Friday, April 10, 2009

Easter Potpourri

Friday, April 10, 2009

Easter sure has an interesting assortment of holiday icons, doesn't it? I mean, have you ever stopped to wonder why it's perfectly normal at this time of year to have a big cross combined with a rabbit holding an egg?

What, too philosophical? Ok, then what's with the sweet pastels combined with that eye-wrenching red and yellow combo? Dude, someone thought those bunny picks were actually helping.

You know what screams "Easter" to me? A couple of red, white and blue doughnuts. No, really. Look:

The Christmas-y red and green ones would have been too much of stretch, though. [nodding] Totally.

Here we have the inspiring tale of The Chick Who Took Down Four Bunny Bullies:

"Who's the chicken now, carrot-brains? Huh? Huh?!?"

(I was about to start singing "Be kind to your web-footed friends" but then I realized chickens don't have webbed feet. Drat. Well, moving on...)


Humpty Dumpty was evidently going through his "punk" phase when he fell.

You know how you often hear about folks with amazing hidden talents working mundane jobs, like that cell phone salesman who sings opera? Yeah?

Uh, well, maybe this decorator sings opera.


And finally, this Easter Egg is brought to you by the letters W, T, and F:

Yes, I'm told that's an egg, although it looks more like a yellow volcano covered with green curly shoe laces. It also appears that a small tree fell on it. Uh, guys? Can we get some of those plastic bunny picks over here? We need to "Easter" this sucker up.


Thanks to Wreckporters Katrina S., Cynthia F., Jonah, Jennessa R., Michele E., & Camilla C.!

Psst, hey. You. Yeah, you. Seen a GOOD Easter cake? Then send it to me at Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com. And do it fast, or else I might get, shall we say,
disappointed. You wouldn't want that, now would you?
Anonymous said...

Yikes! The color scheme on the first offends all of the sensibilities my artistic genes can muster (and I actually have some).

The punk-ty Humpty Dumpty is hilarious.

And please tell me I'm not the only one who initially read the decorated-by-an-opera-singer cookie cake as "Merry Easter."

P.S. I'd send you some good Easter cakes, but my local grocery store's bakery is serving up domes slathered in pastel frosting with bunny ears stuck in them. They're almost bad enough to be Wrecks but certainly not good enough to be Sunday Sweets.

steller said...

I think the last egg cake looks kinda like it's from a dinosaur or something. Maybe it's to remind us of Easter from "The Land of The Lost" (Growl!)

-Matt S.

Sharon said...

Are you sure those are bunnies? I see black and white flip-flops. o.O


The last 'cake' is either an alien pod or a barbecued cabbage:
http://www.bbqsource-forums.com/invboard/index.php?showtopic=2806

Bilby P. Dalgyte said...

Ye gad what terrible colours... terrible! And for Jesus's Funeral and everything...

Jessie said...

That last "egg" cake... it's an egg alright. A DINOSAUR egg! Did they have Easter back then? They ate tbe bunnies!

Huda said...

Maybe it's me, but the one with the cross and the surreal opera singer one look like giant cookies to me, not cakes and not even CCCs. Or is it the camera angle?

Etiquette Bitch said...

i watched the opera singer clip, very cool. why am i so out of touch that i never see these things?

Sharon said...

/facepalm

omg..I didn't even see it until now. The flipflops are rabbit feet, the black patches with a dollop on them are bunny butts.

I looked at those black cupcakes and thought they were patches of bare ground like a rabbit burrow or something.

Anonymous said...

Oh My! That last one looks more like a Dinasour egg!

Tabitha (From Single to Married) said...

wow, those aren't even edible!! :)

Haiku Joy said...

Dive in CC holes,
monochromatic hop-hops!
Easter chicks can kill!

Suetois said...

I think the last one is supposed to be a house. See the icing for the edges of the roof and a door? Maybe the Easter bunny is supposed to live there. I can't explain the spring of evergreen/holly leaves though. Maybe they thought, "WTF, it's a religious holiday too," and used up some old supplies.

