Tuesday, September 23, 2008

My Youngest Wreckporter

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

"Now let's kick it over to our newest Wrecks correspondent Violet, who is currently on location at her sister Ruby's third birthday party. Violet?"

"Jen, I'm sitting here in witness to the worst Wreck I've seen in my admittedly young life. Take a look at the disaster area left behind by what could only be called a Disney Princess Explosion.

"As you can see, there is airbrushing, hearts, garland, blobbular "rosebuds", and green leaves growing UP the "waterfall" - not to mention the fact that you have to clear off all the toys before you can even cut the thing! And don't get me started on those three '3' candles - I may only be 10 months old, but even I know that math doesn't add up."

"Wow, Violet, isn't that kind of harsh? I mean, the colors are pretty."

"Pretty? Pretty?!? Obviously you aren't seeing the matching Princess plates, napkins, cups, giftwrap... Do you see this hat I'm wearing, Jen?"



"I think it's Tinkerbell."

"No, it's a representation of the blatant over-commercialization that is running rampant in our society, that's what it is. Would you like to hear my dissertation on the breaking down of social conventions by the media barons?"

"Oh, look at the time! Sorry Violet, but we need to wrap this up."

"No problem; time for my nap anyway. Hey, Mom! Guess who needs a fresh diaper? Eh? Hey, what is that? Oh heck no, I am NOT wearing a Princess themed diaper! No, absolutely not! You're making a mockery of my beliefs, woman! Get that away from me!"

"That was Violet, my youngest Wreckporter, folks!"


Cassie F. (aka Mom), don't worry; she'll love that hat by the time she turns 3.
Poetikat said...

I think the ice is melting in Walt Disney's cryo-chamber! He's trying to say something... "That was never MY vision!" he says. Poor guy, he never should have witnessed that. Luckily, he's thawed out just enough to spin. Eternally.

Kat

Jessie said...

Too funny. She does looked very cheesed off!

Dee said...

In defense of the cake decorator (having once been one myself), I can tell you that's pretty darn close to what the kit instructions tell you to do. I can also tell you that I always despised having to put 8 lbs. of neon icing all over this cake. As for the rest of the "coordinating" partyware, that's Mom's fault for making it a Wrecktastic party.

Ethan, Zach, and Emma's Mom said...

LOL! That was awesome, I just about spit my waffle all over my computer! Violet's commentary was RIGHT ON!
Esther

Melanie said...

Yeah, but I'll bet that Ruby is STILL talking about her awesome princess cake!!!!

Linnea said...

oh! OH! that's so perfect!

a MOCKERY OF MY BELIEFS! :D

Claire said...

I pretty much pulled the same face as the baby when I saw the cake.

The baby's adorable, too ^^

Bethany said...

Holy Princess Cake Batman! Violet has the cutest "stink eye" face I have ever seen. Your wit always brightens my day.

Bess

fluffy cow said...

SO funny!!!! The pic of Violet was better than the wreck!!!

The Robinsons said...

The look on her face is priceless, and even funnier when paired with your snarky quips!

clueuin said...

That's right! LOL
Good reporting Violet, you have a future as a reporter @ the Villiage Voice in New York!

Soooooo, Cute!!!!!!

Ha,ha,ha!

;)

It's just a case of too much of a good thing, jen. ;)

Peace,
Clueuin
http://wwwmrclueuinbrooklynrules.blogspot.com/

Lis Garrett said...

A little over the top, true, but I know my three year old would have LOVED this cake. :-)

Olga said...

wow, my first time commenting and I'm number one :)

Great blog. Awesome pictures: they make me laugh all the time!

Lorraine said...

Violet's expression says it all. "I could burp up a better cake!"

Amanda said...

It may be wrecktastic, but my 6 yr old twin daughters would freaking love that cake. lol

pika23 said...

ohh I love that cake!

writtenwyrdd said...

Garish hardly covers it. But, despite the need for sunglasses, I would probably have loved this cake when I was three, and that's who it was marketed for. So I'm not sure it's exactly a Wreck.

Princeton McKinney said...

Wow what wrecktaculious reporting Violet. I'm in perfect agreement. What's with the THREE giant THREE candles anyway? I thought Ruby was THREE not 333. Yeah I get it Three Three's for Three.

No I don't really get it.

(PS pardon me but my comma key is broken.)

Anonymous said...

Is that baby letting her feelings show or what! Too cute. The colours on that cake is an overload of sweet. Ech.

~Amy B

Anonymous said...

