Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Happy Towel Day!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Hey, hoopy froods, it's Towel Day! This is the day when we celebrate hitchhiking the galaxy, Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters, and, of course, potted petunias.

I wonder if they'll be friends with me?


So, grab your towel...

Hey, even the terrible ones have fringe benefits.


...and sit back and relax while I serve up something that is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike a teapot.


DON'T PANIC.

This hypnotized bunny rabbit is mostly harmless.

He may also be a teapot:

But that's pretty improbable.


Besides, it could always be worse.


Like so:

My, mister teapot, what an unfortunately colored spout you have.


Hey, here's a tip:




So, in conclusion:

42.


Oh, and:

"Want to see my spaceship?"


Thanks to Cassandra, Tracy B., Amanda Q., Leigh J., Kendra H., and Margaret C., my plastic pals who're fun to be with!


---------------------------------------------------



Anonymous said...

I hate it when I don't get it. :(

Anonymous said...

Zaphod rules!

Niki said...

What? No Vogon Poetry?

Heidi B said...

YAY for the lack of Vogon Poetry. That would have been even more painful than those cakes.

wv - devel Vogon poetry is of the devel

Anonymous said...

Good thing the wreckerators took up decorating cakes and not throwing ceramics.

And those roses! Blech...

mocking

Anonymous said...

entirely possible that some of those would cause Vogons to cower in agony.

Trista said...

Maybe if I had a babel fish in my ear those cakes would make sense. :)

Kris said...

What no fish to end the day?

You know "So long, and thanks for all the fish." :)

laughingmom said...

That teapot is just happy to see you. I'm not going to panic but there seems to be a whale outside my window...

Angie said...

I'll never look at a real teapot the same way again...

KittyKat said...

This post is more awesome than Eccentrica Gallumbits.

Every single one of those cakes were almost, but not quite, entirely unlike what they were supposed to represent.

Thankfully, they are still mostly harmless, until the Vogons discover them and decide to compose a poem in their honor.

Until next year, So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish!

Libby said...

As with any Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy-referencing post, this entry made my day. Also, thank you for alerting me to the fact that it's Towel Day! I shall celebrate by keeping my towel with the number 42 on it at all times today (not kidding, either).

Incidentally, I desperately need to know the story behind "The Terrible Towel". What the heck?

Jessica said...

wv: sanest
The sanest advice ever: Don't Panic.

john (the hubby of JEN) said...

Sorry about that first anonymous commenter of the day. If it makes you feel any better, Jen out-geekifies me half the time and I'm married to her.

However, if you haven't read The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy by Douglas Adams, you're missing out.

Wreck On!

john

ModestGirl said...

LOVE!

Jen, you are my number one hoopy frood, and I would like to go out for some pan-galactic gargle blasters with you!

ViolaNut said...

Belgium!

(Was that gratuitous enough?) I'm just going to ride away on this Perfectly Normal Beast and not wait to find out. ;-)

Anonymous said...

"penis" spouts. Is that a noun or a verb? Happy towel day.

Anonymous said...

I think one of those teapots is probably named Pedro... no? And they fly as far worse, if probably in excess of how a brick cannot.

Anonymous said...

I thought about calling myself "Ford Prefect," but I decided on "Cake Wreck" instead, seeing as it appears to be the dominant lifeform on this planet. Now, where's my towel?

Donna said...

Ok, I have to admit...I have never read Hitchhiker's Guide...BUT I have an older brother who did and so I recognized some of the references. So, I guess this goes to prove he was good for something other than picking on me! Please don't tell him.

Now, that being said...what is up with the pornographic teapots????

wv: mingly - that confused feeling you get when something excites you but you know it's so wrong

Libby said...

Challenge to comment-makers: name your favorite Adams quote in celebration of Towel day!

"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."

Follow-up on my Terrible Towel puzzlement: Google is my friend. Didn't realize the Steelers were Adams fans (j/k). That CCC is something almost, but not quite, entirely unlike a towel.

BADKarma! said...

Important safety... Uh... Tip... for would-be teapot makers: If you're not entirely certain how to portray a 3-dimensional, cylindrical object in two dimensions... Just DON'T.

