Like this:
And abbreviations can sure be problematic:
Thanks Terry P., Stefani C., Cindy G., Tyler H., Christine M., & Lindsay W., although after these wrecks I think I need to sit a spell.
When professional cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong.
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A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
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81 comments | Post a Comment
Wait, was that "Mathew" one written on a latte?! O_o
Either that, or that's some EXTREMELY frothy icing! :D
Carmiehead, the Un-Stalker
WV: "phering" I'ma phering the wurst 'bout these hear mispellin's.
I think that last one is "Bed or Luck Lindsay".
I thought it was a pirate cake... "our prayers AAR with you."
I'm seeing AAR rather than Aur, which makes it a pirate cake. Not sure it fits with the message, though.
It's sew hard two get these wright!
"Aur"??? Really? REALLY??
And I thought it was bad when people couldn't tell the difference between "are" and "our". It never occurred to me that they would make a mash-up.
The upside is that maybe kids today will find it easier to understand and enjoy Chaucer and other pre-standardized-spelling authors....(I can always hope, right?)
Pretty sure that first cake came out of the kitchen of a French restaurant - "Appy Birthday, Roberta" (say it in your best french accent and it makes sense).
It luks tu me lyk the 3rd kayk had an eria that was skraypt off and the existing riting was added abuv it.
I luv thees kayks!!
Maybe the first one is a carrot cake for their Appaloosa named Roberta...?
I'm not sure "Mathew" with one T is a wreck; I've actually met a Mathew, and I've also met a Scot, both with one T. But it boggles the mind if a wreckerator took so much time to make sure the unusual spelling of a name was correct while neglecting to check if any of other standard English words were.
Well when I put Happy Birthday on a cake I make it in all caps other then the h in Birthday. It's sort of my way of signing my cakes.
No, no, no! "Ready in 5 Mutant Ninja Turtles!" How could you have misconstrued something so simple??
Lindsay, you either have bed or luck, you can't have both. I don't know if I could make that decision, I really really like my bed!
As a former special education teacher, these were quite easy to read.
I'm glad my former students have found employment. I miss each and every one of them and I wish you would stop kritisizing them.
I didn't know a cookie could be ready in 5 mountains... what is that in metric?
Bed or luck? Which will she choose?! The suspense is killing me!
And a shout-out to Mathew: Yoo-hoo! (But I think that one actually calls for running alongside a train at the station, waving a hankie.)
wv: dinsups- A word for wreckies who are conflicted about what to call the evening meal.
here's what's really sad...the cake with Appy ... that's written on the PLATE. it would be really SIMPLE to wipe off teh chocolate sauce and try again. it's not like you'd have to scrape it off the cake.
Maybe the wreckorator for the first one had a Cockney accent? And, I'll admit, the last one had me stumped until I read your caption. Well done. Well done indeed.
It's a straight choice between "bad" or "luck". I know which I'd choose :)
Flashing back to FalkerSatherhood right now LOL
I didn't know a cookie could be ready in 5 mountains... what is that in metric?
22 hills.
- Cheryl
Did anyone else want to say "Guv'nuh" after the first one? You know, like, "Cheerio" and all that? Someone? Anyone? No? *oknevermindthen*
Poor Lindsay has to choose between a bed and luck. Why can't a girl have both? I needed a giggle right now.
Hey! Someone spelled her name the same way as me!
See, I ain't the only one.
My first thought was that the first cake was a (very tall) bee hive and they were doing a play on words with apiary.
wv: propre - appropiate for this post.
No no no, that's not a dotted "u" on that cake. It clearly says:
Our Prayers Aur Wirth You
Yes, you are worthy of our prayers. Or our prayers are worthy of you. Or something like that.
Maybe the customer had the Cockney accent and it was a phone order. We certainly know how literal-minded / opposed to double-checking wreckerators can be.
@Anne-with-an-e, I'm a Scot -- in that I have Scottish ancestors.
I think written Modern English will soon be as incomprehensible to modern readers as Old or Middle English -- except to someone fluent in text-speak. Perhaps legions of teenagers will find employment as 'scribes' (great news for parents, but...?). Be afraid. Be very afraid.
I'm a little in shock. Surely those are gag cakes, right?
Right?
See now, I thought it said bed or lick.
The first one reminds me of when I went to a restaurant in So Cal where they wrote on the plate: "Jappy Birthday!" Hey! It makes sense if your first language is Spanish!
When I want a laugh...I go to Cake Wrecks...love it
methinks English is a second language to these people. or they're high school dropouts.
and you just know "Gud Luck" and Lindsay's cake were done by someone new on the job (check out the shaky piping skills), someone who doesn't DO that job, you know, like the guy mopping the floor who's flagged down by a customer while the bakery staff was on a break and they insisted he do the cake?
Either that, or a 5 year old. That's how they spell. And probably they can't manage a piping back (look at the wimpy, shaky piping job)
I'm with Carrie and mimi. That's definitely "AAR" and it's clearly a pirate cake. But I could also swear that it says "prayers aar WIRTH you." So who is this "Wirth" fellow?
"Appy Birthday Roberta. U aar h-less!"
