Tuesday, March 3, 2009
"And in the Mornin', I'm Making WAFFLES."
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Clue #1: He's big, green, and lives in a swamp.
Clue #2: He's a cartoon ogre.
Clue #3: His name is Shrek.
Clue #4: He looks like this:
Ok, have you guessed who it is yet? Here comes the Wreck! (Choo choo!)
Ahem.
Ok, so it's shiny, toothy, and has a homicidal glint in its dead, dead eyes.
On the other hand, now we know what would happen if the Incredible Hulk and Sloth from the Goonies ever had a love child. Right, Michelle Y.?
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What's a Wreck?
What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
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130 comments | Post a Comment
LOLOLOLOL!!! This is much more frightening than any of yesterday's cakes. Good thing we have your humor to soften the blow.
That's so funny, just yesterday we were quoting our favorite talking donkey and the waffle line is the best!!
That cake is gross.
This is why I don't decorate cakes. I fear they would all look like this.
Slimer! With teeth!
Who ya gonna call? Cakebusters!
The only way they could have made that less Shrek-ish would have been to make it red. I couldn't stop snickering.
Oddly enough, I had the exact same lovechild thought in my head.
I would have nightmares if I ate that cake.
He's coming to get me for eating him, AHHHH!
I find the teeth most disturbing
I think I'm most disturbed by the shininess of it. Ick.
I love it! What a horrible shade of green, and what happened to his nose?! Sloth and the Incredible Hulk... bwaahhahahahahaa!!! I laughed so hard at that!
I can only say .... EWWWWWWWW.
One of my favorites! Shreck, the movie that is. NOT the cake! What a complete disaster, an absolute atrosity - but at least something to make me laugh on a Tuesday morning : - )
~ Arlynn from Fleur De Licious
I would expect to see this disembodied head on a pike on an English stone bridge as a warning to all the other ogree....
NC
You know, I admire your way with words. Some days it's not so much the cakes that are funny as it is what you say about them.
And today? Holy wow!
Thanks for providing a laugh on a fairly bad morning.
Oh my gosh! I've had nightmares that look like that! I can't imagine getting that cake as a kid, I would've been traumatized for life.
If I may draw a line from Star Trek to comment:
"What is it?"
"It's green..."
Jim Todd
Are you sure the Green Goblin wasn't in on that love child action?
This cake is awesome in the worst way possible. Love it!
Now that's a Shwreck! ;)
Looks more like Disney's Quasimoto from Hunchback with food poisoning than Shrek.
My four year old son looked at the cake and said " That´s a Shrek cake". Maybe you have to be four...
that thing lived under my bed when I was 5 years old. Bad memory to relive.
Bev
Whoa! That's horrible! Talk about nightmare-inducing!
WV: horsup - what my pony made when he saw that cake. Quite a disgusting mess to clean up..
Oh god, I hope that wasn't for a child.
It looks more like Dobby from Harry Potter......in green! Shiny green Shiny, toxic green...
You know.. I always read this (even if I've seen the wrecks earlier in the day) when I'm having a bad day at work... but it took everything in my power not to laugh out loud in my cube. Bad plan.
They should have stuck with a parfait.
Maybe the overhead view looks more like Shrek. Like, uh, about 5 miles overhead? Aerial, as it were? No, still not? Well, I tried.
Are you sure it's not a jello mold?
HAHA! I sloth! HA!
HEY YOU GUUUUUYYYYYS!
I love the love child thing because that is SO DEAD ON!
Looks like an Orc on a really good day...
And hey, let's not judge this cake by its exterior. Donkey wisdom suggests that everything has layers...
Is freaky.
But...but...Shrek is actually cute. And this is a....monster.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
This is why these company's copyright their images and we're not suppose to make them in cake... to prevent stuff like this. LOL The decorator should have refused to make this for "copyright" reasons. This could have been avoided.....LOL.
I think the frilly doily was a nice touch.
That is just scary and gross and just funny...LOL!!
I would have placed my bets that cake was Yoda. Eat this cake, you will.
That is bad, hideous even. I am sure Shrek would approve
I don't even want to know what you have to do to a cake to get it that SHINY!!!
Yike!
Can't be Shrek.
It's a goblin from World of Warcraft game!
Take a look at this face and see if you don't see the similarity:
http://www.wowwiki.com/Image:Goblin_face.png
Well it would be if it had pointy ears.
lol
oh dear! I cake should never, NEVER be that shiny!
The mouth and teeth on this cake are enough to give me nightmares for a longgggg time.
is it a CCC on top of all this gross?
