And be sure to set your DVR for these soon-to-be-hits...
An unlikely partnership leads a con artist-turned-Tennis-enthusiast to teach his young Ninja protégé yodeling in...
What a Racket!
Our hot new teen drama, A Lot Like Twilight, features plenty of drama, betrayal, more drama, pale guys who might be vampires, crying, rippling abs, and whatever this is:
Yeah. Dramatic.
And, by popular demand, the star of the much beloved Microsoft Word program, That Paperclip Guy, gets his own reality show! Don't miss the fun as he and his plucky sidekick Bulbous tour the nation, terrorizing interns!
"I see you're trying to write a letter!BWAHAHAHA!! So. Not. Happening."
You won't want to miss this years hottest, sexiest, steamiest medical drama:
Grey's PodiatryAnd finally, for those of you mired in hopeless childhood nostalgia that forces you to hurl money at anything from the 80s or 90s, don't miss our re-boot of the season:
Mighty Morphin Power Fishermen!
So, TV fans, pop the popcorn, grab the remote, and get ready to watch reruns on Hulu! Yeah!
Thanks to Joshua W., Courtney S., Cari C., & Cheryl S. for today's Fail Lineup.
What IS that thing on the first cake? I swear, I can't figure it out.
ReplyDeleteEnglish teacher can't
ReplyDeleteclose what was never opened,
Sobs at quotemark eyes.
wv: bacro
I'll be backro after the commercials.
Oooooorrrrrr.....
ReplyDeleteThe Ninja Vampire that works at a shoe store but fishes on the weekends?
I see a new reality show in the making. Right. Here.
Doughnut Vader scowls.
ReplyDeleteWhere's his red saber? Heck, where's
his ventilator?
wv: altiness
We are not worthy, your altiness.
The second cake is obvious! There was an explosion at the Wassap colorful box making factory. The little colorful boxes fell off the conveyor belt and two workers were knocked over by the blast. Fortunately, the colorful boxes were sturdy enough that they were not damaged by the blast.
ReplyDeleteThanks to that first cake, Ninja Vampire Bagels will now haunt my dreams...
ReplyDeleteHead to Hollywood John & Jen, these are the most original show ideas this season!
I was really hoping that the second cake was a "Where's Waldo" cake... mainly because it took me a minute to find him.
ReplyDelete@flying gargoyle...
ReplyDeleteNINJA VAMPIRE BAGELS!!!!! OMG, I LOVE it!!!
And that foot cake is just creepy -- what is it about body-part cakes that people like to order them so much? Blech!!
.
I was a psych minor in college in the eighties so I can tell you that he second cake is a rorschach cake. Different subjects see different things in the images depicted in the frosting. What do you see...
ReplyDeletewell, at least they were too lazy to pipe a poo pile on that first cake and instead just plopped a doughnut on there. a yodeling ninja doughnut is much better than a yodeling ninja poo pile!
ReplyDelete-your gloriously geeky reader kate
MIGHTY MORPHING FISH MEN *runs off screen, crying/laughing* No, really, *sniff* I'll be fine...just find me in a half an hour and I'll be all good.... ;D
ReplyDeleteThe first cake is not completely terrible, it just suffers from Trochee Fixation (http://xkcd.com/856/). Happy Ninja Donut Tennis Racket Sixteenth!
ReplyDeleteWHAT was that second one supposed to be???
ReplyDeleteSharon
The second cake is clearly two people planking in midair. At a rock concert. Where something exploded. And made everything square. Yep, I'm stickin' to that.
ReplyDeleteI think the thing on the first cake is Bat-Donut.
ReplyDeleteAnd I now want a Mighty Morphin' Power Angler.
Call me a weirdo but I kinda love that it's a nija donut on that first one.
ReplyDeleteThe evil microsoft paperclip getting it's own show is even worse than the Geico Cave Men getting one (I was sooooooo glad that failed)
I don't see anything wrong with the first one. I don't get the joke... but it's not my cake; I don't have to.
ReplyDeleteDid you notice the 2nd cake says "wassup?" Good question.
ReplyDeleteI think I'm going to bribe my 11-year-old to be Ninja Donut for Halloween.
