Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Cupcake Cakes: Always Wrecktastic. Always.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

I've recently been accused of hatin' on the cupcake cakes. Alright, you got me: I guess I can't hide the truth any longer, and it's time for me to come clean. [sigh] Ok, here goes:

Hi, my name is Jen, and I hate cupcake cakes.

Why? 'Cuz they're ugly.

Don't believe me? Keep reading.

For Shara's birthday her son asked the baker to make a "happy monkey cake" ala Curious George. Now, as a reminder for those of us who haven't watched Saturday morning cartoons in a while, here's what Curious George looks like:


And here's what Shara got for her birthday cake:



So apparently what the decorator heard was "Curious George after he's been flattened by a cement truck". That, or maybe he/she was going for an homage to Teen Wolf:


After he was flattened by a cement truck.


Yes, I understand that in concept these things are great: no clean-up, equal portions, blah blah blah, but in execution I've yet to see a nice one that wouldn't give you blue poo.


Wait - I have to take that back. If you happen to want a skinned Spiderman face, then you're going to love Alyson B.'s birthday cake:

All it's missing are little pegs holding down the edges of his mask. (Yeah, let's call it a mask; that's less disturbing than "face skin".)


Or how about this appetizing little number?

According to Mei L., this is supposed to say "Ojai! It's worth the drive!". Now, I would love to ask what the heck "Ojai" is, but I'm way too distracted by the poo souffle on the bottom. Honestly, this thing is in serious competition with the moldy camo cake in my "dry-heave-inducing" category.


What's that? You're still not convinced that cupcake-cakes are always wreckalicious? Oh, I get it: you're saying these designs have been too complicated, right? That a simpler design would look better?

Something, for example, like this?


Ah, you're right. This IS better. I mean, "round" is a concept obviously beyond the decorator's grasp, but at least she stuck with plain white frosting. Nik P. was the manager on duty at the bakery where this was ordered (and subsequently rejected). He writes, "As the manager on duty, I immediately took the appropriate action: I took a picture to post on the internet."

I like your thinking, Nik.


Have I convinced you yet? No? Ok, my last argument, at least for today's post:

Monique R. sent in this "creative" gem taken by Jen S. You can see that Pokey's head was obviously tacked on as an afterthought: it's not even on the cake board. Plus, the angle of his face makes it look like someone twisted his unnaturally long neck 180 degrees; last I checked, turtles don't walk around facing the sky. From the giant American flag he's resting on, I would assume this was taken around the 4th of July or Memorial Day, both holidays known for their inclusion of... turtles. Erm. Yeah.

Come to the Cupcake-Cake-Hating-Side. We have real cakes.
«Oldest   ‹Older   1 – 200 of 253   Newer›   Newest»
Mel said...

Ojai is a town in California. It's where Jamie Sommers was from.

Anonymous said...

The Ojai, it looks like it's made out of meat. Tasty cake indeed.

lilacsigil said...

Well, I've never seen a cupcake cake in real life, and...now I don't want to! Thank you for today's dose of enlightenment.

Mad Izatie said...

wow, that's alot of icky cake designs.

Andrea Frederick said...

I am a teacher and loathe cupcake cakes. Have you ever tried to pass them out? It's like having a shelf of overhanging frosting oozing around your hand as you pick up each cupcake. Ewwww....and usually in kindergarten it's some charming color that will make your hand and mouth neon for a couple of days. Thanks for posting to readers everywhere what a wreck the cupcake cake can be! Whew...I feel better!

Unknown said...

The "Ojai" cake is making me nauseous.

No, really.

Ann Hedvig said...

Uglyyyyyy!

That's all I've got to say about these.

And I'll join the club of not liking CupCake cakes......

Jodi said...

These cakes are a great way to kick start a new diet. I actually don't crave cake after looking at them.

*Michelle said...

Creepy monkey thing!!! It could also be a really screwy beast (ala Beauty and the Beast). Maybe the spiderman one was a party in the theme of bad guys win? I wholehearted agree with the cupcakes are not a cake substitute.... but the last one is kinda cute! It would be nice if his head wasn't about to fall off... but at least it doesn't have an EWWW factor.

Judge said...

Aaaaand where your argument fails:
http://images.quickblogcast.com/5/2/4/9/0/117208-109425/VanGoghEcard.gif

Anonymous said...

I loved this cake, which was on the cover of the Jan 04 issue of Gourmet, I think. It got flack from readers that it was cliche and not gourmet, though. I think this is the way to do a cupcake cake.

Speaking of cupcakes, I was appalled to see these cupcakes on the cover of Bon Appetit, and am surprised that no one else seems to have noticed: white cupcake, pale pink circle with red raspberry center? They're boob cupcakes!

Anonymous said...

Ojai is a city in southern California, a couple hours out of LA.

I've never thought that it's worth the drive, though...

Anonymous said...

OK, you've convinced me! I was just about to suggest a cupcake cake for my 4 year old's birthday next month. I've been scared straight!!

Love your blog and read it everyday when I'm supposed to be working!

Chelsea said...

Not only are they generally ugly and deformed, they're also annoying to make many times...((I was a decorator at Albertsons for nine months...I've made my share)). Though, the baseball one CAN be done successfully...I've made many...all these other designs are awful. I don't understand why people don't just buy...cupcakes. I mean I've made a Spiderman-themed cupcake for my pastor's kid...it had red and blue frosting and a white frosting web on it...Simple, yet decidedly more appetizing than eating what's left of Spidey after a scalping...

-Chelsea C.

Michael said...

I don't think it was "worth the drive" to get that horrible Ojai "cake".

/rimshot

Anonymous said...

Conversation with my three year old...
D: Mommy, look, it's Curious George
Me: Yes, Baby.
D: (looking at cupcake cake meant to be George) Hey, that's not George. What is that?
Me: laughing out loud!

Anonymous said...

