Saturday, May 9, 2009

For Mom: The Mother of all Wrecks

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Moms, this one's for you:



There are no words, Jesse Y. Not after that.
Anonymous said...

Woo, first. (: haha wow that cake sucks.

Anonymous said...

"My arms to huge you" belong on yesterday's flying tube socks CCC...

Kashmir said...

Words simply elude me.....

E.E.King said...

WOW.
that's a syntactic abomination.

I like how they tried to slip in the "e" after hug to eek out any semblance of sense from the sentence....fail.

Viewtiful_Justin said...

Holy yikes! That's the most inappropriate Mom's day cake I've ever seen. It seems a little...desparate and amorous.

And...how exactly would you "huge" her?

Erica said...

The best part is the "huge" - looks like the decorator wrote hug, and then decided it didn't look quite right... "I know, I'll add an e!"

Anonymous said...

My eyes cry to look at this cake. How exactly do you "huge" someone? It sounds painful.

VanessaS said...

My 9 yo, looking over my shoulder, said, "Are they trying to SELL that junk?"

Yes, dear. They are. *snicker*

brooke @ claremont road said...

My arms to HUGE you.... yes. Yes, indeed.

Twasthebrilligandtheslithytoves said...

whaaat? LOL

Anonymous said...

Wow! Omg. Ewwww.
Ugly, misspelled, spacing problem, PLASTIC flowers, the creepiest nessage from or to a mom!
I tolerate the use of some plastic flotsam when the design is too complicated for the average chain wreckorater to replicate.
But flowers??? Aren't fowers the first thing you learn to do? Aren't they the best part to eat? Why? Why? Why?
I would be so disappointed to receive this cake. Still can't figure out if it is to or from mom, but since I'm a mother and a daughter, I am horrified from both directions!!

Alex

WV: kniti
I am going to have to go kniti for a while and calm down.

Ddc said...

Oedipus, line one. YIKES!

And what exactly do arms do when they "huge" you?

Athena said...

Run away Mom - run away very fast!

heather said...

OMG...is this too mom or from mom! Nothings says huges and kisses like a badly made cookie cake with all kinds of creepy sentiments and plastic flower ornament attached. Even if it were spelt correctly, I find the sentiment just a little too intimate for a mother and child. Well, someone has to keep the mental health professionals employed.

The Cake Lady said...

Wow....
People pay for stuff like that...amazing!
Thanks for always giving me something to smile at, and making me take a second look at every cake I deliver!!
Shelley

Leah Hollett said...

wow. just wow.

Leah Hollett said...

wow. just wow.

Anonymous said...

Aside from the obvious disturbing elements of this cake, what do you suppose one would call that color? Burnt melon? Desiccated salmon? Mmm.

-kate

Ceci said...

Let's not fail to appreciate that the word "cry" was initially misspelled ("crie?") and corrected as well!

Stacie said...

Anyone else notice that the Cry is bolded? I wonder if that was on purpose? I know it made me cry.

A said...

Did anyone notice how they appear to have written 'cre' or maybe 'crie' and then written a y over it to get 'cry'? I'm surprised we didn't end up with 'hugy'.

Shadow said...

I think some of these stores are purposely selling this crap so customers can buy it and try to pass it off as their own, after all, only a mother would appreciate them and then only if decorated by their 5yr old. Actually, my 5yr old could do better than that!

YUK.

Sarah :) said...

Might I point out you didn't cover the store's label on the picture? I don't know if that's necessary because of copyright laws or something, but I thought I would point it out.
Because, you know, there's really nothing to be said for that cake. Other than "they did what!?"

Tristan's Mom said...

Yikes. The scarily (my own wreck word!) inappropriate message plus the obvious misspellings. Great cake! Er, wreck. =-0

Anonymous said...

The short version:
Mom, I have an Electra Complex.

linz said...

$7.99 if you buy a card with it--but what could a card possibly say that the cake didn't? haha

Cora said...

That looks like a very bad translation from babble fish? I am so glad they caught that missing "e" in huge.

Donna said...

Wow....what an ugly orange. If my kid gave me that, I'd throw it at him LOL

arms to huge you? Mom's been eating too much cake *g*

WV: ateratin "Maw, I's showin muh ateratin by gittin yer uh cak!"

Anonymous said...

Don't you mean "Not after thate'?

There are noe wordes indeede.

Vashti said...

SICK!!!! sounds a bit pervy!

Tindy said...