PeaceLoveandSharpies said...

LMAO...the spouts...are so...unspoutlike. XD

Trevor said...

The Terrible Towel is fairly accurate, FYI. They are given out to Pittsburgh Steelers fans for rooting their team on to victory. They are a yellow hand towel with fringe and "The Terrible Towel" written on it. Of course, the writing on the actual towel is better....

Does writing enhance the hiding power of a towel? Perhaps he'd be more distracted with writing on the towel? Nah, he's so dumb, he probably can't read....

Erin B said...

Truth! Justice! Freedom! Reasonably Priced Love! And A Hard-boiled Egg!

Bless the heroes of the Massacre of Treacle-Mine Road!

Got Grace 2! said...

What? No dolphin cakes? How about the mice? Well, at least you didn't forget the towel - Dirk would be proud!

shereettu said...

That is a terrible Terrible Towel. No Steelers fan would approve.

Wee Tait Cakes said...

I think it's brilliant that the cake maker went to the effort of tassels on that awful towel lol.

Anonymous said...

The teapots!!!!!! Egads what were they THINKING with those spouts???

shaz said...

Ah yes, perfect teapots for the long, dark, teatime of the soul...

Pretzelogic in Phila PA said...

A couple of those "teapots" brought to mind what's so unpleasant about being drunk...

;^)

This was one of my favorite. posts. ever. Thank you!

Favorite Adams quotes:

#1 (by far): "Space is big."

Close 2nd: "What do you get if you multiply six by nine? (I always thought something was fundamentally wrong with the universe!)"

WV: jales - where some of the worst wreckerators might live if there were any true, cakey, cosmic justice.

kayk said...

Re: the teapots, it's fascinating to see the many different ways the wreckerators interpret the same template. I'd love to see what the designer thought they were supposed to look like!

Anonymous said...

Wow, Spouts really look decorated! I think someone was having a good day when they were decorating, or were they thinking of that night?

msyendor said...

@ Libby

"We have normality. Repeat. We have normality. Anything you still can't handle is your own problem."

"And later wiped out by an unsanitized telephone."


Terrible towels and phallic teapots. Yech.

WV: moodgyna: Slartibartfast's girlfriend

Alisa Knits! said...

I actually brought my Terrible Towel into work with me today in honor of the day... Everybody just thought that I was cheering on Hines and Kym for winning Dancing With The Stars. :<

Maureen said...

It wasn't until the third teapot that I finally got the visual. Love the Hitchhikers references!

Anonymous said...

Maureen..it took that long to get the visual? Or was it when it looked real?

wv: epses - they took the decorating to epses (excess)

John Dash said...

You said "Who're." Mommy, Jen said "WHO'RE!"

wv: amiersin. Mommy, Amie said "Who're!"

tiny p. elephant said...

Oh my, no......

FrankN.Stein said...

Actually, the petunias where quite unfriedly, the only thing they thought was "Oh no, not again". The whale was the one who wanted to make friends.

Kate Halleron said...

Favorite HHGG quote:

Today must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.

WV: lualieta - I don't know what it means, but it sure sounds like fun!

Libby said...

How is it that i DIDN'T know that today is also Geek Pride Day and the Glorious 25th of May, a.k.a. Wear The Lilac day (Discworld fan day)? All of this goes on my calendar for next year. You should see how Towel Day is trending on Twitter, though!

"And we interrogated a gazelle!"

Kimberly Chapman said...

The first 42 cookies I decorate today will be in your honour for Towel Day, my freddled gruntbuggly.

Anonymous said...

I THINK the terrible towel is a CCC but it looks like a bunch of icing smeared on the cake board. the towel also looks a little stained.

and those teapots look vulgar...

@Anon 9:46--maybe they should take up throwing cake....

JHill said...

Do you think the supermarket doors sigh with pleasure when you walk out of the store with one of these cakes?

Sharyn said...

Lovely crinkly edges...

Leah said...

God I'm depressed looking at those teapots. Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they have me looking at towels. Don't mind me and the pain in all the diodes down my left side...

^_^

Erin said...