My favorite part is how the princesses have all wet themselves in rainbow hues!
And that baby...she's got the perfect "what the %$*#" look!

leslie said...

Now really, at 333 years old you'd think she'd appreciate a bit more decorum than Disney Princesses.
Oh wait that's just gross misuse of candles.

Anonymous said...

I'm with Lis, it's over the top for me but to 3 year old girls that love princesses, this cake is perfect.

No, it's not elegant or beautiful but I don't think it's a "wreck". Still loved the commentary.

Anonymous said...

Ruby still talks about that cake (it was the BEST ever!) and the extra cheesey princess stuff was my way of giving in to the extra cheesey cake. (If you can't beat them, join them!)
And Violet's expression matched ours exactly. Everyone but Ruby had that look when we looked at the cake!
Two months later she chose "Snow White" as her halloween costume.

Cassie (aka MOM)

beth said...

My new ruling: You either have the nunber candle, or you have enough traditional birthday candles to equal the age. Not both.

The only exception is the first birthday, when the number one candle may be used solo, which would also equal the age.

And, yeah, that does look like a three-year-old girl's ideal birthday cake. It's not elegant, by any means, but it's bright and colorful and has lots of pretty toys. Still seems a little over-the-top, and I bet the birthday girl would've been happy with just one princess.

nashvillejen said...

I think what Violet is trying to tell us is that her diaper doesn't stink as much as that over the top cake does!
Ruby was probably almost 4 by the time they got all that stuff off the cake to just cut it!

Amanda said...

Oh yes - that is hilarious!!!

Jennifer said...

Coffee coming out of my nose = painful! The look on Violet's face = priceless! Was I wrong to view this first thing in the morning? Probably. Do I regret it? Not on your life!!

Erica said...

Wow. I saw the exact same cake at Chuck-E-Cheese this weekend for a kid's birthday party. (I thought the waterfall was a big melty smear that hadn't been done right.) Dee is right on the money!

And I think Violet would be my best friend if she were a teeny bit older. I hate Disney princesses too 8)

moderndayhermit said...

As much as it sucks, birthday parties are about the kids and what they will like and NOT about the adult's sense of style.

Bummer.

Given some of the monstrosities that have graced these pages I'd say this is by far nothing in comparison.

Liz C said...

Gawd, I made that cake so many times I could probably still make it in my sleep. It was the most popular girl's birthday cake in The Book at the time. And a PITA to boot.

Each princess stood in the center of an airbrushed circle, which I just now realized almost looks like they wet themselves and the color bled out of their dresses.

But girls love them some Disney princesses, you know....

Alisa Knits! said...

Wow, way to teach kids about positive body image and size issues. If any of those princesses had those actual waist dimensions, they'd snap in half!

sharalyns said...

Ok, I'm sorry, but with the 3 "3" candles, all I can think of is the t-shirt that has 3 "3s" in a row stating below it, "I'm only half evil"....
http://www.whatonearthcatalog.com/graphics/products/regular/AT5702T.jpg

Are mom and dad stating something about poor Ruby?

miki said...

That baby is appalled. Appalled.

sciencegirl said...

Is there any actual cake under all that decoration? My favorite part of cake is the cake. Some of these offerings seem to forget this essential part.
-Nancy

beth said...

the look. the look. it's priceless! what the ___ am i doin' here? children should never be exposed to that much icing. my favorite cake as a child, and remains to this day, was a yellow cake with chocolate icing with m&ms lovingly placed around the perimeter by my sweet momma. still request it.

phillygirl64 said...

OMG, someone give me an insulin shot...STAT

Yeah, I think my one grandniece, who just turned 7 would probably love it, but on the bright side, her older sister declared on Saturday that she loves camoflage

Deaf Brown Trash Punk said...

that baby looks so pissed off and grossed out.

Trevor said...

It looks like an Americolor catalog threw up on that cake!

Anonymous said...

When I looked at this cake, the two ads in the sidebar were both for counter terrorism training. For some reason, I find that terribly funny. Perhaps gobs of neon icing and over-hyped cartoon characters can be used to repel suicide bombers???

Monique in TX

Going Crazy In Michigan said...

no no no, i got this same cake for my daughters third birthday 2 weeks or so ago and mine is even worse then hers.
heres a photo.

http://s73.photobucket.com/albums/i229/arae8419/?action=view&current=2008_09070036.jpg





I was especially pleased (just kidding) with the way they scrunched the happy birthday message into such a tiny space.

thank god my daughter doesnt notice these things, but that cake was a $30.00 disappointment.

