Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Annual Wreckage Review

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

"Good season, bakers, good season! A lot of you showed up, some of you made some stuff, a few gave roughly 65%, and I'd say this Easter was our 'best' yet!

"Now, let's review how our new designs performed this year. Elmer? I believe you have some numbers for us?"

"Yes, thank you, sir. [starting slide show] First up, our 'Clown Face Bunny' here made a huge impression in the 3-7 age bracket...

"...but, unfortunately, most were screaming too incoherently for us to make much of their feedback.


"Next up, 'Dalek Face' seemed to garner a lot of attention from college students in particular:

"Plus at least one customer was spotted chasing his girlfriend yelling, 'EXTERMINATE,' so I'd call that a 'win.'"


"'Bunny brick,' however, went over like a ton of itself:

"I think next year we should add a tail."


"Our cross-over design for Passover, 'Rabbi Rabbit', also had mixed reviews:

"Something about an explosive head injury? I don't know. You guys see anything wrong here?"


"'Well, moving on, 'Ninja Bunny' made a killing, in a manner of speaking:

"So I'd say we made a good call on the throwing carrots."


"'Baby Bunny Cake' was also a hit...

"...er, with cats.
"Yes, I know it's strange, but we had several customers wander over from the pet aisle, and they told us their cats loved the feather accents. So that's a keeper right there."


"'Puddle o' Poo,' however, actually got a few complaints:

"It turns out our marketing team was wrong: people only like chocolate icing poo when it's featured on Cake Wrecks. To quote our Marketing lead Stacey, 'Our bad.'"


"And finally, our Simpsons tribute lamb may need to get chopped next year. (Heh. Aheh. Little joke for you there.)

"Ahem. Yes, it turns out, not everyone loves Moe the bartender. So next year Marketing suggests we try a Maggie model, with a sugar pacifier."

"It's gonna be awesome."


Thanks to our Wreckporter Review Committee Kay S., Meghann M, Leanne P., Beth P., Alicia F., Katie G., Caitlin T., & Julia S. See y'all next year!
Fluffy Cow said...

Seriously?
*shaking head*

So glad Easter is over... these cakes are going to give me nightmares.

LolaKatz said...

I would buy that Simpsons Lamb in a minute. But then again, I like my food to smirk at me.

SuBee said...

The Rabbi Rabbit might like to look into making an appearance on Law and Order: UK. He looks rather like a barrister.

Jen B said...

The Simpson lamb made me laugh out loud. I definitely could see that branching off into other animal cakes.

Karen Greenberg said...

I love the lamb. I know, I may be a little strange...

Deirdre said...

I am pretty sure I just laughed myself sick. (wiping eyes) Fantastic commentary!

Jennifer said...

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
stop and breathe
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Gary said...

I'm pretty sure Ninja Buny has two heads.
Hapsburg Ninja Bunny?

Donna said...

Quick! Someone help Moe out of that lamb outfit before he gets hacked to pieces by cake mongers!

ninja dude 12 said...

Get out of my bahahahahahr ! -moe the lamb

Anonymous said...

Makes me glad I don't celebrate Easter

Hjax said...

Dalek Face made me giggle - mostly because I know several college students would would be chasing each other around the store yelling "EXTERMINATE!"

On the other hand, the Simpson lamb is hands down the scariest lamb I've ever seen in my life...

Anonymous said...

WV pretty much sums it up:

spithedl.

Yoshimay said...

Dalek!! :D

bassgirl said...

Creepy 'Clown Face Bunny' looks like he is saying "LET ME OUT OF HERE!"

Don't do it!!

Anonymous said...

I immediately thought of Mo when I saw the lamb cake!

mel said...

Who knew Easter would be such a fertile field...? I think the eyes on the Bunny Brick cake are upside down...I think the pink arch is the mouth..not that changing it would help. Easter Bunny feathers??? I'm tickled.... But my favorite is the Puddle O' Poo bunny...made me spit my Pepsi. (Warning: don't drink and read Cake Wrecks at the same time! It's not only hazardous to your health, but also messy on your computer.)
Thanks for the laughter!

wv - defrates: to remove the frates

Say g'night, Gracie said...

I'm trying to picture Maggie Simpson as a lamb now. It could work.

BADKarma! said...