I thought to myself,"hey, that second teapot is a lot better! It actually looks like a teapot!" The you pointed out the "spout." Hooo boy.

Anonymous said...

"The first ten million years were the worst, and the second ten million years, they were the worst too. The third ten million I didn't enjoy at all. After that I went into a bit of a decline." Marvin was always one of my favorites.

Eve Elizabeth said...

HGGTTG IS AMAZING AND WONDERFUL!

Now I was a Heart of Gold cake for my next birthday....

KiriD said...

Zaphod for President! I need a pangalactic gargle blaster after those cakes. I think they were made using the Infinate Improbability drive.

Anonymous said...

"Hello, I'm the main dish of the day. Would you be interested in parts of my body?"
(something like that) Hitchiker's Guide references= WIN

Marc said...

There is an art or, rather, a knack to cake wreckerating.
The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the instructions and miss.

Pick a nice day, and try it.

The first part is easy.
All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself into the project with all your might, and the willingness not to mind that you're going to screw it up. That is, you're going to screw it up if you fail to follow the directions. If you are really trying properly, the likelihood is that you will fail to follow the directions fairly hilariously.

One problem is that you have to screw up accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to be disasteriously funny because you won't be. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway done decorating, so that you are no longer thinking about the spelling, or the suggestive shape of brown logs, or about how much it's going to embarrass you when it's posted on this blog.

It is notoriously difficult to prise your attention away from these three things during the hours you have at your disposal. Hence most people's successful cakes, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport of wreckerating.

Tracy said...

LOL!
OK, so when my husband was a boy his family used the euphemism "spout" for , well... you know. So when he learned that song in school it seemed strange to him! I'm sure it was mostly harmless.
ps is it really towel day? I had no idea!

Brandi said...

I needed a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster today. Thanks!!!

amanda said...

MOSTLY harmless teapots. And how did I miss that Zaphod had breast implants?

w/v unspott- maybe my next cat will be named unspott

Allison said...

Oh, no, not again.

You think you've got problems? What're you supposed to do if you ARE a manically depressed robot?

Anonymous said...

You are one hoopy frood! Thanks for celebrating Towel Day! I was honestly a little disappointed to see no Towel Day doodle on Google, but this makes up for that entirely! <3

Daisy said...

I had a baaaad feeling when I saw the first "teapot", like I could see where this was going...and then to see that there wasn't just one, or two, but THREE phallic-spouted teapots, I couldn't help but let out a "NOOOOOOOOOO!" inside my noggin.

TheWantonSeedStitch said...

Erin B., thanks for remembering the Glorious 25th of May! :)

Barefeet In The Kitchen said...

Oh my gosh! What is the deal with the stinking ugly teapots? Those are kinda scary...

Jen said...

I never considered having a pink penis on my teapot, but apparently it's pretty standard.

Stephanie M said...

I did not see a hypnotized bunny in that one cake, but those teapots did indeed look happy to see everyone. Especially that last one. Do these bakers not stop to admire their finished cakes? I suppose it would be worse if they do and either don't see the problem, or they're quite pleased with it.

Auto Title Loans said...

That last teapot cake looks- well, like an innuendo. And that towel looks like it needs to throw in the rag; no wonder it's terrible!

Ava

Anonymous said...

Erin, thanks for reminding me about the 25th of May!
Altogether now:
"All the little angels".......

Anonymous said...

Stephanie...I think they admire their work!

DaMamaJama said...

I would think that, with all the messed-up cakes out there, one might slightly resemble Agrajag, all deformed and ticked off. I'm very tempted to make an Agrajag cake now... should be easy since I have no cake decorating talent whatsoever :)

DaMamaJama said...

I'm shocked that, what with all the completely hideous cakes out there, one did not resemble Agrajag. I'm very tempted to make an Agrajag cake now - should be easy, given that I have NO cake decorating talent whatsoever

Tracy O said...

Is it possible for me to be BOTH an HHGG fan and ALSO a Pittsburgh Steelers fan? I hope nothing implodes today. I have my Terrible Towel right here! (And yes, it looks nothing like the one in the picture - it actually looks like a towel....)
TracyO
WV: stabe - I hope that teapot "spout" doesn't stabe me... :)

Anonymous said...