I love that the second cake says "Wassup!" Wassup, indeed.
ReplyDeleteDan,
ReplyDeleteI like the ninja donut, too. It's kind of adorable.
That black thing on the first cake looks like a ninja donut!
ReplyDeleteLove, love the evil paperclip and light bulb! that's funny...I don't care who you are...
ReplyDeletewv: beterana
wv: bingim
What? That doesn't look anything like the Microsoft Office Assistant. It's a light bulb.
ReplyDeleteA ninja and a tennis racket? Someone's stringing us along....
ReplyDeleteThat second cake represents the Fall of Civilization Through the Use of Excessive Telecommunication. While the woman continues to talk (an unfortunate stereotype, the man has already succumbed to inner-ear overload and fallen flat. Their two cell towers (the ying and yang of life) have also fallen, shooting sparks of astonishment all over, while the little squares represent bits (or bytes) of knowledge lost for all time as the Antennae of Communication collapse. The "Wassup?" is the last bit of irony (and a subtle warning) as nothing is up, it's all fallen down.
The third cake was inspirational: I finally saw the light....
The "Foot & Flip-flop Cake" is the visualization of a common expression -- not a leg to stand on...
And last cake is a leaked photo from a classified training film where the Power Rangers attempt to combine their powers to gather food and thus cause an eel-like fish to rise to the surface of a stream. I think that episode is only found on the complete box set.
wv-toedise: a popular summer beach game where participants roll dice with their feet.
Ok, while I love the idea of an evil paperclip and bulb friend terrorizing people, the foot cake is just wrong. It looks as if we are seeing the SOLE of the foot with the toes turned around....Creepy.
ReplyDeleteI want to know the back-story on the first cake. Doughnut, tennis, superhero, semaphore loving 16 year old?
ReplyDelete@BADKarma: "Mighty Morphin' Power Angler"= Awesome!!!
wv: ovessly
These cakes are ovessly wrecks.
I've spent too much time looking at that ninja-donut. At first I thought "little miss ninja", but then I was trying to figure out what is up with its hands. As I was staring at it I began to realize that it was STARING BACK AT ME! And I don't think it likes me! Now I'm a little bit afraid to turn my back on my computer.
ReplyDeleteOh yea, these make sense O_o
ReplyDeleteHmmm....rippling abs... does that mean John (THoJ) will be staring in 'A Lot Like Twilight'?
ReplyDeleteI was so stunned by trying to decipher the cake that I didn't even notice the "wassup".
First cake shows an electric bug zapper. Lots of fun to use, and needed for a black ninja vampire bagel! Better install a 9V battery instead of the normal AA.
ReplyDeleteJMP
I have a total bad-boy crush on that crazy-eye tennis ninja donut thingy. I hope he takes me for a ride on his motorcycle and shows off his nunchuck skillz for me. And then we can have a really bad break-up where he punches holes in the wall and I cyber-stalk him for a while.
ReplyDeleteGrey's Podiatry!! So much better than the original.
ReplyDeleteWhat is UP with the big toe on the foot cake? Is that a spider crawling on there? Who knew arachnids had a sweet fang?
ReplyDelete@mel at 10:57
ReplyDeleteI actually thought to myself, as I was viewing the 2nd cake, "I can't wait to hear Mel's psychological take on this."
Once again, you've managed to explain "wassup." Brilliant!
As a result of wrecks like these, I have vowed to never drink my tea/coffee while sitting in front of my computer...Ninja Vampire Bagel/Donut = AWESOME!
ReplyDeleteWhy is the ninja donut doing semaphore with candles? Is it trying to spell Happy Birthday or "let's play tennis"?
ReplyDeleteGiven the lightning bolt on the handle, I think that's a bug zapper, not a tennis racket. My brother has one. In which case, I think you're being encouraged to zap ninja doughnuts like the pests they are and disdainfully scrape their corpses into the garbage disposal while experiencing the supreme satisfaction of dealing death by electrocution.
ReplyDelete-KW
I'm a bit disturbed by the "bulimic hoarders..." - what are they hoarding exactly?!? Ew.
ReplyDeleteThat second cake looks like it was inspired by Robot Chicken.