Alix said...

Holy Sugar Rush Batman! Are cake decorators really so swamped at Easter (or any time, really) that they can't even take the time to put on their glasses before glopping all that icing on to their "creations?"

This just reminds me of the I Love Lucy episode where she and Ethel were working in the candy factory and the conveyor belt kept wizzing by. It looks like Lucy and Ethel made these cakes.

joyce said...

sorry--we could search high and low and I am afraid we'd never spot a good Easter cake...

but, we will try...

I'd like to see an empty tomb cake, but I don't know that I'd want to eat and empty tomb cake because that would mean I was eating cake and icing that looked like rocks.

Dorci Harris said...

Who'd a thunk it that a symbol of the sacrfice of Jesus would end up on a chocolate chip cookie flanked by pastel bunnies.

I'm quite sure that's not what He had in mind.

Cally said...

Bunnies?! I thought the black and white "paws and tails" were supposed to be panda bear parts and you were going to explain that the baker was REALLY confused...

brossettelewis said...

The last one... that's a yellow house that was in the Arkansas tornado...hence the downed tree branches. Do you not read CNN?

Because of you I check the bakery every time I shop.:)

Valerie said...

OMG. Thank you so much for the daily laughs. (tears streaming down my face)

Phoo-D said...

"Brought to you by the letters W, T, and F" I totally cracked up reading that. Hilarious!

Treehouse Chef said...

The big yellow egg looks more like an easter bonnet or a Derby hat.

drgns4vr said...

I wasn't going to comment, because these cakes are just so ... weird... odd... unsettling... funny... ,
but the wv was tweepo, which kind of says it all.

Half Assed Kitchen said...

A bunch of hot messes. Wow.

Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)

DangGina said...

Well since these cakes are all truly horrible, I just HAVE to pick a favorite. I have 2 of them, actually.

First is the big yellow volcano/"egg." What's with all the big nasty vegetation strewn all around it? Makes me think of the jungle.

And my second favorite is the tough chick/dead bunnies cake. I mean, the bunny bums is hilarious in its own right, but that's not even the worst part of that cake. What the AYCH did the whole mess take place on? It's so...busy. So much going on on that cake it literally hurts my eyeballs.

This is all.

Patricia said...

I always wondered why Easter went from Christ’s resurrection to bunnies and eggs. I have thoughts on this but I won’t clutter your comment page with them. I wonder what the egg volcano will erupt with? And also: My eyes! Too much garish color! It burns!

Leslie said...

The top one reminds me of Eddie Izzard's take on Easter and the convenient placement of holidays. "Yes the brown of the chocolate bunny, the brown of the cross...which was made of wood. No! It's a fertility celebration and everybody knows bunnies are for shagging."

Number 5 reminds me vaguely of the evil rabbit from Donnie Darko. And the last one...well I'm not sure what type of egg that is but I bet Hagrid would like it. :-P

Rory said...

Yes I read "Merry Easter" too.

Haiku Joy said...

Belt an aria,
or Elvis tune? That yellow
bunny's a hound dog.

Elfie said...

I'd lost my confidence and wasn't going to bake cakes this Easter till I saw today's blog. On my way to get supplies - if they can sell this crap then the cheery little cakes my friends get are just magnificent! That green thing is actually rather disgusting or maybe just the thought of little kids with dark green................oh never mind. More black coffee please?

VeggieT said...

About that pink egg one.... it looked like they "whipped" that "topping" to death. :P

Genevieve said...

Just wanted to comment on the whole "why are bunnies and eggs for Easter?" thing. Easter was originally the spring equinox (Pagan holiday of Ostara) that the Christians took over (kind of like Christmas) in order to convert people easier. Ostara is all about re-birth and renewal of the earth, thus, eggs, and bunnies :P

twinklescrapbooks said...

The last one is freaky! I feel like grabbing my son's plastic dinosaurs and smashing the volcano with them! LOL :)
tina

Greer said...

oh! oh! I think the last one is covered in palm fronds! It's a religious thing! I get it!

