Monday, January 18, 2010

Better Late Than Never: Happy New Year!

Monday, January 18, 2010

I guess technically I *did* wish y'all a Wreckalicious new year back on the 1st, but so many late, great New Year's Wrecks have come in that I figured an encore was called for.

Let's kick things off with some of the most creative letter cramming I've seen:

To err is human, and to arr is pirate - but to kill the "r" by stomping on it with a "yea" is allll Wreckerator.


Speaking of creative, I didn't know we could write 2010 as a fraction!

May your 2010 be at least 2% better than 2009.
And may all your zeros have squishy yellow handles.


Something tells me this martini was shaken, not stirred:

And aren't you glad you have me here to tell you that was supposed to be a martini?


This year, let's remember to celebrate all of the punctuation marks:

Yep, here's to you, "!"! Next week we'll raise our glasses to the semicolon.


And, of course, I saved my favorite for last:

It's hard to appreciate a Wreckerator who's this far ahead of his/her time.


Jami R., Berry D., Hannah, Jamie P., Pam S., & Katie C., since the new year has already started, I'm just going to wish you a happy new "yea." So. yeah.

- Related Wreckage: The Elephant in the Room
Christine said...

And a happy new yea to you! Hilarious!

Taylor@MyOlderBrothers said...

So does that mean the expiration date on the last one is also 20010? Because that's a long shelf-life.

shikishinobi said...

I enjoy playing with numbers, and I don't even make a living out of it. But now that I have seen these, you ahve opened my eyes to exactly what I could do with numbers. And I thought 10/6 was bad enough. But no, let us take 2% off 20010 in 2010, and make a Happy New Yeav about it. What could be better?

Evalis said...

I dunno, i kind of like to think we are dividing by zero rather than running at 2%.

You know, doing the impossible rather than being lazy sods.

There you see? Great meaning hidden in the cake, there is. *nods*

Shauna said...

Let's just hope that last cake wasn't left over from 2009 and repurposed for 2010. Ew.

SAM said...

I actaully liked the cupcake 2%..in an abstract sort of way

Fluffy Cow said...

20010... I love it. And I may never look at a martini the same again...

Abby Normal said...

The fourth care isn’t a New Year cake. Note the capitalization. It’s a baby announcement birth cake for a child named To.

The 'splorin' Wolfies said...

i am not aloud to laugh this hard after surgery

Pangolin said...

Goodness, I thought only my six year old was confused about writing the year as 20010. Yikes!

Sheila Bennett said...

Great cakes today! Can't decide if my favorite is the 2% one or the 20010 year. :)

Anonymous said...

Yes, I am glad you explained the martini cake-- at first, I thought that we were celebrating Bingo night.

Al, Wendy, Max, and Lil said...

I know this may get old...but your comments are as funny if not funnier than the wrecks! We love visiting your site!

Deb Geisler said...

My goodness! Even that far in the future, they have cake! With balllloooonss!

Bek said...

Wow. It would have taken me a really really long time to get that Martini one...

And perhaps that one cake is only selling for 2& of its normal price since they wreckerator was feeling so generous...

Anonymous said...

20010? In that case, feh on 2012. The cake prophets have spoken. Whew!

Nathan said...

Fantastic! I'll be laughing for days at "And may all your zeros have squishy yellow handles."

Julie said...

Wow what a stellar collection of wrecks! Hard to know which is my favorite, the celebration of punctuation or the 20010.

And I personally think on the first cake the "R" has had too much champagne and the "A" is prodding "R" with his foot to make sure he's okay.

Amber Joy said...

20010! LOVE IT! Now everybody, raise your "martini" glasses to 20010!

Anonymous said...

Here's to @ and & and : and ? and Happy New Year to () ! ;

Gary said...

Thanks for the New Year wishes!
I guess this covers now through 20010.

And Winter, underlined, to you, too, Jen, John, and all fellow wreckophiles!

Anonymous said...

I think that last cake is actually left over from the year 2000.

deckardcanine said...

I wonder if the writer of "Here is To !" is ESL. Somehow, not shortening to "Here's" makes it ten times as awkward.

Suzanne Dargie said...

How do these people stay employed?!

Stephanie said...

"And may all your zeroes have squishy yellow handles." That cracked me up, big time.
Thanks for the chuckle; I needed that! :)

Half Assed Kitchen said...

Who hired my four-year-old to decorate their cakes???

Julie said...

Looks like someone had one tee many Martoonies before they picked up the piping bag today.

Rattlesnake said...

I wouldn't have known what the second CCC was if you hadn't pointed it out. But are you sure the "martini" CCC isn't Powerball numbers? "I hope you get lucky in 2010!"