My Ice Cream Diary said...

I love how the air brushing under each princess makes it look like the dresses are bleeding onto the cake.

mr.sound and mrs.sound said...

They are one cutie babies.
www.foodista.com

Danielle said...

To the people saying that it looks like it should/not a wreck, please get your eyes checked.

http://www.decopac.com/detail_16358__1-1-1.html

Chel said...

My almost three year old would go BONKERS over that cake. As soon as she gets home from school I'm going to show her the picture and see what her reaction is. And we've done everything in our power to keep her away from the whole "Princess" thing. It's powerless to even try and fight it.

Ashleigh said...

I think my 15th birthday cake looked like that...except without all the rainbow icing and airbrushing.

sues2u2 said...

Ditto to pretty much all of the other comments. LOL !! My daughter wanted a cake like that once. We compromised & I made a castle instead. Much less sugar!

Anonymous said...

This is priceless! I just started working at a grocery store with in-house bake shop. Last week, I think Friday night(9/19), the baker was showing off a cake to be picked up for Saturday.

It was this cake!

I took one look and wished I had a camera! It was wreck-a-licious!

I cannot believe it's here!

Twistie said...

I think I have figured out why the three candles are psychadelic: you have to be either three years old or stoned out of your tiny mind to like this cake.

Luckily Ruby will grow up.

Violet's commentary was spot on and absolutely priceless. I look forward to her next guest appearance.

Shannon said...

I hate to admit, but my daughter had the EXACT same cake for her 4th or 5th birthday. We live in a small town so i had to use the local grocery store. Ours maybe was not that bad but bad enough.
Shannon

jenn said...

I would have looooove to have received that cake at 3 years old.

I think the very young and the very old are completely entitled to have or wear obnoxiously loud and tacky items.

Gina said...

Absolutely awesome!!
Violet should be paired up with Stewie. LOL

Lindsey said...

I've always hated the "generic Disney princess!" thing. It's stupid. When I was younger, if you had a favorite Disney movie you could get a t-shirt with your favorite princess on it, dress up as Jasmine or Pocahontas or whatever. Now they just take their merchandise and stick 3 or 4 princesses on it and call it a day. Do you like Sleeping Beauty? Well too freaking bad, because she has to share a spot on the shirt with 4 other princesses. They're not individuals, they're all just random generic princesses! Who cares what they're names are!

I think it's ridiculous. Who would want that kind of merchandise?

Jules said...

The expression on that kids face is a classic!

Alphamum said...

But surely Mom is a fan of bright colours, having named her kids Violet and Ruby . . . .!

Wow - that cake! At first I thought there was something up with the colour settings on my screen!

Here in the UK, I don't really think we have the same 'cake culture' as in the States - at least there isn't the same 'bake house' supermarket thing happening when you can phone in an order. Some of the bigger supermarkets will print a photo onto an icing sheet and sell the cake it goes on and some small independent bakeries take orders for cakes but nothing like the scale you have over there. It's amazing - I am addicted to this site!

Kierra said...

I've actully decorated a handfull of those cakes. It's a god-awful design, but believe me when I say the Hanna Montana design is worse.

Of course, this decorator looks like she used the largest tips available. I had no idea #32 tip came in "jumbo" size"

~Kia

Mamalemma said...

Well of COURSE you have to have a whole bunch of toys and candles on the cake. You've got to have one lick-able thing on the cake for each child at the birthday party to avoid the inevitable throw-downs over who gets to lick the stuff that comes off it. (And then we use it again? Ewwwwwww! And yes, I'm totally guilty of that, too!)

On a totally unrelated note, if my word verification was on a license plate, I would read it "whitey giggles." (wtygglz) :-)

Anonymous said...

I am soooooo glad I have a boy & do not have to suffer through Disney princesses.

All hail Transformers & Power Rangers!

- Mo's mom

Ronnica said...

Cute baby face!

I love the way that the princesses' dresses bleed into the cake...

kitchenrefugee said...

"Disney Princess Explosion"!!

Priceless commentary.

I am so grateful that my girls are not girly girls...

Sheri in Rehoboth said...

Violet, methinks you have a bright future ahead as a blogger or political commentator. Keep up the good work!

Dea said...

BWAHA! I love Violet's face - sooo awesome!!! She is probably thinking of that diaper's contents and the colors that may appear....lmao

Amazing the things kids will pick for their cakes....ick!

Julie said...

Yeaaaaaaa Cassie, Ruby & Violet! We love our girls here in Ohio!!