Sorry, who is Agrajag?

Trillian said...

It's a pity you can only get this lovely cakes at the Bakery at the End of the Universe.

tangeria said...

but where are all the fjords?! i love all the little fiddly bits...

wv the world would be very bleake without the hitchhiker's guide

Valerie said...

Jenn, you are amazing. I think we might be twins, separated at birth! I am slightly disappointed there was no Vogon poetry!

jane said...

Ok, teapot maker needs to get some and stop making penis lookin' spouts :D They are pretty darn funny though "here's a tip" hahhahahahahahaha :D

Love For Obento said...

Time is an illusion. Caketime doubly so. :)

Anonymous said...

I didn't think I could love you any more....then today happened. I was so busy reading the HH references, I forgot to actually look at the cakes until I got to Zaphod. Thank you, you totally made my day!

Beckie said...

Loving all the references to Hitchhikers Guide To the Galaxy!!!

Sariah said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. I LOVE YOU. Just when I think Cake Wrecks can't get any better or funnier... you top yourselves again and again. ~happy sigh~

Another Jen said...

I have NEVER posted a response before.... but the Hitchhiker's Guide will get me every time! Especially when you paraphrase my FAVORITE line ever.... "A substance almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea"

Bekah said...

Where's the small piece of fairy cake? How am I suppose to extrapolate reality without a small piece of fairy cake?

Janus said...

There should have been three arms on the Zaphod cake.

Mina said...

So who has a teapot with a different color spout in the first place? Make the white, and they wouldn't look phallic at all.

Also, how on earth do you pick a favorite HGG quote? You could just type in nearly any line. How about:

"Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is."

Anonymous said...

Oh mah gawd that teapot! XD

I have my towel right here! I'm a hoopy frood!

Drawn to Caricature said...

Do you think the wreckerators engaged the Infinite Improbability drive?

BTW You should listen to the BBC radio broadcasts!

Happy Towel Day!

Janus said...

Favorite H2G2 line:

"We've met, haven't we, Zaphod? Or should I say PHIL?"

Julie said...

Wonder what kind of cake decoration an infinite number of monkeys would come up with.

Megan said...

boo pittsburg and their terrible towels, really what kind of support is that showing? GO BROWNS! :)

Julie said...

no towel with me, but i have a fish in my ear. does that count?

Suzanne said...

I'm thinking that blogger needs to add a like button for each comment.

Favorite Adams quote? -

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair.

Queen Julian XIII said...

If I ever meet myself, I'm going to punch myself so hard in the face I won't know what hit me!

wv: gummaken- what some of these wreckorators should do instead of cake making.

Heather said...

I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed after seeing those - ahem- "teapots."

Thanks for all the Hitchhiker's references. You definitely made my day!

Bubbles said...

There are currently 40 comments. I wonder if I can time this right, and be 42. :)
Those teapots... my my, warn a girl will ya'? I think I'll be sticking with coffee today.

charity-crafter said...

Oh dear for a minute I was completely dumbfounded by the teapot-I couldn't guite figure out why they would have....oh it's a spout...oh for a teapot. Oh, that is so much better then my little gutter mind was thinking at first.

Linda said...

I'm surprised no one has brought up the fact that the terrible towel started as an homage to the Slovak ladies who were Pittsburgh sports fans. In the 30s, 40s and 50s, the Slovak ladies would go the Pittsburgh Pirates games, and would use their babushkas to wave and cheer on their boys. This was later translated to dish towels they brought with them, and then to the official "Terrible Towel" for the Pittsburgh sports teams.

Anonymous said...

oh, hurrah for today's H2G2arama...

I am inspired to reread my Douglas Adams collection over half term

the cakes ming mind - really very bad! The wreckorators prove that Wonko the Sane had it right

vw: 'oblye me, these cakes are Terrible! I wish I knew where my towels was so I could hide my eyes!'

Anonymous said...

Anon #1, wiki "towel day" because I too, did not get it. Now I dooooo!

chaitea said...

OH! Lilac Day! How could I have forgotten. Gotta to make a soft-boiled egg then.

