I can think of a few things that might make Chuck Norris cry:1) Seeing this cake
2) Having his body in the position pictured (since his spinal cord would have to be severed from twisting 180 degrees).
3) Realizing that his fan base has degenerated into noodle-armed cubicle-dwellers who honestly think the only difference between them and him is a big gun and a pair of 80’s aviator glasses.
Sorry, Chuck.
UPDATE: Many thanks to alert reader Penny for pointing out the spelling mistake on "doesn't"! [wiping eyes] My little Cake Wrecks readers - all grown up and spotting errors on their own!
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You find bizarre his position ...I agree But I find more bizarre what is written on the cake! what a lovely and nice wish :)
OMG. Can't remember how I found you, but I SO adore your blog. Thanks for all the intensely needed laugh-until- I-cry moments.
Just hoping none of MY cakes show up here.
So is this cake *for* Chuck Norris, or just *about* Chuck Norris? Also, that isn't even Chuck - where's the beard?
I think the spelling of doesn't would make him cry too.
Keep up the good work! Thanks for finding horrible cakes for everyone to laugh at!
I just recently stumbled on this blog - omg you're hysterical. Where do you find this stuff?
I have $10 that this cake is for a pre-pubescent boy and that his parents own a confederate flag.
Also, I'm probably related to said pre-pubescent boy.
Will someone stop this whole "Chuck Norris doesn't" meme? Now, pls? It's 32 different flavors of FAIL.
Is anyone else bothered by a cake sentiment that is basically scolding the birthday boy? They might as well have written "and clean your room!" on it as well.
OMG! WHERE is Chuck Norris's facial hair? WTF?
For more bonus points of badness note that the "Chuck Norris" on the cake looks a lot more like Rambo-era Sylverster Stallone than it does (or is that "doses"?) the Chuckster.
Denigrated? Did you mean "degenerated"?
Also, that's totally not Chuck Norris...and that's the *least* of this cake's problems. Ouch.
I just discovered this weblog today, and I love it. I knew there were some scary cakes out there, but I hadn't realized how many...!
badfae,
Erm, [flipping through dictionary] well, "denigrated" IS a word, but I think you're right: I should have used "degenerated" instead. Heh. Whoops?
Good catch. Now stop making me look bad.
;)
Best Blog ever!
Also why is Cuhck Norris wearing rose pink lipgloss?
And is that a tampon? Is he planning to roundhouse kick a tampon? Really?
The "tampon" is number candles -- and, judging by their shape, I don't believe the recipient is pre-pubescent, as steph contends...
I thought Chuck Norris looked Asian on the cake. And also very pretty. I think his arms are the only manly part of him on this cake.
I count fourteen candles as well as the number ones.
So presumably, yeah, not prepubescent.
Scuse me while I die laughing now.
I like to think that they EXPECT the birthday boy to cry, so they're basically telling him not to be a crybaby ON HIS VERY OWN CAKE.
Did anybody else notice that the "bullets" being shot at him more closely resemble tampons?
Hello! It doesn't even look like him. That's Benecio del Toro for Chrissake!
I really love the pink handle on the gun... definitely one of Chuck's trademarks.
I know it's an oldie, but Chuck's beard is missing! That's the biggest wreck of this cake :U
Guess who shares Chuck Norris' birthday!
*shifty eyes*
No, not talking about Osama Bin Laden.
*shifty*
ME!
Does that make me cool yet?
Chuck Norris looks like David Gest, "dosesn't" he?
And here I was, thinking Neo from The Matrix was starting to come out of the closet!
Ole Swivel-Hips Chuck:
wonderful at kids' parties.
Therapists concur.