...If I were a mum I think I'd be kind of insulted with that line. "My eyes cry to see you." Not to see me go? Or to see me again? Just the sight of me makes you cry? Ugh!

Jenna said...

Wow, if this is "From" mom...it sounds just like my overly dramatic mother in law.

skinny minny said...

Of course spotted the huge but then was completely confused trying to figure out what Xiss was took a bit to get that it was Kiss not Xiss! Guess they thought the X in X and O was for kiss?

Arlynn said...

Ha! This is a great one... nothin says I love you, Mom like a huge arm hug & Xiss : - )

Hilarity.

Cody said...

My eyes cry to see you. My arms to smash(e) you. My piping bag to correct you. cake.

Amy said...

Oedipus Complex, anyone?

Yeesh!

~Amy B.

Squidley said...

Oh. My. God.

Haiku Joy said...

Despondent frosting -
Freud and Hallmark's progeny?
My oh my oh my.

wv: conshly

Vickie, the lush, drank conshly.

Tiffany said...

A little disturbing!

Tonee said...

Something about this is just...wrong. Wrong wrong wrong.

TheWritersVoice said...

It seems to me that maybe this was more for a person whose mother has passed on - that would make more sense. Still - the kiss part is a leeeeeeetle over the top and CREEPY.

Maybe it was originally created for long-distance lovers, and then the wreckerator decided to try to make use of it for Mother's Day!

deedee said...

One of my kids give me a cake like that - I'm running away from home.

the three amigos said...

It looks like they spelled 'hug' correctly then went back and added that 'e' to make it huge.

Anonymous said...

If my husband got me a cake that said anything was HUGE I'd kill him. Kill him dead. Even if it's a misspelling, you totally don't put HUGE on Mom's cake! ;)

Marie said...

Wow. That cake is wrong in so many ways.

Biblio Reader said...

Forget the "huge"; even without the "e" and forgetting the creepy sentiment it's weird. The first sentence is "My nouns verb to verb you", and the rest is "My nouns to verb you", so my mind immediately thinks "My arms cry to hug you? Wth?" Because "My arms to hug you" is not a sentence. Oh, wreckiness.

Aurora said...

I don't feel it's necessary to say anything other than EW. That's pretty much all that can be said for that cake.

Rose said...

It sounds like a cake a mom whose child has died would buy, if they were even buying cakes. Sad, creepy, a hideous. Major cake FAIL!

jackie31337 said...

I'm always typing Es at the end of words where they don't belong. My fingers just do it automatically. I don't think I could ever do it in icing though.

Giusi. said...

I WANT TO HUGE YOU SO SO BAD <333
lmaoaoaoa

Cheryl said...

*blinks* Wow. That's...disturbing.

blissfully caffeinated said...

And it looks like the 'e' on "huge you" was added in as an afterthought. The decorator had it almost right with "hug you" but then squeezed that little 'e' in there, thus rendering this cake even more hilarious. Now I'm going to go huge my mom.

Laura said...

"...and my womb to re-admit you."

Yikes!

This wreckerator needs some therapy.

Elizabeth said...

Woohoo, $9.99 well spent dollars for that masterpiece. somebody's mama gonna slap them upside the head for that one



WV: Dimamas
Dimamas gonna have a wonderful day tomorrow

Anonymous said...

MOM: Uh...you've just made me very uncomfortable, honey. Thanks!

--Blue Jean

Tauna said...

Ok I think I would put this cake next to the "no wire hanger" cake. Together, these cakes could give us a peek inside the mind of a psychotic mother who killed her child with a wire hanger and now misses the dear thing with some kind of orange/melon passion.

Um, never mind. Don't put this with that other cake. Keep them far, far away from each other. I need to go scrub my brain...

tracy said...

whoa... that is a scary scary thing

yikes. Im glad I don't know mother or kid...

Anonymous said...

How very -- incestuous.....

Anonymous said...

Orange??? Anyone notice the orange frosting? You have pretty pastel flowers stuck on a Halloween cake, ugh! I would smash that in the face of any child of mine to bring that home.

sendingtheclowns said...

The cake top itself looks like mashed sweet potato.
The piping crap looks like day-glo Play-Doh.
The *lettering* looks like droppings from an ill bird.
The sentiment is probably/maybe FROM a "mom," because there's a period at the end of the "...kiss you"-- although the structure of the entire message is limping along disjointedly.
Actually, it's not just limping; it is in crying, agonizing misery and should be humanely destroyed for the sake of all.