Jennifer said...

Hey, I used to work at a grocery store bakery where we made this cake, and it looks EXACTLY how the instructions tell us to do it. Gaudy and all.

-Jen

Jenni said...

That was utterly amusing. That little baby's face made my day.

Persnickety Ticker said...

So I have now spent the whole morning looking all over the internet on where to buy those cake toppers because my daughter would just squeal with glee to get that cake. She is all about the princess thing.

Table for Seven said...

That cake is one more reason to count by blessings. With five sons and no daughters, we won't ever have to worry about that "wreck" ending up in our house.

Teri said...

Hilarious. Violet is a star!

Stephanie said...

Yep-if I didn't hate them already -now I really do...hate the Disney Princesses. You go Violet!

Anonymous said...

I think that you have to consider the recipient. An adult might not like this cake (I personally think it's fun), but I'll bet most little girls would love it.

Big Red said...

Violet is my hero! When I grow up I want to be a strong, proud woman like her.
Great post!

Elvira said...

Less Is More. A lesson important enough to teach to a child as young as three. Oh. By the way. All 4 of those Princesses had a dead or absent mother in the story. Happy Birthday!! Not.

Kara said...

My daughter insisted on this cake for her birthday! But, she's 5 years old, and her taste is questionable at best.

Juliet said...

My favourite part is the look of disgust on the baby's face. LOL!

writtenwyrdd said...

So...clarify something for a non-decorating type: These cakes are in some Cake Bible, and it's listed in there as something like a "#47 Princess Cake in Neon Tongue-Staining Colors"? Which is used by many Big*Store bakeries?

The things you learn...

diddlesgirl said...

did no one else notice that the matching color flowers (roses?) behind the princesses looks like they left a trail of matching poo behind them? i kept waiting for Violet to point out that she would NOT like a slice from behind the princesses!
of course i am sure my two-year old would have loved this cake - but when your aunt is a baker, you only get to name your theme and your aunt makes that theme as tasteful and beautiful as possible.

Anonymous said...

I'm most offended that they left out Jasmine, although I guess Snow White's not on there either.

Manders said...

You are too funny, girl!! Thanks for the laughs!!

At least they put Belle on it!! (She's my fave!)

Duehicky said...

Sleeping beauty is wearing pink. That's enough of a disaster for me. Stop lying to yourselves Disney, her dress was blue the entire movie, get over it. I hate pink, blue is better.

:-)

Anonymous said...

its a set that is designed by one of the biggest cake toy makers out there - DecoPac. and the design is pretty damn close to how it is supposed to look. i think in this case you're a little off base. it was made to look like this as per the manufacturer of the set. it isnt the decorators fault. i mean yea, the execution is a tad sloppy, but its not that bad. i guess you ran out of real cake wrecks to day eh man?

Anonymous said...

gotta love all the self-congratulatory "Thank GOD I have BOYS so I don't have to look at princess cakes!" comments. Yeah, cuz them GI Joe and Transformers and Spiderman and Pokemon are so much less offensive...sheesh...

Anonymous said...

That's what you get with cheap-ass $30 grocery cakes. You only have yourselves to blame. Go and find a talented decorator instead, sure it might cost you a bit more, but the taste of the cake & decorating talent is more than worth it!

fondantguy said...

Anonymous @ 4:23

So what you are saying is that if a cake is made correctly, it can't be gaudy or overdone? Maybe the designer is to blame. Who knows?

I can't get over Violet's face! Too funny!

Keep 'em coming!

DJ Holly Rock said...

It looks like the princesses pissed out easter egg dye underneath of themselves.

Kat said...

I love the use of a 10 month old and the angle at which you described this cake. Hilarious! and sooo true too. It's hard not to get caught up in mass media spew when you have young ones but we can try.

Keep up the great investigation and analysis!

Cake Artist said...

The cake designs that you see in the display books in your favorite grocery store are approved by the license-holder- Disney, Mattel, etc. Whatever the design is, it is one of many that was presented to the Disney people none of whom have ever decorated a cake. That is why you see so many of those cakes with inedible red borders.
We visit your blog daily and laugh ourselves sick.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Violet is also concerned about the blatant discrimination that this cake is displaying. Sure, there's a red headed princess, but where are Jasmine and pocahontas? Is 'white girls and neon' a theme?

Cattie said...

