Monday, May 9, 2011

Mom Gets the Last Word

Monday, May 9, 2011

There are so many ways to tell your mom what she means to you.

And after yesterday, now we know all the wrong ones.

"Of all the moms out there, you are definitely one of them."


Oh, sorry, did you want a number sign?

Nooo problem.


Yep, whether it was a misspelling...

Lovly.


... a "buy-a-vowel" special...

"I think I'll spin again, Pat."


...or even a biologically inaccurate euphemism...

Hush, Dad. Today Mom gets all the credit.

...our bakeries really plumbed the depths of mother's day messes this year.

In fact, I have lots more where those came from. So brace yourselves, wreckies:

'Cuz Mothday Day is just getting started over here. Woot woot!


Thanks to Beth I., Jeanie P., Misty Y., Allison C., Mollie B., & Alyssa H. for finding Mom's very own Falker Satherhood.
Joy said...

What is that orange thing supposed to be?!?

Katelymm said...

I have NO idea what that Planting the Seed cake is supposed to represent... all I know is that it terrifies me and I can't look away...

Anonymous said...

Wowza - it took a studious 6 minutes to figure out that seed one is a watering can and not an angry va-jay-jay. I'm still not 100% certain about that, by the way...

bassgirl said...

I M & M's too, expecially the brown ones!

wv: redab If you mess up the lettering on the cake, just redab it!

Anonymous said...

I thought the orange thing was a lobster claw, but a watering can makes much more sense.

cc

Andrea K. said...

Anonymous at 9:37am -- I'll have to take your word that it's supposed to be a watering can, but I just don't see it. What I DO see is an orange gaping maw with a pimply goiter, wearing some flower clips.

::shudder::

Oh yeah, a REAL Happy Mother's Day, that one...

Gary said...

Where I live, we have butterfly festivals and a dragonfly festival. We need to add Mothday to the calendar.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Anon 9:47. 6 minutes well spent. I thought it was a flesh eating potato.

Happy Day to all you Moths out there.

C. said...

That second cake... someone's been on Twitter too long!

#Mom should have been trending yesterday ;)

Muria said...

I'm glad anonymous figured out it's a watering can! I never would have figured it out without a hint!

Glad I saw the Sunday Sweets from yesterday first! These would make me want to revoke my "mother" status, just to avoid the cakes.

poisonheart said...

Huh. When I saw the second cake, my first thought was not "hash tag" but rather "pound symbol" and how the inscription would sound read aloud: "Pound Mom." (Which sounds like the baker is a little too involved in Mom's personal life...)

drumnate said...

My wife's initials are MM so I guess that cake would work for me!

mimi said...

Mothday Day.

They day for clearing out old mothballs.

And the orangish planting thingy I'm still lost on.

(To confuse a six-year-old, wish them a happy mothday day.)

SuBee said...

It's just a watering can, it's just a watering can, it's just a watering can...

Lauren said...

Anyone else read "Mothday Day" as "Mothra Day"? Mothra had a mother, too!

shaz said...

Was the Mothman responsible for the Mothday cake?

@Anonymous at 9.37am, I thought it was an angry va-jay-jay too!

elissa said...

I'm flabbergasted at that 5th one (along with everyone else). Could anyone think that looked good?

WV: ovenda. Put that wreck back in the oven, da. Mom won't like it.

Aunt LoLo said...

Ok, yeah. I'm totally with Anonymous 9:37am. I thought that cake was a Little Shop of Horrors-esque bit of anatomy. *shudder*

Anonymous said...

That 5th one?
Good grief-
I thought it was a shark - kind of like Jaws.
After yesterday's beauties - these are a crying shame.
mocking

Momcat said...

Won't say in a public forum what I thought that Seed cake was. I couldn't stand to look at it long enough to figure it out.

wv: redionat. "Redionat, it's Mothday Day and you'd better have a present!"

Maureen said...

"Thanks Mom for planting the seed"??? Dear God, what is that..... THING?!?!?!?

Sandi said...

groooooan!

Karyn said...

Maybe the number sign is ACTUALLY a twitter hashtag...
OMGBBQ TWITTER IS SPREADING TO CAKES

Julie said...

My best guess on the planting thing was that it was supposed to be a cloud raining on the little flowers, but I had no idea why a cloud would be orange and black with a gaping hole in it. That's one of the most inappropriate-looking things I've seen on a cake here, and that's saying something!

Rachel T. said...

