Monday, April 25, 2011

Passover These Wrecks

Monday, April 25, 2011

During the celebration of Passover, it's traditional for participants to avoid all types of leavening, like yeast. In fact, you could say this is one of the most important, key features of the entire celebration.

So maybe someone should tell these bakers.


Let's hope it ages well.


Now, before I start an Epcot here: yes, there *are* flour-less Passover cakes and pastries.

But I'm pretty sure this isn't one of them:

And if there's time, Google "Passover."

And then return that Wonders of the Pyramids gift book.


During Passover there is a special dinner called the Seder, which is used to recount the Exodus story and teach the younger generations. It is very Jewish. By which I mean, if you're *not* Jewish, or of the Jewish faith, then you're probably not celebrating the Seder. And, at least to my knowledge, there are no Buddhist Seders or New Age Seders or Ed Hardy Seders; Jews pretty much have a corner on the Seder market.

Why do I bring this up?

Well...

Yeeeah.

Hey, is this like wishing someone a "Merry Christian Lent"?

'Cuz I'm totally doing that now.

(Although, all things being equal, maybe I should write it on a chocolate bar.)



Thanks to today's Wreckporters Evelyn G., Amy K., & Alana M. for getting a rise out of these Wrecks.

Update from john: [rubbing temples] To those of you currently chilling in the Epcot Bunker™, yes, anyone can make a lovely Seder. Apparently there are [insert comment count here] non-Jews doing so.

It's still Jewish.

That is all.

Marama said...

Out of my own curiosity, is flour actually not allowed at all? I thought it was only if it had yeast in it, and most cakes don't.
But I'll be the first to admit that I could be very, very wrong and mean no offence if I am. (Judaism isn't a prominent faith in New Zealand, so I find it rather interesting.)

Katherine S said...

I am NOT criticizing you at all, I love your blog and have gotten many of my friends hooked on it as well, but I just wanted to let you know that some Christian faiths, like Anglicanism celelbrate the sedar on the Thursday before Easter as the last supper was a sedar meal. Just saying!. Adore you guys!

tjbmurph said...

oy vey

Rev. Allyson said...

Actually, there are other religions that celebrate the Passover! :) I'm an Interfaith minister, and we celebrate it (along with pretty much every other holiday I can squeeze in LOL), and my Christian church also honors Passover with a seder meal. So it isn't JUST Jewish people who celebrate. I agree, though, that it's a very Jewish thing. LOL

homeschoolmommy said...

Actually there are Christians who participate in the seder.

Gary said...

At the risk of contributing to a major Epcot, Christians sometimes do have Seders, to get in touch with the Jewish roots of the faith. Christ's Last Supper was a Seder.

That said, there's no doubt that a Seder is fundamentally Jewish (not to mention free of leavenings), and putting "Happy Jewish Seder" on a cake is just silly, especially on a cake that you can't even serve at a Seder.

Lady Anne said...

My eyes must be going - "And if there's room...what?"

elissa said...

ooh! ooh! Do I get to be the first to point out that some Christian churches do actually host a Seder meal (replicating the Last Supper)?

Now retreating to the Epcot bunker.

Lady Anne said...

My eyes must be going. "And it there's room...what?"

And, oy vey, to say the least!

Leslie@leserleeslovesandhobbies said...

There are Christians that do Seder dinners. There are a few things that are tweaked, but not much. ;)

I think it has to do with Exodus being in the Bible and all.

SuBee said...

My Passover cake also said,
"crda'b there's reond." Of course I had my name underneath, not Kaufman's.

It's Hebrew for, "Don't eat the cake, it's levened!"

Renee said...

I'm sure you've gotten this comment before, but Christians do sometimes have a Seder... we don't do it often though. (it's a lot of work)
My church had one on Maundy Thursday which is where we observe the Passover that Jesus celebrated before he was crucified. And it was Christian in that we add communion to it like Jesus did.
I really think that as a faith that does come out of the Jewish religion that more Christians should attend at least one Seder.

SuBee said...

My husband is Jewish, I am not. We often have a house full of Jews for Christmas and a house full of Christians for Passover and other Jewish holidays. Why? They're not doing anything else. The Riordan's are free for Passover and the Weinsteins are totally free for Christmas. IIt's fun, but people are often confused.
I think this last cake would be ideal for us.

Except for the fact that it's a cake.

Made with flour.

For Passover

alredd said...

Actually, there ARE Christian Seders, since Christians believe that Jesus fulfilled the idea of the original Passover (and also instituted the Lord's supper while taking a Passover meal with His disciples)-- He was the Lamb who was slain for the sins of His people and so the Lord "passes over" those who accept His sacrifice and believe He rose again. I had Christian friends who held seders in their homes, explaining the significance of the parts of the meal, but I'm sure none of them served a leavened cake!

Ehren said...

To answer Marama... cakes may not have 'yeast' as a specific ingredient, but they do contain baking soda and baking powder. As far as I know, the only 'leavening' allowed is egg. My mother makes a delicious Passover Wine Cake that takes about a dozen eggs to rise. Also as far as I know, the only flour permitted is that which makes Matzo. Even cake meal is just super finely ground matzo.

For all the Epcoters, I had a Catholic Seder described to me the other day and it's nothing like the real deal, though I suppose some churches may do it properly.

Heck, forget the cake, the icing is probably full of corn syrup anyway :o) These cakes are just amusing for lack of forethought.

Anonymous said...

At Epcot, many Christians have Passover seders to celebrate the Mosaic roots of Easter.

Amy'sMom said...

HOORAY!!!
There's no EPCOT, like a religious EPCOT.
Keep it going, people!!!

elissa said...

To make up for my Epcot contribution, I offer this link for your delight and amusement:

http://notalwaysright.com/congra-duh-lations/11237

It's not only the wreckerators!

Anonymous said...

Marama, to provide a simple answer to your question, wheat flour is not allowed at all unless it has first been baked into Matzah.

D

gena said...