It's probably closer to William Steig's original rendition of Shrek
And a rough quote - from (bad) memory: "his mother was ugly and his father was ugly, but Shrek was uglier than the two of them put together"
This is pretty much uglier than any two of anything put together!
so...much...green....GAHHHH!!! how does one make such a shinny green color?! eww.
ba-by ruuuth?
Yikes.
Baaaaaaaby Ruuuth. That's some awesome stuff and an extremely ugly cake, I would be seriously worried for my health if I ate that..
It's actually a rather good interpretation of the original Shrek from the book written by William Steig.
Google "shrek steig" to make your own comparison.
Oh. My. Dear. LORD.
I can't believe how horribly wrong that cake went!! It’s awesome!
He slimed me.
Here's my homemade Shrek Wrek:
http://allergickid.blogspot.com/2008/04/shrek-cupcakes.html
Even worse, I'm afraid that "mud" look to the frosting was deliberate. At least I wasn't being paid for my lapse in judgement!
Wow... this blog is so amazing! I don't really read blogs regularly, but this is just too hysterical to resist. I even blogged about it on my own site! (www.utterrandom.blogspot.com) Keep up the good, wrecky work!
That wasn't even a college try there...horrible!
Daily Gif Blog
DB
are you sure it's not the toxic avenger?
Aww, come on! SCHWRECK!
I can't get over how shiny the Shwreck is. Is he actually made of molded plastic?
i never thought Shrek could look sooo scary!
Wonder how much those parents have spent on therapy so far...
I don't know, maybe the Wrecker is just extremely literate and decided to devote this cake to the original book by William Steig. It looks a lot like the original Shrek. Or maybe I'm just giving the Wrecker far too much credit...
You keep upping the ante on badness! Where will it end? The best still is the "We Love Freymot..."
I'll have to go bake something awful now.
OMG the cake is sooo bad, but your captions are so priceless!!! Thanks for the laugh
Hugs
Amy
Oh Wow! That is really awful!!!
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Mommy, make it go away! Thank you for the humor and build-up to soften the blow, because I could not have handled seeing the cake straight off w/o any warning. O_o *shuddertwitch* My vote is for Steig's Shreck, because that is *not* Movie!Shrek.
Wow! Is that even edible!?
It appears to have been varnished!
HAHA! I have to assume that this decorator is either grossly untalented, or has never seen a picture of Shrek.
I am usually just a lurker but had to comment. that is so BAD! Yikes.
I love your blog, keep up the great work - it puts a smile on my face all the time =)
I agree with the poster that said it looked more like William Steig's original illustrations. I thought the same thing when I first looked at it. He was pretty ugly.
Wow, that doesn't even compare. Poor Shrek...
AAAAHHH!!!! I love Shrek 2 as no adult should! I quote this line every weekend when I make waffles! I think I need serious help, but this cake may just scare it out of me!!! :)
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
IT LOOKS LIKE SMIEGEL FROM LORD OF THE RINGS ONLY IN GREEN~~~ AHHH i want one???? NOT!!!!!!
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
We don't know. The cake could be right on, if the instructions were "A Shrek cake, but I want it to look really Ogre-y."
Well, if they were ugly ogre then they got it!!!
My son would be hard-pressed to identify this shiny, green monstrosity...and he's a hard-core Shrek fan! It looks like shaped puss. Mmmm, puss cake...
So what exactly is the cake supposed to be??? Your clues, though funny, weren't helpful enough for me to decipher what the green slime is supposed to be.
Yikes! that's S-C-A-R-Y!!!
Hey, well, you know, you're always prettier, handsomer, taller and wittier when they make a movie of you.
WV: picidis -- the director said, picidis guy to play the ogre.
No. Just no. That is NOT Shrek. No.
That's insane. Someone take the airbrush away NOW!
I feel sorry for the kid who had it for their birthday cake! SCARY!
I just love to carefully, slowly, scroll down the page, savoring your commentary that primes me for the reveal of the latest wreck. You are a genius.
Word Ver = cookescr, the sound a customer makes when they see the wreck they have just paid too much money for
I.....um.....
Okay, so, bottom line it looks like a frog and a demeon mixed with frosting.
When there's somethin' gross, at the birthday bash, who you gonna call?
Cakebusters!
That cake isn't Shrek. It's Mr. Yuk's brother.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLsONa3gKIQ
Because I think that cake could make someone SICK, SICK, SICK!!
Great commentary, as always! :)
He looks kind of like a green Gollum...I can just hear it whispering, "Precioussssss..."