Anonymous @ 9:37 A watering can with drops of water... of course! I thought it was a lop-sided basket ... with circles ... and ... and... dang, got nothing.

Table for Seven said...

So, I'm like thisssss close to not following you guys anymore. Why you ask? Cause I'm dang tired of wanting cake every stinking day!!!! Not that you force me to come see the wrecks and sweets here, but I'd feel left out if I didn't. I will admit that there are days where the wrecks are so bad I don't want cake that day, but i swear I've gained 20 pounds from cakes I've made or bought because of my need for cake after looking at your site. AUGH!!! Cake!!!!!

Just A Midwife said...

WHAT is the main mass of the Seed cake supposed to be??? Whatever it is, I think it needs to be removed, dissected, and then discarded!

Anonymous said...

EPCOT WATERING CAN!

DangGina said...

"Happy Mothday Day." Ick. If there really is a Mothday, I better never run across it. It's called mottephobia and it's real.

thesacredandtheprofane said...

The "watering can" cake looks like it REALLY has a severe case of vagina dentata.

The Black Dog said...

The planting the seed cake looks like a giant crab claw, with flowers attached.

Caroline B said...

That's definitely no watering can and it's coming to get me....

mel said...

watering can..ha! it's a you-know-what with teeth..Freud would be so proud.....

wv - astrishb: the little misshapen star that CakeWrecker order-takers place above something when they want to clarify instructions below for the decorators; rarely used

爱乐 said...

Maybe the Mom getting the #Mom cake is really into Twitter?

SaraMinerva said...

Is it just me or did the "watering can" remind you of vagina dentata?? Just me? ... Okay then...

SaraCVT said...

A lot of people on here are saying the second-to-last cake is actually a watering can. I'll take their word for it, although I can't really see it... When I first scrolled down to it, I literally jumped a little out of my chair, because I thought it was way more obscene than it had any right to be and depicted Mom as definitely being...female. And angry. (But why is she so orange?)

FM said...

Like Andrea, I saw the horrifying gaping maw, complete with teeth and tongue. Like the cover of Creme & Godley's album "Consequences" (for those of you who remember that from years ago . . .):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Godley_Consequences.jpg

Creepy.
Watering can?

Anonymous said...

i have never seen a watering can that looked like that! then again i have never seen anything that looks like that so maybe a watering can is a good guess....

Anonymous said...

I would be ashamed to serve any of those things to my mom D:

Anonymous said...

I smell a photoshop on #4

Looks like a cleverly erased O.

BigTerKC said...

If I were to guess, the orange thing is the fallopian tube, the little white things are sperm and the flowers are suppose to be the eggs?
Maybe?

missoularedhead said...

watering can, giant face eating monster...what's the difference?

drgns4vr said...

umm--can I rethink Mother's Day? Luckily, my child (now adult) lives out of town and we avoided the whole cake business.

WV dismodur
Dismodur is very pleased to not get any of those cakes. A phone call was plenty, thanks.

Anonymous said...

wv: minter
#1 These cake wreckers need better minters.

#2 looks like that "watering can" needs a mint, er...

lyndsey m

SaraCVT said...

I just noticed...we were all so traumatized by the watering can/vagina dentata/lobster claw/flesh eating potato/shark/your-guess-as-good-as-mine cake that none of us picked up on that it's ALSO a CCC (patootie!) Maybe THAT'S why it's so awful...

Sonia said...

I do believe I saw a horror film about that orange holey cake not so long ago on netflix ... anyone remember "Teeth" at all .... ?

WV: laugnoc = what the "seed bearers" would not have been doing had they known what was coming ...

- Sonia

Anonymous said...

wv: comenin
hahaha... thats what the "watering can" said to the seeds...

lyndsey m

sjjannen said...

Glad somebody figured out the watering can thing--I thought it might have been an up-cycled (and quite stale) Easter cake: I saw a brown basket with flowered eggs (and one spotted one) spilling out of it.

Jennifer H said...

(shudder) No cake should ever be encircled with black airbrushing. That's just wrong.

I feel so... violated.

Kimberly Chapman said...

I'm with the others who mentioned that the second could have been a Twitter hash tag, but I require it to have been on some semblance of a computer screen. Then it would have been cute. As is, wreckalicious.

