Wednesday, July 20, 2011

They're Gonna Need 'Em

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Ask where the second "e" went all you want; *I* want to know what's in that icing. [shudder]


Sorry, Ash, you only get one.


Aw, this is my fav "favewell" cake ever. It's the bes!


I'm a little unclear on the message here. Is it:

"Best wishes! Here's a pile of crap! With plastic! And curly ribbon!"

Yes? No? Am I close?


Ok, so in the Ghostbusters video game (oh, c'mon, you knew I was a nerd) there's this cursed clock that claims to show the exact time of death for anyone who looks at it. Creepy, right?

Well, guess what came to mind when I saw this cake?

You think this Wreckerator knows something about Beck Y's future - say, around 10 PM - that we don't? I mean, she filled in everything else from "play with gran kids" to "gardaning," so that lone blank spot is looking pretty dang ominous, if you ask me.

In fact, maybe the baker should just get right to the point:


Or:

Buuuuuh...

Buhbye.

Thanks to W.C., Ashley B., April C., Ginny B., Heather J., Betsy U., & Jennifer H. for all the fell wishes.
SuBee said...

Beck y might want to skip "TV' and forego sleepin and rest considering what's on her schedule.

favewell,
Susan

Anonymous said...

The combination of beautiful handwriting and terrible spelling is making dents in my forehead.

*dent-dent-dent-dent*

The Pink Drink Ladies said...

That was my question too. Exactly WHAT is in the icing on that first cake.

Also, is it me or are they making more and more cakes that resemble poop?

Jackie

Kayto said...

That last cake feels like it's missing something. Like a period, to emphasize the strong feelings of whomever ordered the cake.

Maybe we'll give them a bye this time.

Haiku Joy said...

Oily icing sheen
says "Call the Poison Hotline.
Ipecac chaser."

Naomi said...

"Ask where the second "e" went all you want; *I* want to know what's in that icing. [shudder]"

I'm thinking either pecans or cockroaches.

Sorry, I mean pecan's or cockroach's.

bassgirl said...

Ants in the first cake? Nah, caraway seeds. It's a recipe from the old country

Rev. Allyson said...

'Bes' is the name of a rather scary Egyptian deity. He looks terrifying, but is actually a household protector. But when I read the cake, I had the image of a little girl having her mother put a statue of Bes (all hairy and frightening looking, with a big... um... stick...), and the little girl freaking out. Oh good gawd NOT BES!!!

Kristen but my family call me Petal said...

I'm thinking the first cake is nuts! I mean nuts in the icing as well as ... well you get it.

wv Gazux - "Gazux Scooby!" An exclaimation from Shaggy when he saw these cakes!

Chrisitneb said...

I've been on Harry Potter overload, so the clock cake reminds be of Mrs. Weasley's family clock, only not as awesome and with terrible spelling.

Wasp said...

The third one might have been passable. If it weren't for the misspellings.

Anonymous said...

The first cake is an Italian Cream cake with pecans in the cream cheese icing.

Amy'sMom said...

Re: Best Wish, Ashley
If you think about it, there can only be one *best* wish.
This cake is correct and don't we all feel foolish.

Anonymous said...

That one looks like a ghetto Weasley Clock.

-Blue

Sharyn said...

#1: It's wild rice in the frosting. That's where they get the expression "The ricing on the cake." You know. "Bob thought getting ANY dessert was a treat, but getting one with crunchy frosting? Well, that was the ricing on the cake." (My friend Emily Litella explained it to me...)

#3: "Favewell Beswishes" sound like some sort of individually wrapped snack I'd put in my kid's lunch. ("No lunch is complete without Favewell Beswishes!")

#5: I had the same thought as you -- Something SO horrible is going to happen to Beck Y at 10:00 they can't even write it on the cake. (Or maybe the baker just couldn't spell "exsanguination?")

WV: munbur -- Becky learned that at 10:00 her munbur was up.

Risti said...

The only thing missing from that clock cake is unnecessary quotation marks around 'sleepin'.

Anonymous said...

What the...

Anonymous said...

I think someone should check on grandma Beck Y's medications if she's resting or unconscious at 2, 7 and 11. (As well as being sedentary at 4 and 9)!

elissa said...