That lamb looks deranged. I mean, way more than Moe the Bartender. We're talking "Sideshow Bob" deranged, here...

Unknown said...

omg that IS Moe! If there was a way to turn that cake into a statue, I'd buy it in a heartbeat.
Thanks, Cake Wrecks.

msyendor said...

Keep an eye on that bunny brick cake. I think it and the yeller critter behind it are planning to breed.

KILL THE WABBIT! KILL THE ... Sorry. EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!

Moe lamb cake *shudder* stake it now. Voting for a Marge lamb next. Think of all the mounds of blue ...

What, no cakes for "Administrative Professional's Day"? (Or are we all too busy plot-, er, planning "Office" wrecks to drop in the lunchroom?)

Anonymous said...

Okay, one of my favorite posts ever. Do you think they're hiring in the marketing department?

-michelej

jo said...

Passover crossover Rabbi Rabbit! ROFL genius. sheer genius! (or should I say shear, in honor of Moe the Baaartender?)

meanwhile, who thought it was a good idea to stick feathers in cake? those are the kind that molt and will get all over the icing. YUCK.

wv: fibachu. a new chewable high fiber weight loss product. from Japan.

SailorCresselia said...

I would TOTALLY be one of the college students running around yelling 'EXTERMINATE.'

Simply because I could.

Loo-E Loo-I said...

LOL at the Ninja Bunny, but I don't like him because it seems he took some carrots away from the NMBCJs.

Not. Cool.


wv: snestlyn: @ mysyendor...You're right, that yellow critter is snestlyn up to the bunny brick cake! Ewwwwww!

Anonymous said...

Exterminate! Hahaha brill :D Also, I once had a scary dream about a ninja bunny. Not only was it determined to kill me, it was also a cartoon and acted like a Weeping Angel. Now that should be on a cake! Doctor Who is awesome. No question :D Can't wait for the next episode on Saturday!

Keeley said...

I love the Simpsons Lamb! And I'm sure that either a Maggie or a Marge cake would be a big hit next year. I agree with Gary, the Ninja bunny has two heads--either Hapsburg or Janus?

Craig said...

I like how 'Clown Face Bunny' is flattened on top by the cover. But my first impression contained the words, 'vacuum jar'.

I think 'a ton of bunny bricks' should become the official form of the idiom. I can see one of these as an experiment; you know, put it out there and say, "is this anything?". But two implies purpose, and not necessarily beneficent purpose at that.

Rabbi Rabbit? (sigh) Back to the Bunker(TM)...

There is kind of a minimalist thing going on with 'Ninja Bunny', as in 'minimal effort in execution'. First, how many rabbits have six eyes? Secondly, what is going on at the lower end of the right carrot? (Looks like lint). C, what is the yellow blob on the cake board supposed to represent -- a further statement of wreckerator indifference? IV, why does this one make me think of Rip Taylor.

'Baby Bunny Cake' features two things that are literally inseparable: frosting and feathers. Mmmm.

I have to admire the ingenuity of the wreckerator who rose to the challenge of attaching bunny flotsam to a mound of frosting by finding yet another use for poo.

Finally, that lamb may be the creepiest yet. Is that a horn on top?

Anonymous said...

O.M.G. That lamb TOTALLY looks like MOE!!!!

WV "jagat" - that cake walks the jagat line between wrecktastic status and copyright infringment

Car Title Loans said...

I think that lamb was still alive! I can't wait to see what disasters come for Arbor day, if any. Something about tree cakes just sounds extremely amusing.

Anonymous said...

I thought the lamb cake looked like a Grinch in sheep's clothing.
It's the smile.

The Rabi Rabbit either can turn his head all the way around like an owl, or he's just happy to see us.....

Andrea

Mags said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA @ the Rabbi Rabbit!! ;)

tiny purple elephant said...

Jen,John

The eyes on the 3rd cake the brick-bunny cake are Peepers Puppet.

You slip it on like a ring on your middle finger and squeeze your finger tips together.

I have purchased dozens of these in different colours. Kids love them!

Mike said...

“Li-i-i-isa! I thought you lo-o-o-oved me! Lo-o-o-oved me-e-e!”

The Moe cake looks as though it’s frosted with mashed potatoes!

Rita said...

