Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Hungry Like a Wolf

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I don't take many requests here on CW, but when Katie P. asked for werewolf Wrecks in honor of her friend's new all-girl werewolf book, I was intrigued. Haven't I always said there's a cake for everything? And besides, coming off of Sunday's literary sweets, this seems appropriate.

SO. Werewolf cakes. Right. This should be interesting.

Here we have the elusive half wolf, half cake breed:

Now, you might think that a cake sprouting a wolf head would look odd. That's where the pine sprigs come in.


Ever heard of Hover Cat? Well, here's hover wolf:

Or possibly centipede wolf. I'm not sure.

Whichever it is, here he is mid-transformation:

[maintaining a straight face (which is more than I can say for Mr. Weepy Pee here)]

Um, I get the feeling you're not buying this. That perhaps your confidence in my werewolf wreck-spotting ability is slipping.

Well, look, you can tell this next one's a wolf by the teeny little bone in front of him:

That's clearly the femur from some poor soul torn asunder by this hell hound human hybrid!

Ignore the weird ripply ear-or-possibly-wing-like things. It's a hell hound. Trust me.


Or, if you won't take my word for it, take a Canadian magazine's:

You know you can trust Canadians, right? And they claim this is a werewolf. I like his little 80's exercise headband and how his ears sprout from the side of his jaw.


Hey, Katie P., Sarah F., Alexander B., & Renee T., do your ears hang low?

Katie, I hope I've done your friend and her book proud. And for the rest of you, if you're tired of hunky guy werewolf books, give Claire de Lune a try.
Stella said...

I really like the progression from bad to worse, Bravo!

Bilby P. Dalgyte said...

I'm scared... very scared :\ Especially at the first one.

Classic Steve said...

The first one is admirably done, but not very appetizing. The second is bizarre, the third a shameful mess. The fourth is what happens when the baker loves a certain tool too much. The fifth isn't so bad when you compare Lon Chaney, Jr.

Bernadette said...

Actually, the pine sprigs on the first wreck look like asparagus fern. Which is, um, toxic. So you can have your wolf and poison people too!

Chera said...

I would bet the last one is Teen Wolf from the great 80s movie featuring Michael J. Fox.

Katie said...

LOVE the cakes! LOVE THEM. Makes me want to go out and, uh, well, not eat them exactly, but find a wrecky werewolf of my own.

Thank you for playing! It should be a fun day!

Taylor said...

If you took the blue M&M eyes off the last one, it would look a lot better.

Example: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_xeMgq6gG4VY/S_KXzQFopXI/AAAAAAAAAN4/8T42-n4q9TU/s1600/wwc.bmp

Rachel E. said...

Can you do a thing for penguins pretty pretty please!!!!!!????!!!!!

Fran said...

I think that last one may be Chewbacca

Amanda Mac said...

The first one needs teeth. The last one reminds of Lon Chaney.

The ones in the middle? um....

Nicole said...

Kitty Norville is also a great female werewolf-- the series keeps improving as it goes on.

Trevor said...

ARe you sure the last one isn't Chewbacca?

Christine Johnson Books said...

Thank you SO MUCH! The werewolves had me in stitches. Love and appreciate the post!!!

A Girl In Her Kitchen said...

Now I've got that song stuck in my head! Sounds like an interesting book, may have to give it a try!

http://agirlinherkitchen.blogspot.com

Chris said...

Why am I reminded of that horrific moment in The Fly II (yeah, they made a sequel, boo) - the only thing I remember in that movie is the military testing the transporter thingee on a dog, and it arrived ... inside out.

XTrail DayTripper said...

The last one is a wolf? It looks more like a tanned Chewbacca.

Flea said...

That last was more ape than werewolf.

Melonie said...

I'm with Fran- last cake is a Wookiee.

And why would you put pine needles on a cake? For reals? Don't they know that some people get serious hives from that stuff? There's a reason they make fake Christmas trees, people.

kimberj said...