Cupcake cakes don't work for me either, but I'm not sure you can blame cupcakity for the Ojai cake. That would look horrible on any foundation. In fact, my first reaction was, "why did someone try to make a cake representing the aftermath of Hurricane Ike?" No, I'm serious: my second reaction was, "oh, someone's celebrating they're still alive" (misreading "drive") "so I should cut them a break for managing to make a cake at all under the circumstances." And I'm not making light of the disaster: my point is that a cake that evokes such a disaster is truly bad.

My sympathies and good wishes to those who have been affected by Ike, and if I could send y'all cake, I would.

Rachel said...

LOL!! Wow, I don't do this professionally, but I made a Curious George cake that wasn't nearly that scary for my 2-year old's birthday....cupcakes were only used as his ears.

Chris said...

I love your site!
By the way, Ojai is a city in California. It's rather far from most centers of civilization, but it's also quite beautiful.

Chris

Anonymous said...

Wow, those are some pretty awful wrecks, but the Spider Man one isn't TOO bad. If they would have made is less of a ball and more of an oval, I think it would be a bigger hit, but cupcakes aren't cakes for a reason, haha!

Trudi said...

No, they are not. The ones you have featured have always been hideous, but I know many professional bakers, including myself, who make very beautiful cupcake cakes. Don't believe me? I'd be glad to provide photographic proof!

Anonymous said...

Now, now... let's not malign cupcakes. Cupcakes are fabluous... individually. I've even seen some amazingly well decorated cupcakes. Just never in packs. I guess the lesson here is that we should be vigilant against cupcake gangs... the poor dears, they're fine on their own, it's when the get all bunched up that bad things happen to good cake.

Ruth said...

You know, I was on the fence about cupcake cakes, but I think you've pushed me off onto the disliking side. Thank you for enlightening me!

Anonymous said...

Oh, these are just sad.

There is never any reason for a cupcake cake.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I have to revise my previous remark. The Ojai cake would be ugly on any foundation, but the lumpiness and irregularity of the cupcake base are definitely making a contribution to this cake's resemblance to a wrecked beach area.

Also, though I know that Ojai is a place, I feel that there is probably some sort of lolcats joke to be made here, but I have to go to work now.

Anonymous said...

Ojai is a city in California, somewhat north of LA in the Ojai Valley. My husband and I went there last year. It was nice, but I don't remember anything similar to the 'poo souffle'...

Also, if you are relying on a cupcake cake to market your city, you might want to find a baker than can actually make people want to visit.

The Creeper said...

I hate cupcake cakes. Hate them. So much so that I even nixed the idea when it was presented for our annual recognition dinner.

Trust me, I was as tired of handing out pre-cut cakes as the next board member (have you discussed the pre-cut cake yet? what a disaster those are), but at least I was in my right mind when I suggested we go with a catered dessert.

Wendy said...

OK, OK I will convert! I no longer serve cupcake cakes at my kids birthday parties! :)

Anonymous said...

Please tell me someone did NOT pay $14.99 for that turtle "cake"....I mean I could make the same thing for $6 if I wanted too LOL!!!! *shakes head*....hopefully the taste out shadows the fugliness.

Anonymous said...

Ojai is a city in the Ojai Valley in Ventura County, California. I'm sure it's much prettier than the cake might otherwise suggest.

MeganDean said...

*note* Ojai is in California :).

Anonymous said...

That Curious George - wow. That wasn't even in the same species as what the client wanted. Why can't decorators just leave cupcakes alone? Think of the cupcakes!

Unknown said...

Ojai is some town in California I believe, pronounced "oh hi".
Some of us from back in the paleolithic era have vague memories of Jamie (the bionic woman) being from there...
Anyone?
crickets....

Anonymous said...

Oh, they're all so horrible!

Ojai, btw, is a city in California. But it doesn't look like a lumpy pile of cupcake poo!

Anonymous said...

That "monkey" cake is the freakiest thing I have ever seen! Seriously, what the heck?!

Anonymous said...

Ojai is a small town in California. It's really pretty. I grew up there. But that cake is NOT. Pretty that is.

Anonymous said...

Ugh! I am TOTALLY with you on the cupcake cake hating thing. I remember when I first saw one of those hideous things in my local grocery store...I just thought, "Oh no. I hope this doesn't become a trend." *Sigh...* It did. Blech.

-M

Anonymous said...

Scary...

FYI: Ojai is a town in southern California.

Anonymous said...

oh my. the poo souffle. wow. i mean if the brief was "make a cake that looks like it's crafted from poop" that cake would win gold in the poop cake olympics.

Bri said...

GAH!!!
LMBO!
I think these are, by far, the best (worst?) I have seen here! Excellent!
I can't tell if the Curious George or the Ojai! is more disturbing...

Shirky said...

that Ojai cake looks familiar! is it the same design as a different wreck from before?
the curious george cake is Too Much.

Anonymous said...

Well, the cupcake cakes are good to take to school on your kid's birthday. They don't allow cake because of all the utensils and plates needed.

At least with cupcake cakes, they can get something decorated. 6 year olds don't care if it is 'ugly' ;)

Anonymous said...

Cupcake poo!

Anonymous said...

I love the pseudo-Curious George! How hideous is that? I can't imagine what part of "Happy Monkey" the decorator was envisioning!!!

By the way, just so you know, Ojai is a little town in California, East of Ventura, which is about 2/3 of the way from L.A. to Santa Barbara. I used to work at a camp in Ojai. It's incredibly beautiful and definitely "worth the drive". However, not if I have to eat that cake!
-Anita in San Diego

Lildonbro said...

I'm a cupcake cake hater as well. They never look appetizing to me.

V. Nicharico said...

All I can even think to say is "WHAT are these decorators thinking?!"

Anonymous said...

Okay the one cake looks similar, and I use that loosely, to the one cupcake cake that said Farewel 6th Grades!!! Only this one looks like it has melted LOL!