Vogon Poetry
easy, just string those WV things together. What? You didn't know Vogons were in charge of WV sourcing?

wv: scursess : Scursess, we have been found out

Loriwas said...

Yikes....Looks like another long night of eye bleaching again... that's just disturbing... blinded by the (b)light... thanks Jen - anything I bake HAS to be better than that. It gives me hope! lol. Lori

Micalah said...

I hate it when I don't get it either!

Anonymous said...

Just because i think its tragic no one knows this, today is "Nerd Pride Day". Now, there has to be at least 1 guy living in his basement who was aware of this, but thats just sad, so HAPPY NERD PRIDE DAY!!!!!

Julie said...

I love depressed robots.

Anonymous said...

HAPPY TOWEL DAY!
And remember: if a mouse is in your house, it probably just wants the question to the answer. :)

Christy said...

I could use a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster after seeing those.

Anonymous said...

WV: Somou the readers didn't catch all the Hitchhiker's Guide refs... but I think I did! Hurray!

Although, frankly, my favorite was "So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish".

Merry from Annie's Book Stop/Sharon, MA

Tracey said...

Love CW and love HGTTG! Favorite quote is too long, but it's when the Babel Fish disproves the existence of God, who promptly vanishes in a puff of logic. Goodbye, Jen, and thanks for all the wrecks!

Anonymous said...

I'm a little pee-pee pot short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my . . . oh dear.

Anonymous said...

I assume all of these are to be served with no tea....

Ayla R.

poppaeia said...

My mother would have loved those ( CCCs or not). Her version " I'm a little pee tot stort and shout, here's my handled and here's my (dramatic pause) .. spout. Heat me up and hear me shout, tip me over and Pour It Out" She would have put dibs on the ... spout. Perhaps she was a cake-baking Vogon.

Dona Kacalek said...

I love the towel! Where are the dolphins? Or the mice, for that matter!

Dona Kacalek said...

My 3 favorite quotes (there are so many!): 1)"Life," said Marvin dolefully, "loathe it or ignore it, you can't like it." 2)There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. … Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties. and 3)So long and thanks for all the fish.

Kati said...

Oh Jen, the things I learn about when I google the references in your comments that I don't understand. Sometimes I have to read the comments of a reader who does understand your references to find a clue to further my knowledge and to let me in on the inside jokes. All it took was a google search of "Zaphod" (found in the 2nd comment of the day, by Anonymous @9:39am) to take me to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Then from googling HGttG I found a youtube site that had the entire movie (made up in 7 segments), which I promptly watched in its entirety. Now I understand it all. Thanks for frequently contributing to my continuing education. Keep it up!

Sara said...

OMG you have successfully made me love you more! And now my favorite Hitchiker's guide quote:
"I can't die now! I have a head ache! I can't go to heaven with a headache! I'd be all cross and wouldn't enjoy it!" ~Arthur Dent

vw: babblyan I have a babblyan fish in my ear???

Gina said...

That is the answer to everything...

And, seriously, with the teapots? Gross.

Anonymous said...

hehe hitchhiker's guide RULES

so long and thanks for all the fish,
greg219

(ok, i admit that i posted just so i could say that)

banlu said...

It seems these cake wreckers have a problem with the fiddly bits. If they were designing Norway, it would look like Florida! (no offense meant)

Today is also the 34 anniversery of the opening of Star Wars.

Donna said...
wv: mingly - that confused feeling you get when something excites you but you know it's so wrong


Oh, I am so gonna add that word to my vocabulary!

banlu

wv - vigeste

Most of those cakes look hard to vigeste.

Monica said...

Happy Towel Day! I was giggling through the whole post.

Thanks for all the fish, Jen!

Andrea said...

Just had to let you know- you rock.

I need to go find my towel now.

amyandtenaya said...

the first one looks as though someone pooped on 2 starfish, those are some very happy looking teapots

Anonymous said...

So Marvin is now shuffling from bakery to bakery, subjecting us all to his woes? Great. That totally explains the world of cake wrecks!

Shawne said...

Oh no, I forgot my towel!