Oh c'mon... that last one has to be a sasquatch doesnt it!!!!

JAC said...

I think it's weird how the Canadian werewolf's eyes aren't actually in their sockets! creepy!

Silla said...

I'm stunned!

Julie said...

I was going to second the comment that the last one looks like Sasquatch, but the Teen Wolf idea makes sense too. After all, Michael J. Fox is Canadian right?

MollyMcB said...

I am a Canadian. Today, I am an embarrassed Canadian. For the record, none of their eyes are in the sockets ... well, aside from that first beheaded wolf.

bamatamb said...

Speaking of ears sprouting out from the sides of one's jaw--has anyone else noticed Ralphie's ears (from A Christmas Story)? They basically look like this werewolf's ears--go watch that movie and you'll see for yourself!

Unknown said...

the last cake is clearly a representation of the dad from Teen Wolf. That's the only cute werewolf I know of. (I tried to embed a picture here, but it didn't work and I'm too lazy to keep trying).

Esty said...

I'm not sure there is even cake under some of those messes. The thought of all that icing makes my teeth hurt.

Decadent Housewife said...

Any self-respecting Canadian will tell you that is Sasquatch.

The pink one might be Mrs. Howell's dog.

Angela said...

The first wolf looks kinda sad, maybe even a little forlorn. Poor wolf.

Angela said...

The first wolf looks kinda sad, perhaps even forlorn. Poor wolf.

Candy and Cake Sugar Designs said...

Have to say, that as a Canadian, I think the last one looks more like Chewbacca than a wolf. Maybe it's just me? :)

Kyra Matkovich said...

What WAS that pink centi-wolf thing? I don't care who ya are, I wouldn't eat that. Ewwwwww.

Anonymous said...

NO I think that last one was a Sasquatch

Bev Sykes said...

The Canadian werewolf looks more like Chewbacca.

Gary said...

The first one (the wolf or fox head) is actually quite good. The second one is cute. Also, it would make interesting neon colors inside you if you ate it.
But the rest of them, yeah, they're wrecks.

Gary said...

Rachel E. said...
"Can you do a thing for penguins pretty pretty please!!!!!!????!!!!!"

Anteaters. Please do one on anteaters! I love anteaters. If you can't find enough anteater cakes, it's OK to include aardvarks, pangolins, and echidnas. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

As a Canadian I can say the last cake is not a werewolf, but sasquatch! LOL!

Anonymous said...

Bravo Jen,
Your post and the wrecks are soo funny.
I thought #1 was a "bring me the head of Smokey the Bear" celebration.
mocking

Anonymous said...

I coughed up a hairball on that first one! yaaaouzzzzerr!

Junkfood said...

Shouldn't there be some music by Warren Zevon playing along with this posting? @Chera: Michael LAndon stared in "I Was a Teenage Werewolf" in 1957, two years before Bonanza.

Confessions of a Closet Hoarder but you can call me Judy said...

The last cake is endearing. He makes me smile.

Anonymous said...

I am embarrassed for all Canadians. (And can I send out a collective "we're sorry!")

Gary said...

Junkfood said... "Shouldn't there be some music by Warren Zevon playing along with this posting?"

"... I saw a werewolf reading a Chinese menu in Soho in the rain, and his hair was perfect. ..."

Anonymous said...

First I was scared of the last cake, because his teeth are so long and sharp and gnash-worthy. But then I noticed his pretty bright blue eyes and I just wanted to pinch his little icing-covered cheeks. Awww.

Liz in Seattle

Kay said...

Werewolf!
Werewolf?
There.
What?
There, wolf. There, castle.
Why are you talking that way?
I thought you wanted to.
No, I don't want to.
Suit yourself. I'm easy.

WV: detor... Talk of werewolves always sends my mind on a detor to Young Frankenstein.

Anonymous said...

I think the Canadian one might be a sasquach.