Yesterday my 5 year old made a cake for Daddy's birthday of an upside-down globe (he's Aussie, so right-side-up for him). She made huge piles of "water" for the oceans and declared them tsunamis that might wipe out the whole population of the earth. Then she simulated the "ring of fire" over New Zealand, Australia, and part of Africa with orange icing. AND IT STILL BEATS THESE WRECKS. Global Death Cake of Doom was more coherent than the "plant the seed one". At least she could explain her terrifying narrative. Just sayin'. Sheesh.

EG said...

What the HELL is that "planting the seed" one supposed to be?

Anonymous said...

Reminds me of the Simpsons Christmas special where Bart ends up with "MOTH" on his arm because he was interrupted mid-tattoo.

wv: afteeria: THE place to be for apres-lunch goodies

Amanda Kay said...

Mothday Day made me laugh out loud. I'm at the office. Here come the stares...o_0

Oh well. Worth it. I love your blog!






http://meteoroflgy.blogspot.com/

Dread Pirate said...

I thought the Watering can/angry Vajayjay was a basket that had been smooshed.

Dread Pirate said...

Flesh eating potato made me snort ice cream out my nose. Thanks for that.

WV:ouctie What you say in the pain of a frozen inner nose.

Anonymous said...

I have a Mother's Day card my daughter (now 23) made in second grade that says, "Happy Mothy Day". Maybe she should have become a cake decorator instead of a costume designer. :)

Adorably Dead said...

Mothday Day - The celebration of Mothday, which in turn is the celebration of Mothman.

Auto Title Loans said...

Joy, I was going to ask the same thing. I'm not sure if it an innuendo or a garden? I do know that I am extremely excited for Mothday! What do I wear?
Ava

StefRobrts said...

Thanks for saying watering can, because I still see number 6 as a giant, gaping.....yes, watering can, I'll go with that.

Micalah said...

Haha thats so funny!

Anonymous said...

Believe it or not, I have never seen anything like what's in your blog at the bakery counter. Clearly I haven't been looking closely enough.

If not for Sunday Sweets, I'd be starting to wonder if any professionally decorated cake anywhere gave the customers what they wanted.

Dot said...

Maybe the 4th cake is for Media Molecule, also known as the creators of LittleBigPlanet. I <3 Mm, too!

Craig said...

Yes, these are *much* better than yesterday's baby references. Get 'em, Jen!

#1 I too have '1 Mom'. For whom I am thankful.

#2 I'll start Twittering when pigs fly, so the 'hash tag' theory didn't occur to me. Perhaps the wreckerator's name is Ed. As in Ed Ipus. (A kudos to @Poisonheart, who posted first.)

#3 Finally, the bakery division of Sirius Cybernetics Corporation gets recognition with "Lovly Mo'm". Share and Enjoy. Which you can, because it is a CCC (patooie!).

#4 Ok, so the wreckerator has a deal with Mars (the candy company). Ya think maybe Mom doesn't appreciate being used for product placement?

#5 If I tilt my head and squint, I can see a watering can instead of Audrey. Which latter association is all the more unfortunate in the context of thanking Mom for imparting a love of gardening. (And all cupcake recipients said, 'Feed Me!')

#6 The prophecies are true.

Dan in NZ said...

That "planting the seed" cake... It's hideous, I have no idea what it is, but I can't stop staring at it.

BADKarma! said...

Is "Mothday Day" celebrated at the Department of Redundancy Department, or the Department of Redundant Cryptozoology Department?

Christie said...

I think I have heard the grossest phrase EVER and I am not easily grossed out at all. Pimply goiter. GAH.

Brandy said...

I thought the orange thing was the Annoying Orange there for a minute....ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ann Onimous said...

I must be old, because I read the # as pound, like on the telephone. So my reading came out, "Pound Mom."

Uhhhh... no thanks... I'll be crying over here in the corner...

wv: chippiri. No, I will not be chippiri if you pound me.

Stephenie Daily said...

Concerning the "planting the seed" cake - so disturbed and soooo confused.

katie said...

The first thing I thought of when I saw "Happy Mothday Day" was "Happy Falker Satherhood." I'm glad you're with me on this. :)

Anonymous said...

@SaraCVT: One answer that solves why the "watering can" is both angry and orange... bad self tanning experience?

Anonymous said...

They're great!!! Can't wait to see the others.

Elizabeth said...

@Adorably Dead - would Mothman be the arch-rival of Spiderman or Batman? when they defeat him, do they get to eat him?

http://www.discountpartysupplies.com/blog/2010/04/07/20-party-cakes-gone-horribly-wrong/

**scroll down for an awful spiderman cake**

Anonymous said...