That is one opinionated baby. :)

I don't know - I think this cake is charming, especially for a 3 year old! I don't think she's too concerned with all that stuff; she's thinking something more like, "HOLY CRAP! PRINCESSES!!! AND PINK!!! AND LOOK AT ALL THE COLORS!!! OMG! DID I MENTION THE PRINCESSES??? THIS CAKE IS AWESOME!!!" Lol.

Anonymous said...

Awwww, I bet the birthday girl was so happy about that cake! I know my 3 year old would have been gushing!! It's pretty audacious but I'd say as a whole WAY better than some of the other wrecks lol. Everything is spaced evenly, spelled correctly, the writing looks nice. Ok well a rainbow DID throw up on it but she's too young to know that life isn't all rainbows and roses yet, right? lol Hey I say throw some plastic unicorns on there and she'd like it even more! hehe

Chromesthesia said...

extreme technocoloured brightness
Imagine if the princesses danced around in little circles on the cake.

ValGal said...

All I have to say is concerning the use of the candles. Thank goodness she wasn't turning 6! hehe

Spencer and Kami said...

What a face she has!!! Haha :)

Chris said...

So this clearly needs to start an off-shoot website. Who's going to make FaceWrecks, collecting photos of scrunched-up baby faces now? :-)

Brianna McCarthy said...

Violet's expression is priceless! :)
Winning post as usual.

Anonymous said...

OMG funniest by far!!!

SolaMommy said...

That's the best face ever.

Stephanie said...

Some of you people are mean! It's for the birthday of a three year old little girl! She's THREE! Cassie, good on ya for all the cheesey princess stuff. I hear so many parents complaining about how ungrateful their kids are at any age. Here you have a 3 year old still gushing about a cake 2 months later! I totally understand the whole evil Disney thing and I agree about the racism and discrimination found in Disney cartoons. BUT sometimes you just can't take the princess out of a little girl. She's too young for conversations about body image and what-not just yet. Of all days to try to curtail a child's interest in something, are some of you commenters actually saying you'd do it on a little girl's 3rd birthday? Glad I'm not YOUR kids!
Is the cake a wreck? Oh yeah. But that's not necessarily a horrific thing. One of the great things about cakes is that in most circumstances, a wrecked cake can still be the hit of the party! Comparing this cake to the picture in the cake bible...it's not an exat match. I've done these kits. There are often hundreds of cakes in those books. Is it likely you're talking to a cake decorator who has made every one of them a couple of times? Not really, especially if you are at CostCo or Vons or an ice cream shop (which is where I made cakes) and not a bakery. So you place an order for a design out of the bible and maybe they have the kit instructiond and maybe they don't. This kit isn't a work of fine art to begin with and then it's placed in questionable hands (questionable because when placing an order anywhere, you don't know who'll be decorating your cake or whether they're good or not). Then, you pick up a wreck!
Cassie, I'm glad Ruby loved it and that you guys let her have her happy neon princess theme. Violet is adorable and you better watch he sharp wit! It's a dangerous thing at only 10 months olds. I fear her cake request! :P

k said...

Aw, guys. I used to work as a professional birthday party princess. I kind of love it.

Kamity said...

These princesses were the original princesses - the ones that were there BEFORE Jasmine, Pocahontas, and Mulan. (Beauty and the Beast came out the year before Aladdin.) So it makes sense that the four featured princesses would be those four.

I love how this epitomizes the sterotypical 3-year-old Princess cake (heck, *I* would have loved it at ANY time in elementary school!!!)

By its very nature, this cake is a WRECK princess-loving toddlers would ADORE. Thank you so much for sharing!!!!

Amy said...

Love the names Violet and Ruby! And while ugly, I LOVE to eat cakes with too much buttercream icing. Lots of icing, hold the cake. :)

Elizabeth said...

Sadly, the cake is SUPPOSED to look like that. I made four of those cakes every weekend for about a year. However, there's not supposed to be a huge shell border on the bottom or a huge amount of leaves growing up the water.
Also, the cake was for a three year old. If it were up to my three year old niece, her room would be pepto bismol pink and she'd wear her Hannah Montana wig in public every day.

Lisa said...

Ok, I'm proud to say that I had that same cake (minus the heart garland) for the past two year. I'm 25. I love Disney Princess and I picked out the cake myself. I still have the princesses.

My husband thought that this was the best wreck because it was what I had for my birthday.

Lisa

Scritzy said...

My first response to a CakeWreck:

Violet is my hero!!! That has to be the cutest "Geez, wonder what they are going to stick me with for MY birthday?!?" look I've ever seen.

You go, Violet!

