Monday, July 4, 2011

Go Fourth and Celebrate!

Monday, July 4, 2011

Though we usually just refer to today as the 4th of July, we here in the U.S. are celebrating something far greater than just a date on the calendar:

Our "Indenpdants."


Hm. I guess that's why most bakers stick to "Happy Fourth," huh? Less to mess up that way.

*headdesk*

You know, the fact that someone had to print that flag out, notice the red ink was gone, and yet choose to use it anyway is why I love this country. It just goes to show that through guts, ingenuity, and perseverance of spirit... I will never be out of a job.


Here's one that serves as a reminder of the date, minus any emotional bossing around:

Happy or not, here it comes!!

(And who wants to bet the other side just says, "July"?)


Same idea, even poorer execution:

Well, that's a first.


And when they're not wrecking cakes, some bakers take turns making other "collssal" mistakes:

Given the context, I have to assume that "collssal" = "patriotic skid marks."


And finally, while I'm not sure this Marines cake was made specifically for today, I think it serves as an excellent reminder of what we in this country value above all else:

Sneaking the first piece before the rest of the family comes in.


Thanks to Lauren O., Laura S., Elizabeth K., Michele G., Susan C., & Amy H., who know that sometimes you just have to even out that side a few more bites.
Fluffy Cow said...

Dibs on the second piece!

Anyone know what shape that third "cake" is?? I'm baffled.

Muria said...

"Simper Fi"?!?!?! And I've never seen a flag with flag pole rings on the stripe side of the US Flag. I think on holidays you should make the last cake a sweet (like you did for the one Canada Day), so people aren't going around muttering things like, "SIMPER FI????"

My son's looking for a job. Maybe I should tell him to apply as a cake decorator. Clearly, there's job security there.

LunamothMama said...

Happy Indenpdants Day!!


Wv:hytea - I made a cake for hytea this 4th Jluy... wait, what do you mean I drew the flag wrong?

Tricia L said...

On the last one, they actually got the right number of stripes in the flag. Okay, everything else is screwed up, but I've seen so many cakes with 9, 10, 11, 12, 14 or 15 stripes that I've got to say "Well done, wreckerator!"

Shoe said...

I don't know how many times I've looked at this site and assured myself that some of these decorators must MUST be new to the english language. Surely this must be their second language......surely.....

Judy C said...

You can't know how much I enjoy your blog. A good laugh or a really beautiful cake. Either one is great.

Karyn said...

"Fourth" would be the canadian spelling :)

Anonymous said...

I took like a minute to see why the 2nd cake was a wreck.."but, it is spelled correctly!"

Yes, i am tired, why'd you ask?

Great selection of cakes, if the cake isn't correct at least the laugh will be there for the party!

And j et j, beware, i think the sunday sweets complainers might show up today instead. (Let's hope i'm wrong!!)

Haiku Joy said...

The upside-down flag
signals distress. But reversed?
Cake, meet Army Sleeve.

Haiku Joy said...

Jluy knows his dream:
to meet his long-lost twin sis,
sweet Fourth of Julie.

Sharyn said...

Wait. These cakes aren't "wrecks."

Every year on Indenpdants Day we gather around our blue and yellow flag cake with our friend Jluy -- we make him a cake, too, in case we run out of collssal cookies -- and simper faithfully.

Doesn't everybody?

mel said...

Cakes obvioulsy made by still disgruntled British bakers...

wv-jugati: exclamatory utterance; usually said with astonishment, as in "Those are 4th of July cakes? Jugati be kidding!"

Holly said...

That last cake takes me back to Kindergarden when I used to draw the stars in the wrong corner. Of course, buy first grade I had it all straitened out:) I wonder what his/her excuse is...
Thanks for doing such an excellent job with the blog!

Unknown said...

I'll bet the last cake is partially the result of somebody using spellcheck. They searched for the words individually instead of as a phrase. "Now showing results for semper. Did you mean simper?" I shudder to think what would have happened if they had attempted "fidelis."

Anonymous @ 10:26-- Same here. And it would have been so easy to lay a parchment paper mask over the blue field and white stripes, and airbrush or sugar-sprinkle the mistake away.

Anonymous said...

Is "simper fi" part of the "don't ask, don't tell" policy?

Diane1611 said...

@Fluffy Cow - I think that cake is supposed to be a basketball.

As for the rest of those cakes - yikes! The last one had to be made by someone who wasn't born in this country.

Anonymous said...

Wow. I sure wouldn't want to be in the vicinity when Sarge sees that last cake.

Happy Indenpdants Day! Or Happy Forth of Jluy!!!

Sharon

Jillian said...

That last cake is terrible! I think a Marine would be offended by that one. Luckily I can laugh at the spelling and distress flag. ;)

Kimberly Chapman said...

I think patriotic skid marks are what you leave in your happy indenpdants while simpering around when love of country overrides control of bodily functions.

Squirrel said...

I'm thinking those "patriotic skid marks" are actually representative of Aquafresh toothpaste and the wreckerator was reminding people to brush their teeth after eating such a "collssal" cookie...the plastic rings just cinch it for me, anyone else remember when going to the dentist being able to pick out a toy from a treasure chest after their visit?

Amalia said...

May the Fourth be with you all.

Anonymous said...

