You know those picture books, where you have to find all the hidden objects? I think this cake is kind of like that. So tell me, can you find:- 6 Styrofoam lollipops
- a picket fence
- a red-eyed demon child riding its trusty star steed
- a gold coin
- enough ribbon to choke half a dozen children
- a dozen roses
- a big thumb print
- what is either a bottle cap or a foil-wrapped candy
- a red jelly bean
- what I hope is an Oreo cookie, and not a rusted metal disc
- tulle, tulle, and more tulle
And in case you didn't spy it, this photo also has an added bonus! See, right here:
(buh dum bump!)Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week. (And the week after that, and the week after that...)
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WOW! Don't forget the rainbow, cross, and sugar cookie leaf/tree things...
My eyes hurt!
Are you sure that demon child isn't riding a carrot?
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Sad thing is, somebody probably ordered that and was THRILLED with the results.
This is a CHRISTENING cake? Hmm...
And don't forget the off-center writing! Yeesh! We really need a good shot of the top of the cake. Well, as good as it can be, under the circumstances, at any rate.
Wow. Just wow.
What sex was this child?
Overachieving cake can
gender-confuse, too.
omg...at a loss for words. No, wait, here are three...Less is more...or maybe More is bad...or More is horrific...
That reminds me of the cake my daughter made for my dad's birthday. It had every disney princess figurine she owned along with every color of sprinkles in the house. Quite a sight! Of course, she was 5 years old when she made the cake....so it was sweet - not pathetic.
Wow. That's just... wow. I don't think I've ever seen a more cluttered cake. I bet it took longer to un-decorate it, than to eat it.
The only thing I can't find on the messy...thing...is the thumb print.
Love it! How is it that you can take a cake so truly hideous and make it even funnier than it was when it was just ugly? :-)
I think the gentleman in the background holding the beer was the decorator, and he started drinking while working on the cake.
I so wish we could read the message on the cake.
oh wow...that is crazy, who comes up with the idea of an unedible candy forest and a rainbow...for a christening? Really I mean come on!
All that non-cake stuff is definitely making this the most non-appetizing cake I've ever seen.
Oh that's a riot! It IS just like those books. I would not eat that cake ... not even a lick of icing. ICK!
my favorite part is that beer bottle in the back ground.
it's glorious! what a cake spectacular.
And beer is always appropriate for a baby's christening...
wv droodi... I am glad I wasn't the one that droodi name on this wreck...
Wow. Just. Wow. Am I making this up, or does this cake actually say "Welcome to the Christian World"???? Please tell me I'm wrong...
Oh, and while we're listing "I spys" you could add- two pine trees, freshly mown grass, and a church with a steeple. They're pretty obvious, but still very important parts of this beautiful design! -Becca
People actually have cakes for christenings? "Welcome to the Christian world"?! Seriously?
WWJE?
Wow. That's...Precious. If that's what it looks like to be welcomed to the "Christian World," like the cake says, I'd rather not be welcomed! j/k
What about the "Welcome to the Christian World?" proudly displayed on top in such large writing the baby's name had to go on the side of the cake?
Does it come with a trowel to scrape the detritus off before you serve?
I found the others ... I think ... and I also spy - with my little eye - something that looks like a moldy carrot.
I don't get it.
And is the person behind the cake having a beer? Woot!
If that's the welcome you get to the Christain world, I'm glad I'm an atheist! Truly, truly hideous.
But Oh! What does the cake have written upon it?
It's a Christening cake, and appears to read "Welcome to ...the?....Christdom?"
After zooming in I have to say it's worse!
I love that the inscription says, "Welcome to the Christian World" (that's what I interpreted anyways).
If I got that for MY christening... I'd run the other way, lol.
wv = artai
This cake is not very artai.
lol - also love the added bonus of the beer bottle. That says a lot. :)
Hah! I recognize that BONUS packaging-- this cake is from the Philippines. Few notes, though:
1. Soda is very commonly found in glass bottles, so that is a soda, not a beer (note the straw)
2. Baptism/Christening cakes are common (actually, some families would have a "reception", which is probably where this pic was taken)
3. Neither a rusty coin nor an oreo-- simply yet another gold foil-covered chocolate coin not reflecting the flash well :)
Anyway, even without the BONUS packaging I would recognize the nationality of such hideousness anywhere! :) (best reason to learn to bake at home!)