Anonymous said...

Is that last cake in honor of a sperm count? I don't know what a good number would be, but people out celebrating will toast just about anything after a while.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious, as ever!

And, I'll admit, I have spent WAY too much time over the last twenty minutes staring at that 2% cake and struggling to think of a celebratory event that would actually warrant a cake with "2%" on it...

Anonymous said...

Any ideas on what the back story COULD be for that 2% celebration?
Just asking.
Mocking

Anonymous said...

I'm afraid that 20010 cookie is going to be a little stale by the time it is appropriate to cut into it.

jess said...

LOVE the last one.

Kinzie said...

I love semi-colons.

sendingtheclowns said...

Go ahead--MAKE fun!
But, if you look closely, you may notice that the *Martini* has had just about ENOUGH of it all, and is right now -as we speak(so to speak)--teetering on the very edge of the showcase, contemplating whether or not to hurl itself to the floor (which is very shiny, by the way) and end it all.
What a way to start a new year ("Cleanup on aisle four!")...


It's pretty sad, actually.

jessica said...

hahaha these are great. especially that last one!

foxfunds said...

One of these days I will learn to NOT read about these Wreckerators while having a beverage - because my computer ends up with it instead...

20010 - wow... And that martini with powerball numbers is insane...

jterry said...

I'm glad all the residents of my zip code have been wished a happy new year by that last cake. I wonder if it has something to do with our post office being shut down...

The Boob Nazi said...

I love this website.

Gary said...

If I could get a mortgage at 2% interest, I would certainly celebrate it.

Scarlett said...

This is really amazing!!! Definitely made my morning!

Scarlett@CheekyDebutantes

bibberly said...

The high school where I work updated the senior info packet by doing a "find and replace" on the "9" in the 2009 booklet, so all 30 pages of the packet referred to the students' graduation year as 20010. So I guess that last cake is for us!

SiriusSchwartz said...

That last one is pretty funny. I'm guessing the martini one is to be assembled once it is out of the packaging. It is still butt ugly, but I don't think that packaging represents the final presentation.

Anonymous said...

These cupcakes are made with 2% milk. You know, the way Kraft American "cheese" slices are about 2% milk.

I think whatever's in these two products, they're more closely related to each other than to milk. Or cheese.

Anonymous said...

These cupcakes are made with 2% milk. You know, the way Kraft American "cheese" slices are about 2% milk.

I think whatever's in these two products, they're more closely related to each other than to milk. Or to cheese.

Miranda said...

IDGI!!! How can an actual adult churn out something this bad?

rhonda said...

I almost choked on my lunch when I got to the 20,010 cake. That might be the funniest thing I've seen on this blog.

Elisabeth Marie said...

Would have never guessed that was a Martini...

andygirl said...

Hell yeah, here's to the exclamation point! I am ALL on board for celebrating punctuation.

Melissa (& Billy) said...

Maybe the Wreckorators had had a biiiit too much the night before?

"Happy *hic* New Yea--oh, ran outta room. Here." *pipes wonky R* "There we go. All *hic* done."

The others, I dunno, and maybe I don't want to!

Megan said...

I still think the Martini cake resembles a falling stock chart. you can even see the numbers that fell off on the bottom!

Molly said...

maybe the 2% one was at a milk convention? like "happy new year from Hood!"

Bonnie said...

Jen, your commentary is always fabulous and lately it has been out of this world--must be those Saturdays "off". I went back to the Poo Post and lost it again. The combo of the wrecks, the commentary and the posted comments just had me laughing outrageously again. Today's post is yet another gem. Thanks so much for all the effort you put into making us have to explain to our bosses why we are requisitioning the third keyboard in as many months because coffee keeps ending up in it.

So here is a toast to you...with a bingo-esque martini glass! May your 20010 be so much more than 2% better than last year...and all your zeros have yellow squiggly handles!

~Bonnie

Anonymous said...

20010?

Is there a hole in the space-time continuum at the bakers, so they can sell cakes in the future?

Stoich91 said...

HAAAA! :) Amazing...very funny; saturday's off do not hinder the funniness, it seems. :)

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to celebrate the semicolon; you rarely see it used properly.

Anonymous said...

I thought the martini cake was a pool game, oops! As for the 20010 cake, you have two options, either put the cake in the freezer and you'll be all set for that years celebration, or just eat one of the middle 0 balloons yourself before serving the cake. Um, on second thought, maybe just find a cake that says 2010, or Happy New Yea...that one's timeless :)

Jiminycricket said...