Flour isn't the issue for Passover; The leavening agent is. Think about it, folks. What's matzah made from? Cardboard? (Well, it *could* be!)

wv: gredish
Oy! Don't use the gredish for Pesach! We're not shlemiels here.

Gary said...

Leslie@leserleeslovesandhobbies said...
"There are Christians that do Seder dinners. There are a few things that are tweaked, but not much. ;)
"I think it has to do with Exodus being in the Bible and all."


Everybody said this, but I think Leslie said it best.

Marama said...

Thanks, Ehren! :) As I mentioned, my prior knowledge is (obviously) limited, but it's great to learn more. I had no idea that baking soda and the like would count!

bassgirl said...

Love how the wreckerator ran out of room for the word "room"!

And yes, Kaufman's what?

Gary said...

Lady Anne said... 'My eyes must be going - "And if there's room...what?"'

I think it says "and if there's room, Kaufman's." "Kaufman's" is probably a family name, with an extraneous apostrophe, so it should say, "Happy Passover, Kaufmans," although "Kaufman's" could be the name of a business, in which case the cake should say, "Happy Passover, Kaufman's," or "Happy Passover from Kaufman's."

One thing is certain: There would be plenty of room for the name if "and if there's room" were not taking up so much space.

Nancy McGill said...

So, just out of curiosity, what foods are and are not permitted during Passover? And what constitutes a traditional seder meal?

Anonymous said...

Isn't the first picture of a cookie, and not a cake? You can easily make a big cookie without baking powder or soda. :)

SuBee said...

For those who are interested, this site is a guide to Jewish Holidays designed for Gentiles:

http://www.jewfaq.org/holidayg.htm

Anonymous said...

Ahhh the mind boggles.... O_o

mel said...

Whoa...I'm stayin' outta this one....


wv - predi: nice looking, as in "look at all those predi cakes...."

Let Them Eat Cake said...

Hey J, J, & #1,

Joining you in the bunker. Please pass the Manischewitz. What are you watching? Oh, "The Hebrew Hammer". Good choice.

Carol said...

Oh John....though I giggled when reading your bunker update, I feel so bad for you too! Have an extra few pieces of Easter candy today....you deserve it!

Gina said...

I give you extra points for being able to read those "cakes" at all. Those make my head hurt!

Karyn said...

Who wants to join me in the Epcot bunker?
I'll make cookies!
(With or without blue and white icing, your choice)

Anonymous said...

What does the blue writing on that cake say? I can pick out "there's" in the middle... It looks like a medical prescription.

chrystle said...

It never fails to amaze me on how people who read an entertaining and very sarcastic blog, always have to put in their 2 cents worth and try and make J, J and #1 look bad. While they are fantastically amazing people, I DO NOT come to CakeWrecks for a learning experience. I come here for entertainment. If I wanted to learn new things, I go elsewhere. When I want a laugh, I come here.

LolaKatz said...

...and there are countless Jews, cooking a lovely glazed ham for Easter.

Anonymous said...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....

I love the 17 posts all thinking they're the first to say essentially the same thing (Does anyone else READ the comments before MAKING a comment) I don't care who does it, a Seder is always Jewish... And I LOVE THIS BLOG - ALWAYS.

WV surim - I surim glad you have an Epcot bunker and I hope it's stocked with leftover Easter candy!

Abi said...

I'm laughing!! Thanks!

Ariana said...

To answer Nancy McGill - nothing leavened is allowed. Flour isn't forbidden, if it's relatively flat. Rabbis are present during commercial manufacturing to make sure that items with flour or other ingredients are cooked properly and for a certain amount of time, something like 13 minutes or less. In addition, Ashkenazic (European) Jews will not eat rice, barley, corn, and a few other items. Sephardic (African & Iberian) Jews will.

Mocking said...

[Brightly]
Anyone know the price of cabbage at Fanuel Hall?
Mocking

SuBee said...

A question for John:
Can you see an EPCOT coming? When you post, do you sometimes say to yourself, "Well, this should be a contentious one?"

I ask because I never, ever see an approaching EPCOT. Its always a special surprise.

Anonymous said...

Why people think a Passover Seder has anything to do with Easter and the Last Supper? It seems to me a strange thing; mystifying.

Have had many laughs reading, as Chrystle said, the same comment overandoverandover. Also, as Anonymous mentions, seder is always Jewish.

LOVE THE SITE!!! LOVE!

Anonymous said...

John, Jen & #!,

So at some point, do you just stop reading the comments? Or does it get funny after a while?

-michelej :)

Ellen said...

There is a song often sung at Seders, talking about how each good thing the Jews received would have been enough.

The last word of every verse, which is also the only word, repeated over and over, in the refrain, is "Dayenu" (pronounced, roughly, Die-yay-nu).

It means (roughly, cause I certainly don't want to *start* an Epcot!) "it would have been enough for us."

Skimming through Epcot comments, looking for something witty or thankful to JJ&J, the word "enough" sometimes pops into my head! :-)

So, I couldn't resist another song parody. If you don't know the tune, or what some of the words mean, accept my apologies, and/or Google. No offense is meant to any tradition, and no animals or knaidlach were harmed in the writing of this parody:

A Pesach Epcot is no joy,
So, whether you're a Jew or goy,
Please don’t repeat, it ain’t a treat, Dayenu!

Refrain

I know you've mentioned leavening,
We’ve heard about the leavening,
Genug about the leavening, Dayenu!

Refrain

Some thought Jen’s knowledge was too weak,
Last Monday’s start they had to leak,
But Jen knew that it lasts a week, Dayenu!

Refrain

’Bout Christian Seders we’ve been told,
That subject now is getting old,
We’ll take, we’ll eat, just don’t repeat, Dayenu!

Refrain

A pesach cake, one can be fed,
Your stomach might just think it’s lead,
Don’t beat that horse, it’s really dead, Dayenu!

Refrain

The Pesach rules aren’t fast and hard,
Ashk'nazi varies from Sephard,
As long as you’re not using lard, Dayenu!