That Favewell cake looks delicious, though. I mean, who can go wrong with strawberries and chocolate? Now I'm hungry...

Must resist bakery. Must resist bakery....

SuBee said...

Considering what's on her schedule, perhaps Beck y should forego sleepin' and rest. Goodness knows, there'll be enough time for rest at ten o'clock.

Cranky Amy said...

I just want to know why is sucks to be Betsy. Hey, Betsy, what the heck happened?!?!?!?

Mary Connealy said...

I actually found the football/cupcake cake encouraging. I mean... "AAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! you kids quit playing with that ball before you...... AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!! my CUPCAKES!!!!"

This is what's known as making lemonade out of lemons in this life. A great lesson for us all. This is a woman I'd like to meet.

It can't have been PLANNED this way.

Vanessa said...

I'm pretty sure the clock cake is a take on Mrs. Weasley's grandfather clock from Harry Potter that has a hand for each family member so she knows where they are/what they were doing. Unfortunately, this one doesn't have a time designated for 'mortal peril'. I'm really thinking it should...

Craig said...

#1 I'm sure it is something perfectly innocuous. Yeah, that's it. The second 'e' is in the part that some trusting / daring soul has already consumed.

#2 Given the perfunctory look of the whole thing, I'd say, 'rush job'.

#3 Give the wreckerator a break -- they ran out of 't'.

#4 Your words say 'best wishes', but your cupcakes say something else.

#5 That's a most peculiar schedule 'Beck Y' has, with 'gardaning' at noon and midnight. The poor dear can only do her 'sleepin' for one hour, at 11. What's a 'nop'?

#6 Ah, Bitsy. What does the giver of the cookie have in store for you?

#7 I like how a small piece of this was eaten (presumably) and the cover carefully replaced. I don't think I'd be eating something that said simply, 'bye'.

Haiku Joy said...

When a cake says "Bye,"
You need to consider that
One slice is poison.

Kathleen said...

I think cake number two is just missing some punctuation (aren't we all?) " Best Wish? Ashley!"

The Bionic Belly said...

With the color of the icing used for the writing, I'm willing to bet that's lavender flowers in the first one. Lavender buttercream is actually really tasty, but that's not how you make it.

Or, you know, ants. It could be ants.

Shannan said...

The roses on the 'sucks to be you' cake appear to be a bit phallic in shape...just sayin.

ALyssa said...

I think the clock cake might be refering to Mrs. Weasely's clock from Harry Potter that shows her what her family is doing.

zoomom said...

What's in the icing? It's the mutilated remains of the missing "e".

mel said...

@Sharyn 10:29 -- ricing on the cake -- LOL! Hat's off!

Little know fact: this kind of cake is used as a wedding cake in excruciatingly small rural communities in obscure parts of the country. Instead of throwing the rice at the couple as they leave (outlawed by city ordinance as a result of a rather unfortunate incident involving a goose), the rice is thrown beforehand into the frosting! (White rice for the previously unbed, wild rice for, well, the others....) I think I saw this on the National Geographic Channel, so it may be true.

wv-teddlend: a town that can't be shut down, as in "Chicago, Chicago, that teddlend town...."

sundevils1 said...

The last cake (and caption) reminded me of the SNL skit with David Spade and Helen Hunt who were nasty flight attendants that kept saying "Buh-bye".

Labrys said...

I think it is lavender flowers in the first cake. Yeah, doin' it 'rong.

Anonymous said...

Epcot! Beck Y goes to Epcot at 10!!!

Karen said...

I think the clock cake looks like Epcot...

Tracy said...

this whole post just made me remember John Green's nerdfighter salutation
"Best Wishes!"

:)

No Cake Fo' You!!! said...

July 20, 2011 9:57 AM
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The first cake is an Italian Cream cake with pecans in the cream cheese icing.

_____________________________________

Ummmmm did you make it personally??? I'm just sayin'.... LOL

SabrinaGimm said...

And at 10:00, they found Beck Y lying there, an uneaten spoonful of cookie cake in her hand.

Roses said...

I was pretty sure at 7pm, there was "no P".

Beck Y best plan her bathroom break around that.

Megan said...