A dozen roses? Darn it if I was never good at this game....help!? Someone point out the obvious.
A dozen roses? I've never been good at this game...someone help the "blonde" in the room. Where are those darn roses?
You left out hellfire, Christmas trees, and a teeny tiny cross to remind you this is a religious event.
Church with a steeple? Hmmm... I swear I thought that thing in the middle under the rainbow was the burning bush.
And if the cake doesn't just scream "classy", the guy in the background apparently drinking a beer through what looks like a straw certainly does.
Welcome to the Christian world! Let's get drunk and eat us some cake! Praise Jesus!
Thank you, CW commenters, for deciphering the "Welcome to the Christian World!" I never would have guessed that.
Wouldn't you love to see this decorator's take on the non-Christian world? What would he/she possibly churn out for a Bar or Bat Mitzvah? And woe to the child whose parents choose not to christen him/her.
You know, my better homes and gardens cookbook has a recipe for a 'busy day cake', but I don't think this is what they meant. :D
- Jenn
wv: labbil - I agree when Jen labbils this cake as a wreck :D
What about the Christmas trees?? I spy with my little eye TWO Christmas trees. Yikes.
What the...? Is that baby wearing a bikini?
What's with the tree-shaped air fresheners? I know babies are not always kissing sweet, but still...
And after all that, they STILL couldn't center the writing!!!!! Gotta love it.
Wow.
Awful. Tacky. Not even the cute kind of tacky.
And the whole star riding, La-la land, rainbows and sunshine theme is even worse when you consider the occasion: Welcome to the Christian World.
This is a hot mess.
VW: coduciz -- This cake is not coduciz to happiness.
My eyes! My eyes! Someone get me some holy water!
WF- Unglyf: This cake is really unglyf.
*sobs* The roses! I can't find the ROSES!!!
Oh, oh there they are, sorry 'bout that, I kinda lost my head there for a moment.
Ummm, those roses... kinda small aren't they?
Whew! Whatta wreck!
Does the inscription read "Welcome to the Christian World?" Cause, yeah, I think it does. It would only be better if it said "Welcome to Christain World." One of my favorite gruesome mithspellings.
First of all, I hereby nominate flourgirl for best food-related nickname ever.
Second, what is Bonus? My mind boggles as to what kind of product it could be and what it's doing so close to the cake.
WV: strypery - the only thing that could make this cake any more cluttered would be some more airbrushed strypery around the edges.
Thank you for making me laugh every single morning.
Maybe the bakery was having a "going out of business" thing going on....and they had to get rid of ALL of their inventory. And THIS cake was the LUCKY WINNER of all things hideous that were left in stock :/
Hahaha - Where'd you find this picture? LOL
It's from the Philippines as someone already pointed out. The BONUS - its a budget label from a shopping store in the Philippines BTW - label didn't even need to be there for me to recognize the tacky meringue icing.
And yes, these type of cakes are ordered. They don't cost that much, a cake that big would hardly cost more than 10 USD, but don't get your hopes up, the cake is dry and the icing is hardly exhilarating - LOL.
I've had my share of eating these cakes, reminds me of my childhood. Still, its hideousness is indeed hard to deny, but for a lot of people, it's Aces - well, a lot of people in the Philippines anyway.
Hahaha - styrofoam balloons - Spare me. LOL
...remember to tip your waiter - you've been a great audience!
Hahahaha, this is awesome! Thanks for the little I-Spy game, too, it made it all the more fun.
I went to a confirmation party yesterday. The cake was lovely, and the contrast makes this one so much worse!
That's one wreck!!!
I cant find the gold coing lol
mycreativeway.blogspot.com
It probably took them an hour to get to the actual cake.
YIKES!!
Don't forget the badly-spaced, wobbly writing on the side of the cake.
What I love the most is the two christmas trees... 12 days of chritening anyone??
The trees in the background have an amazing resemblance to the pine tree shaped car fresheners. Ewww.
It also looks likes something took a swipe outta the icing on the left corner!
It looks like the dollar store barfed on a perfectly good cake.
BTW...I think the horrid thing DOES say "Welcome to the Christian World" on it...that's just weird!
LMAO. That cake is so much fun. I love those I Spy games! I wouldn't dare eat it though. So many potential choking hazards. Good way to kill the baby, if thats what you're going for.