Overmatter said...

The first one looks like Eric Stoltz in that movie "Mask."

Topaz said...

Ojai is a town in California. It's northeast of Santa Barbara and northwest of Ventura.

Pam

Etiquette Bitch said...

hi jen! okay, i too was at first skeptical of your cupcake-cake-hatin'. I love to make cupcakes, but, honestly, would never attempt a full-on cake. it looks like a pain in the a**. anyway, Ojai is some tropical place, I believe, but I thought the "Ojai" cake was a celebration of someone learning how to drive. I thought it said, "O Jen! It can drive!" or something to that effect.

The Cochran Family said...

Ojai is a city in California. It's quite cute too, so the cake just ruins it...

Kim said...

Ick! That George one is awful, well most of them are.
I've seen some cupcakes done beautifully actually and I have liked those.
These, however, are terrible.

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness..... they really are the worst! I love this blog - it is such fun! Thanks so much!

Rachel said...

C'mon, get it right: Easton is a bat, Rawlings is a baseball. Seriously, it cracks me up to hear of a kid named Easton, especially in conjunction with bat-and-ball sports. The produce manager at my old work was a HUGE softball weekend-warrior dude, and it surprised NO ONE when he named his boy Easton.

Although I guess it could be worse, I have heard of kids named Espn (pronounced "ess-pin")

Alice said...

here's one more reason not to like cupcake cakes.... http://www.bluerosecakes.com/images/cupcakeCake.jpg

ha!
Though I have to say as an amature decorator and lover of cupcakes these wrecks only inspire me to create the most pretty and non weird or poo dying cupcake cake ever...well maybe not ever but that I've ever seen...

sues2u2 said...

I have only seen one cupcake "cake" that I liked. It was a Christmas tree & decorated individually. Turned out so darling. Too bad I forgot to take a pix, eh?

Anonymous said...

The Ojai wreck almost put me off breakfast. I'm sitting here eating a bagel w/veggies & bacon, licking the green avocado mush off my fingers whilst staring at the wreck and being reminded of the catbox poo I'd scooped an hour earlier. Bleh. Don't like the overuse of icing with cupcake cakes, but I have made some decent pixel/8-bit cupcake groupings. Sorry, no pics. Admired, eaten, then back to console to help Mario kick monkey-butt

Anonymous said...

I thought the same thing as a previous post...that Ojai cake is the same design as the Farewel 6th Grades cake...just horribly done. Looks like it's been left in a hot car.

ari brown said...

if someone gives you a cupcake cake, you really need to think about what you did to make them not like you. real friends give you real cakes, or cupcakes that are appreciated for what they are. cupcake cakes are just cruel.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I had never heard of cupcake cakes til I got here...but I think they are hidious...and lazy. How hard is it to cut cake in similar sized pieces. I'm no rocket scientist and I can manage it. As for the 'Curious George' cupcake fiasco, that looks more like the thing that those guys tried to pass off as the Bigfoot they captured this summer. Icky.

kelli said...

I hereby solemnly swear that I will never attempt to make a cupcake cake. I wonder how those kiddies are holding up after seeing the Spiderman and Curious George cakes? I see nightmares in their futures.

Hyla said...

LMAO! yucko!

~Hyla
http://earthyfinds.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

thanks kansas girl, now i've got visions of lolcat cupcake cake dancing through my head. still less disturbing than the poo-ffle, though.

turbidity said...

These aren't quite cupcake cakes, but they all go together to form a game: Cupcakes of Catan! http://www.flickr.com/photos/quintanaroo/sets/72157594450089446/

I think they're quite clever.

clueuin said...

O.k.
Cupcakes at a party: O.k you've convinced me. Heck, no!

Cupcakes in general: Via Va la Cupcakes! (Umm, that a yea.)

Horrible Spiderman, Hurrendous Curious George, Not bad Baseball cupcake.(Though question: Why not done individually?)

O.k, O.k, I get it now! Ojai is a small town in California. Enough already! Shessh!

Peace,
Clueuin

Christine said...

Ojai is definitely not worth the drive. Do you know how far away it is even from L.A.'s boonies? Bleh. Also that Van Gogh cupcake cake someone posted is amazing!

(http://images.quickblogcast.com/5/2/4/9/0/117208-109425/VanGoghEcard.gif)

Anonymous said...

@ the anonymous at 10:30 - No, cupcake cakes *aren't* good things to send to your kid's school for a birthday party. Decorated cupcakes are, but the cupcake cakes add this thick layer of frosting that extends past the cupcake and leads to hideous messes (and often stained fingers).

Decorated cupcakes. No utensils, no plates, infinitely less of a frosting mess.

Hippy Goodwife said...

gah! I loathe cupcake cakes. What a stupid idea. Don't get me wrong. I love cupcakes and I love cake cakes. But they are not meant to be together. Lovely wrecks BTW.

Anonymous said...

They have silicone molds for making cupcake cakes w/cupcakes shaped to fit together to make the overall cake

the Ojai cake looks like Curious George flung on his own 'finishing touch'...blech!

Anonymous said...

You know, when I looked at the Ojai 'cake' my first thought was poo frappe, but I think souffle may be a better description of the texture.

Either way, that's one vile 'cake!'

I've said it before and I'll say it again: individual, beautifully iced cupcakes = awesome; masses of cupcakes with huge overhangs of icing = revolting.

LadyCiani said...

Did anyone notice the turtle has two heads? It has the cupcake head that's off the cardboard, then it has a vaguely arrow-shaped "neck" where it attaches to the cake. I have a pet turtle, and that arrow shape is shaped much more like their actual heads! So, maybe this is in celebration of a two-headed turtle? But then you're eating it, so maybe the turtle died?

Wild Child said...