Refrain


Did that cover everything? :-)

Oh, and JJ&J - great post!


wv - mantless

No comments have ever mantless to me than the ones "correcting" JJ&J.

LolaKatz said...

OOOOH, Anonymous @11:55 is really asking for it. I can't wait for the responses!

Cheryl said...

(holding my right hand in the air, in the making-a-pledge style) "I do solemnly swear that I shall look at Cake Wrecks solely for my entertainment. I shall not expect to see historically accurate factiods or to be politically or culturally enlightened in any way. I will remember that Cake Wrecks exists to poke fun at cake, not people or cultures" (puts hand down and reaches for the chocolate bunny ears.

elissa said...

Anon @11:55:

It's because according to some versions (but not all) of the story of Holy Week (the week leading up to Easter), the Last Supper was the Passover meal, i.e., Seder.

But yes, it's a Jewish thing.

And all these cakes are wrecks, leavened or no.

SuBee said...

Dear Ellen,
Do I have your permission to print your lyrics? I think we'll sing this tonight. It's just perfect!

Craig said...

Might I point out that... Nah, I've already been called on attempting to start an EPCOT; I'm not about to *add* to one. ;-)

No non-Kosher marshmallows? No store-bought angel food cake spackled with store-bought vanilla frosting (dyed to match your decor) that contains just a hint of whatever is on hand to make it 'homemade'? Is Sandra Lee slacking?

scyllacat said...

Oh, dear. At what point do we reach Epcot proportions? LOL. Love these wrecks.

andrea said...

OK, I'll join the fray just to get this alternative Seder thing straight. The important thing to know is that ingredients aren't allowed. Matzo is a cracker without any ingredients. For our Buddhist Seder, we hide a piece of it, which is easy because it doesn't have any ingredients and therefore doesn't exist. Finding it is like describing the sound of one hand clapping.

Miss Mindy said...

My favorite aspect of this EPCOT is that the EPCOT you anticipated is not the EPCOT that ensued. Although perhaps not the most daisy of EPCOTS - less than 50 comments as I write this- I'm with Cheryl at 12:21: Anyone and everyone who posts a comment must take that pledge! (Bunny ears optional)

Deirdre said...

I'm thinking we need an Epcot theme song. Sung by Number 1 and a video with Spaceship Earth. And maybe double rainbows (just 'cuz I like 'em).

Anyway, these cakes remind me of a newscast I saw while visiting my sister in Philly that had a segment featuring holiday decorations. They highlighted a great Hanukkah light display--and gave that family a big ol' ham. Niiiiiice.

Ellen said...

Had to post again, just because I came back to check comments, and this was the wv:

hamica

If this is what happens at Pastoverer, what's gonna happen at Hamica?

But also say: yes (and thank you for the compliment) to SuBee, and LOL to Andrea!

Herouth said...

Funny, I thought the Epcot fodder was actually the one about the Pyramids. Mostly, because nowhere in the Bible does it say that the Sons of Israel had anything to do with Pyramids. But oh well.

Ellen said...

Three more verses, just for Herouth! :-)


The pyramids were not the task,
For which ol’ Ramses deigned to ask,
And in that knowledge you did bask, Dayenu!

Refrain

Pitom and Ramses, we all know,
Were what the Hebrews caused to grow,
But did you have to go there? No! Dayenu!

Refrain

Support for Pharoah’s newest law,
You show, and now my bricks are raw,
‘Cause you have taken the last straw, Dayenu!

Refrain

Gary said...

Anonymous says:
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....
"I love the 17 posts all thinking they're the first to say essentially the same thing (Does anyone else READ the comments before MAKING a comment) ..."

Ananymous, there's a lag time(sometimes of an hour or more) between when you submit a comment and when it's visible on the blog. That's why there are so many comments that say what's already been said, and why sometimes the eighth comment says, "Hey, I'm first!"

daemon said...

You know, I was going to leave the seder thing totally alone and point out that cookies typically don't contain yeast - although they still contain leavening agents, and flour, and are cooked beyond the prescribed so many seconds that Jewish law dictates to prevent any leavening (seriously, there are rules on the number of seconds you can cook matzoh). I actually find it really funny that the unleavening thing was related to the haste with which they had to leave Egypt, but they can spend hours whipping eggs to make sponge cakes and that's ok. Anyway, just nitpicking a little. :)

Gary said...

Anonymous said...
"Why people think a Passover Seder has anything to do with Easter and the Last Supper? It seems to me a strange thing; mystifying.
"Have had many laughs reading, as Chrystle said, the same comment overandoverandover ..."

Er, if you had read ALL the comments, Anon, or read the New Testament, you would know that the Last Supper WAS a Passover Seder.

Craig said...

I move a.) that the Pledge submitted by Cheryl be printed on a banner and towed behind an airplane across the United States on every day that ends with a 'y'. b.) That it be printed on billboards and otherwise distributed so as to make every Internet user aware of the existence of said Pledge.

I further move that preferential seating in the EPCOT Bunker(TM) be granted to those who have signed the Pledge -- in icing, of course.

[The following is 100% malarkey-free.]

@Ellen, point taken. We don't say this nearly enough:

To Jen, John & #1: Thank You.

For those about to wreck, we salute you!

Tammy said...

To Anon at 11:55 -

Do I see a shout out to my favorite musical? Jesus Christ Superstar? If so +50 points for you.

Inkfish said...

Really, if you're going to write "Merry Christian Lent" on a food item, it should be red meat-based. And served/given/presented on a Friday.

dpotsy said...

I puffy heart Ellen's song! Cheers to those of you who get it that this site is for entertainment! :)

Gary said...

andrea said...
"OK, I'll join the fray just to get this alternative Seder thing straight. The important thing to know is that ingredients aren't allowed. Matzo is a cracker without any ingredients. For our Buddhist Seder, we hide a piece of it, which is easy because it doesn't have any ingredients and therefore doesn't exist. Finding it is like describing the sound of one hand clapping."