And I'm sure Ruby loved not only the plastic princesses (hey, my sister is one of those) but the sugar rush as well.

chamoisee said...

I've actually made that cake several times! I think the big 3 candles helped ruin it... Also, the rose buds aren't positioned correctly, and in my opinion, the cake cannot be done well on a 1/4 sheet size. It pretty much *has* to be done on a 1/2 sheet to look good, or there's just no room for writing. Many of the cake kits are that way, too much stuff in too small a space.

The cake is (according to the directions) supposed to have light airbrushing to match the three princesses, a rose to match each one, and a trio of rosebuds (one of each color) in each lower corner. The mermaid should be sitting in blue gel to look like water, with seaweed rising up the front side of the cake (yeah, I know) to encircle the water somewhat. Seems like the three icing colors also get used on the borders. This cake is a pain to make in a hurry if you have to switch out tips and icing colors due to working in a stingy bakery.

MangyCat said...

Absolutely brilliant! Love this one. It was really fun to read and WOW, what a picture. I'm sure you couldn't pass it up.

MangyCat

Helen said...

To whoever said that they were the original Disney princesses....what about Snow White or Cinderella? And who is that in the pink anyway? Cinderella's dress was white in the film if I remember correctly.
I remember those three princesses from when I was a child - these upstarts such as Belle and Ariel are newbies in comparison!

Anonymous said...

If you must have the six princess' go to decopac.com. There is a Princess Castle Cake that features the four on this cake and Jasmin and Snow White. Just for those that needed to know that.

holly said...

Even if Snow White is one of the original Princesses, I wouldn't want her on *my* cake. Her dress isn't pretty or fluffy, she doesn't have a pretty updo OR long flowing locks, she was a total wimp in the woods terrified of TREES. Plus, she shacked up with 7guys, used them and then took off when something 'prettier' came along.

The Hatter said...

Much :lol:ing.

She does look very unhappy about it.

<"Eh? Hey, what is that? Oh heck no, I am NOT wearing a Princess themed diaper! No, absolutely not! You're making a mockery of my beliefs, woman! Get that away from me!">
xD Awesome!

Get that Wrecktastic cake away from me!

Tracy said...

Man, princess controversy! I'm 24 and I'll admit I still love all the Disney princesses. And to clarify, while Snow White is the OG princess, she was followed by Aurora, a/k/a Sleeping Beauty (in pink), Cinderella (in blue), Ariel (mermaid), and Belle (in yellow). Jasmine and Pocahontas came later. There's only room for so many princesses on each garish cake. And as wreck-y as this cake is (especially compared to how it's really supposed to look), I'd probably love it anyway because I'm still 8 years old inside :D

Barb said...

As much as I love seeing all the cake wrecks, I have to say, this is the funniest post EVER!

clueuin said...

Going Crazy In Michigan: I get it. I get it. You nickname pretty much says in all.

In other news....

30 dollers for that cake!

Gurl, you must love your daughter!

Peace,
Clueuin

clueuin said...

O.k, let me put this all in perspective for ya'll.
When I was three my birthday cake was a cupcake (one) with a candle in it. My mom and my sister sang happy birthday to me.
Yeah!
So yeah wreaktastic cake for an adult....
Somebody's dream cake when their three.
Me, I wanted, well I don't remember what I wanted because I was three. The reason the memory stuck with me was the fact that my mom was singing at me and I think that was my earlist memory of her singing.
Well, umm
Peace,
Clueuin

Kaye said...

Duehicky: That's not actually true. Sleeping Beauty's dress changes back and forth between blue and pink throughout the time she's wearing it (and while it's being made) because Flora and Merryweather each want it a different colour, so they keep changing it.

Violet is the cutest little thing I've ever seen in my life! I'm pretty sure I'd have that look on my face too if I saw cake, but I'm also sure I would have loved it when I was 3!

Amber said...

I SERIOUSLY had this exact same cake for my daughter's birthday party last year... I was shocked at the atrocious neon icing (which undoubtedly ended up staining everything it touched), but my daughter loved it. Go figure.

As an added bonus, the plastic princesses became toys which ended up lodged in the toilet.

JennyF said...

My friend had a similarly designed cake for her 2-year-old...and eventually got to clean blue poop out of her diaper. That'll be something fun to look forward to for little Violet's mom!

Kamity said...

Oh, whoops, you're right - I forgot about Snow White. But what color would she be, anyway? Possibly yellow? Belle pulls it off so much better, and has a floofier dress. ;) I agree with the person who said they wouldn't want SW on their cake anyway. She's not quite as much of a babe as the other princesses.