-karen

Anonymous said...

oh, before anyone else spots it: a typo! i believe you want to say it "perfectLY"!

LaurenH said...

Ha ha! All the questionable symbols and such reminds me of the Jim Gaffigan bit.

"What are we going to do for Easter?"
"How about eggs?"
"But what does that have to do with Easter?"
"All right, we'll hide 'em."
"But I still don't get what that has to do with Jesus!"
"Don't worry, there's a bunny."

bettyl said...

Those are such a scream. As for the bunny and the cross, I have my own explanation:

http://bettysnzblog.blogspot.com/

Kelli said...

Okay, as a cake decorator that actually sings opera (at least that's what my degree says) I have to say that I would NEVER do that to a cake! My DH can do better than these and has no training at all! Most of us singers have more sense, and artistic talent, than to put something like that out on display.

Kamity said...

I think that first one is supposed to be a Communist Easter cake. That's the only excuse I can come up with for those hideous colors.

Oh, I also see your first commenter wasn't the first one to read "Merry Easter". You know your penmanship's bad when "Merry" and "Happy" look the same.

Skye said...

The last one looks like an old moldy sombrero... or maybe the yellow hat from Curious George? I definitely see a hat hidden in some kind of vegetation.

Anonymous said...

eegh.

but I do believe it's "be kind to your fine-feathered friends"... which would work for a chick.

Anonymous said...

Umm, read a lot of the comments about that lamb smoking cakes... May I remind people that Easter and Passover are from two separate religions and so a cake with a "Happy Easter" sign is not likely to be in celebration of Passover? Unless that was part of the Wreckiness...

Glory von Hathor said...

I can't quite explain it, but the Opera Singer Bunny Wreck just has this feel to it like a child's drawing of rudie bits they've only seen in other people's cartoons of rudie bits.

Like, Ew, and bless you for your total biological ineptitude.

Katie R said...

You mean that last one isn't a pineapple?

Nicci said...

hahahaha! Nothing says Easter like an ugly cake!

www.actionshotrevolution.blogspot.com

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

Hey, look at that...I laughed so hard at your commentary, I laid an egg.

Rachel said...

Surely that last one is in honor of some paleontologist's birthday. I'm pretty sure it's a replica of a fossilized dinosaur egg. Good golly.

melydia said...

The fifth one is so messy that it could just as easily say "merry" as "happy". In fact, at first I thought it said "Merry Easter".

Kerry said...

Since nobody else has, I guess I'll have to complete the lyric:
"...'cause that duck might be somebody's brooooooother!"

Pink said...

Why is that green CCC arranged into the shape of a four-leaf clover? *rubs her eyes* Maybe I'm seeing things.

David B said...

The-Chick-Who-Took-Down-Four-Bunny-Bullies Cake looks like a reworked shamrock cake.

A green cake in the shape of a four-leafed clover is a pretty cool idea. Reworking it into an Easter cake ... not so much.

Little Scarf Girl said...

Humpty Dumpty looks like he was supposed to be a watermelon! LOL

sendingtheclowns said...

Well, what do you EXPECT those rabbits to do BUT dive headlong down into their rabbit holes? Good grief--they obviously spotted a potential customer approaching (GASP!) and--well, would YOU wanna be seen posing on that heap of...of...???...what looks like an explosion at a confetti factory?
Or a parade float sponsored by the Green Dye Union?
As for that *decorator* who may or may not sing opera; he'd best be trotting out his hidden talents pretty soon or he'll be singing for his supper. Maybe they'll make him eat what he ruins? (He'd get aawwful sick of cake...)
>^~~^<

StuffCooksWant said...

Oh, the last one.... looks like a pre-historic dinosaur egg in the woods.

joyce said...

Would peeps in scenes be cake-wreck-good-enough for Sunday?

http://abcnews.go.com/Business/popup?id=7291566

probably not. Oh, well, I tried.

GoodDog said...

I love all the Easter posts.