Some of those bunny cakes remind me of the movie Donnie Darko. I need to cleanse my brain now thank you.

Anonymous said...

Ninja bunny, oh man I really wish they had put two carrots in each hand cause seriously I would have died laughing at carrot nunchuck references.

And you were right that bunny did look like a Rabbi with an exploding head injury.. was that suppose to be some sort of flower?

WV hosest: "Hosest that Cake Wrecks isn't the funniest cake site ever?"

Anonymous said...

WV: cleffer

Jen and John (HoJ), I don't know how you come up with these cleffer comments, but I'm awfully glad you do! You make my day - every day.

Merry from Annie's Book Stop/Sharon, MA

Unknown said...

Look, it's Little Bunny Poo Poo!

Briessa said...

I thought Rabbi Rabbit had a toilet seat cover on his head... complete with a little yellow urine-soaked paper on top.

Anonymous said...

After seeing Rabbi Rabbit, I am now craving butter creme.

~Elizabeth

Marie said...

I think my 5 year old niece who was standing next to me as I read this summed it up best after seeing the first picture "awww what a cute hamster!" no need to add anything to that.

Danielle said...

Oh my goodness, that Simpsons Lamb killed me! XD

Sandy said...

OMG, that lamb does look like Moe!

Micalah said...

These cakes a haunting my nightmares! Make them stop!

Anonymous said...

Your running commentaries truly are "the icing on the cake"!

Grady Owens said...

EASTERMINATE

Unknown said...

Hah, Simpsons lamb made me think of this:

http://smotri.com/video/view/?id=v956076185f

Go to 4:03.

:D

Barbara said...

The first cake is terrifying. Don't let him out. Oh the horrors of being asleep and waking up to that thing staring down at you.

Amy said...

My first thought at seeing Ninja Bunny was Conjoined Twins Bunny (or is that Conjoined Twin Bunnies)? :-)

wv: rapnetsm - the awed disbelieving state of Cake Wrecks readers after viewing a week's worth of rabbit wrecks.

Bonita said...

My goodness, but the lamb is phenomenal! I think that glare might have been on purpose...a cake with a lil bit of attitude x]. I'd totally hi five the baker right there x]!!

crowleyancanto said...

Another day, another cake wreck (sigh). Love that planet-of-the- apes-lamb-of-god cake. It should not be eaten and be preserved for posterity's sake. Amen.

Anonymous said...

AAAAAAAUGH! It's the return of the "Fingeroo" eyeballs from last Friday! AAAAAAAUGH!

Love the Doctor Who reference, btw. I am OBSESSED with that show. Seriously. I know the name of every episode since 2005.

Benron said...

That lamb looks like the creepy Bil Baird lamb puppet in The Sound of Music. Ho-Ho-Lay-He-Ho-Ho-Lee-Ho!!!

Terrs said...

I wonder if someone looking like the Doctor walked by and that Dalek face cake and it shouted, "The Doctor must be EXTERMINATED!!!!" win!

Lynn Simpson said...

L-O=V=E the Doctor Who reference. Who would have guessed that my son would actually be interested in my favorite website?

Anonymous said...

HAHAHA SIMPSONS LAMB. Jen I love you. And that thing does look RIDICULOUSLY like moe.

Marnie said...

Rabbi Rabbit and Simpson's Lamb...Have I mentioned lately how much I love this blog? Thanks for a good laugh today!

Monica said...

Two comments. First, I would totally buy a Dalek/bunny cake. Second, who on earth thought FEATHERS were a good idea for a cake decoration? Bleck. That's worse than biting down on eggshell.

WV: crize. The crize of children who saw the bunny brick cake could be heard for miles around.

Alisa @ A stitch in between said...

that lamb... is starring into my soul... and creeping the bejuses out of me

Amanda said...

$8.99? Seriously? Maybe if you needed a frosting fix.
Puddle of poo. Oh dear.

Anonymous said...

throwing carrots? bwahahahahahaha

that one DOES look like Moe! EXTERMINATE

@etselec- oh, freakin' heck!! now, I'll be singing that for DAYS.

-Barbara Anne

Daniel Smotherman said...

That poor sheep haha

All That's Left Are The Crumbs said...

Is that a contact lens storage container as the eyes on the Bunny brick cake? Ewwww.