Monday, February 28, 2011

Initial Discomfort

Monday, February 28, 2011

Monograms can add that perfect crowning touch of elegance to your wedding cake.


Or, they can look like this:

Proof that sometimes it's better to quit before letting your five-year-old write on the cake.


Still, it could be worse.

The monogram could match the rest of the cake:

Hey, it's not easy to make tinfoil look this good.


If you do find a mistake in your cake's monogram, don't panic. There are plenty of seamless ways for your baker to fix the error.

This isn't one of them.


Now, I'm all for sharing new words, broadening folks' horizons, furthering education, etc, but if you have to explain to the baker of your wedding cake what a monogram is - a "T, J, and H" put together, for example - then maybe, just maybe, a few alarm bells should go off.


Or I suppose you could just take your chances.


After all, what could go wrong?


Heh.


Aheh.


Heh.


At least the quotes add a little something "extra."


Thanks to today's wedding wreckporters Anony M., Hilary R., Cyndi P., & Cyndee M., who think all bakers should be required to ask, "Can I quote you on that?"
Jules AF said...

I read monogram as mammogram. That created some confusion as I started reading this post....

Ferralyn said...

"THC" indeed. You'd have to be high to want to eat that cake.

VeggieT said...

wow, do my eyes deceive me? is that the first "Literal Lol" on a tiered wedding cake? o_0

Stephanie said...

"What could go wrong?"
Exhibit A: this blog

Claire said...

Quotation marks on a WEDDING CAKE!? Adios, last remaining shreds of hope for humanity...

Ms. Blasé said...

All of these cake wreckers should've stopped while they were ahead and left the darn cakes alone!!!

Sandy C also in SoFla said...

The first one would be nice... without the monogram.

But the second is an all over mess. Looks like either it was decorated during an earthquake, or the wreckorator was quivering in fear because of taking on a cake she/he couldn'd handle.

Anne said...

maybe the first cake is for Canadian rapper K-os, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K-os

Joanna said...

I feel especially bad for the bride who ordered the last cake because of the vomit-inducing lime-green-colored icing used to inscribe that monstrous misunderstanding of a monogram.

Colleen said...

Horrible. Hilariously horrible but still horrible. And the worst part is the cakes are pretty except for the letters on them.

www.cyberrbluefoods.wordpress.com

Loo-E Loo-I said...

LOL Boob Nazi! "Initial Discomfort" + mammogram...*chuckle*

Oh. Dear. Here's a lesson for all...if you have initials/monograms that infer something else - for Pete's sake - don't put it on the cake!

wv: caning: These wreckerators deserve a good caning!

Anonymous said...

Ahehe

Peachy said...

Had to use my wv for today's post: Recdy. I'm ready to recdy cake now.

Annette said...

@Joanna - I know a bride who chose that exact same colour green for her bridesmaids dresses. I swear it was so she'd look better in comparison.

@Boob Nazi - I too read it as mammogram the first time, I guess the "discomfort" already had me thinking in that direction. And thankfully I don't think we've seen any mammogram cakes.

Heather J. said...

My brother's fiancee saw a cake topper with a monogram that said FML. Seriously, so now I will probably spend the rest of my day looking for it instead of doing my homework.

Heather J.

msyendor said...

Well, it's said that one little flaw amidst such perfection can give character ... what that character is, though ...

wv: Gailyg -- some unknown alphabet and/or speech symbols as demonstrated in these wrecks

Shannon said...

@ Joanna and Annette The color was WAY wrong!!! That was my sister's wedding and trust me our dresses were not that color!!!:):):) It was a disaster but sooo funny now:)

Donna said...

Ah, these wedding posts make me once again oh so happy to be past the wedding stage because as trying as some days could be, they aren't near as trying as facing these cakes!

Anonymous said...

wow that's a fail for those cake people! who puts quotation marks on a wedding cake!! my 4 year old looked at it said, "mom thats wrong" :-)

Anonymous said...

Maybe the first cake is in Afrikaans, in which "kos" means "food" and they expected the guests to be really stupid or had just come from eating the THC cake. It looked kind of nice, otherwise, but the blue roses are kind of freaky, well, blue food in general. Blue roses always remind me of "The Glass Menagerie" by Tennessee Williams.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure that I understand what's awful about the B cake. Will someone share insight?

cakeburnette said...

I'm with Anonymous @ 12:53pm. I even zoomed in and couldn't find anything glaringly wrong, either. Weird looking monogram, but not horrible.

Knit Wit said...

When will we learn? Letters of any sort are trouble! Monograms on wedding cakes? For the love of fondant, why???? I would imagine all the attendees know who's getting married. Why do we need to see their initials?

Anonymous said...

I think the "B" cake has a piece of fondant just stuck on the side of the cake to cover up a mistake. I missed it at first too.

SilverPixieFly said...