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or is bulb man pointing to where his crotch would be, if he had one?
ReplyDeleteOw my braiiinnnn...
I'm kinda in love with Ninja Donut. I think he needs to be mohawked baby carrot jockey's sidekick.
ReplyDeletewow those are the ugliest cakes I even see on my birthday which is today
ReplyDeleteyou know, I made better cakes with my Suzy Homemaker oven. they looked better too.
ReplyDeleteThis makes me L.O.L.
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely tuning into these tv shows this summer. :)
"You won't want to miss this years hottest, sexiest, steamiest medical drama: Grey's Podiatry".
ReplyDeleteNo, this should read, "You won't want to miss this years most horrifying, sinister, spine-chilling medical drama: Night of the Living Foot. Watch our star, Big Foot, as he battles foot fungus, blisters, corns, stinky feet, bunions, gout and more. So scarey you won't take your eyes off the screen."
Jackie
Oh, you people make me laugh so much. Not just the wrecks and THOSE priceless comments (always precisely hilarious) - which are gems, by the way - but...the often hilarious comments like, do me in.
ReplyDeleteNINJA VAMPIRE BAGELS joins the lexicon alongside the camel jockeys! Gotta love Cake Wrecks!
ReplyDeleteYou guys always, ALWAYS crack me up. Not just the wrecks and their totally spot-on descriptions (how do you GET that funny, seriously?) - but...the sometimes hilarious comments accompanying said wreck(s) - they like, do me right in. : )
ReplyDeleteOmg...I *NEED* a ninja donut. Right now. I'm going to try to figure out how to sew one together.
ReplyDeleteI believe that those are Lightspeed rescue power rangers. so many different ones.
ReplyDeleteI hope if I ever develop toenail fungus it looks like the palm tree on the sandal cake.
ReplyDeleteTrevor, I'm thinking it's some kind of hockey puck man. Bahahaha! Either way WTF is going on with these cakes, especially the foot cake. I hate feet and feel like I would definitely unfriend anyone who ever made that cake for me.
ReplyDeleteI desperately needed a laugh, and you came through for me! Thanks. In my gratitude, I might actually be willing to watch an episode of one of those shows. ... OK, maybe I'm not that grateful.
ReplyDeleteOh, and I thought it was, "Bulimic Hoarders with STDs Who Didn't Know They Were Pregnant at 16."
WV: gater. Later gater.
McSteamy, McDreamy, McFootFettish?
ReplyDeletegreat - now you got me imagining how mighty morphin power fishermen might go. All the over-exaggerated movements in the original now applied to the epic struggle to reel in the tad-pole - who turns into 'the big one' by low-budget effects magic.
ReplyDeleteIt's totally a bug zapper in the first cake.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.amazon.com/Koolatron-Lentek-Biteshield-RZ02-Electronic/dp/tags-on-product/B000H7CUSQ
Looks like the Alien Rangers of Aquitar took over PR: Lightspeed. I always thought there was something fishy about them...
ReplyDeleteIt took me about 2 seconds, but I think I know what that second cake is supposed to be.
ReplyDeleteA replication of a screencap of Guitar Hero or Rock Band.
At least that's what the colorful squares remind me of, but I got nothin' on the 'wassup?'
WV: Asesseri. This cake has way too many asesseries
Yay - 2 Haiku Joy posts today!
ReplyDeleteHonestly, as awesome as the cakes are, the comments are even better!
Love ninja-donut...trying to think of a way to make him in plush. He needs to be on a t-shirt, I think.
wv: conce - I'll conce you after I finish laughing at these wrecks.
As the creatornofnthe Ninja Donut, I feel compelled to explain. First, let me start by saying I find it a great honor to be on cakewrecks. You should have heard my squeal when I logged on this afternoon!
ReplyDeleteSo, my cousin was turning 16 and having a joint party with her friend. He likes drawing ninja donuts and she plays tennis. I think he may even have a website with all his ninja donut shenanigans. And that's how we got the odd mashup. I told her it would no doubt end up on cake wrecks, and submitted it myself!
The little killer is really sweet if you get to know him!
Sarah Walker--
Cakes and SEW on...
i gotta admit, i really liked that ninja doughnut thing from the first cake
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing the baker thought the Power Rangers were men in SCUBA gear.