OK, Andrea, now you're just trying to start a new Epcot. Matzoh has two ingredients, flour and water. That's about as different as can be from having no ingredients.

Joanna said...

Depending on how strictly you follow kosher laws, it's not just yeast that's banned during Passover. It's anything that could potentially be leavened, like flour and corn (which doesn't make any kind of sense to me b/c corn is a New World food and wasn't known of in Biblical times and regions) Also, whether you're Ashkenazic (sp?) or Sephardic legumes or rice might also be no-no's. Though, I find that many Jews don't follow the legumes rule because both chocolate and coffee are legumes and try and get a coffee/choco-holic to go without for a full week makes for not fun times.

~Jewess (Reform)

Anonymous said...

What is the Epcot Bunker?

Anonymous said...

Love the pastries, love your courage in explaining the Wreckiness of leavened pastry for Passover,

....JUST CAN'T HANDLE THE IDEA OF THE COOKIE WITHOUT HAVING CHOCOLATE LUST! (If you think kosher-for-passover desserts are a really satisfying substitute for regular ones, you would be mistaken)

From
-Silver_Bell

Gary said...

Disclaimer: The following is not directed at Jen, John, Number One, or the vast majority of Cake Wrecks readers, but only at those stubborn commenters (more than one of you) who say you can't see what Passover has to do with the Last Supper and Christian Holy Week.

Matthew 26:17-30, Mark 14:12-26, Luke 22:7-39 and John 13:1-17:26, all say that Jesus and his Apostles had a meal in observance of Passover, or the Feast of Unleavened Bread. In other words, a Seder. It was at this meal that Jesus gave out bread, saying "this is my body," and wine, saying, "this is my blood." These acts were the foundation of Communion (also called Eucharist or Lord's Supper), as most churches practice it. For details, see the scripture passages cited.
If there were enough space and time, I could go into all the parallels between the Exodus story and the Passion/Easter story, but I'll just say that there are many, and they are not there by accident.

ninja dude 12 said...

yyyeahhhh for being a 12 (year old who although not Jewish ) nows quite a bit about Jewish culture

Susan said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

Ok, going to the bunker now. Pass the chocolate......

wv: Mixfsk - what Rudolph & that elf dentist were: They just don't fit in......

Kae said...

Look! I brought a menorah for the Epcot Bunker.

Does anyone have candles? I need...one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

What?

Gary said...

Anonymous said... "What is the Epcot Bunker?"

Go to the Cake Wrecks main page, and click on "FAQ" under the Cake Wrecks logo. Then click on "Okay, I give up. What is it with EPCOT?"

You'll get a capsule explanation and a link the the mother of all Epcot posts. It will take a while to read all the comments on that day's post (and the next day's), but it will be worth it.

Anonymous said...

Beyond all the Epcot madness, there exists the fact that no one has pointed out the best line of all "Merry Christian Lent!" So I will. Hilarious!

Love this blog, love J, J and #1, love the comments.

Lizzie

wv: taiki. These wrecks taiki the cakie.

Anonymous said...

I heart Cake Wrecks--I hope you can read this from the bunker. Did you have the foresight to grab a couple of these controversial cakes to snack on while you wait for sanity to return?

RJ said...

Yeah, you could write "Merry Christian Lent" on the meatloaf/bacon baby cake, served on Friday during Passover.

RubyV said...

Ellen's song +10

I"ve got Hashahar Haoele for the Matzah! Yummy KFP chocolate spread.

Will share in the bunker.

Anonymous said...

If you are preparing a sedar dinner in the bunker I'll bring the ham.

min said...

Is it safe yet? I just wanted to pop my head in to say that you're brilliant, as always, and to give a big virtual high-five to Andrea for making me laugh almost as hard as the original blog did.

melanie said...

Most Christians who participate in a "seder" are not really participating in what a Jewish person would consider a seder meal. While Jesus was Jewish, and the "last supper" was a seder meal, it consisted of more than just bread and wine (what we Christians celebrate as Communion or Eucharist or whatever your faith community calls it).

Seder meals have specific prayers and order of those prayers. And Jewish folks would certainly disagree with any and all "foreshadowing" of events that Christians "see" in the last supper.

You can put a cake in a case and think it's great, but it doesn't make it so.

Jack said...

So it isn't JUST Jewish people who celebrate

No, but it is our holiday and we are laughing at the mistakes here. The fact that others try to celebrate it is inconsequential- especially when you aren't doing it right. ;)

Anonymous said...

Jewess said:
Depending on how strictly you follow kosher laws, it's not just yeast that's banned during Passover. It's anything that could potentially be leavened, like flour and corn (which doesn't make any kind of sense to me b/c corn is a New World food and wasn't known of in Biblical times and regions) Also, whether you're Ashkenazic or Sephardic legumes or rice might also be no-no's.

In short, no "regular" cookies, cake, breakfast cereal, muffins, waffles, English muffins, bagels, rolls, oatmeal, pasta or BEER during Passover. Strictly kosher folk will not consume anything containing a grain that will ferment (and thus "rise"--yeast doesn't have much to do with it). Passover is a carbohydrate lover's hell.

Michelle said...

Ahahahahaaaa! I can't stop laughing. This is HILARIOUS! This TOTALLY makes up for the lack of Purim wrecks. Thank you for this! At final exam times, I always need a laugh. *continues giggling*

--Michelle

MissNay said...

My family went to a Seder not realizing there's not a lot of food. We starved ourselves all day so after the meal was over we went to a take and bake pizza place and got pummeled by a drunk driver.
Long story short, the pizza was delicious.

andrea said...

Thanks min :)

I have some beer and I found 8 of those birthday candles you can't blow out. Can I party in the bunker?

MissNay said...

Reading these comments is a lot like eating horseradish with parsley dipped in saltwater.

msyendor said...