Yesterday my status on facebook said I was baking bread and my Jewish friends pointed out that that was torture as Passover had begun. So like any good Catholic I spent today in Penance making chocolate covered macaroons, but it got me thinking -- are there any confused bakers out there that made Happy Passover cakes ?

Bibi said...

Nothing says the redemtion of the Lord quite like the giant cookie cakes. "So let's see, we'll start the ham, go to church and pick up a cookie as big as a pizza. VOILA, Easter!"

Trish said...

Upon enlarging the photo of the killer chick/bunny massacre cake, I noticed they used alot of the sugary shaped sprinkles. I personally LOVE those! (I call them crunchies!! Ya know...'cause they are kinda hard and crunchy?!) I would totally eat a slab of that sucker soley for the crunchies. I could even manage a piece of the dead bunny fannies with the tails that come to a point! That one is the only edible one of the bunch, though.

Anonymous said...

You are on fire today!!!!

"And finally, this Easter Egg is brought to you by the letters W, T, and F:"

LOVE it!!!!!

-Jax

jengersnap said...

No way. Are those REALLY bunny bums on that one cake?

No.
Way.

Oh, and Jurassic Park called. They want their dino egg back.

Amy said...

What's with the Haz-Mat yellow? Gag.

Super rabbit KO's Easter Bunnies..next on Fox News!

~Amy B.

Anonymous said...

Ok so I thought the bunnies on the Chicky cake were bunny paw prints not actually bunnies because a couple of them would have three ears if they are bunnies :P
BTW Love this it's my laugh everyday Thankyou

margaret said...

The right leg on that humpty cake reminds me of once when we were watching ultimate fighting and one guy broke his leg and it bent in half backwards between his knee and his ankle. Shudder.

ksaldria said...

I actually have #3 in a cupcake book but this representation looks more like a graveyard with little egg-shaped tombstones.

Anonymous said...

The last cake definitely was stolen from a xenomorph's lair.

arbed said...

Another second take on the happy/merry easter here.

My first thought on the greenery in the last pic was they were trying to imitate a crown of thorns. You know. The crown of thorns on the eggs that the easter bunny leaves for bad children.

Butterfly Petals said...

My three-year-old is looking over my should while I look at this. She pointed and said "look Mama cake." Then she must be confused because she said "Oh it's beautiful cake for a wedding!" I hope not.

Tieleen said...

I'm disappointed in you, dear Master CakeWrecker: that last one is obviously a dragon egg. The... plant?... is to symbolize its being found in the wild. No domesticated eggs for our kiddies!

Rebecca said...

Yeah, I have to agree with the other posters about the "letters W, T and F" line -- that's probably the funniest thing I've ever read on this website! Awesome! :)

Anonymous said...

The last one has HOLLY LEAVES on it! Maybe the decorator thought the box in the back said "holy" leaves?

moonfall86 said...

The third cake looked like a bunny graveyard, with pastel tombstones and black patches of newly-dug earth.

The "opera singer" bunny's chin reminds me of the episode of South Park where the boys attatch fake testicles to Butters's chin and claim he has "chinballitis."

Tanzie said...

"brought to you by the letters "W", "T" and "F"...classic!!

nikki said...

in defense of a really-cute-but-poorly-executed idea, the burrowing bunnies are from a cupcake decorating cookbook. the picture here looks NOTHING like the picture in the book. this one looks like they frosted the cupcakes with moss.

Cindy in GA said...

That last one reminds me of another wreck: "Joe Vs. the Volcano."

Jen C said...

The last one is absolutely Audrey II.

Please, whatever you do... don't feed the plants.

janet2buns said...

You know what screams Easter? Bleeding donuts! They scream pretty loud, too.

NYCGirl said...

Re: the third one: Bunnies...or headless pandas?

http://leastlikelytoblog.wordpress.com

falcon said...

I don't think that Humpty Dumpty is going through a "Punk" phase, but rather a "Lunatic" one.

Come to think of it, I saw a woman in the Haight dressed like that once...

Marita said...

Those colour choices on the cakes are just plain scary.

