Vehicular Cakeslaughter

Every now and then - and I'm not saying this happens often - professional bakers have a little trouble making cakes that look like...well, anything. (See examples here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here .)

Perhaps hardest of all is the vehicle cake. There's just something about all those shapes and circles and squares that drives even the most hardened Shop-a-Lot Davinci to edible clip art with the watermarks still on:

Now, if only we had a picture of chocolate drizzle and sprinkles...

So let's say you want KITT from Knight Rider on your cake:

Binka binka binka binka dinka binka dinka binka...

[That was me singing the theme song. Obviously.]

Rather than attempt the entire car, your baker might try to home in on KITT's most distinguishing feature:

The ketchup-and-mustard smear under his seat.

Or how about this tractor?

At first glance, you might think this could be broken down into a simple drawing of two boxes on two wheels.

BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

It's an extremely complicated design, and rendering it in icing is so unbelievably difficult that the finished product would be far beyond the bounds of mere mortal comprehension.

Yeah. Like that.

And finally, let's say your child wants a school bus cake:

(Oh, you know this is going to be good.)

You might end up with this:

It's not short. It's "fun sized!"

Thanks to Andie K., Brooke & Mike K., Lea B., & Pete H. for keeping us on track today.