Eat meat on a Friday
that's all right
Bacon bake baby
for the shower tonight

I can wreck with the best
on the social cues
And get high on the green
mixin' coffee and booze

Oh, I'm a NIT, I'm a NIT
the Nitpicker's back
Not quite sober
Don't need to, to hack

Oh, there's a nit, there's a nit
Just pick 'til there's blood
then smear it on the lintels
And skip over now, bud.

wv: Tomendeb -- blocking the bunker with a big stone after tossing in a supply of 'Lil Debbie cakes.

Auto Title Loans said...

I can't even make out the last two of what they say. The writing is so scrunched up! When it comes to holidays of faith, wouldn't it be easier to stick with the normal PC phrases?

Anonymous said...

Next you should have a whole post about politics, it might be less controversial! By the way, Christians participating in a Seder are like Americans celebrating Guy Fox Day... any excuse for a party, right? Even if we don't get the true meaning... Love this site and laugh daily! Thanks!

Anonymous said...

So funny to see all of the people debating whether sedars are jewish or not. Like a bunch of Talmudic scholars. I think whether or not is "Jewish" - we can all agree that it's funny

Dharmamama said...

@Andrea - Hahahahaha!! Your comment is brilliant! I clicked your linky name, but your blog is blocked!

WV: undstam I don't undstam why some folks take this so seriously

Tamara said...

OMG Hysterical! I am Jewish and totally appreciated this! Thank you, thank you!

LolaKatz said...

MissNay-I don't know who's Seder you attended, but it sure doesn't sound like any Seder I've been to.
This year, on night one, we had matzoh ball soup, roast chicken, a delish brisket, mashed potatoes, glazed carrots, kale, roasted root veggies and apple kugel. That was before dessert.
If you're ever in NYC during Passover, stop by.
We'll leave the door open for you ;)

Jessica Goldstein said...

Too funny. You guys are awesome. This is coming from an Authentic Jew, btw. :)

Shalom!

msbarrows said...

@Joanna - "It's anything that could potentially be leavened, like flour and corn (which doesn't make any kind of sense to me b/c corn is a New World food and wasn't known of in Biblical times and regions)"

The confusion possibly comes about because its actually in only fairly recent historical terms that "corn" has come to refer so exclusively to corn-on-the-cob style corn. Historically, "corn" referred to many cereal crops, including wheat, barley, and oats. As one example, the old laws regarding grain in the UK were called "the corn laws".

Loo-E Loo-I said...

I came in to read the comments anyway Wow! I know I was warned, but just to see that my wv is "bedashin'" was worth it!

I bedashin' to the EPCOT bunker with some goodies!

Geez. First Spaceship Earth...then King Cakes...now Passover...O.o

And you missed Irthday on Friday! ;-D


YOU GUYS STILL ROCK!

Anonymous said...

what does wv mean? I asked my nerd sister and she didn't know. I've been reading this blog for a while and can't figure it out...

Chantelle said...

Dear John and Jen and #1,

Since you moderate all comments, can't you just delete all the Epcot-y ones? Seriously. Give like, a 3 comment maximum allowing these HAVE-to-correct-EVERY-SINGLE-THING-know-it-alls to point out that yes, other people DO have a sedar, or that NO, those actually aren't daisies, or whatever else comes up... and then REFUSE to publish the rest??
In theory, I find random Epcots amusing but OMG, there have been SO many lately that it's starting to wear on me. I can only imagine how you guys must feel!
I honestly am not trying to be bitchy, I just would love to have a fun comment section back :(

elissa said...

I think there are now more posts calling Epcot! than there are actual Epcot posts. Does that mean this isn't really an Epcot situation?

Anon: WV means "word verfication." It's the nonsense word you have to type in to post. Sometimes they make funny fake words.

Loo-E Loo-I said...

wv = Word Verification

It's the word that you have to type in before you can comment. Sometimes they sound like another word or a combination of words to make a definition or sentence. Have fun!


Psst J&J and #1 - maybe this should go on the FAQ page too ;-)

mel said...

Late breaking news...internet traffic came to a screeching halt today as Wikipedia apparently crashed into Cake Wrecks, sprinkling the incredibly clever and humorous blog with numerous and seemingly at times conflicting comments about sedars, leavening, and the history of the world. Hopefully, crews will soon separate the two and allow Wikipedia to go on dispensing knowledge while Cake Wrecks continues to delight, amuse, entertain, and bring laughter and joy to all...well, almost all....

(I know I said I didn't want to get into this, but come on, folks....)

wv - wityr: someone who has more wit than another

Gary said...

Epcot update:
There are now fewer comments pointing out that some Christians have Seders than comments complaining about the aforesaid posts and duplicate comments calling for the duplicate comments to be deleted, so now the double-meta-Epcot alert is on ultra-red.

Elizabeth C. said...

Susan - The elf dentist is Hermie :)
Anon @4:02, wv: Word Verification.
My wv: usedonsi. Wreckerators usedonsi spellings.

eva said...

its not the yeast that isnt allowed, its anything with flour. potato flour and matza meal is allowed, although some people are stringent on that too.
that said, my passover cakes and cookies are out of this world!

Krusho said...

I'm skipping the comments and heading straight to the bunker.

See ya tomorrow!
Kim in ID

ChanaSorel said...

FYI -- the grains rabbinically forbidden on Passover are: wheat, rye, oats, spelt and barley. Matza has to be made from one of these grains but the flour is "guarded" (watched) because according to Jewish law once the flour and water are combined for more than 18 minutes, it is assumed to be leavened.

However you can make some awesome Passover cakes without flour or with a base of ground almonds, walnuts, pecans, etc.

Mina said...

Has anybody pointed out that Jesus was Jewish yet? I'm not reading through all the comments, but the first few I saw mentioned the Last Supper, and I really wanted to point out that Jesus and his disciples were definitely Jewish, as is the Seder tradition. So saying that the Seder isn't strictly Jewish because Christians participate in it to honour the Last Supper is like saying... well, it'd be like saying that red can't be its own colour because purple has red in it or something. I'm not good at clever analogies, but my point is that it's wrong and Jen was right. FOR EPCOT!!!!!

