But now it will haunt us both day and night.This cake makes a mockery of my horror, Chris L. It's also really icky. Tell me, do all University of Texas cakes look like week-old medical specimens?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
The Tell-Tale Heart
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
It's impossible to say how this idea first entered the decorator's brain...
But now it will haunt us both day and night.
This cake makes a mockery of my horror, Chris L. It's also really icky. Tell me, do all University of Texas cakes look like week-old medical specimens?
But now it will haunt us both day and night.This cake makes a mockery of my horror, Chris L. It's also really icky. Tell me, do all University of Texas cakes look like week-old medical specimens?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Search This Blog
Wreck the Halls
NEW! Pre-Order Today!
|
Buy the Book
Buy the NYT Bestseller
What's a Wreck?
What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
- Jen
tabs
- Fan Faves
- The Classics
The Classics
Awards
Praise for the Book
- “Will have you laughing so hard you’ll forget to eat!”— Washington Post
- “a hilarious winner” — The Oregonian
- “a fantastically gut-busting book”— NPR
- “It’s all here, each wreck a disaster of hilarity.” — BookPage.com
- “Hysterically funny!”— Epinions.com
- “laugh-out-loud funny”— The Times
- “Yates’ sharp humor makes the funny even funnier.” — The Dallas Morning News
- “an amazing laugh-out-loud book”— The Book Triblog
What the fans are saying
- "I was laughing so hard, I couldn't catch my breath."
- "As funny as the blog that started it."
- "WAY better than I expected!"
- "Cake Wreckery at its best!"
- "Wrecktastic!"
Awards
- American Mensa:Top 50 Websites of 2010
- Amazon: Top 10 gift books of 2009
- The Orlando Sentinal “Orbbies”: Winner Humor
- 2009 BlogLuxe Awards: Funniest Blog
- 2009 Bloggies: Best Writing of a Weblog, Best New Weblog, Best Food Blog
- The 2008 Weblog Awards: Best Food Blog
- Blogger's Choice 2008 Awards: Best Humor Blog
order
Where's the book?
We don’t have any copies of Cake Wrecks for sale here, autographed or otherwise. We decided the shipping and handling costs would be too high to make it worth your while. So instead, buy your copies locally or online and then order personalized bookplates: it’s cheaper, easier, and I think even looks a bit nicer.
Ordering Info
Payments must be made through Paypal, which accepts all major credit cards. Sorry, but that means no checks or MOs or barter-based chickens.
We ship everything first class USPS, and will do our best to have your package in the mail within 2 days of your order.
Popular This Month
Popular This Month
Archives
-
▼
2008
(233)
-
▼
December
(44)
- Party Like It's 1999
- Why You Don't Raid Other People's Refrigerators
- Grandpa's Order
- Sunday Sweets Assignment
- Winter Wonderland Sweets Continued
- Goy Gaffes
- Kwanzaa Will Not Be Spared
- In So Many Words...
- Santa Gets the Shaft
- The Tell-Tale Heart
- Yes, Let's!
- Totally Cheating
- Sunday Sweets: Winter Wonderland
- Ye Olde Yuletide Ax
- When Gangsters Go "PC"
- Cheery O's
- Whirled Peas
- Seasonal Non Sequiturs
- But Where are the Blue Birds?
- You Just Can't Buy That Kind of Advertising
- Dino-Mite!
- Sunday Sweets Assignment
- Sunday Sweets: Cake Nouveau
- What Makes Jen Happy?
- The Easiest Cake Theme EVER
- Keith and What's-Her-Name
- The World's Most Cheerful Hanging
- Suite Interview
- More Wreckwear!
- The Cutest Misspellings of "Happy Birthday" I Have...
- The Haunted Holidays
- Artistic License
- "Cleuless" is Right
- Too Hot to Handle, Too Cold to Hold
- Sunday Sweets: Off-the-Shelf Cuteness
- How Many Blogs Have Tribute Parties?
- What Do You Get for an Investment Banker?
- Guest Blogging at Cupcakes Take the Cake
- The Cupcakes Were Made of Irony
- The Most Wonderful Time of the Year
- Wedding Wrecks
- Calling All Wreckporters!
- Fetal Bites
- Because Every Blog Needs a Jingle
-
▼
December
(44)
147 comments | Post a Comment
Are you sure that's not a uterus? I always thought the University of Texas' mascot was a uterus...