It is sad that the cakes can be made so perfectly until the letters were added.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Anon. I don't see what's wrong with the "B" cake either ... I'm guessing it's an obvious correction that will make me feel like an idiot when I'm told.

TisforTonya said...

another "wow" moment on CW... will it never "end"?

Chani said...

@ cakeburnette and Anonymous- It's just obvious that the "B" cake has an edible icing sheet on top, probably covering a past mistake. It's not horrible and at least they fixed the issue.

The lime green is just tragic.

Chani said...

... p.s.
Did they leave the THC cake out on FOIL!?! OMG!

wv: dismor
Cakes like the second one are dismor tragic.

Tad Callin said...

nothing wrong with the "B" cake... except that they did the design on a separate sheet of fondant and then stuck it on the side of the cake. and the 'eye of sauron' corrective oval isn't even symmetrical. someone made a booboo and instead of re-doing it, they quick-fixed it. lazy.

and my wv is vasold: the fondant used on the "B" correction vasold-er than the fondant on the layers.

Annette said...

@Shannon - different wedding entirely! I know this cake wasn't at that wedding, but the bridesmaids dresses were a horrible kind of electric lime/snot green. I had to take pictures just to prove that someone could be that cruel to their bridesmaids.

As for the "B" cake, I think the problem is that it's an obvious patch job put on over the cake.

@Heather - love the FML monogram. I think we should be listing monograms that shouldn't be on cakes.
- PFO
- KMN
...others?

Anonymous said...

I think the "B" cake's issue is the 'band-aid' of fondant used to cover the assumed previous attempt. :P

Denise :) said...

Yeah, but I'm sure *all* of these cakes tasted really REALLY good, right? Right?!?! LOL! :)

Anonymous said...

I think that the problem with the B cake is that they made an error, and just pasted over it with another piece of fondant. I can't imagine they would have done that unless there was a mistake underneath that, or under neat that, depending on who you ask.
JMo

Anonymous said...

I think the "B" is on a fondant patch or band-aid stuck to the side of the cake.

Anonymous said...

To Tad @ 1:32... Eye of Sauron!!!! Buwhahahahahaha!!

WV: tonog. There are a tonog cake wrecks out there, huh!?!

Lizzie

Laura said...

I love this website--it makes me laugh every day. And this post makes me so happy that our wedding cake was lovely. Peach icing roses, no initials, and no findant patchwork!

Unknown said...

the flowers on the second cake look like sliced bananas

NiteNurse said...

Well, knowing that in classic monograms the first and middle initials go to the sides and the last initial is larger and in the middle, I would not advise monograms on cakes for the following brides:
Sara Teasdale Otterly
Belva Gennette Insteed
Paula Gaily Undine
Teresa Tennyson Inge
Donna Garrison Olsen
Etc.

At the hospital we are frequently called upon to vote on name choices for newborns and the first thing we tell people is to check the initials in standard order and monogram order to see if they spell anything unfortunate. One of my colleagues saved a little guy from being saddled with the initials P.I.G.!

Anonymous said...

@Heather - love the FML monogram. I think we should be listing monograms that shouldn't be on cakes.
- PFO
- KMN
...others?

Um, I don't get it? What does FML stand for in your mind?

Anonymous said...

For the love of God, would someone please teach these wreckreators to PUT THE ICING BAG DOWN ALREADY!!!

wv: derlyin - "derlyin when they said they could make a cake"

Angela said...

I'm mysteriously got the munchies after seeing that second cake....

Anonymous said...

Tad at 1:32...

eye of sauron! Buwahahahahahaha!

Nice one.

Lizzie

wv: inewinge - inewinge with a sense of style would never put a monogram on a wedding cake!

KatzenMama said...

I think the wreckorator indulged in a bit too much of the THC before adding the monogram to the cake.

Terrs said...

i love that the last one doesn't even use a writing tip to make the monogram..... so it was doomed even if the wreckorator managed to get the monogram correct lol

Nikki via The Scarlett Rose Garden said...

Blue roses, icing or silk, are just gross- period.

Did they use guacamole for icing on the last cake? Ew.

Anonymous said...

wv: reched. 'Nuff said.

Wolverine Girl said...

I don't get the whole monogram thing. I'm guessing it's just the initials of one person, rather than the bride and groom together, because otherwise three initials is just kind of disturbing. But why only one person anyway? I'm assuming it's the bride. Does the poor groom get any say at all?

Anonymous said...

The second one, THC - just flat out reminded me of a tombstone... I didn't even notice the tin foil!

Bree said...

The cakes would have actually been very decent if not for those wonky monograms!

Anonymous said...

Maybe the first cake was supposed to read SOS! As in save me from this inept baker! The rest of number one was kind of pretty!

Heidi D said...

Ha! I thought I read mammogram!! I need a nap....boobs.

Julie said...

KOS = Kill On Sight

... wonder if that is what the bride wanted to do to the person that made her cake.

kayk said...