I thought that the first one was the result of not waiting for the cake to cool before frosting it (when you end up with chunks of cake in the frosting).

magrathea said...

10 PM is clearly reserved for some "private time". In the bedroom. If you know what I mean. *wink wink nudge nudge*

Herouth said...

@Anonymous Dent-dent-dent:

I think this conundrum will not last long, as cursive writing lessons are being cancelled in the USA. So you'll get ugly, misspelled cakes. Problem solved.

And a bonus: lots of more Cake Wrecks posts in years to come, showing us awkwardly written messages.

WV: nockt - these cakes nockt my socks off.

M said...

The first one looks like it was frosted with skins-on mashed potatoes.

Anonymous said...

When the little hand is pointing right at the 3, the big hand has to be pointing at the 12, NOT the 6. I mean, srsly, dont thei no nothin bout cloc kakes!

Craig said...

I thought #1 might have something to do with the recent spate of cicada stories in the news (even heard and almost saw one here today in sunny SoCal).

"We use only the finest cicadas, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest-quality spring water, lightly killed, and then dropped one by one into a vat of frosting."

Or that pecan thing. I like that theory better -- don't know how one would go about proving it, but it's easier on the stomach.

Sara said...

Cake #2 makes me want to say everything like Hiro Nakamura. Favewell Peter Petrelli.


VW Furenta: "careful of the furenta next cake. Could cause a hairball."

Muria said...

Couldn't help but think Beck Y is doing something unmentionable at 10pm, right before going to sleep. Wouldn't want to scare the gran kids by mentioning that old people still have S-E-X....

I think the font on the Favewell cake is really cool, apart from the "r". Well, and maybe the "t", but I haven't seen that one yet. :P

Joanna Spotts said...

Maybe the "football" cake is for fans of the Detroit Lions...

Anonymous said...

#1 is the anti King cake
no color, no pizzaz, it's not fried and there's no plastic baby inside

-Barbara Anne

Auntie J said...

Hah! The "Sucks to be you" one reminds me of the note which accompanied the flowers from my office, when I was recovering from surgery. My office manager asked the boss what sort of note he wanted on the flowers, and, without skipping a beat, he said, "Quit goofing off and get back to work!" And that's what the card said.... I thought it was hilarious, because it was so classically my boss.

WV: scrumsay (skrum-sæ) n. Heated interjections shouted in the middle of a rugby scrum.

Arlene said...

Man I miss the ninja donut.. these cakes are just scary. Especially that first one. Are there nuts in that frosting or dead ants? Either way scary stuff lol. I liked the writing on the cake with the strawberries on it too bad they can't spell too well..can't have everything I guess.

Noni Mausa said...

I really like the Favewell cake handwriting, and how it's sort of embedded in the surrounding icing. (How'd she do dat?) My happy eyes keep going back to it.

Anonymous said...

I see poor Beck Y is scheduled to 'nop' - sounds unpleasant, hope it's not painful

Durable Goods said...

I kinda like how "whimsically" the final favewell is written on #7...

GennyDiggory said...

Was that...a quote from Hocus Pocus? Aside from Suzie Q THE BEST made for TV Disney movie ever. (oh, Under Wraps is way up there too.) Jen, I love you more every. day.
Buh bye.

JessicaMc said...

I happened to see part of an episode of a certain NJ cake show about a guy & his famiglia, and he was putting bugs in the icing for some crazy entomology thing, and it looked exactly like the first cake!

More importantly, on the first cake, is that an apostrophe in "Wish's" ??? Sure looks like a bit of icing there, but maybe it's a bug. I mean, pecan.

Nightfalltwen said...

It's probably lavender flowers in that first cake.

Lorie said...

I'm pretty sure that first cake is a prune cake, with prunes in the frosting. And they taste as nasty as they look...

M. Muenich said...

I thought it was pretty clear that something was going on at 10pm that BeckY may not want on her cake.
Eh, married folks? Eh?

Meghan Smith said...

I'm not sure that the "favewell" cake isn't from the same bakery as the "it a gril" cake.

wv. Muzzlets -- little puppies that are not magical. Like muggles for humans.

Anonymous said...

Was I the only one who noticed the Nacho Libre reference?