If you want a decorated cake, go with the cake, if you want cupcakes, go with cupcakes. There is no point in ruining good cake design or good cupcakes with an overload of frosting and bad form. I just don't see the point, except not needing a utensil to cut the cake apart? It's still messy pulling those apart, like the teacher said. If you're serving cupcakes to kids, because you don't want to cut up a big cake, get the individually decorated ones. They are much cuter on their small scale.

Shandelle said...

My almost 5 year old said to me "Mom, I don't want that cake for my birthday, there is poop on it".

Yeah, even my 4 year old knows better. LOL!

Ruth said...

I am reconsidering my previous comment because of the Gourmet cupcake cake cover that someone linked to. I think that cupcake cakes are distasteful only when they try to disguise themselves as regular cakes. A pile of cupcakes artfully arranged but that still look like cupcakes look very pretty!

Jenny said...

So what are you feelings on cupcakes in general?

Hi Kooky said...

Alas, I am sad and confused. I'm a lover of cupcakes. Just cupcakes. The very term "cupcake cakes" is redundant and should be a warning that something has been altered beyond good taste. I'm a pretty practical gal, but "even portions" do not outweigh the ugly factor of these cakes. Any reasonable child would sob with fright when they saw the "Curious George" cake. I don't get it. Please let the cupcakes stand alone!

theinspector said...

Unless have things have changed, people are failing to mention that Ojai is really just an art lovers hippie town.

MetalNoir said...

That monkey cake bears far more resemblance to a Green Man of Celtic mythology:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Green_Man

That fact does not make it any more appealing.

Momma J said...

Ok - that poop cupcake just made me loose my desire for lunch.

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

poo souffle!!!!! BAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Anonymous said...

man, that Ojai cake is frightening. The "meat slab" portion looks like it came from The Gallery of Regrettable Food.

Anonymous said...

OMG!! Do you realize what we have here?? The Ojai cake is a wreck of the Farwel cake---it's a
DOUBLE WRECK PILE-UP!!

Ironygirl said...

One cupcake cake I actually liked was of Elmo, but other than that, yeah, cupcake cakes are not good. Plus, the frosting to cake ratio is way out of whack. Do we really want kids to be eating that much sugar at a birthday party?!

Elizabeth said...

I think cupcake cakes are cheesy!! I hadn't even heard of one til I went to an adult church function where they had one!! WHATEVER!! GIVE YOUR KIDS A REAL CAKE!!!!

Anonymous said...

Omigosh, girl detective, that cupcake DOES look like a breast. Yikes!

L. R. Jonté said...

I think a better decorator could have made the first wreck a lot less Geico-caveman-on-crystal-meth, and a whole lot more monkey like.

It still would have been ugly, but maybe not so emotionally scarring.

Manders said...

We had a cupcake cake for a party for Girl Guides. It was great. No clean up. I loved it!

These...not so much! It must be really hard to decorate on a whole bunch of cupcakes.

LTP said...

One could ALSO make the argument that the Curious George cupcake cake looks more like the Beast from Disney's Beauty and the beast: http://disney.go.com/vault/archives/characters/beast/beast.html

Ronnica said...

Okay, so I get that cupcake cakes aren't the best design wise. But it's the best way to get a good frosting to cake ratio! It's as if everyone gets a corner piece!

Kopperhead said...

I guess I have been living under a rock. I've been making wedding cakes for over 25 years, and never heard of a cupcake cake until this blog. I just don't get it. What does one do, just arrange the cupcakes and dump frosting on them? Does it sink into all the spaces left by trying to make a shape out of round cupcakes? Does that make for an extraordinary amount of frosting? Isn't that kind of messy when handing out the cupcakes? Inquiring minds....

Cupcakes are a stand alone dessert and shouldn't be smushed together to pretend to be a cake.

The Ojai cake made me shudder. And that's something I don't do often.

Anonymous said...

It would sure be nice if people would read at least 2 comments before posting. I swear 75% of these tell us where Ojai is.

I solemnly swear to never serve a cupcake cake. PROMISE!

Heather said...

Thank you! I needed a good laugh today! ALL of those are wrecktastic...very much so!

Anonymous said...

Now THIS is a Curious George cupcake cake.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/kirstenbubier/141369534/

I thought the one for Shana was Chewbacca when I first saw it...

Breeda said...

Yuck... too bad for the Ojai cake. I was born in Ojai (pronounced O-hi). Pretty place hidden in the mountains and I miss it. Looks nothing like that cake wreck.

Love your blog!

Anonymous said...

oh good, we're away from the vicarious cannibalistic theme and back with the multi-hued poo cakes.

It's safe to go back on the internet, folks.

Or maybe not...

Anonymous said...

Yeah, those are all absolutely heinous. I understand why people hate cupcake cakes if this is the type of quality they're being exposed to. (I can't completely join in the hate, as I've seen in person a couple good cupcake cakes that didn't rely on two inches' worth of frosting to make the designs.)

Heads up to the baker of the flattened-Curious-George cupcake monstrosity: here's how you make a monkey cupcake cake. And have a cute Jolly Roger cupcake cake, too.

Crystal Chick said...

I've made 2 cupcake cakes in my time, and they are a beast to decorate! Though I'm convinced mine are wayyyy cuter than the ones in this post, I don't dare share them for fear of humiliation. :)

Rebecca said...

Here's some decent looking cupcake cakes:
http://users.adelphia.net/~suebaum/cupcakecakes.htm

Anonymous said...

Thank you for saving us all from the grave mistake of a cupcake assemblage! I usually think to myself, "Well, the kids won't care what it looks like as long as it tastes good." Now I'm not so sure. Freakin' hilarious!

Dea said...

The Van Gogh cupcake monstrosity linked PROVES the point - Van Gogh didn't paint Starry Night on a scalloped-edge diner placemat! And the photos of the stack of cupcakes is NOT the same as the cupcake cake. When you try to make a shape out of a bunch of circles - it's not always going to be pretty! Not to mention - if you WANT cupcakes, why not just HAVE cupcakes? Why do they have to pretend to be anything else??

kimbalaya said...