ReplyDeletethat foot!
ReplyDeletethose toes!
I get the feeling the 'wassup' cake is supposed to be Guitar Hero or something similar(Rock Band maybe?).
ReplyDeleteYou had me at paperclip guy.
ReplyDelete@Sarah Eden Walker:
ReplyDeleteYou rock! I always get such a kick out of it when bakers love their cakewrecks moment. Honestly, it means you've arrived! Kind of like getting Weird Al to cover your song... but your ninja donut is great.
wv murshuc: Aww, murshuc, I'm on cakewrecks!
The second cake looks to be a background for the SBMAIL cartoon show Sweet Cupping Cakes.
ReplyDeleteWV: Mones
Those making cakes think they'll be rolling in the mones.
That giant foot looks like it either has gout or a toe fungus..scary lol. My eyes will never ever unsee these cakes but I am sure worse ones are on the way. Otherwise I would be sad without a cake to cry over lol.
ReplyDeleteToe-dully gettin' me some o' dat Foot Upsidedown Cake. Please pass the nail clippers.
ReplyDeleteOk, props to wreck-- er, decorators who are good sports and can take some good-natured 'heat' while they're in the kitchen (so to speak).
ReplyDeleteBut there is still no explanation for the ninja donut itself. As for the others, I don't know whether to hope someone knows something that can make sense of them or to fear that that might be so.
I don't know how many other people who visit Cake Wrecks would even know this song, but I'm hearing "Ninja Donut Vampires" to the tune of My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult's "The Days of Swine and Roses."
ReplyDeleteJust a side note: The Ninja Donut on the first cake is so badass he's actually using CHINESE martial arts weapons. Specifically these: http://martial-arts-shop.eu/product/description/894/Chinese_Fighting_Twin_Hook_Swords(C-616S).html.
ReplyDeleteFor some odd reason, I'm kinda in love with the neon explosion 'wassup' cake, and the ninja tenis love child cake.
ReplyDeleteThe foot though, *hurls*.
Add me to the ninja donut fan. No idea why someone would come up with such an idea, but kudos to @Sarah Walker for doing such a good job with rather odd designs! AND for having a such a good sense of humour!
ReplyDeleteI think @Mel has the best explanation for the second cake, but "Mighty Morphin Power Fishermen" was brilliant for the fourth one. Although, not to carp but doesn't it look like they're disco dancing?
I do think that foot cake is upside down. Which means that the Greys Podiatry cast needs help from Greys Anatomy surgeons...
But I do take issue with your Clippy/Bulbous idea. While very funny in this context, you do realize that certain networks which are bereft of decent entertainment ideas will try to turn it into a sitcom? (Personally, I think they should just take ABC's cancelled series, since those are better than most of what the others keep...)
I really liked the paperclip guy and would click on him for a "trick" periodically...then, there was the doggie who would wag his little digital butt...(sobs) I miss them!! (my company changed oursystem and we couldn't have them anymore)
ReplyDelete-Barbara Anne
My birthday was on 12th of july and I came across this lovely blog today.
ReplyDeleteAlso, visit http://naeemptc.blogspot.com to collect some extra money to the cake.
Okay, I want an apron or T-shirt with cutie Ninja Donut!!
ReplyDeleteLove the foot!
ReplyDeleteI was just reading and my son (6) is apparently looking over my shoulder. When I got to the Power Ranger one he says, "Awesome! I know what that one is! It's the one where they are trying to save Zordon and there are giant fish in the river." I'll spare you the rest of the 30 minute discussion. So... There you go. lol.
ReplyDelete*groan* Not that darn paperclip! I have never known a cartoon to be so darn annoying. Have you noticed that he's gone missing from recent Microsoft Suites? Looks like they finally got the hint that we hated the guy!
ReplyDeleteThat would make a good cake for an executive assistant... "Guess who's ba-aack?"
That second cake would not look out of place hanging on a wall at the Museum of Modern Art. *strikes thoughtful art appreciation pose* Although I am not a painter, I think that the iconicity of the negative space endangers the devious simplicity of the exploration of montage elements.
ReplyDelete