To the "decorator"'s credit, my first guess when I looked at it was "Texas Longhorn". But, I'm a big football fan, so I had a good idea of what it should look like.
This would be the prize winning entry in the "Poop a Texas Longhorn for Thanksgiving" contest. Oy Vey.
I'm SO glad you mentioned University of Texas or I would have been baffled all day wondering what could have inspired such a monstrosity!
...meaning that's supposed to be a Texas Longhorn, NOT a gouged out heart on a necklace.
That's just...wrong. In other news, congrats on being the Site of the Day on ew.com!
Or is it a Texas Long-Horn?
Ewww. That cake looks... just scary.
Blech! If you hadn't identified what it's allegedly supposed to be, I never would have guessed. It does, indeed, look like the remnants of an autopsy dropped on a cake.
That is pretty hidious. I figured out that it was a longhorn right away but it does look a bit decayed.
Wow it looks like a pile of oddly colored poo.
University of Texas? Hmmm, I think that maybe it's meant to be a longhorn steer skull rather than a rotting heart dangling from two severed arteries. Sadly, it's better at conveying the latter rather than the former.
Summerschilde
That looks more like something that came out the other end of Bevo!
Poop with horns! Wow. Cut me a slice!
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
and the bleeding dye in the frosting in the.... um, "horns" ... just adds to the appeal, YUM! ewwwwwwwwwww!
Oh, dear, no. I know a whole lot of UT fans who just might pass out looking at that.
omg, on first glance, i thought that *was* dog doo. uck. then i thought, "maybe it's supposed to be the UT logo."
i pity the recipient of this wreck.
Eeeew!
Yay for first comment (in both respects!)
My first thought was that it looked like something my dog would leave in the back yard. Delicious.
Perhaps you are to slice it with a scalpel...
WV- pantop... opposite of pan bottom.
OMG, that is just a disaster. I thought the same things: anatomical specimen, of what sort I could imagine at least three; taxidermy gone horribly wrong; and turned 90°, a snake or komodo dragon head in profile.
The one right above the "heart" that's cut off in the photo looks disturbing too. Almost like the blue and brown "winter" cake.
Hmm...looks like we have some left atrial enlargement. I suspect it's from too much buttercream.
(I just have to say that working at a med school, AND having grown up in Texas, this one amuses me to no ends).
oh, so appropriate for a longhorn cake. I'm an aggie, of course!
It looks like a poop that grew horns.
i sure thought that was a uterus~ ack!
is that what that's supposed to be? because i thought it was an anatomically correct heart made out of poop.
They missed off the ovaries.
Oh. My. God. That is disgusting!
I go to UT, so I immediately knew what it was, but I really didn't want it to be... Maybe an Aggie did it?
Where are the ovaries?
Haha this is so horribly wrong in every way. I love it.
It looks like the Texas longhorn steer massacre.
I'm so glad I read the comments. I'm not the only person who thinks their mascot looks like a uterus. The Fighting Uteri.
Autopsy specimen cake! Yay! I'll have me a big ol' slice of ventricle please and we'll save the aorta for after dinner.
Priceless. Jen, you've outdone yourself as usual. Need an assistant?
Jen,
Please stop it. I've run out of incontinence things and now I have to do another load of laundry!
A uterus! OMG - the funiest thing I've ever seen!
Indi
hmmm...who knew there were so many, many ways to make icing/frosting look like poo? Only here at cake wrecks are we free to explore the variety of colors and textures that give cakes that poo-esque feel. I agree with Andrea...the fact that the dye has bled into the frosting gives this particular poo attempt an added and unnecessary element of realism. Go U of Poo!
~Bonnie B~
This is marginally better than the year a co-worker brought our supervisor a frosting decorated cow-pie for Christmas.
Just, ... WHY?
o<\\\\\;^) Jan the Gryphon
http:\\gryph-wotd.blogspot.com/
wv: hiessest - and boo and thumbs down
As a Texas Tech fan, I'm glad it looks like something a Longhorn with digestive problems produced.
Beautiful Wreck!
Being a non-sportsfan, I first thought it was a poorly executed reindeer. Well that was my third thought, the first two were obviously heart and uterus.
I can hear the decorator talking to her buddies now, "Well since I trimmed them off and put them on this necklace, Steve stays home at night. No more divorce talk either!" Yikes!!!!!!
I couldn't decide if this was depicting a rather macabre necklace Angelina Jolie would have worn in her younger years, or if someone was paying homage to blossoming ob/gyns in med school.
