham!", it was in response to the person who mentioned the crazy lady in Great Expectations. I actually googled "Haversham" because I couldn't remember how it was spelled and got responses. I should have researched further.

debbiearnn said...

ugh! that is NASTY!!!
Why would a bakery do this to itself???

Francois Tremblay said...

"And before you ask, yes, I DO feel rather silly for censoring plastic boobs."

Then don't do it.

Censorship is self-tyranny.

Erin said...

Those cakes are terrible, especially that one with the crap colored flowers. who would even want to buy that or better yet...eat it.

Chad said...

Good Lord! Is that a cake depicting a devastating account of clowns stuck in a mudslide?!

Anonymous said...

(And before you ask, yes, I DO feel rather silly for censoring plastic boobs. Happy?)


Then please stop. There is nothing here that needs censoring and you have never posted one that did. Censoreship is wrong and these are just cakes. Let it go and just post them in all their horrifying glory.

Lindsey said...

These are so gross! They make me want to never eat cake again! Well, of course, until tonight when I'm with my girlfriends at a holiday boutique... But no cake for at least a few hours!

Those cakes give me the shivers. :(

Becky B said...

Ew, ew, and more ew.

hollyml said...

It's a Boozy Bimbo on the Beach! And it is oddly fascinating to me.

Is it supposed to be gold, and is that because the plastic sex bomb is meant to be sitting on a beach? The little plastic palm tree is suggestive of that interpretation, and there appears to be writing in the 'sand' too (though I can't tell what it says, and maybe it's graffiti -- you know, like "wash me" on a dirty car window). But then: Pink roses?

Or was it originally all pink, which has just gone brown and dusty with age? In which case: Plastic palm tree?

Furthermore: Why does the "invitingly" posed plastic sex bomb have only ONE wineglass? And, for that matter, why is the wineglass larger than the wine bottle? Or is that a whole empty bottle?!

Is there any explanation for this bizarre justaposition of objects? Probably not, but I can't help trying to figure it out!

Madison said...

doesn't the first one kind of look like sand was dumped on it?

*shudders* Oh, and the clowns on the second seriously give me the willies...they look like they're dead!

Erica said...

Ewwwwww! Where's the health dept. when you need them?

Anonymous said...

EW! Isn't this forbidden or something? Don't you have a health authority that checks on food stores?

Crazy Mommy said...

Our fillings are: Botulism, e-coli and ebola. Guaranteed to cleanse your colon and end your life. Additional flies are extra.
We'll even video tape you in your death throes for posterity. Questions or comments may be referred to management. Oh wait, they accidentally had cake for desert last night.

Anonymous said...

Is it wrong that I find the faceless bride and groom fascinating? That's the kind of cake you'd see at the creepiest wedding in the world ...

And what possible, possible occasion would need the first cake? Is there some strange public holiday that I don't know about, 'Go get naked and drunk on the beach' Day? Who would order that, and why???

Anonymous said...

that is just gross!

word verification- quing
Those cakes are definatly very quing

Gina said...

Ewwww, the close-up of the wedding cake flowers made me heave! That's just disgusting!!! Ewwwwwwww!

ksaldria said...

Oh dear God. I gagged a little reading this. Truly.

Is there something written in the "sand" on the first cake or is it just me? It looks like it says "Help" o.o

Epiphany said...

That clown cake reminds me of "It" by Stephen King.

Creepy.

ros said...

It's Miss Havisham's wedding cake!!!!

Michele said...

I think that first one is for a wife making a suggestion to her husband. Maybe that lady isn't getting enough action! (She is living on a desereted beach you know.) Okay in reality, why would you even order that cake even if it wasn't 100 years old???? lol

Array said...

I know I've seen that first one somewhere else--isn't it quite literally an antique cake, as in one someone for serious brought into Antique Roadshow? Because I know I've seen it before. Maaaan, now this is gonna bug me.

If it is, in fact, an antique cake, I don't feel right picking on it. That's like making fun of my grandmother's dress; sure, it might not be fashionable, but it's old. It deserves some respect. D:

Katie said...

Those flowers are actually disgusting.

Bobbie Leigh said...

Thank you for helping me with my diet. Everytime I crave cake, I will think of those pictures.

D.B. Echo said...

I love the Miss Havisham cake, with the fake plastic fly and the cocoa dust and cookie crumb flyspecks! Oh...wait...those are the real deal? Awesome!

I would also love to walk into the bakery and demand the Clowns On A Corroded Bronze Parade Float Cake just like they have in their window. It reminds me of the "totally metal" birthday cake from Metalocalypse, where the frosting was actually made from mercury.

holly said...

My husband says the last picture is a Mr Bill (and Mrs Bill) cake. Ohhhhh nooooo....

Anonymous said...

Even a cupcake cake, freshly made, would be better than these.

Kelley said...

I'm thoroughly disgusted. Moldy cakes still on display? NAAAASSSTTTYYY

Dingo said...

I don't know if someone already mentioned this but that second cake looks like something Mrs. Haversham would have. I hope people who order from this cake shop don't have Great Expectations.

Dingo said...

Oops, I think I said the second cake, I meant the wedding cake with the nasty "patina".

Jennifer said...

Ewwww, those melty eyes are straight out of a horror movie. The "patina" is just gross

Chrissy said...

Holy smokes, batman!

CaliGirl9 said...

Thank God for digital cameras and the ability to put together picture books of cakes instead of leaving relics lying around for potential customers.