To: Jen, John and Everyone
From: Barbara Anne
Re: the 5th cake

Uglier things have been seen but not by reliable witnesses.

Shirley said...

Is that orange thing cruelty to cup cakes - shouldn't be allowed.

Nephrendil said...

So... the "watering can"... Wow. My first actual thought was that it was some kind of fruit (Mango?) that had either rotted enough to drop its seeds or had them forcibly ripped out. Neither image was good. The second thought was apparently everyone else's first - that we saw WAY too much of Mom displayed on a cake.

Arlene said...

Well Mothday Day is a new one on me. Now even those evil clothes eating critters have their own day lol. Wow. Why does that planting the seed cake look like Jaws took a huge bite out of it? Makes me very afraid.

Anonymous said...

That orange one looked to me like a mouth. I was thinking perhaps Mom had to "prep" Dad to get him ready to "plant", thus she gets the credit. I couldn't figure out what the appendages were, though! I'll go with the watering can, and that it's really a graduation or accomplishment cake, based on Mom's idea. Yea Mom!

Geri said...

please a mothday day t-shirt?

VNess said...

I thought the orange cake was a lateral section of a pregnant uterus, with the placenta at the bottom of the uterus, and the ovaries with eggs below that, plus a couple of unrelated flowers.

Coffeebean's Dailies said...

I literally pee'd in my pants! You are so freaking funny! Now I just read the 3rd entry down and pee'd again! Back to the bathroom!

Ellen said...

For Mothday Day, my Mothday and I celebrated with some Cousdays, Aundays and Uncdays.

My Brothday lives too far away to come, but he and my Sisday-in-law sent best wishes.

Hmmmm . . . the Day family -- weren't they the ones in Life With Father? Er, Fathday?

Thanks for the wonderful wrecks -- oh, and my first thought at the sight of the orange thing was Audrey Two.

She certainly reproduced prolifically and produced seeds, so it makes sense that someone would try to make her portrait in cupcakes.

LaVonne said...

@SaraMinerva: yes. Yes, it did.

I think the "1 Mom" cake was commissioned by an organization promoting traditional family values. For everyone else, may I suggest the following:

For Elton John's son: 0 Mom

Any future children of Ellen Degeneres and Portia de Rossi: 2 Moms

Any children of bin Laden and most residents of Colorado City, AZ: [Enter number up to 999 here. Higher numbers will require an addition frosting fee.] Moms

Anonymous said...

My son, who is in Kindergarten, looked at the "lovly Mom" cake and said "There is supposed to be an 'e' at the end of love in lovely." If a six year-old can spell it, why can't the wreckerators? Maybe my son can get a job as a store cake spell checker.

Anonymous said...

I don't know, guys, I just can't make a watering can out of that. I'm a doctor, and the first thing I saw was ovulation! The big black-and-orange thing is an ovary, the gaping wound is a ruptured follicle, and the thing with all the, um, seeds on it is the egg. And then there are flowers because those are always nice.

Do not go do your own Google Image search for "ovary releasing egg." I took the bullet, and here's a nice safe image for your reference: http://www.sciencephoto.com/images/download_lo_res.html?id=670089447

Puppygirl said...

Sad to say, I got the watering can right away (if you look at cake wrecks often enough, it's like a picture-word-association thing), but I read "#1 mom" automatically on the first cake, and then didn't get why it was a wreck.
As the cats would say, I think I need a nap.

Spacegeek Nat said...

YES! What Andrea K said! What the he!! is that abomination? I actually had a violent, negative reaction to viewing it. My head hurts where I hit the wall jumping back out of harm's way.

}:)

The Crafty Artisan said...

It is just scary what some people will try to sell, regardless of the horrible mistakes...

SaraCVT said...

@Anonymous 10:11 Nice Hitchhiker's reference!

VBN said...

Really? That cake was supposed to be a watering can? I never would have guesses in a million years. It scared the c**p out of me...

Freezing Kiss said...

My god. Hilarious. I've been laughing for an hour now. This blog is so funny. Your commentary makes it absolutely hilarious. <3 Claire//UK

Crystal @ Cake Decorating Mom said...

I mean really, how can a decorator not notice the Mothday mispelling. How out of it can someone be, lol.

Anonymous said...

I thought the "planting the seed" cake(?) was an angry wa-jay-jay too!!