@Anne-with-an-e: The Wrecky part is the "yoe", not the name ;)
Bed or Luck (I hope it was an L) Lindsay sounds like a weird proposition
If you look closer, it is "Appy Biday" written on the plate, which leads me to believe that Roberta was celebrating the completion of her bathroom renovations in a fancy French restaurant. Unfortunately the "decorator" must not be able to spell in either French or English...
On another note, why is it that most of those horrible spelling catastrophes look like the perpetrator is terrified that their supervisor will get wise to the fact that they are just flying by the seat of their pants and don't really know how to spell?
Why are you hating on Mississippi?
I think it's supposed to be "Best of luck." What a shame; the cake's so pretty aside from the writing.
Now, to be fair, that first one isn't really a cake, it's just a slice on a plate, so it's not like the inscription was piped by a professional cake decorator. More likely a Latino line cook with a squeeze bottle of sauce.
And anyone who can -write- on a -latte- gets my vote, even when they get a little sloppy.
Bed or luck... I choose bed. After all, luck can turn, but my bed will always be here.
Two phunny.
Tante: Mississippi has an unfortunately high illiteracy rate. Compared to the rest of the country, anyways.
There is such thing as a dotted U. Like this:
Üüüü
But serously, I once had a cake I had to have (over the phone) someone write my name on it. My name is tricky. It happens to be Morgana Rose. Yeah. Seriously. But instead I got a cake that said:
"Morgan, Anna, Rose, Happpy. Brthdy!"
I never forgot that.
- AvengersWasp(AKA Morgana Rose, AKAA Morgan Anna Rose)
Oh yes, Marcy W. I can't stop thinking "Appy Birthday, Guvna!" Too funny. Now I feel like watching My Fair Lady.
ack - shouldn't there be some sort of requirement for cake decorators... like a Kindergarten Diploma?
"aur" made me want to throw something - like that cake.
(and after reading all the comments, I don't think it was a Mississippi haters issue - but the fact that it would have been a riot to see the wreckers try to spell the name of the state - really... I'm sure Mississippi is lovely)
Actually, they are trying to tell you that the second cake will be ready in 5 Mutant Ninja Turtles...
I thought the "Mississippi" part was that the state's name is difficult (for some people) to spell.
wv: lingni--what might show up on the menu of an Italian restaurant if a Wreckerator did the typesetting
I think that last cake really says "Bed AK Luk Lirdsay" if we assume that the triangle with a circle is a "d". Or maybe it's "Bed Luk AK Lirdsay". Anybody been to Bed Luk, Alaska?
WV- rater. See you rater, alligator.
I think that last one was done with someone with rheumatoid arthritis.
Maybe it's just because 10th-grade vocab words stick with me, but I have to second an earlier poster: My immediate reaction to the "Appy" cake was, "Well, that IS a beehive, and 'apiary' is a beekeeping word." While I usually am as appalled as others at insane mistakes, I can't imagine anyone seriously forgetting the "H" on "Happy." Let's quit buzzing about this one.
In the bakers' defense, letters are stupid. Espicially when it takes part of your slacking-off time to write them. And sometimes I like to make new words, too. Like "strinkles". Which is a jacked-up version of sprinkles. Gotta love jacked-up words. :)
-B
$20.00 for a cake that says "Gud luck"! These are sad,very sad and make my he'd ake!
From Wikipedia
MNT can stand for:
Sodium maleonitriledithiolate, a ligand in chemistry
Molecular nanotechnology
Men's National (Soccer) Team
/mnt, directory including mount points
the ISO 4217 code for the currency of Mongolia, see Mongolian tögrög
myNetworkTV, an television broadcast syndication service
Mononitrotoluene, or meta-nitrotoluene
Medical News Today, a web aggregator for news in the field of medicine
My Neighbour Totoro
Micro Nanotechnology
Maternal and Neonatal Tetanus - a serious public health problem in developing countries
Maintenance kits
MnT, the creative team of Matt Stone and Trey Parker best known for the animated sitcom South Park on Comedy Central.
Medical Nutrition Therapy
Mutant Ninja Turtles (teenage)
Minna No Tengoku- an online discussion board
MNT, a transcription factor
"Order Nor ready 5 mth"
Luckily, my birthday IS in June...
Perhaps the first one is an attempt by Joe's Diner and Lube to get a shout-out from the snooty restaurant reviewer who only likes fancy restaurants. Unfortunately, it is the line cook's first day, he just out of prison, and he doesn't understand Joe's British accent.
Epic Fail. Every time I look at this, I can’t help but think that this is to big of a coincidence. Me and my friends jacked-up the word sprinkles at least a million times today. Versions included strinkles, strinklies, striles, and sprinklies.
I still want sprinkles. And a cake with correct spelling (for ONCE, please let someone actually spell everything correctly! [ my faith in good cakes is being ruined!]).
-B
I think that that last one is supposed to say best of luck. But bed or luck is much funnier. :D
whhooked on fonics wurked fur mee
Holy Carp!!! (yeah, reverse those 2 middle letters)
$19.99 for Gud Luck?? How much for Good Luck?? And what's a "gud" anyway? I know cows chew cud and I lost a shoe in mud once. "Pud" used to be a rude word to call someone. Bud is on a flower, dud is a good think with a bomb, can you have a single sud??