BITTER OLD BITCH said...

*agress with Ddc*

Yeah, that's an Oedipus cake if I ever saw one. EEK!

Anonymous said...

This is creepy

Anonymous said...

The thing is it almost looks like 'mom' is an afterthought. So maybe the cake was slightly less creepy to begin with.

Visione Bella said...

I don't even have words.... yeah. Nothing's coming. Wow.

Visione Bella said...

Oh, and PS, I'm SOOOOO glad different people finally noticed the crie-ing and xissing. Good God, why are these cake decorators still employed?!

Dorci said...

Wow, is it 2 feet from the sun?? What is with that coloring?! Crazy.

Extreme Educators said...

Perhaps the writer of this touching verse did not have English as his/her first language.

Laura said...

And to think, all that for just $7.99!

BITTER OLD BITCH said...

To Laura:

Yeah, but if you notice the price tag it is $7.99 with a Kroger Card only. Non-club-card members have to pay the full masterwreck value of $9.99.

...which could be worth every penny if it goes to an evil stepmom. XD

Alice said...

Apart from the fact that the only person I can think of who would want to send that message to their mother is a guy called Oedipus, and yes the misspelling is wrecky but am I the only one who noticed the colour scheme?

Two clashing but equaly unapatising shades of red, and then theirs the topper...

I guess it's one of those wrecks that gets worse the longer you look at it.

SnowFoxCreations said...

It's an Oedipedal Engrish cake.

The world needed a Cake Wrecks/Engrish crossover, and now it has one. :3

Jessica said...

All I can say is "Huh?"

Amber said...

Eeek! My eyes hurt so from the color scheme, I almost didn't notice the bizarre sentiment!
Wow.

Anonymous said...

Analyze that!

Lauren said...

Huh...I didn't know Oedipus was into celebrating mother's day...

It wouldn't have been so bad if they'd spelled "hug" properly (and how on earth does one misspell a three letter word?)...and if it wasn't addressed to Mom. Creepy. Even if it was from a guy who refers to his wife as "mom" the way some people do, it's creepy, possibly even more so.

jenncgf said...

WHOAH NELLIE!

tera said...

this beats my mothers day tree cake for miles

Me said...

Somebody needs some therapy.

And what COLOR is that anyway?

Hyena Overlord said...

Wow..a cake for Mother Bates.

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

Wow, that is a lot of crying body parts.

Judy said...

How funny, they caught their spelling mistake on crie and changed it to cry and then changed the correct spelling of hug to huge. This person must be a person where English is their second language.

Judy said...

Look where the dot is in the K. It's definitely not an X it's a K. The decorator did get that right. Let's not try to find fault where there isn't any here people.

tottergirl said...

Ok, that is stupid and totally creepy.

Austin said...

That cake made me sad, then it made me laugh. Thank for making me spit milk out of my nose!

Jennie said...

Um, yeah. Can you say Oedipus complex? Nasty. And not to mention the ridiculous spelling error, the cake looks like moldy play-doh. Blech. $7.99 doesn't get you what it used to, eh?

My Yummy Vice Custom Cupcakes said...

These are the most fantastically horrible cakes I have ever seen...

and OMG,..."No coat hangers" WTF not that I would ever summon the courage to taste that cake, but thats a bit distasteful... bahahaha

Raychel said...

Yeah lets hope tomorrow i do not get a cake that has the word "HUGE" in it.

www.mycreativeway.blogspot.com

blah blah said...

Oedipus complex, anyone?

Kelley Marie said...

I'm printing this out and making my mom the most epic Mother's Day card she's ever seen in her 21 years of Malker Sotherhood. She's going to laugh soooo muuuuuch!!!

Trinkets and Charms said...

Oddly enough, my eyes cry to see this XD

~ L. K. said...

Because the second one is about being able to do something, etc, I took the meaning of this to be:

I cry when I see you, you're too large to hug. Loves and kisses!

But I have a feeling the original message (in broken English) is probably more like:

I have eyes to cry when I see you, I have arms to hug you, I have lips to kiss you.

(Note that the first sentence is still really bad. There's no way around it. Crying when you see someone is, no matter what, really, really insulting.)

I think the mom thing at the end is just to point out that it's for Mother's Day.

Essentially the wreckorator failed to grasp the verb to be. We're either missing complex sentences involving to have or more simple sentences with to be. This person would have to be foreign. (Which isn't insulting--better to not have English as a first English and mess up with it than have it your ONLY language and this is how you talk.)