Or something along those lines. xD
Aja
I always expect to see something totally WRONG when I scroll down for the wreck, but this one made my jaw drop.
Is this the way Shrek looks in the morning before he showers and shaves?
That cake is so horrifying that it's hilarious!
If it was a bit more brown it would look like Sid from the Ice Age movies.
I'm laughing, but I probably ought not...it's really quite disturbing. I'm super grateful for the hints, because I just don't see Shrek in that wreck AT ALL.
What's funny is that it doesn't look like Shrek OR a cake. It looks like...a scary green jello...something...gone awry.
This one could've gone under yesterday's post of traumatizing the children too...
OMG!! LOL!!! Do these wreckerators not believe in cake transfers? I would have demanded an apology along with my refund!
Looks like an alt I played in EQ a dozen years ago.
whats the meaning of this??
"BRING me the HEAD of the CREATURE from the BLACK LAGOON!
On a PLATTER!!
Or your firstborn shall DIE!!!
And don't forget to use a doily!!!!
Now, GO--ChopChop! You have until the stroke of midnight!"
(...mission accomplished?)
>^??^<
OMG I don't even know what to say about that! That's just baaaad.
It looks like smegal D:.
kinda looks like a house elf from HP...
Oh god, it's a Shrek Wreck!
This is very obviously a goblin, not an ogre. The chin is the marking.
AAHHH! as soon as i saw the name of this post, i freaked. 1 of my favorite movie quotes ever!!!!! we needed a shrek-wreck.....thanks jen!!!!!!!!!
It looks more like one of the mean gremlins fed after midnight in the movie "Gremlins"! Only green.
Something about his dead-eyed stare, combined with that ridiculous grin, sets off all my giggle triggers. Heeheeheehee!
Dermingl: What Shrek's skin does as it slowly dissolves and mixes with the acid gloop covering his face. Or at least, that's what it looks like.
Oh my God! That is the ugliest cake I've ever seen. I don't think I could eat that...the green...the black...the ugly face...UGH!
Seems Shrek paid a visit to the local nuclear plant. That probably explains the shine and the mutated face.
I don't know about you, but I'd take dead blue elephants, dead pig butts, and the headless bobby soxer anyday over this!
---Bree
Hulk and Sloth love child??!? Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!
Oh dear
Sloth love Chunnnnnnnk.
Are you sure that's not supposed to be a Vogon?
TOO FUNNY! It looks like those green things in The Secret World of Og!
Oh, my God...that is hilarious. I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!
He looks like the "Green-head-on-the-wall" wizard on the Wizard of Oz!!!
*cringes* They expect you to actually eat that?! O_O
oh my..that cake looks like a galum (spelling) from lord of the rings....
Mother of God! That is horrifying!
It's Yoda's beatnik brother. See it, with the little thin beard? "Hey, all you Jedi cats and kittens..."
Regarding the "Incredible hulk/Sloth" comment, I only have 3 words: "Hey You GUUUUUYS!"
Ryan P
Shrek got hit with something; just can't figure out what.
~Amy B
I immediately thought "WoW goblin" too. Maybe I've been playing too much World of Warcraft.
OH MY! That is the most sick cake I ever seen!
I love to see that you get so many comments :) keep up the good work, and thanks for posting!
I submitted this. It was just as grotesque in person. The eyes were very gelatinous and wiggly like jello and they were yellowish. It was for my three year old daughter's birthday. None of the kids seemed to care but we adults laughed (I even laughed after I got over being so annoyed about it).
And as gross as it looks it was actually REALLY tasty.
-Michelle
I didn't know Peas and Boogers was a Crayola color.
HOLY CRAP!! This may be the worst wreck yet. For realz. :S
Does anyone else see E.T.? I'm laughing so hard I'm crying, but I'm sure I see E.T. ... after too much space radiation.
It looks like the goblins from World of Warcraft.
My kids always complain that I never laugh out loud... unless I'm reading your blog, then I just can't hold it in. Too funny.
That Shrek cake looks scary!
I showed my 3-year old (a HUGE Shrek fan) this cake.
Me: Who's this?
him: (blank stare)
Me: (scrolling up to picture of Shrek) Who's this?
him: Strek!
Me: (scrolling back down) OK, now who's this?
him: (blank stare)
There you have it. It's officially not "Strek"
Just don't feed it after midnight, get it wet, or leave it out in the sun.
Conjoined twin mutant turtles that just a minute ago were on top of the Empire State Building but are now on Shrek's head.