Seriously, what do they put on these things to preserve them? Just nasty!

Anonymous said...

I'm getting married soon and will die if my cake resembles any of those. The tops ones are horrible, bleh!

Jill said...

Ewwwwwww

Pretzelogic / Philly, PA said...

Jen - no need to feel embarrassed about censoring the plastic boobs. You've chosen to create a "PG" rated blog, and done a great job of it, too. It's certainly nothing the FCC (don't pronounce THAT phonetically!) doesn't do all the time. It wouldn't surprise me if more than half of the boobs THEY'VE censored at one time or another were plastic, but that's probably a subject for a different blog... ;-)

asillylittlegirl said...

Ick! Everybody else has said it all in the previous comments.

Christina said...

This post would have been good for Halloween. There is something deeply haunting and morose about these cakes, especially the wedding ones. The moldy one reminds me of the character in "Great Expectations" that hasn't taken off her wedding dress in decades, still waiting for her groom.
These cakes are like an Edgar Allan Poe story, or a Radiohead song in cake form.
I'm going to close all the shades and cry in bed now.

Diana Kelly said...

Anyone else reminded of "Great Expectations" and Miss Havisham's moldering wedding feast?

Sleepwalker said...

There have been other CW posts that have made me think 'You have GOT to be kidding'. But this one...YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!

Love the angle on the clown cake pic, BTW: it plays up the sagging, collapsing, tilty cross-eyed horror to best advantage.

Kenya Starflight said...

One word: EWWWWWWW!

Okay, more than one word -- not only are they gross, but the clown cake looks rather lopsided...

durramirah said...

waw u make cake look cute, i lk dat...

Jungle Pete said...

CLOWN WARNING PLEASE!

Jamie said...

Those cakes and all the comments for hauntings just gave me a great display idea for Halloween and costume idea. The Zombie Bakery and Sweets! (Or should that be feet) I have a year to work on it.

The Honorable Mayor of Bethville said...

Add some rats and a crazy lady in her wedding dress, and we have a whole Dickens novel.

Squidley said...

I definitely saw the top one before as part of an auction or something for "antique cakes". There was one with a dude in a speedo lounging on a beach, too. So. So. Gross.

Anonymous said...

Oh Jen, thanks for making me laugh out loud for such a long time! I really, really needed that this morning! Love your site!

Anonymous said...

Are you sure these bakeries didn't get the idea from your July 21, 2008 post? An almost exact (and uncensored, mind you) version of the first cake (with the girl on the beach) was featured by you earlier this year.

Perhaps you've merely triggered an interest in "historic" cakes!

Beth A. in Silver Spring, MD

Anonymous said...

Gross!!!! The dusty cakes were somehow the worst for me.

word veri: dreary

If the shoe fits...

Anonymous said...

OMG at first I thought the first cake was a baked meringue cake. yuck

sue said...

Miss Haversham's wedding cake! How marvelous. All it needs is a few cobwebs.

By the way, this blog is just awesome! I love it.

Amanda said...

has anyone called the FDA?

Ayulsa said...

...I feel awful for those poor cakes. I admit I read this blog for the cringe factor (doesn't everyone?), but like many have said before me, I did not ever expect to actually want to throw up at a Cake Wrecks post. This is vile, and really, really sad.

Jen said...

First off: anyone would have to be totally deformed in the head to even be INTERESTED in ordering cakes from those bakeries.

Secondly, just wanted to say I absolutely LOVE your blogs! I've just created a new post on my own that links to yours!
My blog is http://thisorthat12.blogspot.com if you're interested.

Thirdly, seeing those cakes reminded me of this cake decorating shop in another town that had displays that showed really REALLY old cake designs, with all the mould, dead insects and dust included. They were open at the time (3 yrs ago), not sure if they still are...I should check out if they're still open and take some pics eh?

Protomlad said...

"It's the Silent Hill bakery! Come on down for a cake to satisfy your inner demons [i]and[/i] your sweet tooth!

Silent Hill bakery located on the corner of Disturbing and Imagery across from the dilapidated spooky movie theator.

Anonymous said...

Yikes. I didn't realize bakeries still displayed real food in their windows anymore. When I worked in a bakery all the window display cakes we made with styrofoam, plastic and clay.

Anonymous said...

"I didn't realize bakeries still displayed real food in their windows anymore."

These aren't 'real food'. They are styofoam forms decorated with real icing. Yes, they are gross, but it's not like there is a mouldering cake under there.

iheartyourguts said...

Why are there naked plastic boobs on top of rotten flowers in the first place?

Anonymous said...

the first one looks like the apocalypse

Annette said...

Eww.

No, really.

Ewww.

karo said...

Whoa!

The first two are from the same bakery, right? In New York? I used to see either those two cakes or exact replicas of them every Saturday as I passed a certain bakery on my way to Polish school. That was many years ago. Glad to see they're still around.

Corinne said...

Wow, I am another viewer who recognizes the first cake from a bakery in Brooklyn... It is so weird to see it here, immortalized forever... albeit unnecessarily, since it's obviously going to be at the bakery forever anyway.

Anonymous said...

On the moldy wedding cake photo you can see the name of a market reflected in the window. Google the market's name, click the link to google maps, and do 'street view' for that address. Across the street from the market you can see the bakery. Zoom all the way in and you can actually see that moldy cake in the display window.

Anonymous said...

Ahhh....shades of Miss Havisham

Cupcakes Lady said...

Yum... Makes me want to run right out and buy a cake! :[ x