Is that pronounced, "twenty-oh-ten?"

As in, it's no longer, "twenty-oh-nine?"

sendingtheclowns said...

You know, if these early specimens are any indication of what marvels we have to look forward to in this fresh new year...
Anyway, my coffee grounds tell me that it's going to be a stellar year for Cake Wrecks!

(Could there perhaps be another book in the mixing bowl?)
=^??^=

Rose said...

I caught myself saying "oh-10" I don't know how many times a couple weeks ago. genius that I am.

**Heard you on NPR this weekend - squee! My kids were all "hey, is that the funny cake lady?" Great Job!!

smauge said...

Stop making me laugh - I have a face mask on!!!
(that 20010 was the end of me)

Vanessa said...

That's the smallest olive I've ever seen, or the biggest martini glass...

It never fails to amaze me what people will put on a cake. On each one you can sorta see where the decorator was going, yet they never quite achieved their goal. I should probably step back from my own creations more often and honestly evaluate whether or not my work is saying what I want it to say!

Florida Gator said...

Based on the size of the "olive" that martini is HUGE!!!! It will be 20010 before the hangover's gone...

Melinda said...

Here is To! ... the best example of an "infinitive" cake I've ever seen! No hemming, hawing or splitting -- just BANG -- To! Now when someone asks me to explain an infinitive, I'll just point them to this image. Thanks for many laughs and more to......

Fanboy Wife said...

I've actually had a few people ask me, "If we wrote '09' before, why don't we write '010' now?"

Sarah said...

I'm so 20010, you so 2000 and then?

Bree said...

The last cake was decorated by The Doctor himself, after he landed his TARDIS on New Year's Day 20010.

Rachael said...

What? It's 20010? Where are my flying cars, and space ships, and immortality?! Will someone please think of the children!

Seriously though, these wrekerators need to go back to decorating school. I only took one decorating class and I can probably do better.... once I take the fondant class that is.

kt said...

That first cake was probably made in Boston and the wreckerator was just being true to the local dialect.

Anna said...

Wiping tears of laughter from my face! So glad I came across your site.

NinjaRaven said...

the one cake proves that wreckerators will be the end of the universe - a critical mass of cakes with division by zero will obviously cause the implosion of logic of the universe, destroying it completely.

hmm... I suppose that makes this site somewhat dangerous. make sure you keep these cakes in non-critical groupings! you could be the end of us all!

wv - dises: dises the worst set of new year's cakes i've ever seen.

eeyore19 said...

I'm so glad the 2% cake got posted! That's almost identical to the one I saw at Walmart on New Year's Eve.

(And if it's 2% milk, what's the other 98%?)

wackplayer said...

Right, here's a Happy New Year's holler to all the paper-pushers who now have to clean out the forms containing "Date: ________ __,200_"

Sixxlet said...

The last one really makes me wonder just HOW stupid the decorator was.

Michelle said...

NOOOooooo! In the second cake it looks like they are trying to divide By ZERO!! Oh THE HUMANITY!!... *ahem*...
you know you are a math nerd when you see that and panic slightly...

maxon said...

It's a kind of multipurpose celebratory exclamation:

Happy New YEA!

See, you could use that for anything. Multipurpose cake. New baby? Happy New YEA! Newly married? Happy New YEA! New job? Happy New YEA! New degree? Happy New YEA? (Alright, alright I know I'm pushing it).

Jill of Ark said...

I need to remember not to read these at work because I always end up laughing out loud and my collegues look at me like I'm nuts.

"2%" had me in tears as it was. And then I got to "20010"...

I might be getting a call from HR soon.

Tom said...

Happy 200010! Yes! I am VERY glad you were here and had the wherewithal to recognize that martini cake. I never would have guessed!

Mandy said...

And here I was thinking that "martini" cake was a Salvador Dali knock off. :-/

Anonymous said...

The 20010 cake is one of many reasons to say TWENTY-TEN.

Sexy Sadie said...

Wow! How did you get a cake from 20010? Here is To ! Cake Wrecks

Sabrina said...

The last one had me laughing out loud, so loud I scared my baby. - She's crying now. Thanks :-)

Kaitlyn and Daniel said...

that last one made me laugh out loud!

Michelle said...

2% omg. Thank you so much for the belly laugh, I needed that.

Anonymous said...

So i think that "martini" cake is supposed to be a billiards table... just saying. I mean its got balls with numbers, and a table with a stick going across it.

Anonymous said...

"semicolon" what I had after surgery. Let's celebrate with cake!

Cupcakes Lady said...

I used to like A Martini. Not so sure now. Might try something different...for a while. ;) xx