Uark2003, I'm having trouble too. I can only find 11. They're in the tulle. 8 pink, 1 purple, 1 yellow, and 1 white.
I imagine the final one must be in the front right group. The other corners have 3 each. But I only see 2 in that corner.
*mouth agape*
There are no words.
"Welcome to the Christian World"
If I'd known it was a world of pink and blue icing, rainbows, gold coins, and sprinkle-covered clouds I'd have tried harder to get in!
What does the text on the cake say -- welcome to the ?.... the congregation? the christening? the commotion?
Hmmmm...I would have to say that that cake's probably not doing the Christian world many favors. Truly, truly hideous.
can't...breathe...
thumbprint?!?
you're killing me!
Good lord. If that was MY Christening cake, I'd crawl back into the womb. It's a freaking CandyLand nightmare.
That inverted rainbow is no ordinary rainbow. It is Kouda, a special mushi that appears when it rains. Don't touch it, or you'll become dehydrated if you're not in contact with water at all times!
Does anyone else see what looks like a rotton orange peel on the left under the green lolipop?
Enjoy your trippy cake, Baty Rijah Charlize!
Hey Jen! It's high wedding season. Can we see some wedding wrecks? Mine's next week--let's hope it doesn't end up on here!
Meredith
Looks like a crazy Christmas house -- way to many ornaments in a little tiny yard.
I think the rusty Oreo is actually a fake penny. Which I'm not necessarily sure is better... at least an Oreo is edible!
"Welcome to the Christian World" want some LSD?
WV:flati. This cake is not a flati-ing portrayal of the Christian world.
Wow, that's really quite... hideous....
I won't even touch "Welcome to the Christian world". Dang.
...and a parr-tri-idge in a pear treeeeee!
>^!!^<
Wow. Wow.
Who knew that the Christian World looked like Psycho CandyLand?
The thumbprint is on the left (as viewed) corner...like someone stuck a finger in it getting it out of the box.
WV:funmeti All this cake needs now is some dat funmeti sprinkle frosting!
Manggy said...
"...Soda is very commonly found in glass bottles, so that is a soda, not a beer (note the straw)"
**********
So? BEER is commonly found in bottles, too.
AND, some afficionados claim that drinking booze through a straw gets you buzzed faster. Maybe even drunk--which could WELL have been the motive, here.
=^>.<^=
If this is a supposedly edible creation, then why in the name of FSM are the lollipops made of styrofoam?
That cake looks over flowing! :D
Gee, my godson's christening party only included a simple cake shaped like a cross, with an understated piped blue border.
Poor kid, he didn't realize what he was missing.
Did Sandra Lee make this $40 $500 cake?
Maybe the baby was Christened in Candyland!
EEEP!!!
Looks like a "flotsam float" to me.
Nice bonus, btw. ;)
That has got to be the tackiest Christening cake I've ever seen!
Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows....this is a baby boomer christening! Does Leslie Gore jump out?
Seriously. What the Heck?!?!
You absolutely made looking at that cake fun.
Love the drum roll....
"Seriously, now, inventory's coming up fast and I don't want to count all these styrofoam lollipops and picket fences! Get them out of the bakery....TODAY!"
wv gostedi~ Your lettering is getting a little wobbly, gostedi now."
Welcome to the Christian world!!!
LOL LOL It was never that much fun when I was a kid. I think I would still be in Sunday school if we'd had beer with straws, and cake with toys and stuff all over it! A child (or a stoned high school kid) would love this cake.
I love this cake. IT's making me nostaligic for the "Christian World"................
Did I mention that I work in Mental Health? Crappy cakes like this are good for business once Jr. is an adult.
I'm actually nauseated...
Today marks my husband's and my 7th anniversary. I demand he makes a cake like the first one only with more disney princess and pokemon cake toppers to celebrate this amazing feat of husbandly patience.
I'm pretty sure the top of the cake says, "Welcome to the Christian World" or something close to that. That has to be the strangest Christening cake I've ever seen! BTW, I think I saw TWO gold coins on it. Weird.
WV: gamyt = The objects on this cake run the whole gamyt of things you might find in your junk drawer.
That isn't a beer with straw. Some people are just so stubborn.
That is a COLA drink with a straw.
In the Philippines it is common to have then in glass bottles and even plastic bag with a straw and that bottle is NOT in the shape of a typical beer bottle common in the PI.