1) "I've been in and out of a gin and tonic." "Where did you find a gin and tonic?" "I found a lake and called it a gin and tonic." (or something to that effect- I don't have the book with me, either...)
2) "Whop"
3) Anything Marvin says, especially if it starts with, "Here I am, brain the size of a planet..."

Also, I wanted to name my daughter Fenchurch... I didn't, but I wanted to...

RIP DNA- you are missed!

wv: I might criate the part where Fenchurch learns to fly

Craig said...

Warning: There have been several attempts to launch a word verification EPCOT of late. Be on guard and always know the shortest route to the shelter. Meanwhile...

My copy says it was a bowl of petunias. Just sayin'.

"If you have enjoyed the experience of this drink, why not share it with your friends?"
"Because I want to keep them!"

Arthur Dent's exchange with that benighted machine reminds me of every session I have had with a computer (that includes computers made by that 'other' company, John).

Today's helpful tip: when looking for Hitchhiker references, do not search 'it tastes filthy!' whatever you do. You will be 'rewarded' with a catalog of things that taste filthy and almost no Hitchhiker references.

jenni said...

so long, and thanks for all the fish!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad at least one other person commented on Zaphod's missing arm though that's the least offensive thing about that cake.

it was an accident with a contraceptive and a time machine.

@ Marc- you win (doffs hat and bows low).

-Barbara Anne

P.S. when I eat a biscuit it stays eaten

Anonymous said...

Is there some new rush of teapot CCCs? Either way, they're ugly.

Happy Towel Day. May Douglas Adams hitchhike across the galaxy forever more, and may Wreckorators continue to provide Jen with excellent material to riff on with wonderful geeky references. 'Cause this post was awesome.

Also, happy Glorious 25th of May, fellow Pratchett fans. British comedy writers forever!

Isolder74 said...

All I can say about the first one is:

Oh no not again.

Thank goodness there wasn't any Vogon poetry. Get you towels and everyone stuck out your thumbs.

Adorably Dead said...

Woots for Zaphod!

Arlene said...

Well those sure are some interesting.. erm teapots. Yeah lets pretend they don't actually have man parts attached to them lol. Oh my gosh that first pick looks like the petunias got pooped on by an elephant. Sad lol.

Stasia said...

Hmm. Teapot as paralyzed bunny looks sorta like a rabbid.

Anonymous said...

wv: andronit

I was sort of hoping for a Marvin-y cake, but then again, considering how odd the teapots came out, I hate to think what they'd do with an andronit.

Crystal @ Cake Decorating Mom said...

Ok honestly didn't know what Towel Day was yesterday and my Facebook was filled with Towel Day comments. Is that really a tea pot? ;) I'm a beginner to cake decorating but the cake...wow!

scyllacat said...

@one of the Anonymouses: Agrajag was the final reincarnation of the bowl of petunias. I can't esplain more, it would take all day.

I guess it's Geek Pride day because between Towel Day, Lilac Day, and Star Wars Day, we need a big old Geek Day to carry it around in. It's definitely going on my calendar for next year as one of those days I should sit around doing nothing.

Thanks for the lovely post. (Yellow.)

WV: rheign.... nah, too easy, and not a lewd innuendo in sight.

Anonymous said...

I love you, Cake Wrecks!

Risa said...

That may be the single most enjoyable post I have ever read. Three arms way up for that one:)

Stefan said...

Oh, the teapot cakes...they're so...

I don't even know. Great round of wrecks this post. :D

Greenwick said...

Awesome! And a Zaphod reference! Yay!

I'm glad you posted about the Terrible Towel awhile back, or else I'd have no idea what that was.

Politicalguineapig said...

A Hitchhiker's Guide Post! Just when I thought this blog couldn't get any more awesome, it went there.
I wonder if any place serves Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters. Also, why no Marvin?

Ashley said...

That was wonderful. I wish you would have gone on longer! Lol. Love, love, love.

Anonymous said...

Arthur: It's at times like this, when I'm stuck in a Vogon air lock with a man from Betelgeuse, that I really wish I had listened to what my mother told me when I was young.

Ford: Well, what was that?

Arthur: I don't know; I didn't listen!