Diane1611 said...

All these comments (especially from Jewish folks) and no one realizes that Jen & John (love you guys!) are a week late - Passover was last week.

Anonymous said...

Really, no offense to the Jewish folks on here... but Cajuns have the best seders of all. They bake a real plastic baby in the matzoh and everything. It's legit. Do NOT argue with me. I am from near New Orleans, and I know.

--kate

Anonymous said...

Diane 1611- Passover lasts for 8 days and nights.

Anonymous said...

@Diane1611 It was last week and it's still this week. It's an 8-day holiday! Chag Sameach! (Happy Holiday!)

Anonymous said...

This non-Jew realizes that Passover ends tonight.
Oy.
This is a very stressful holiday.

mimiheart said...

Chag Sameach!

This post needs more Hanukkah Hams. And people missing the point.

WV: swetan... I'm just swetan it out in the bunker over here.

Anonymous said...

When I was in Catholic grade school, we had Seder meals every year. I always liked them, and got a taste for Matzo bread from them (you still couldn't pay me to eat radishes, though). At least we were a very accepting school, though I don't know of any Jewish kids who went. :)

helloLA said...

who orders a cake for passover?

Marnie said...

Did you really trademark "Epcot bunker?" 'Cause that made me laugh more than anything else!

BTW, someone once explained to me the different parts of the seder and what the symbolism means. It made me appreciate my Christian faith even more, knowing what Jesus and His disciples were sharing at the Passover supper.
And of course, now I also get the CW humor on the topic.:-)

Wolverine Girl said...

@kate - that was awesome! I think we need a Jewish Seder Mardi Gras Passover unleavened fried donut King Cake in the Epcot bunker

Tiffany said...

Oh poor Jen. You only thought you were avoiding an Epcot by stating that there were Passover-appropriate cakes out there. Alas, those dang Epcots tend to pop up and bite you in the butt when you least expect it!

Donna B. said...

Sending you guys lots of wrecky love, like an anti-Epcot Care Bear stare. You guys rock!

Lena Goodwin said...

Sorry, can't resist. Cocoa and coffee are actually seeds, not beans. Seeds are allowed during Pesach.

Aviatrix said...

That "Happy Passover Kaufmans" may be my new all-time favourite wreck. It has everything: sprinkles, artlessly applied ugly-coloured squiggles, thick icing lumps, illegible, ill-planned writing, hilariously misinterpreted instructions, and a probably inappropriate apostrophe. The fact that it's a leavened cake for an occasion mandating unleavened would be "just the icing on the cake" except that it's the icing on the icing on the cake.

Just when I was starting to worry that all the best wrecks had been done and there was nothing left to come but derivative works.

DJ Twisted Sister said...

It's the thought(lessness) that counts! Or, if you're not especially religiously proper...then you'll understand how cakes and their messages can transcend everything that's gospel.

Blessed said...

should write it on a chocolate bar. Ha ha ha!!!!! You evil woman. Have you been reading my blog? ; )

Anonymous said...

I don't know if I can post from here in the bunker but RE: "Although, all things being equal, maybe I should write it on a chocolate bar." I actually saw that in the 1980's at a chocolate & confections store but I'd forgotten it until just now. :D

@anonymous at 11:55- I know that "mystifying" song!! (and I read ALL of the posts so I know I'm not the only one)

-Barbara Anne

P.S. (sticks head out of bunker and yells) Sandra Lee!! (draws back into bunker and slams door shut)

Crazycatlady said...

for god's sake people! take a dang joke and quit being so literal! why is it that no one can just laugh and say "oh that's funny" as opposed to - i must now show of my stunning intellect and make you feel like a terrible person for making a joke. We need to start a coalition....

KarenH said...

Anonymous @ 3:16 PM (the first Anonymous, that is) said:
"By the way, Christians participating in a Seder are like Americans celebrating Guy Fox Day... any excuse for a party, right?"

I don't remember seeing any Guy Fox cake wrecks blogs... surely there are some out there... Guy Fox, anyone? ;)

Arlene said...

Oh words can't express the scariness of those cakes.. honestly what on earth were they doing? Lol they manage to wreck just about anything and do it with gusto apparently.

davidatn said...

(Way) back in college, I remember my non-Jewish friends were excited that the cafeteria was offering bagels at breakfast. They were served with a sign "for Passover." Sigh. At least they tried - didn't do any research - but they made many students happy.

Carol said...

MissNay---"not a lot of food"? I don't think that you attended a typical Jewish Seder. Every Seder that I have ever attended or hosted had a lot of food. Our usual menu---gefilte fish, eggs, popovers, chicken soup with matzah balls, fruit salad, baked chicken, green beans, popovers, matzah, charoses, and for dessert, fruit, chocolate covered matzah, kosher-for-Passover brownies and flourless chocolate cake. Not to mention wine. (Traditionally four cups...) I hope that you can attend a "real" seder someday.
(I know that many churches have seders, but whenever we have non-Jewish friends or neighbors join our family at a seder, they say something like "Wow, this isn't anything like the seder that we had at church!" Not that there's anything wrong with "church seders" but they are not what most Jews would call a traditional seder.)

jj said...

Perhaps it's just the late hour working on me, but I have been having a good time (no, really!) reading the comments tonight, though what really made me LOL was when the bunker door opens and Barbara Anne yells, "Sandra Lee!!" That just made my day complete, thanks... :D

Karen C said...

I was laughing as hard at some of these comments as I was at the cakes. Love this blog and it's readers.

I also find it funny that people are calling for Earth Day cakes when that's what started the Epcot problem to begin with.

Anonymous said...

These cakes=SO NOT Kosher!

And I've seen some beautiful kosher cakes for Passover!

Mickey said...

"I want sprinkles" on my Epcot cake please…

Mary said...

I'm glad I read all the way to the bottom - I missed the "Guy Fox" comment earlier...you've got to be kidding me. Or is it Epcot bait? Now I'm paranoid...