I made ONE cupcake cake for my girls' birthdays - they were 1 and 3 years old that year. It wasn't hideous, but the amount of icing on each one was disgusting. Individual cupcakes are my birthday treat of choice now, at least until they're old enough to ask for a regular cake instead.

Miranda said...

OK. Cupcake cakes are ugly, but I'd still eat them (except for the Ojai cake; that frosting really does look like poo).

Am I the only one who thinks it would be kinda fun to have blue poo, by the way? I am? OK.

Unknown said...

I saw a really cute cupcake cake at the bakery back in early August while picking up a (regular) cake for my daughter's birthday. All the cupcakes were decorated individually, however, instead of having the icing spread across them like a regular cake. It was a teddy bear, so the icing was chocolate, and the eyes and nose and whatnot were made on top of individual cupcakes. It would be very easy to pull those apart for little kids without icing going everywhere, and it was actually pretty cute. My MIL and I thought about getting it, then went with a regular cake instead.

I agree that these are horrific, but that's not to say that *all* are.

Anonymous said...

I thought the monkey cupcake-cake was a Wookiee at first.

Anonymous said...

Lol I live just outside of Ojai! It is a little town in So. Cal. about 15-20 miles from the ocean, but 2.5 hr. drive from LA. Ojai is such a wonky (read: insanely Liberal and tree-hugging), crazy town... I wonder of that cake was made there; it totally looks like someone in Ojai would make it!! Seriously! Ojai is totally not worth the drive... stay as far away as possible!
--Jacqui Mitchell

Shara said...

That's my birthday cake that looks like the whacked out monkey. Scary, eh? I was happy that it wasn't intended for a kid, or it would have sacred the bajezus out of them.

We like cupcake cakes because of the icing to cake ratio - like ronnica said, it's like every piece is a corner piece. But, after this fiasco we might go back to regular cakes.

vikkitikkitavi said...

I spent a week in Ojai one day. Given the choice of a replay, or a piece of that cake, I'd have to take the cake.

Susanlee said...

Here are some cupcake cakes that actually work pretty well: http://users.adelphia.net/~suebaum/cupcakecakes.htm

I think the important thing to remember is not to purchase them at Wal-Mart.

Anonymous said...

My cousin did a pseudo cupcake cake for her wedding (it was in a national park, on the side of a mountain...beautiful, but casual). The cupcakes were individually decorated, and the baker placed them on a tiered stand with some flowers. It was very pretty, and she got the look of a tiered wedding cake without the fuss. But I've never seen anything like what you've posted on here!

The Five Nomads said...

Okay, I personally think that the monkey montrousity looks like a Chewbacca mask gone horribly wrong. Maybe the decorator had never seen Curious George and was a big Star Wars fan... Or maybe Planet of the Apes?

clueuin said...

Anonymous: Thank you!
One more person mentions where the heck Ojai is I am going to Screem!
Poo cake, blue poo, LOL! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...........
No.

Via la individual cupcakes!
(Man, I'm hungrey! Funny consider what I've seen today. Hmmmm?)

Peace,
Clueuin

Anonymous said...

The happy monkey cake was too too funny! Even more so when compared to what Curious George really looks like! Thanks for giving me the giggles today! =)

EmBee said...

My daughters turtle just died... Thanks for adding insult to injury.
Woman, you crack me up!
:-)

Anonymous said...

Ojai apparently is worth the drive. this was featured today: http://realestate.msn.com/slideshow.aspx?cp-documentid=10223662&imageindex=5

that picture looks way better

Kelly said...

"Poo souffle" just made me gag a little.

Auti and Tim said...

My 2 year old saw the picture of Curious George and said "A monkey" then I scrolled to the cake of the supposed Curious George and asked him what is that and he says "A Flower".

E.A.D. said...

Cupcakes are a good thing. I'd eat a whole box of them while watching a movie if I didn't lack a cast-iron stomach and I wasn't trying to keep my weight down for racing. Cupcake cakes, on the other hand, I'm not really crazy about. If they were done in the manner liz's post mentioned, no complaints. It's when people try to make them look like ONE big cake that disaster strikes!

Wendee said...

I am a cupcake lover (please dont shoot me!)! I must admit though that these cupcake cakes are...AWFUL!

Anonymous said...

I'm saddened that you've come across so many crappy cupcake cakes. I'm a cake decorator and generally enjoy cakes of that sort, and feel it necessary to now send you pictures of our cup-cakes, just so you can see that not all store-bought cup-cakes suck.

Anonymous said...

That poor Ojai cake looks like it was finished off in a pizza oven!

It probably started out no worse (well, "worse" being relative) than the "Farewel 6 Grade" cake, but then it looks like someone was transporting it some distance without realizing the sun was shining right in that car window. That must've been a very, very bad moment to open the box and... what a melted mess!

The cake with the pyramid of cupcakes on top was actually really cute. Now that kind of cupcake cake I could go with!

Anonymous said...

Unless you saw the pics, it would just be too hard to believe! I too don't like the cupcake cakes, it is NOT a work of art like a cake can be....


Yvonne

Chris said...

I worked at a bakery--cupcakery, actually--and we made AMAZING cupcakes. They tasted great and looked amazing. They would die if anyone tried to make anything like those monstrosities. Each cupcake was a work of art--none of this "cupcakes as a cake" nonsense.

Each box was scrutinized for perfection--line off? Not centered? Scrape it off and do it again.

Spiderman? No problem--each cupcake (12, 24, 48, etc.) would have a hand drawn spiderman that looked just like him flying along--all of them identical.

It annoys me to see such shoddy work being passed off to customers.

Anonymous said...

I disagree with tossing out a whole medium.
Some of these are a pretty clever use of the cupcake cake idea:
http://cupcakestakethecake.blogspot.com/2007/12/fun-with-cupcake-cakes.html

A.k.a. "Mommy" said...