SO proud to be an American today. *facepalm*

Thank goodness my patriotism runs deeper than flour, eggs and sugar!

-Barbara Anne

INOL said...

umm Simper Fi? Way to go to honor the USMC by mis-spelling Semper Fi.. Fail.

Danielle said...

Patriotic skid marks! *dies laughing*

furpurrson said...

If there's one thing U.S. Marines don't do, it's simper.

Aliza said...

OK, folks. The American flag is really rather simple to create. The colour scheme is simple. The date is simple. Argh! Why, then is it so hard to get it right????

And yes, I'm aware that most of these people have minimal education (here, folks, is a reason to finish school) and/or English is their second or third language... but (a) to become a Canadian citizen, it's pretty rigorous questionnaire that has to be answered (most born-citizens would not pass!), so don't you have the same thing there, and (b) I'm a "foreigner" but heck, I can even identify most of the First Wives, let alone US states, Presidents, etc. Or the flag. But then again, I'm Canadian :)

Regardless of the state of the wreckage, Happy 4th of July (jluy?) to all celebrating Independence (indenpdants?) day! May the cakes taste better than they look :)

WV "nonsnenc". How a wreckerator would spell nonsense.

Donna M. said...

The first one made me think of Happy In Depends Pants Day, the day we celebrate incontinence (or was that in continents?).

That last one, I'm still shaking my head on that. I just hope the baker was foreign, that would be the only excuse for putting the pole on the wrong side of the flag.

Anonymous said...

I had to go look up a picture of the MARPAT utility uniform to see if it has a reversed flag on it. It doesn't. Now I'm even more confused by the last cake.

Mary said...

Not to mentio it should actually be "Semper Fi"

Lucy said...

These are great!!

Jabby said...

Jluy is a awesome name! I'm saving that to name my first born child. Or my goldfish.

Becky said...

Trying to picture a marine simpering makes the last cake sooo much more enjoyable.
But how did they mess up the flag so badly and manage the right number of stripes? You know there's 13 stripes but you can't remember what corner the stars are in?!

Anonymous said...

My deepest simper fi to the people who ordered these cakes.

Michelle said...

I love the "emotional bossing around" comment--hilarious!

Herouth said...

Re: patriotic skid marks
I actually thought those were patriotic synchronized-dancing slugs.

Re: Yellow and blue USA flag
I blame Canada.

Yes! With Canada Day preceding the Fourth of July by only a few days, all the red ink is spent and wreckerators just can't replenish it in time.

Anonymous said...

Woooooooow, bakers, woooooow. By the way Jen when you're looking for some Sunday Sweets check out Lori Smith's cakes on facebook.

B. Maggie said...

We line in a special country where even the dyslexic can fine employment. Now, if we could just find the guidance counselor who tells them cake decoration is their dream job.....

KD Jewelry said...

OH MY GOSH! LOLOL I almost missed my OWN fireworks "celebrashun" reading your blog!!

Letitia said...

Oh dear. Depends undergarments, Simper Fi, Jluy....

Anonymous said...

Oh that simper fi was just so wrong...I hope no REAL Marines saw that one

Arlene said...

Wow someone really had to be hungry on that last cake lol. I guess they really didn't take time to notice that the flag has no red stripes on it that or they hoped no one would notice it is yellow..wreckerators what will they wreck next??

revRach said...

Being a Brit it took a while to work out the simper fi reference and for a horrible moment I thought it was an 'in sympathy' cake spelled phonetically by someone who can't pronounce their 'ths'! Thankfully not such a jaw droppingly insensitive wreck! Great post though, I'm so impressed with how you keep such a consistently high laughter rating!

Jehn said...

I just saw cake wrecks in the Graham Norton Show on BBC America!!! Congrats!!!! :)

`Jehn J from TX

Gary said...

The cake with the "collssal" red, white, and blue slugs on it must come from banana slug country (the Pacific Northwest).

Anonymous said...

besides the fact that last flag is really wonky, Semper ("always") being changed to Simper ("a coy smile") really changes the attitude of the marines cake.

Anonymous said...

I always pictured marines as really masculine tough guys. But to picture them simpering just KILLS that image!

Jay said...

Looks like someone tried to 'simper fi' the US flag. As a Canadian I've seen it all too often with our poor maple leaf. (BTW, those Sunday Sweets were a(u)wesome!)

I also think that young American girls had better beware on July 4th, lest their beau try to get indenpdants. *slap*

wv: yalis - Yalis gonna have a great holiday now y'hear?

Becky said...

And here I thought those collssal cookies were topped with patriotic bacon.

hyphen8 said...

@ Fluffy Cow - I think that third cake might be half of a round cake laid on the cut edge...but I wouldn't pay money for it. :p

Kirstie said...

OH MY GOSH! I was just scrolling back through the last dozen posts, because i've been busy with work and haven't been able to stay up to date and just about woke up the entire house when i saw the 4 jluy cake. I haven't laughed so hard in ages.
That has to be the cover of your next book. It's so short and to the point. How do you mess that up???

Kirstie
VW- legiter
"if it got any legiter, i'd have to quit"

Amy Lee said...

Hey my birthday is in Jluy!

Anonymous said...

I think the "skid marks on the cookies actually look like the Russian flag (not the USSR, the new one). That's kind of ironic.