@Wolverine Girl -- Traditionally, the "married" monogram is the bride's first name initial, then the married surname large in the middle, then the groom's first name initial. So Mr. and Mrs. Sam and Edna Crumbcatcher's monogram on linens etc. would be E C S. Anyone's guess what to do when the bridge keeps her nasme, uses a midddle name, etc.

Anonymous said...

"Hey, it's not easy to make tinfoil look this good."

See, I don't drink coffee so I don't have the problem of spitting it onto my screen. I do, however, have a bladder and this is not the first time you've made me laugh so hard I've wet my pants. Srsly, what's a girl to do- sit on the "throne" with her laptop to read this blog? LMAO

-Barbara Anne

Tricia L said...

The first cake was decorated by a very talented artist. Unfortunately, he/she did not lock up the piping bags before leaving the kid who washes the pans in charge of handing over this cake when the family came by to pick it up.

Anonymous said...

"Um, I don't get it? What does FML stand for in your mind?"

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fml

Anonymous said...

Forbidden monograms:
STD (or STI, if you prefer)

Craig said...

The only thing that makes less sense on a wedding cake than a monogram is full names and the date. That could be done as a service to people who aren't sure they're at the right reception, but 'not seeing anyone you know' ought to be a sufficient clue.

#1 Given the subtle spacing variation (K OS), it appears that the wreckerator took advantage of the monogram to make an editorial comment. Perhaps there was a dispute about the bill?

#2 The wreckerator finally got tired of being asked about the 'secret ingredient'.

Is that an actual sash? The third tier down looks like that is where the frosting ran out.

#3 Don't you just love subtlety? Don't you just love how this 'B' cake almost turned into an inverse EPCOT? (What would Spaceship Earth look like turned inside out?)

#4 Now *those* are daisies! None of this 'lotus flower' stuff this time. Congrats, "T", "J" and "H". Do the quotes mean the bride and groom were using assumed initials?

Whenever the question, 'what could go wrong?' is uttered, life speedily supplies an answer.

Arlene said...

Lol if any one of these brides paid for those cakes.. shame on them. Horrid way to ruin what looked to be a beautiful cake in that first pic. Sheesh. Evil wreckerators strike again.

Vivienne said...

Hey this is fun! There's always a room for mistakes yeah.

Veit schenk said...

this funny but so cutie! A black swan then the cake is white... a total wrecker indeed

Andrew Withers said...

is this for real thing? What could have go wrong with those cakes?

Joan of Erk said...

Heh... 'kos' is Afrikaans for 'food'. Awesome to have food that's labelled :)

Mike said...

Is that wedding cake for laughs? I had fun looking at those cakes

snuzzle said...

Those are definitely banana slice flowers on cake #2.

Rebecca said...

Haha. THC.

Anne said...

That first one is just a crime against cake.

Although bluey-grey is not a good colour for roses. Why?! Other than that, they're very pretty.

2. Awful doesn't even start to describe it...icing's all cracked, and it looks like it was left in a corner for a month. The ..uh.. "monogram" is an improvement on the rest of it..

3. Think my only comment is "meh"!

4. There are no words.

Except...reckon the wreckerator was checking to see if polygamous marriages were allowed in their region?

WV. cochieve: The moment when these wreckerators achieved a complete ****-up!

FromTheHeartsOf said...

Personally I hate monograms on a cake. We get it, you are taking his last name. You're getting married, we understand that's usually how it works!

Unknown said...

That first cake...what kind of blue IS that?

Assuming that most cake's colors are in keeping with the whole color scheme of the wedding, can we then assume the bridesmaids in that wedding were wearing denim dresses - or mechanic coveralls? I can't imagine what you mix to get that awful color. If depression had a color, that would be it.

Xem Phim Online said...

lol, ha ha ha

Jay said...

I feel so sad for that K OS cake. Like getting cut from the team on the last tryout.

wv: messe. Well, there you go.

Len said...

@snuzzle totally agree! I checked on the comments only to see if anyone else saw the same. :D

A Girl In Her Kitchen said...

Awe, that first one could have been stunning.

Oh, well.

http://agilrinherkitchen.blogspot.com

Eliz Rug said...

Yep, I agree with Ferralyn. And using the THC will also make your cake appear on this blog...

ELiz

Ellen said...

Oy.

And to all who mentioned mammograms -- please don't give the wreckorators any ideas! We've seen boob cakes, we've seen flattened cakes, do we really want to see the two combined?

Dusty said...

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I blame Wilton (cake decorating supply company) for most of these mistakes. They churn out so called cake decorators in a 4 lesson course and tell them they're great just to get them to buy more stuff. Then, these stay at home moms who paid 25 bucks for a class think they're certified professionals. When, in reality, they churn out crap like this in most cases. It's sad, really.
FYI, I am a professional cake artist, and no, I did not learn though Wilton, but I did teach the classes.