Choice Magazine had an interesting article about additives in cakes here in Australia:
http://www.choice.com.au/viewArticle.aspx?id=106788&catId=100228&tid=100008&p=1&title=Supermarket+cakes

Wonder how many of those additives would be avoided by not using such garish icing.

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

The leaves on the last cake look like Holly leaves with the red berries picked off.

Queen Of Relationships said...

The last cake totally looks like an "Egg Plant" hahha

Anonymous said...

The leaves/vines on the last cake look like the creepy vines in the movie "Ruins".

Alana said...

Gross!

Julianne said...

does anyone else think the first one looks like the cross is farting?

Mommy Dana said...

this is the funniest blog I think I've ever seen...i cried so hard laughing...

Katie said...

Cake Wreck 3 (the one with the bunny bums/pandas/holes) is from a book called "Hello, Cupcake!: Irresistebly Playful Creations Anyone Can Make" Howewver, in the naming of the book, they made one mistake: not everyone apparently can make them. I think plastic eggs and chicks are part of the problem.

Meg said...

Sheesh...I'm sorry but cookie "cakes" are just wrong. They might (might!) even be worse than cupcake cakes. At least with CCC's you actually get CAKE underneath it all!! Not only are they ugly but for all those calories you don't get any cake! Ugly, identity challenged, non-cake cookies... so VERY wrong...

Jenn said...

The scary thing was that the punk Humpty Dumpty came in many colors... the pink caught my eye first, but I do remember Yellow and Orange...

I'm just plain tickled pink (haha) that one of my cakes got picked! :)

PALS said...

We don't eat cakes on Easter Sunday. Im a christian that don't like to celebrate easter by having fun.

Reviews

sendingtheclowns said...

"Julianne said...
does anyone else think the first one looks like the cross is farting?"
* * * * * * *
Heh heh...yeah, it does sort of! But in cartoons they usually show "stinky" as ~~~wavy~~~ vertical lines hovering over.
I was thinking that maybe a couple of chickens had tried to dive into a (oh-so-popular) rabbit hole, but didn't quite make it.
=^??^=

Word of the minute: "tarcali."
"I wouldn't dare walk through a tarcali alone these days."

Vickie said...

You, my friend, take humor to a new level. No matter what kind of day I'm having, I can stop in and laugh so hard I hurt. In a world where there is so much sorrow, we need more people like you. The cakes are awful, but you rock!!!

Elena said...

Aggh, I missed the easter posts while in Holland!
I'll have to send some posthumous pics of the creepy bunny breads for next year.

momofthree said...

I think the last one is supposed to be Jesus's tomb. It appears to have the palm fronds around it, which are symbolic for Easter.

Melissa (& Billy) said...

Whoa. 0_o It just got worse and worse the more I scrolled down the page!

Anonymous said...

Hasn't anyone seen the first "Alien" movie? That last one is definitely an Alien pod just waiting to pop open and suck your face! I wouldn't dare go near it with a knife!

Cawmaster said...

I would make the whippedtopping/humptydumpty cake just for the sheer goofiness that it conveys. At least it's funny looking, but in a cute way.

Liza said...

"And finally, this Easter Egg is brought to you by the letters W, T, and F"

Thanks, I just spit soda all over my desk and my co-workers are looking at me like I am a lunatic. Note to self: do NOT read Cake Wrecks at work anymore, LOL

DeeNadj said...

The third rabbit looks like he has breasts. With a "leaking" issue.

Tinaletay said...

Omg! I love you guys!!!:D I love Love LOVE that you say (exactly) what we are all thinking! Thank you! Love the site! Very VERY clever and HILARIOUS!!!;)

Sarah said...

I read this blog about a few months ago and I'm listening to NPR and they're interviewing the blogger of "Cake Wrecks"! Needless to say I was very excited and logged on and viewed almost all of the wrecked cake pictures. These pictures are just a huge mass of disaster! Couldn't stop laughing.

Sarah

Anonymous said...

I read it as Merry Easter too. I had to go back and squint at it a bit after reading your post.

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