Craig said...

Coughcough...(Guy Fawkes)...coughcough...

Great, now SL will know where the Bunker(TM) is. That does raise an interesting question: are wreckerators allowed in the Bunker(TM)? I can't begin to imagine what she might serve -- or what she might do to the decor of the place (shudder). John (thoJ) might have to renovate it -- fortunately, he knows a thing or six about that stuff.

Anonymous said...

Fawkes
Guy Fawkes
It's freakin' Guy Fawkes.

Anonymous said...

Expecting an Epcot Part the Third (fourth?) over the "Guy Fox" comments. He doesn't have whiskers and a bushy tail, ya know.

It's Guy FAWKES.

Michelle said...

*Searching under rocks and behind trees* WHERE'S THE BUNKER!?!?! Let me in! Let me in! LOL

Sad truth.....I only read the comments when I see the "Epcot" warning posted. Then I laugh until I cry. Again. AFTER I've laughed to tears over the wrecks.

Thanks, J, J and #1! You guys (and gals) ROCK!!

Valerie said...

Unleavened does not mean without flour, it means without leavening -- something to make it rise -- which would have been yeast in the old days. Cakes aren't made with yeast, they are usually made with baking powder or baking soda, though they can be made without either if put them together correctly the eggs act as the leavening.

The idea is, flat breads only.

The Squash Lady said...

@davidatn: Hahahaha, oh that is so sad. That is the kind of gaffe my university would probably make, too! One time I went to a religious round table, and they served--I kid you not!--crab rangoon and bacon-wrapped mini hotdogs. It was hilarious, but also kind of insulting. After all it was a *religious* round table! And reps from the Muslim Student Union attended, too!!

@Barbara Ann...you crack me up! =D

And finally, just to fuel the Epcot...Guy Fawkes! *laughs maniacally*

SANDRA LEEEE!!!! *jumps into bunker and slams door*

wv: kidisate: adj, satisfied by one's own childish behavior

everlastingscribe said...

*moan* Sorry Jen. I got what you meant immediately. This is an equal opportunity wreckaration blog (which I so love) and I had to laugh when I saw some of the things foisted off on my Hebrew friends for Sedar. It made some of the "lamb" cakes not as bad. No holiday or holy day is safe from bad taste or black/red icing it seems!

And yes, other faiths can celebrate a Sedar if they wish. But, the holiday/holy day belongs to the Hebrew people. The rest of us are guests.

As to the question of yeast Marama, in an orthodox house hold the food can't even come from a place where yeast is in the building. So if the cakes were made in a place that makes bread, nope, they can't be eaten or even enter the house.

Lauren said...

Ow ow ow ow ow. I can't tell what's worse, the wreckerating, or the absolute horror that passes for Jewish education these days.

What is prohibited are foods and food byproducts whose production places any of the "five grains" (wheat, oats, barley, rye and spelt) together with water for long enough for fermentation to begin (considered to be 18 minutes).

Regular flour is not allowed because it is often processed with steam. Baked good must either be baked in under 18 minutes, as with matzah, or using a "flour" that's made from finely ground matzah. Yeast, being a fungus, can be totally kosher for Passover.

Certain Jewish communities have a tradition of not eating other grains, pulses or legumes. These traditions vary by location and exist either to prevent confusion as to what items are prohibited or because the harvested items are often cross-contaminated with the five grains. The most stringent traditions are followed by Ashkenazi Jews.

Lauren said...

So uh... did you guys know some christians do seder dinners? I mean... duh guys... *hope my sarcasm is obvious* lol I can't even read all the comments. So silly!

Sam said...

Remember how all the "Epcot" people were actually wrong?

Well that's also what's going on here!

The Last Supper was probably not a Seder. It was described only as a "Passover meal." Seders are not just any "Passover meals." They are Passover meals eaten according to very specific rules, i.e., with a seder plate, with specific times at which to drink wine, lean, read parts of the story of Exodus, etc. These rules are set forth in the Haggadah; the earliest known copy of the Haggadah dates back to the 10th Century:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haggadah_of_Pesach

It's pure speculation to imagine that Jews in the 1st Century ate their Passover meals in any particular order. And there would have been rather extreme differences between a celebration of the first night of Passover during Jesus' time, which was during the time of the Temple and therefore would have involved consumption of the Paschal lamb, which was a central part of the Passover ritual at the time.

KSLS Rocks said...

I read the blog every day. I always laugh and enjoy each one. Here's the thing, though:

Is it sad that I quit bringing a book to read during my lunchbreak at work because I spend that time reading the comments in the Epcot worthy posts?

Sam said...

Also, in terms of the presence of yeast, not only can't we make things out of flour if yeast is used in the building, we can't make things out of (wheat, spelt, rye, oats, or barley) flour if the flour hasn't been made into matzo first. Matzo must be baked within 18 minutes of the flour first getting wet. This is because there can be airborne yeast and dough may leaven spontaneously if allowed to sit for too long (although usually dough doesn't leaven appreciably in that short a time. The 18-minute limit is a pretty extreme precaution).

Mikki said...

"Let Them Eat Cake said...

Joining you in the bunker. Please pass the Manischewitz. What are you watching? Oh, "The Hebrew Hammer". Good choice."

Bahahahaha! Best comment! Made me actually laugh out loud.

<3 CakeWrecks!

First thing I break Passover with tonight might have to be cake, in honor of this post. Mmmm.... cake...

masterpiecelost said...

Personally, I love the fact there are passover cakes, the irony is too delicious. I really didn't think you'd end up covering this holiday just because of, you know, the lack of cakes traditionally included in this holiday. Too bad it turned into an epcot, I thought your post was hysterical. Too many people stuck in semantics.

diddleymaz said...

Are Daiseys kosher?

Sam said...

My kashrut diatribe has been preempted by Lauren's!