-Barbara Anne
I guess that's what you get for ordering now--in 5 minutes, we really don't have time to space it correctly to fit the entire word, so we'll just make do with the key letters so you can figure the rest out yourselves...
And why would you make a 'sign' out of the giant cookie? Is this supposed to be like those homes with signs for their landscaping business stuck in a really pathetic looking yard--where you hope it's just that they are so busy making masterpieces out of everyone else's yards that they don't have the time or energy to do their own, and that their yard is not a true representation of their work??
I think the misspellings on Mathew's dessert distract from the real question--what on earth is that? It looks kind of like a sushi roll, but with foam instead of rice...
Turns out there are at least two people named "Gud Luck" on Facebook, so maybe the cake was for one of them. Not sure what those little shiny balls above the curling ribbon really are--small round candles? (I see wicks??)
Poor Lindsey. Whoever wrote that on her cake was either drunk or in a very big hurry to make sure she got her cake. Lol scary wreckerators..maybe I should be one for Halloween and scare the neighborhood.
The chocolate sauce around the cake...
I totally read that as "Sappy Birthday" which then made me come up with a mental list of all other potential options you could put on someone's cake.
Crappy Birthday! - for you toilet trained 2yo.
Sappy Birthday! - for young love
Nappy Birthday! - for great-grandpa
Cappy Birthday! - for your favorite baseball fan!
Fappy....uh....let's not go there...
Flappy Birthday! - for the pet bird
Gappy Birthday! - perfect for the 7yo missing a few teeth
Rappy Birthday - for the 16yo across the street that insists on rattling your windows with his new stereo
My mind must be weird.
If it's going to take five months to deliver the cake it better be good.
Sometimes I can forgive some of the decorators mistakes that show up (especially since I'm pretty sure I just misspelled decorator....twice now). But 'Gud'...there's no excuse for that.
I can understand that, in a low-paying job category, some may have poor literacy skills-- so words like "abysmal" would be a challenge. But words like "good" or "better" or "are" or "happy" are at the Grade 2 level!
#1 I think people's hypothesis of French or Spanish speaker make some sense...
#2 You can have fast or accurate, but not both!
#3 They love his toes to a "t" (but not the rest of him?)
#4 flotsam, no decoration, terribly piped horrendously mis-spelled words, for $20?! How did they get "luck" right and not "good"? And given the shakiness, I think they need a doctor...
#5 It's nicely lettered-- I can see how "with" happened: they were so busy focusing on the lettering they lost count of the bumps. But "aur"?
#6 someone with a bad cold phoned in the order? Notice they couldn't spell either "better" or "luck", but they got "Lindsay" right? Or else Lindsay isn't getting lucky tonight...
It wouldn't surprise me if the person who was behind cake number one was a Cockney. "'Ow do ya spell 'appy, any-oo?"
Katie F.
I think the wreck that says "Mathew" on it is a cookie or some kind of wafer. It looks like a hand behind it, unless that is a foot which would be a wreck of another kind.
I just asked my Kindergartner son how to spell good. His answer "G-O-O-D" I'm thinking that cake decorating is not in his future- he can spell!
WV: balne- My balne has a first name. It's O-S-K-R. My balne has a second name, it's "What is it? I can't read this order form. I'll just have to make up the rest. The Weinermobile will be here to pick up their Hot Dog cake in 10 minutes."
I first saw "Our Prampers Aar Wuth You."
-Jacob
Is it just me or is it really hard to believe sometimes that these are actually made by professionals? The one for Lindsay, for instance, has a frosting flower that looks reasonably well made, but then the lettering looks like it was done by a kindergartener.
Many of them I really do believe, and those are the ones that crack me up and make me love this blog so much!
Oh no. I recognize the cake in picture #1 from the Italian chain restaurant I work at. Yikes. Who let that out of the kitchen???
If it's any consolation the cake itself is very good (that enormous slice is the typical serving size).
Honestly, one would think that decent literacy and handwriting skills would be non-negotiable in hiring cake decorators who are going to be let loose on the writing part.
I didn't think no 1 was a beehive, looks more like a wedge of cake to me. I agree with Ferralyn, my first thought was it was in a French patisserie :-)
As an intelligent Mississippian, I can predict that you just ticked off all of your Mississippi readers. Not a smooth move.
If the first one had an apostrophe before the "Appy" I would have accepted some sort of Eliza Doolittle tribute.
Victoria,
You have it wrong. The idea was that the decorator probably saw "Good luck in Mississippi" on the order form and gave up because Mississippi is too hard to spell. And, if you think about it, by default, if the destination was Mississippi, the point of origin for the cake would have to be anywhere but Mississippi.
john
Boo don't hate on Mississippi! - Louren
I think it says "Bed or Lick Lindsay". Oh the choices, but I'm not sure where she's been.
Pssst! "Mtn" stands for "mountain", not "mnt".
Gud luck... he's texting!!!
:D
--Jane age 10
Appy birthday? Oh, I know! They made it for an app maker!