The selected princesses round out the colors rather nicely (Since Cinderella can't be white, then obviously she has to be blue, which obviously means Aurora has to be pink. Right.)

I don't think I'll ever quite understand why Ariel makes the "Princess" cut (all she wears is a seashell bra!) while Jasmine doesn't, but hey, I guess Disney can't please everyone! And Pocahontas would be brown. Who would want brown on their cake?

Marcus said...

This cake is a good concept for a 3-year old, but really poor execution, way overdone. Parents should step in when this madness goes too far. Who wants to bet that this girl will have enough makeup on her face to match the cake in about eight years?

The baby? Too cute! I love this site.

Crochet by Momma J said...

Baby - cute. Cake - not so much.

Angela said...

All I can say is that I am SOOOOO glad I only have boys!!!

Chelsea said...

Sadly, this is a very common cake...ugh, it's such a pain in the butt to make, too...

Just wanted to say that it's not the poor decorator's fault...that's actually a pretty good representation of the cake oh-so-many parents get for their little princesses...Blame the people at DecoPac...

And, I think the blobular rosebuds are actually hearts...

Dea said...

Cinderella's dress WAS NOT white....yeesh! It was blue AND white....her WEDDING dress was white...

Snow White is one of the least-loved princesses, unfortunately....poor girl, she got stuck with a bob hair do....

Pocahontas isn't a princess....neither is Mulan....thus, don't deserve a place on a princess cake....

And Jasmine doesn't have a dress, so she gets nixed - though, honestly, why the half-fish girl? (Ariel is my favorite, but yeah - she doesn't mesh with the others...)

water_bearer said...

Wow. It's like baby's first acid trip. Could there BE any more colors on that cake?
Violet's face is priceless, though. What a cute baby!

KP said...

I'm an avid , cake decorator, & a first time commenter.
The DecoPac DOES indeed look similar to that, albeit that cake is done sloppily.
DecoPacs are just overkill.

Tracy said...

Hey, who says you have to wear a floofy dress to be a princess? Ariel is a princess because she's the daughter of a king. What else is she supposed to wear underwater?

Anonymous said...

Is Marcus actually suggesting that rainbow colors on a 3 year old's birthday cake leads to promiscuity? Lighten up sweetie.

Cassie F. (aka Mom)

manicpaniccomix said...

I am a professional cake decorator in a successful Boston cake shop and we have to do loads of silly princess cakes simply because THAT'S WHAT LITTLE GIRLS LIKE. Albeit a bit tacky, this wreck is almost exactly like the picture included with the princess kit. So I guess what I am saying is with so many really dumb cakes out there, why pick on a cake that is exactly what the people ordered. Is our blogger getting a little snooty towards regular, not fondant overloaded cakes? Just thought I would throw that out there.

ella said...

That was so funny. what made it so great was the totally unexpected gimick of the mock reporting and how perfectly the baby's face matched the tone. You got the chops jen!

Chelle said...

that is a grrrrrrrrrreat face!!!

holly said...

Marcus, you're kidding, right? Right...ummm...Marcus? Disney creations and pink fluff leads to promiscuity and teen tarts? Please. That cake is the dream cake of every little girl in this country.

Rob said...

One of the funniest entries yet. Thank you for bringing laughter to my day!

Anonymous said...

You guy are being unfair. This cake wasn't meant to please an adult. Most little girls will love this!
Kinda like I love your blog!

Willemijn

Anonymous said...

Danielle posted this link above http://www.decopac.com/detail_16358__1-1-1.html

OMG, they suggest a CUPCAKE CAKE, too! Two great wrecks that go great together.

Love Violet's commentary!

Dea said...

I think people are missing the point - even if it's a perfect rendition, and EXACTLY what a little girl would want - it's glaring on the eyes and really really BUSY....so yeah, it's still a wreck - it doesn't have to have fallen on the floor and been put back together and delivered to a bride to be a wreck. Tacky = wreck to me, and my boys have had a few tacky cakes themselves (think Spongebob) but it still doesn't make this any less funny.

I never said Ariel wasn't a princess....she's just not in her dress, and thus does not "go" with the other girls - she and Jasmine could have their own, no-dresses-allowed cake! LOL!

Oh, and Marcus? WAY WAY WAY WAY off base - I was always a princess fan, Disney fan - and I waited a LONG time to lose the big V, and I never dressed slutty - so you lose, theory in the toilet....maybe we'll get you the cake from that other post....