Interestingly while some yeasts are kosher for Passover (such as those used in making wine), others (like nutritional and breadmaking yeasts) are not because they're usually cultivated in a grain-based medium and it's impossible to completely extricate the yeast from the grain products in a way that satisfies the rabbis.

Marnie said...

I came back to read the Epcot posts and loved Ellen's song!
Also laughed at Kate's (7:32) Cajun seder and the Buddhist seder.
"Sandra Lee" (closes bunker)

This whole post had me laughing, but the comments had me laughing just as hard. I love this blog!

Elizabeth Schildkret said...

Wow. That's all I can say. Wow.

I'm not sure which is more astoundingly stupid, the cakes or the responses here.

Ellen said...

Wait -- did I see people criticising someone for not knowing how to spell Guy Fawkes?

Two more Dayenu verses! :-)


I cherish those who rightly spell,
Or try to do their research well,
But errors never make me yell, Dayenu.

Refrain

So? Someone thought the name was Fox,
An Epcot maker always “hocks
A chainik,” nags, or even mocks, Dayenu!

Refrain

Stephanie said...

Love the blog, always gives me a good laugh. Our church does a Seder and it's certainly nothing like a real, meaning Jewish, Seder. So I suppose the term Jewish Seder could be useful to make that distinction.

And now I know what an Epcot is after reading the FAQ.

I'm curious what all those deleted posts said. Were they really inappropriate or did John and Jen just enjoying deleting every dimwit who decided to point out the cakes were photoshopped?

Anonymous said...

WOOT!! I made a funny- bronze this moment.

Of course, we let the wreckerators in the bumper- someone's got to clean the loo!!
(evil grin)

-Barbara Anne

P.S. The SL couldn't find the bunker with Geraldo Rivera's help and written directions! That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

john (the hubby of JEN) said...

Stephanie,

All the comments that were deleted were due to a Google glitch. For some reason, every comment submitted by "anonymous" was deleted.

Ah well...

john

Anonymous said...

Actually, and don't get me wrong, I looooove this blog and the both of you, but pointing out that you're wrong all the time is really very nice of us. Because no one likes being wrong, right?! You're welcome for enriching your lives through our comments on your blog. <3

:\

TechyDad said...

There are definitely flourless cakes and pastries for Passover, but let me tell you, most of those cakes are "wrecked" long without any icing, sprinkles, etc at all. They taste awful! (Then again, there are some amazing ones from actual bakeries in New York City and other cities.)

@Marama,

All leavened products aren't allowed. Flour can rise if care isn't taken so it is generally not used. (Matzo is used with special flour and baked in a short time so that it doesn't rise.) Most Passover cakes use potato-based flour replacements.

TechyDad said...

May I also add that, after 8 days of matzo and dry Passover cakes, even the worst of the wrecks here began to look good. Obviously, I was suffering from Matzo-intoxication!

Ness said...

I love Cake Wrecks! I have to say, I love Epcots! I learn so much. I'm not ashamed to say, sometimes I don't get the jokes, so people who others think are stating the obvious, are actually helping! I have learned about Epcot, King cakes, Passover, all sorts of things! Keep the Epcots coming!:-) And once I get the joke, I can laugh too, not just nervously giggle in the hope that no one notices my ignorance.
Thanks Jen, John and #1!

Anonymous said...

@ andrea: So how do you decide who gets the afikoman?

Okay, heading to the bunker now. I'll bring my completely Kosher for Passover U(ltra)G(ooey)O(ne). Pass the maccaroons.

Stephenie Daily said...

Actually you should narrow it down to Merry Catholic Lent, or Merry Lutheran/Methodist and probably a few other sects as well, but Baptist don't do lent. :)

Anonymous said...

I suspect that the confusion and apparent arbitrary-ness (is that a word?) of the Passover leavening restrictions are because the rules were established long before M. Pasteur started looking at things under microscopes. Thus the sourdough leavening of grains and some pulses would seem to be a totally different phenomenon from the fermenting of wine, even though the actual yeasts and bacteria involved overlap considerably. And both would probably appear to arise spontaneously from the basic ingredients, so leavening was seen as an innate process rather than as something you added. It makes perfect sense if you look at it with a pre-modern understanding of biological processes.

I do know some UK jews who try to stick to the "spirit" of the rules as they see them: eating modern-technique non-leavened baked goods, but refusing wine or vinegar. Of course, this then annoys the people who follow the very strict letter of the rules about flour, but drink wine as part of the traditional ceremonies. Then you get the argument about whether beating eggs for a cake (or creaming butter and sugar) is permissable, or is just sneaky barracks-lawyering. It makes trying to provide food for a group containing both sides very ... interesting. Especially if your party includes vegetarians and people with serious allergies as well. My fall-back was normally vegan-something (but watching out for nut and seed allergies) with mashed potatoes, and fruit for dessert.

Puppygirl said...

Gary (who seems to be a rather prolific poster today, if one believes that all the "Gary" posts are the same person) @ 1:39 re: Andrea

Thank you for carrying on with that Epcot. I was going to say something about the improbability of making _anything_ with no ingredients, but I didn't want to be blamed for that.

Anonymous said...

ok sorry I know noones gonna read this, but as a pastry chef I have to correct this. Flour is NOT a leavening agent. it is NOT outlawed for passover or anything else. And technically an instant chemical leavener such as baking soda and baking powder would not conflict with the idea behind unleavened bread- to be ready to leave at any moment, not to wait for the bread to rise but be able to bake it immediately. therefore technically a cookie or a cake probably wouldn't have been wrong had such ingredients existed in biblical times. As long as those things arent made with yeast it wouldn't pose a problem.

Brian said...

OMG! The Passover one where you commented about the leavening reminded me of a advertisement I read a couple of years ago from a restaurant offering a special meal for Hannukah:Ham

Amy K said...

As one of the Kaufmans to whom the cake was addressed, I can tell you that the apostrophe was extraneous.

Gotta say, we're all tickled pink we made it onto the site! Happy Passover Kaufman's indeed :-P