You are so right about cupcake cakes. We thought we could get away with it, but ended up with heinous blood-red and eggplant colored upside-down balloons. We almost sent you a picture. The icing was about 3 feet thick and composed mainly of lard, which made it a great choice for a first birthday, as the baby is now completely waterproof. Never again we will be seduced by pull-apart cake!

Anonymous said...

I have never seen cupcake cakes in England. Sadly, wherever America leads, yea must the UK surely follow.
Cupcakes - yes.
Cupcake cakes - o please no.
It's coming, I can feel it. And we will be a sorrier nation for it.

Anonymous said...

Ojai is a hippy resort town (yup an oxymoron) in central California, the cup cake cake was probably made with micro biotic icing which is as appealing as it looks!

Anonymous said...

Thank you SO MUCH Jen for taking a brave stance on cupcake cakes. They are never, never never, OK.

What I missed is when it even became acceptable to jam cupcakes together, smear them with a giant plop of icing, and call it a day.

Anonymous said...

See, this is what I've always seen as cupcake cakes -

http://home-and-garden.webshots.com/photo/2692316540057033965zOtaqQ

All individual but together making up a whole pic. I don't think it's fair to say that the posted examples are the only kind of cupcake cake. That's like saying all the other wrecks represent all cakes. These are just examples of cupcakes wrecks, but not all cc cakes are wrecks.

Brandy said...

Wow, Ojai doesn't look ANYTHING like that! It IS worth the drive, unless there are rainstorms, mudslides, or wildfires! [shudder]

Maybe you're supposed to put the candles around the Spidey skin to mimic the pins holding it to the specimen board....

Wow, I like cuppy cakes as much as anyone, but... wow.

Unknown said...

That Spidey cake is really unsettling, and I think I know why. It reminds me of the videos from seventh grade health class that showed how AIDS screws up your immune system, in which HIV would always be a creepy, lumpy red ball with evil eyes (or worse, an actual guy in such a costume), corrupting all the cute little white T-cells. I HAD NIGHTMARES FOR MONTHS. I SWEAR I'M GONNA GO HAVE ANOTHER ONE TONIGHT.

wifeogeek said...

I must agree with the poster that state that not all cupcake cakes are "wreck-tastic" I'm sorry that there are some out there that ruin it for the rest of them. I have made a beautiful grooms cupcake cake with layers! All chocolate...Oh, now I wish I took pictures of the cakes/cupcake cakes I made.

Anonymous said...

For me, regardless of horrible design, the ratio of cake to icing on a cupcake cake makes a "piece" inedible unless you scrape half of it off.

By then, it's already too much work.

Nicole said...

I work at a SuperTarget bakery and I HATE making cupcake cakes. Though I have to say I've made a baseball (and soccer ball, etc...) one before and it turned out perfectly fine. Some people just shouldn't be cake decorators.

Anonymous said...

I think some people might be misunderstanding what a cup-cake cake is.

A cupcake cake is not individually decorated cupcakes artfully arranged on a platter, possibly in tiers to resemble a wedding cake.

A cupcake cake is cupcakes placed next to each other then iced and decorated as if they were a sheet cake. But, because the cupcakes are not flat like a sheet cake, the decorator has to dump an excessive load of icing on the poor little cakes to create a smooth surface.

The result is a thick, misshapen sludge of icing precariouly sitting atop a group of cupcakes.

And, as a few of the pp mentioned - they are horrible to serve in a kindergarten class - icing ends up all over everything. Parents, please do us teachers a hug favor and just say no! To cupcake cakes!!!

Let's start a revloution - Praise the return of the individually decoratated cupcakes

Anonymous said...

"The baby is now completely waterproof." Bwahahahaha!!!! I needed that. Thanks.

The scariest thing about the flickr link was the discovery that there's a flickr GROUP for cupcake cakes. Though actually most of them are not wrecks and some are very well done, they all would still have been better as normal cakes, IMHO. Except this one:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/cakesbyjen/2849763448/in/pool-cucpake_cakes
which I thought was awesomely cool, but... it's not really a cupcake cake, is it? It's a clever and beautiful arrangement of individually frosted cupcakes.

Oh, and torgo jr... I'm afraid that what came to mind for lolcats was something poo-fle related. Like:
Ojai, were u gonna eat dis? Sry, thought wuz nu litr box.

Anonymous said...

What awful cakes! LOL! I sent a VERY cute turkey cupcake and cookie cake to my son's kindergarten class...and believe me, except for the head, it had alot less icing on it than those store bought things with the icing just absolutely TOWERING over the top, as thick as the cupcake itself!!! I'm a decorator myself...but I do try to make sure my cakes (and even the occasional cupcake cake) go out of my kitchen looking quite presentable. LOL.

Boozy Tooth said...

That does it. I'm a new fan, but already I want to be you.

Alixandra Hice

Anonymous said...

I'd laugh if they didn't frighten me so...

Serena said...

You know, I didn't like cupcake 'cakes' before, but... wow. You have convinced me even more. lol.
Your site is amazing!

Anonymous said...

Ojai cake = totally wreck-tastic. Ewwwww to poo icing.

emzeegee & the hungry three said...

Did you know that "wrecktastic" is now a verb? I own a cake design company, and recently have been considering the wisdom of offering cupcake cakes (something not currently available in Australia.)

So as I was thinking about it, I found myself thinking, "Naahhh....too much opportunity to create things which will be wrecktastic!"

HA! Thanks for the daily giggle (and useful tool for showing my chefs what NOT to do!)

Anonymous said...

As a cake maker/decorator I too hate cupcake cakes! I've never made one quite as awful as your pictures but they never turn out what you'd call pretty and they are a huge pain in the butt to make and package. Serving them is also icky as they look much worse once you start passing them out and there's always way too much frosting.