Calantha said...

Wow. Just. . . .wow. I can see how a 3-year-old would go bonkers, but ow ow ow ow, eyesore just the same!

To the person who said the Hannah Montana cake was worse, find a picture of one and share! I refuse to believe this cake could be topped that easily in terms of Disney-themed, neon-saturated wreck-ness.

Jenna said...

that was hill-arious! i love this site!

Anonymous said...

well, i am pregnant with my last and she's a girl (i have 2 boys)and...as horrible as this cake is...well, i am actually looking forward to having a cake like this! i think it would be a blast to have! what little girl wouldn't love to get her dream cake? and that one is way up there!
love the baby's expression! too cute!

Emily said...

Agreeing with Dee...its REALLY close to the actual kit design. I decorated cakes for 2 years...and some of the "kits" are absolutely obnoxious, covered in toys, sprinkles, airbrush..you name it...and people order them like crazy...most popular were ones similar to this one and the "CARS" cake. and seeing as I quit 2 years ago, and still see that same design in superwalmart all the time....*shakes head* haha

Adina said...

That's a particularly atrocious cake.

Ruby and Violet are beautifully named, however.

RubySeesAll said...

Just another good example of offensive grocery store cake kits done badly. The borders and everything are just so huge. From experience though, I do remember this wrecktastic cake being ever so popular during my slave labor work at the grocery store bakery.(looks down shamefully.) Thank goodness I was making good ol' minimum wage to make it worth my time!!

I just found this site and think it's awesome, great concept. Keep up the great work because your stuff always cracks me up.
Thanks,
~Ruby~

bionelly said...

I think I might know why Jasmine, Snow White, Pocahontas and Mulan were left off this cake: they all wear either pants or dresses that aren't floor-length, which means they would have had to use a stand in order to be stable. Floofy dresses and rocks to pose on provide a nice wide base, so you don't have to have an extra chunk of plastic to make them stand up. I guess they could have made bases for them to pose on like they did with Ariel, but I just don't think it would have looked as natural.

As far as what a Elvira said about them all having dead mothers, I'm pretty sure that's true for all the princesses. Don't put all the blame on Disney for that, though: apparently when the Brothers Grimm collected most of these stories, they changed the mothers to stepmothers to avoid offending people by showing mothers as anything other than wonderful people who only have their childrens' best interests at heart. Of course, that doesn't explain all of the Disney characters, since a few aren't based on Grimm stories and some have no mother figure at all, but maybe once they got into the pattern with Snow White and Cinderella, they just continued it.

As for those who are bemoaning the use of commercialized princesses, all I can say is, check out the original versions of these stories sometime. Yeah, it would be nice if they'd put on some weight, but I'd still rather expose my daughter to the Sleeping Beauty with a tiny waist and her image plastered on 20 billion products than the one whose story comes complete with rape, adultery and cannibalism.

All that said, I'd agree that this is at least a marginal wreck. The kid may have liked it, but I think there have been quite a few wrecks here that were exactly what was ordered (I have trouble imagining that whoever ordered the head cake didn't know exactly what they were getting, for example, not to mention all the "all occasions" cakes). Tackiness is one thing that can definitely make a wreck, and this cake has more than its share. Still, I don't think it would have made the cut without Violet.

V-Babe said...

Kaye: Yes. I've seen the movie. But they sell crap with her wearing pink and I hate pink but like Sleeping beauty and would prefer it blue. She wore blue all the way until the ending sequence when they fought over the color. They make her wear pink b/c of cinderella. Who actually had a pink dress! lol.

Nicole said...

Sadly, as I was looking at this horrid monstrosity, my 4yr old ran in and her first words were "OH MY GOD MOM I WANT THAT CAKE!!11eleven".

Meh. I see I have failed at teaching her cake aesthetics.

Kay said...

as an ex-cake decorator, I agree that this cake is done exactly as the kit instructions say. A small fact... It's one of the most popular cake kits in northern Wisconsin.

We love our Disney.

Lauliet said...

Okay, here's the creepy part. I'VE SEEN A CAKE LIKE THAT IN PERSON! I work at a grocery store and I remember someone purchasing it! So I've either had an encounter with that cake, or there are more of them. They're SPAWNING!

whizkidforte said...

That is the most garish Disney cake ever - but it's very funny! LOL!!! XD!

Jenn said...

I'm young, too! I was 10 when I started reading this blog (11 now)

Cupcakes Lady said...

Lol That baby looks so pissed off and grossed out....brilliant ;) xx