Anonymous said...

that last one could also pass for a monkey. that bites.

the eyes on all of them make me shudder...bright blue, weeping pee, etc....

a decapitated head on a bed of greenery. on a cake. ick.

that third one looks like a skein of yarn with bleeding eyes.

dharmamama said...

Oh, that first pic reminds me of Piggie Pie, a *hilarious* kids book about a witch matching wits with a wolf, both trying to get some piggies to eat. One of the pictures in the book is of the witch dreaming about a wolf-burger - his whole head in a burger bun, with his snout & fuzzy ears sticking out! Such a good, funny book, flip through it at the library or buy it for your nieces or nephews if you don't have kids.

Sharon said...

You know the sad thing is I have seen children's book illustrations that looked like the first cake.

sendingtheclowns said...

@Junkfood:
You're right! He DID stare!
(He also starred.)
=^~.-^=

sendingtheclowns said...

Why is everyone saying the first one "looks sad"? Wouldn't YOU be if it were YOUR head on a cake?
What's he supposed to do, whistle "Dixie"?
Wink and make wisecracks? Tell fortunes?
Say that he'd lend you money but he's a little short?
Sheeeeesh.
=^-.-^=

Claire said...

Spook-y, scar-y!

Mary Kirkland said...

wow, those are awful. Awfully darn funny.

mizdarlin said...

The last one is a lifelike representation of Chewbacca...IMHO..and I AM Canadian...

Anonymous said...

Wow, let's have a little cake with our frosting!

Anonymous said...

I think the last one looks like Epcot.

Unknown said...

Are you sure it isn't a werechewbaccawolf?

Corri Goates said...

The first cake looks all scabby- makes me want to permanently swear off cake. And I think the last one looks like Harry from Harry and the Hendersons.

thisamericantourist said...

Looking that the first one, I thought, "Oh. Well that's a little unfortunate, but not all that bad." Little did I know about the parade of Wookie Poo that followed. Thanks for the nightmares!

Clementine said...

LOL, Weepy Pee.... That made my day. :)

T said...

@Claire...

Awesome 30Rock reference.

"Werewolf Bar Mitzvah... Spook-y Scar-y. Boys becoming men. Men becoming wolves!"

Heather said...

Is it just me, or does the first one look like it might be a wedding cake? Creepy.

Savvy said...

I love how these little dog-ish creatures are a recurrent figure, but in varying forms. I've never seen any of these in the bakeries around me *phew*, hopefully we're not on that level, yet

Connie Moreno said...

I keep telling myself, do NOT read Cake Wrecks at work, do NOT! It is getting increasingly more and more difficult to conceal my outburst of laughter!!

Logan the Awesome said...

the last one looks like it was meant to be bigfoot, but then they changed their minds half way :P

Amnesty said...

While I was looking at this post, my daughter looked up and said, in a very small, scared voice, "I don't like that one." She meant the pink one in particular, but when she saw the rest, she asked me to close the page!

The Dream Police Person! said...

I am Canadian. I am an amateur baker and magazine reader. Never in my life have I seen something so unintentionally disturbing, strange, and spaghetti icing-ish in an open-to-the-public cooking magazine than the last cake. Lovely, really.

Marcie said...

You think the Canadians were going for Teen Wolf? For HIMYM fans:

"Come on Ref! There's a teen wolf on the court!"

If you're taking any more requests, you have already allowed me to freak out my sister with foot cakes, but now I'd love to freak out our mutual friend. She has a weird thing about eyes. Not all eyes, but some pictures of eyes freak her out. We play a game sometimes called "how about this one" where we pull up google image search and try to figure out what about certain eyes freak her out. Imagine that, except with eye cakes and your witty commentary to join our game. Yes? YES?

Allegra said...

I think the first one is supposed to be a fox. Fox noses are slimmer than wolf snouts.

In honor of my friend Paula I think you should do walrus cakes.

Anonymous said...