I hope my stuff never shows up on your site. I get people that want me to write "Under Neat That Write" on their cakes and I tell them I'd better not see it on your blog or no more cake for them. :)

Anonymous said...

My son said about the monkey cake - "it looks like someone put eyes, and a nose and lips on some poo."
Tracy

Anonymous said...

...cupcake cakes...?

I've never even heard of one. What are they? Why do they exist? Why not make individual cupcakes or one normal cake?

I am baffled.

Anonymous said...

Ummm... Cupcakes - it's just portion control really isn't it? and since when has that been a good idea where cake is concerned?!

The Van Gogh (posted by Judge) looks ok, but would be so much more impressive on a plain old sheet cake, easier to make and more appropriate for the adults it is surely intended for?

Cupcake cakes are just ugly...

ohchicken said...

wow, that monkey cake looks much like the mask of agamemnon.

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much for the laughs! That curious george cake was one of the funniest things I have seen in awhile!

Sister Mary Martha said...

Just...don't try to make anything out of the cupcakes.

Or be prepared to offer up eating the results for the Poor Souls in Purgatory.

Anonymous said...

Love this blog and believe MOST cupcake-cakes are horrifying, and yet... I like this one:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3061/2859540530_10421053cf_b.jpg

Yeah, the skull is cheerful, but it IS a party, right?

Louise said...

I think Curious George got a little too curious for his own good ... Damn that's scary looking!

W. A. Whipple said...

I laughed almost as hard at some of the comments as I did at that godawful "happy monkey" cake, and subsequent Teen Wolf reference. Oh, man! I needed that!

Unknown said...

Shapes you cannot make using circles:

Rectangles
Larger circles
Triangles
Curious George's head


Shapes you CAN make using circles:

Clouds
Bubbles
"Bust A Move" video game


Cupcake Cake Decorators, please take note.

Rock and Fossil Depot said...

This was so funny, I couldn't stop laughing!

Unknown said...

I think the turtle cake looks more like Curious George than the "monkey" cake does...

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh, I can't stop myself... last one, really...

1. Wilton makes square silicone cupcake thingies. I hereby declare that if cupcake cakes MUST be made for some reason, they should be made with square cupcakes. Then you'd have a lot less space between cupcakes and you'd have cleaner edges. I think you'd still get wrecks, but at least they might be a little less wrecky.

2. I just can't believe I missed the most obvious lolcat joke.

OJAI
DO NOT WANT!

Anonymous said...

I wasn't thinking Teen Wolf as much as I was thinking Chewbacca.

no one said...

Granted, I love cupcakes a lot. They are like tiny cakes that can be enjoyed on the go.

I love cake. Who doesn't love cake?

Cupcake-cakes are just...Not So Good. At all.

Anonymous said...

I have always agreed- cupcake cakes are a lazy man's way to do ugly cake decorating.

Anonymous said...

I own a cake design company, and recently have been considering the wisdom of offering cupcake cakes (something not currently available in Australia.)
-------------------------------
As a fellow Australian, I beg you not to :)
Seriously, even the best decorated cupcake cake is just glitzed up tackiness.
Cupcakes = cool
Cupcake cakes = tack-o-rama

Anonymous said...

Yea I agree 100%

If I got one of these for my birthday I would be oh so pissed!!!

Talk about a downgrade from an ice cream cake!!!

Hey did you know Chuck Norris "developed" jeans??

http://andthisismyamerica.com/2008/09/17/good-ol-chuck/

Unknown said...

What about this one? http://aingelcakes.deviantart.com/art/Lion-97877742

Anonymous said...

But these aren't any worse than a lot of the regular cake wrecks you post! If these are an argument against cupcake cakes, then your whole blog is an eloquent argument against cake in general!

Anonymous said...

Are these a recent invention? I'd never heard of one until the one posted the other day. They seem totally inefficient and a waste of icing.

Ro said...

The Ojai cake ... second cupcake from the top on the right-hand side ... have you ever seen a more appetising colour?!!

JoJo said...

I love the "Curious George" cake. I can't belive a professional cake designer did that!

Anonymous said...

As much as I love cupcakes, the whole basis of it is to be individual. So I agree on the cupcake-cakes being an abomination (and it makes cupcakes ugly anyway)

Shalum said...

those were really weird ones. i wish they'd just back out instead of sending them over to the poor kids.

L said...

ROTFL! As a general rule, I dont like them either and I have seen a few that are well executed but these? Cant stop laughing. My kids were all like "euwww". Still laughing.

Unknown said...

Sure,you remember Jaimie Sommers. The Bionic Woman?

1970's? C'mon...really?

Morgan said...

O JAI
I UPDATED UR SPANISH

Anonymous said...

LOL -- well, there are some people who can make attractive cupcake cakes: http://www.brenscakes.com/tsreindeer.jpg

http://www.brenscakes.com/july.JPG

I guess it's sort of like "western" theme wedding cakes -- it's VERY easy for them to go very "wrong"

Anonymous said...

I've never liked cupcake cakes...even though I have seen some that were really nice. But...cake is cake and cupcakes are cupcakes...the two should never be combined.

BTW..when did the nuclear bomb hit Ojai? You'd think I would have seen something about that on the news..hmm.

clueuin said...

Kimberly, girl I sure your a nice gal and all, but I did warn people that if I saw anything more about the lovely town of Ojai I was going to Scream' So.....

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

[Eh, em,cough!]

So Holly, great picture of individually decorated cupcakes put together in a nice design, hon.
It looks good even with the green icing,(now there is something that SOB cake decorator should have done to that wedding cake rather than that nasty thing he/she drip on the side.)

If only.....

Sigh!

No really no more Ojai, enough!

Peace,
Clueuin

Jen said...

@ Judge: Anything cupcake cakes can do, real cakes can do better.

;)

mousekemom said...

I grew up in Ventura, just south of Ojai. Poor Ojai to be subjected to that nasty wreck. Love the other wrecks though...too funny!