I'm another who recognizes the BONUS label from the Philippines. And that cake looks pretty typical for something made there, cheap & over-done. But considering the percapita income there, this was a treat for the family. It's also the reason I made my kids birthday cakes myself while we lived there. :)
I think the cake is a tad overdone. But if the posters are right and this is from the Phillipines, I'm not going to condemn it because it's a cultural difference. Some of our things look or sound pretty funny to other countries too.
wv: Noope. Noope, not gonna make fun of this one!
Yes, that is a soda bottle, Royal Tru Orange to be exact. Although... admit it fellow Filipinos, beer is, more often than not served during Christenings. In fact, all occasions are just an excuse to bring out the San Miguel (beer that is).
And that's not a particularly ugly cake for Filipino standards, it's actually average. haha.
it reminds me of a pop-up book.
Was there a sale on plastic stick-on cake decorations that day?
~Amy B
My 3 yo is now begging for this cake. Shame on you, mystery decorator.
Not to mention the beer toting person in the background. No better way to celebrate a child's christening then with booze.
i think that IS a "rusted metal disc". it actually looks like an old coin. is there something about coins and christenings? i dont know...
Oh my goodness! I'm Filipina and I can't help but smile--that ghastly thing brought back good memories of childhood birthdays! A birthday cake like that was one of the highlights of any kiddie birthday party. Ü
Someone above mentioned that this a typical Filipino birthday cake--yep, that's right: the chocolate coins, the styrofoam rainbow at the back, the ribbons and tulle. I'm surprised that this didn't have icing flowers on it (the one that comes on a toothpick/stick).
Filipinos are known for horror vacui (fear of space), which in visual art means filling every bit of space with detail. Just take a look at our jeepney, our main form of public transportation.
That being said, this cake is one ugly cake. I love it!
As someone also from the Philippines (as many of the people who commented), I was undeniably amused by this post.
YES, this is actually a typical birthday cake here. I remember mine had a working(!) plastic mini-ferris wheel, lollipop fence posts, a porcelain clown topper, the gold-covered choco coins and other bits of flotsam and I LOVED IT. XD
Personally, the only thing that offends me is the use of styro lollipops (wtf?!?)and trees. And the fact that the baby's name was haphazardly written on the side.
This is so, so very late but I just wanted to say that the random BONUS thing in the background is actually just a HUGE gallon of glue. (I have the exact same one in school. Ugh.)
Why they ever needed that near a cake, I won't even ask. :/
She don´t understand Less is more !
I think it makes more sense to assume that it's one of those Bonus packs of plastic cups. For the Pop Cola or whatever cost saving measure they got for soda.
"This is so, so very late but I just wanted to say that the random BONUS thing in the background is actually just a HUGE gallon of glue. (I have the exact same one in school. Ugh.)"
-- sorry, but the mystery "BONUS" product is pack of plastic disposable cups.
I am a Filipino, and I am NOT proud of these cakes. They are hideous. Almost half of it is garbage you can't eat, and the other half is dry cake smothered with tasteless frosting (which you can hardly eat either).
I have a picture of my first birthday where I have a cake that had several of those styro balloons. I had a huge smile plastered all over my face in that photo. I must have loved it.
Yes, this is one ugly cake but as in any country, there are people who make these sorts of cakes and there are true cake artisans. We also have our share of the latter in the Philippines.
What other posters said about the beer in Christenings is so true. Any occasion is really just an excuse to drink beer, get wasted, and annoy the entire neighborhood with videoke singing. Tons of fun, I tell ya. ;-)
yes, it does say "Welcome to the Christian World", which, here in the Philippines, is what most people also write on their gifts to the newly baptized baby :)
Cool story you got here. I'd like to read more about this theme. Thanks for giving this data.
Sexy Lady
Girls for companionship in London
This is overkill... LESS IS MORE sometimes! Geez....
I feel obligated to point out that the star-riding baby looks like he/she is also strangling a cat. Wow.
I don't know how I had missed this one, but now that I've seen it, all I can say is:
it's a world of laughter, a world or tears
its a world of hopes, its a world of fear
theres so much that we share
that its time we're aware
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small, small world
There is just one moon and one golden sun
And a smile means friendship to everyone.
Though the mountains divide
And the oceans are wide
It's a small small world
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small world after all
its a small, small world
--(insert evil laugh) now that I've gotten that one stuck in your head LOL!