Well, the Canadian werewolf looks to me like a cross between King Kong and Teen Wolf - with an exercise headband :) . As for the hell hound human hybrid, all that chocolate icing makes my teeth hurt looking at it, and I'm a chocoholic!

WV creasess - There are a large number of creasess on the hell hound human hybrid.

woof nanny said...

That first one is so creepy. Like taxidermy, or a mafia cake. Eeww

Ashley said...

As a Canadian I can vouch for the fact that all werewolves here model their look after Teen Wolf here.

Korrie said...

my 10 yr old daughter declared the "Hell Hound" adorable. Then she asked me if the " Canadian werewolf" was Bigfoot......

Aliza said...

That first one... why is it on a plain white cake?! The wolf is so well decorated, and he looks rather sweet, but what happened, they ran out of steam??

The second one is kinda cute. Maybe he turned orange in horror of that notion.

The third one... argh! And the fourth-- icing much? As for the last, um, I guess that and the nurses cake prove that we Canadians can wreck cakes with the "best" of them! Wow, a wolf? seriously? I'll never look at Canadian Living magazine the same way again!

desdemona said...

I just actually bought that book at B&N the other day. I am looking forward to reading it, but now I am scared of cake. ;)

Andygirl said...

oh good god. when I saw that first one, I actually screamed.

Dee said...

"Bernadette said...

Actually, the pine sprigs on the first wreck look like asparagus fern. Which is, um, toxic. So you can have your wolf and poison people too!"

Erk!
I need to avoid that one then!

I'm allergic to that plant even when it's nowhere near my mouth...

alison said...

I'm tempted to say that the Canadian Living cake looks much more like a Wookie or a Sasquatch than a werewolf. ... but I guarantee it'll taste good, no matter what it looks like. Those recipes are typically fantastic, and a reason why the magazine keeps going after 35 years of publication.

serns said...

I'm actually trusting the Canucks more for the "werewolf" part than the "scary" part. It's a plausible werewolf. But, scary?

Arlene said...

Looks like someone found bigfoot! That last cake looks like him lol. Does this mean if I bit into one of those werewolf cakes I get to become a cake wreck? I would run off laughing looking at what appears to be melting creatures of some sort in the last three pictures..

canngil said...

wow...I just look at all that chocolate frosting on the last one....but it would have to be homemade butter-cream with lots of cocoa powder in it....

Anonymous said...

The Canadian one looks like a cross between Chewie, the sarlac, and a rancor. I'm trying not to picture how such a creature would come to be.

Anonymous said...

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Amanda | Glittericity said...

The last one... Um. Does he have a butterfly for a nose?

Anonymous said...

Oh dear...furry cake head thing.

smepps23 said...

looks like Chewbaca!

Anonymous said...

This blogsite makes me want to carry my camera into every bakery in town. They just keep getting better - or worse - well they just keep getting. However, I really like the last werewolf.

Anonymous said...

Oh, please! Number three is a Yorkie terrier with a bad henna rinse. So surprised you did not recognize this!

Zoulou said...

I laugh at Cake Wrecks all the time, but this is the first time a post has literally taken my breath away... LOL, took me a while to find it again when I saw that wolf head :P I think it got stuck on the "oh my god". Thank you, as always, for brightening my day! :)

Anonymous said...

LOL! That issue of Canadian Living magazine has been gathering dust on my coffee table since November 2008! There is also a recipe for making baby werewolf "Cub Cakes," which are actually pretty cute!

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised that nobody has made the connection on the 2 middle cakes... aren't those "Harry By The Sea", the kids' book about the dog who got covered in seaweed and scared everbody off the beach"?

Ghost Rider said...

Okay, I know this is old, but I didn't have time to comment when it came out... but didn't anyone else lose it at "Mr. Weepy Pee"? That did me in, and I'm still laughing several days later!

AnnaBanana said...

really Canadian Living? Are you sure that's a werewolf? Or maybe a Sasquatch? Maybe....?