Lancastermom said...

This blog is so funny! I check up on it a couple times a week. Even my 4 year old said that doesn't look like a turtle.

Sheri said...

I'm with you on the poo souffle. EESH. That is REALLY unappetizing. I have never seen a cupcake cake in real life either, but based on these pictures, I hope my luck holds out!

Anonymous said...

This was the funniest post for a while, I have tear stains - those 'cakes' are baaad.
On a serious (but perhaps pompous) note though aren't cupcake cakes just a consequence of a fast food culture? Proper cakes take time and effort and are (mostly) much better for it.

Anonymous said...

So on Pokey the turtle, am I missing something or is he missing HALF HIS BODY??????????????????

Katharine said...

I just saw a great cupcake cake at walmart this past Sunday. It was designed to look like a puppy (think maltese)..and it was...OK, I guess..the real kicker was the icing decorations on the carboard underneath. I had to stare at it for several minutes before I realized the piles of black on it were supposed to be paw prints...not piles of poo...you can imagine how enticing it was! (My camera phone sucks and I don't have a digital camera....otherwise I'd send you a picture of it...so sorry!)

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

The Curious George cake probably gave the child nightmares.

The Ojai! cake reminds me of an unfortunate incident with my cat and too much tuna.

The baseball cake should be in the hall of shame. There are SO many ways to make a single cupcake look like a really cute baseball. Most of us would jump for joy if our kid wanted a simple baseball cake. I did not think there was a way to screw that up.

d0nn3ll said...

Love you Jen...may I call you Jen? I rarely comment, but I'm a follower none-the-less. Keep on keepin'-on!

Anonymous said...

Everyone! Ojai is East of Ventura and south east of Santa Barbara. It is a very pretty place. Many tree huggers. By the way Larry Hagman who played JR on "Dallas" lives there. The cake looks like blobs of frosting. Yuck.:/

Anonymous said...

R
O
F
L
M
F
A
O

O.M.G. ..."Poo Soufle".
I was laughing pretty hard at the curious Curious George and the cement truck comment, but then I go to the poo soufle. I am cracking up all over again as I write about it! That term will pop into my head at ramdom in the grocery store and I will maniacally laugh out loud. People will wonder... I love making people wonder.
I haev been reading here for a couple weeks now. I love the drama you inject into your writing. Keep up the great work!
Suze

kat said...

Can't stop laughing at your comments....

Anonymous said...

It's like a Spengbab Curious George.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't agree more. Cupcake "cakes" are absolutely tragic. The first one I ever saw was at the supermarket, it was a football shape with white poopy details on it.

Zenne said...

Every time I see a cupcake cake, I feel compelled to make one just to show it's possible to make them nice. I think you'd just have to like...put thought into it, though.

la vie boheme said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

At least the Teletubby Poo cupcake cake was somewhat attractive...

Anonymous said...

*clapping*

Rachael M. said...

I have laughed SO HARD at that supposed to be a monkey cake. I was like, "Um, chewbacca, maybe" but you're right, when I scrolled down, it was definitely Teen Wolf!

And then I laughed even harder.

And forced the people I work with to come see it.

:-D

And Poo Souffle? Excellent vebage.

Becca said...

Sam's Club has a cute Umbrella Baby Shower Cake. The baby is a little creepy looking, however, the umbrella (the important part) is really cute, in the picture online and in person (they actually look the same! LOL). My mom has bought 2 or 3 of the Umbrella Cupcake Cakes recently!! :o)

AJ and Dexter's Mom said...

OMGsh!
I was dying laughing. I thought the cake was Chewbacka (sp?).
Now, I don't hate cupcake cakes. I think they're really handy at birthday parties because you don't need a fork.
However, I'll agree, having made two now, that they just cannot look like the thing you are trying to portray. It's impossible.
Teen Wolf. Still about to pee my pants on that one.
Thanks for the laughs.
Sonja

Anonymous said...

The 'Gorgeous George' effort - surely, SURELY the best wreck ever?
And Jen's comments - genius.
Tee hee hee.

Anonymous said...

OMG, I laughed so hard when I saw the monkey cake, I almost pee'd my pants! LOL
I love this Blog!
Anita

Anonymous said...

Those of you recommending the silicon cupcake-cake mold thingies...have you ever tried to actually bake a cake using one of those things?

I suggest you don't bother trying it.

I was given one of those silicon mold "cupcake" "cake" pans not long ago by well-meaning relatives. So I gave it a whirl -- for the family, not for the "real" birthday party.

Even though I've never seen a successfully decorated version of one of those things. And now I know why.

It's impossible to get those bizarrely shaped little cakes cleanly OUT of the mold, silicon or no silicon, so the sides of the cakes are malformed and crumbly. And there's no paper liners, of course. So when you go to frost the cakes, you are compelled to try to frost the sides. It doesn't work; they end up blotchy and weird.

Plus, each little oddly-shaped cake is usually much smaller than a regular cupcake.

End result: Frosting-to-cake ratio even more whacked out. Even messier to serve. Plus: Uuuuuugly.

I can make a pretty darn good "shape" cake out of standard round, square or rectangular cakes. Or I can make very cute individually decorated cupcakes. For my kids' birthday parties I often do BOTH, because we give big parties. It's just Not. That. Hard.

Silicon mold doohickey: Never again.

Holly

Chilly Beans said...

You are killing me, smalls! I haven't laughed that hard in a long time! This is hilarious! The monkey and spidermans face....I just can't stop laughing!!

Anonymous said...

The monkey cake, with the cartoon first and the cake second, made me laugh out loud.

Wonderful set up. Horrendous cake.

fug estate said...

You got me at "poo souffle". I haven't stopped laughing YET.

Those cupcake cakes, these in the post at least, strike me as being a lazy way out. If you're going to bake a cake, bake a real cake. These things remind me of those recipes where people would just slap frosting on a pile of Twinkies and call it a day.

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