Glory von Hathor said...

Dr Freud to the bakery, STAT.

Anonymous said...

it's so wrong... in so many ways...

if my memory is correct, it's a totally hacked excerpt of a poem about the death of a child.

which brings it to a whole new level of totally awful cakes.

Anonymous said...

aHow rude to do a wreck on sunday sweets day.. and mother's day.. bad form..... i expected more from you....

Alix said...

But what does "my arms to huge you" mean?

Cody said...

"aHow rude to do a wreck on sunday sweets day.. and mother's day.. bad form..... i expected more from you...."

This is most definitely not a Sunday Sweets post.

And you think it's rude for the author to post cake wrecks on a site called "Cake Wrecks"? I'm dumbfounded!

john(the hubby of Jen) said...

Anon @ 9:07,

You can't imagine how OLD it gets reading comments like yours. It's not bad enough getting people who genuinely have a gripe with the post for some reason. Then you come in with your little "I expected more from you" when YOU'RE READING YESTERDAY'S POST!!!

So hey, the Mother's Day Sunday Sweets went up about a minute ago so enjoy!

I'm going back to bed...

john

TheWickedGingersnap said...

Someone mentioned that this...questionable cake inscription has its roots in a poem written to express sorrow at the loss of a child. Does anyone know what the title of the poem was? I'm curious to see how it actually read before getting syntactically butchered...and transformed into a dumbfoundingly creepy attempt at Mother's Day sentiment.

WV: eming: I keep 'eming and 'awing trying to explain this cake.

Fluffy Cow said...

I... uh...

Jo-Anne said...

It looks like a huge pumpkin tart! How appropriate on Mothers Day. I sincerely like the border. It's an attractive shade of artificial colour. The words make me think of an old Beatles song....I've got arms that long to huge you, and keep you by my side...I've got lips that long to Xiss you, and keep you satisfied (Woooo)!

Nathan said...

LOL! Ok. The store this came from apparently doesn't hire the brightest people because time and time again I see their screw ups. Makes for a good laugh though, so keep it coming.

Anonymous said...

Is it me or did they get the wrong special day for the inscription? Hmm.

Jesse said...

Thanks for the great comments everyone! I'm both incredibly proud and sad to had found this!! :-)

-Jesse Y

Anonymous said...

TheWickedGingersnap

I don't remember the title, but I remember reading a poem with " my eyes cry to see you, arms ache to hug you, lips .... to kiss you"

I lost my daughter 5 years ago next month and over the years have read many poems and writings about the loss of a child. sorry but I don't remember the exact poem, and a quick search of google didn't bring it up.

b-

Regina said...

I'm glad to see that you tagged this as "creepy!"

Anonymous said...

Mom needs a pair of scissors for Mother's Day: to cut the apron strings. Yikes!

Tiffster said...

Was this Shia's cake to his mom?

Richard Doyle said...

My eyes cry to see you??

Is that a compliment?

Bree said...

If Hamlet ordered a cake for his mother, this is what it would be. But I bet it still wouldn't make her leave Claudius.

Gladys said...

You know, this is actually the PERFECT cake for Oedipus to give his mom for Mother's Day...

...after all, he DID blind himself, so he wouldn't have been able to see that scary-orange color scheme. (Which is a good thins, as he would have been blinded by the hideousness if he DID still have his sight.)

Kaitlin said...

This reminds me of when that guy on American Idol said he was dedicating the song he was about to sing to his parents...and then proceeded to sing "Let's Get it On"

*~*Lis*~* said...

my eyes are crying alright

I Love Baby Quilts! said...

This reminds me of Ben Stiller in Tropic Thunder when he's playing his Simple Jack character: "My eyes are raining!!!"

Anonymous said...

It looks like "cry" was first spelled "crie" then corrected. This cake is a disaster...and the message is nothing less than sickening.

Jean said...

Obviously this poor woman lost her child. But still... why write it on a cake? I feel bad for her.

Jennifer said...

Group huge!

Anonymous said...

Run mothers! hide your children and never return!

Anonymous said...

My take... sent by someone with limited english, from another continent, to her mom the guest worker. Hugs to all...

Eliz

Jess said...

My favorite part is where they spelled "crie" and then attempted to fix it... but still said "huge"

Anonymous said...

What does Xiss mean?

Anonymous said...

wow sexy......LOL