I wasn't sure what this was suppose to be. I thought it was a very bad attempt at a reindeer
What I want to know about all these cake wrecks, does anyone buy them? Ever?
Here is the EW site of the day link, in case you haven't seen it!
Eeeuuuwww! I can't tell if that's a vital organ, or some post-Halloween/Thanksgiving orange frosting poo!
wow I thought it was a uterus and fallopian tubes.
I was way off.
OKAY! He's under the floorbooooooards! You caught me red handed, you baking bastard!
UT shall now be called "Poo T." Or is this a UT-erus?
Oh, the puns!!!
Looks like a Georgia O'Keeffe painting... except, you know, horrifying.
I guessed it was a Texas longhorn but that's proably because i live in Texas
word- muness this cake in pure muness
Gees, guys, it's just the mascot, UTerus.
Most definitely a uterus or a heart. Maybe both. What would that be? A hearterus? A uterart?
Honestly, this cake looks like it should have been on the buffet table at an OB/GYN convention. My first thought of what it was, like others, was a uterus and falopian tubes. Seriously. Since I knew that couldn't possibly be what it really was, I was actually stumped. I never would have guessed UT mascot, but I can kind of sort of maybe almost see it.
Hookem' Horns....maybe?
What is it?
An Aggie probably decorated it that way on purpose.
Are you sure this wasn't supposed to be one of the weird "Baby Shower Cakes"? It really does look like a uterus.
I love it!
Signed,
Another Aggie
Yeah, if it weren't for the comments, I'd have no idea what this was supposed to be. Well, I'm making an assumption that someone made an unidentifiable wreck, rather than deliberately decorating a cake with the leavings of a dog inflicted with severe bowel problems.
Why does the longhorn have no face? Also, I found a CakeWrecks mention on PopWatch this morning on www.ew.com. Didn't know if you knew or not. Love this blog!
Is that what it's supposed to be?
Thank goodness you said University of Texas. I had absolutely no idea what in the world that was supposed to be. I had convinced myself that it was indeed a "heart". Sad.
That actually gave me an all body dry heave.
Perhaps it's suppose to be a graduation cake for a Pre-med student from UT? Who might be going to be a Gastoenterologist someday?
Yeah. I would have NEVER guessed that was a University of Texas Longhorn. And I, too, know what it's supposed to look like.
If you hadn't pointed it out, I would have spent the rest of my day wondering why someone would design a moldy-looking heart on a cake :).
Uterus made out of poop! I love it ... I'm so ordering that for my "Happy Menopause Party".
Being from Texas (and having lived north of Austin), I knew it was supposed to be a longhorn...But, it was rather scary-looking (and did look like something from the wrong end of a longhorn).
Are we sure the cake wasn't done by an Aggie fan? I know quite a few rabid Aggies who would probably enjoy that cake :o)
Saw varsity's horns off...
I bet an Aggie did this cake.
What is THAT , because to me it looks like a dog left it there
That's what happens when you get your degree from the TAMU School of Cake Decorating.
I vote "Uterus & Fallopian Tubes with Poo Overtones."
The "decorator" must be a Texas A&M fan...haha!
"No, no, no! It was supposed to be a WHITE cattle skull on a BROWN background, you color-blind moron! Now get back there and start over. You don't have time to use brown frosting, just airbrush it."
Such a mooooooooving conversation.
Word verification: cadess. A female cad.
It actually looks like an attempt at a Texas Longhorns cake. And since I believe they play Wisconsin this weekend in the bowl games (my hubby is a Badger Alum), perhaps a lovely Bucky the Badger cake is next to it?
Nope. Uterus/fallopian tubes or bleeding heart. I do NOT see a Texas longhorn AT ALL. Even after it was mentioned. I do love the brown scalloped border ... adds so much to the "design" ...
UT Longhorn or pile of poo? Jen reports, you decide! So gross!!
Being an OU fan....i think this cake is appropriate. ha ha
I guess I was the only one that thought it looked like a damaged brown jockstrap. I guess I know where my mind goes.
It looks like cow poo! (turns green in utter disgust) :(:(:(
It needs to be on Weird True And Freaky.
I thought this was a sick medical school cake celebrating the completion of gross anatomy.
I need some therapy. That was just traumatic!
I saw this exact same thing on my lawn courtesy of my dog....
as a sooner girl I think it's exactly what a long-horn looks like...something that should be in the toilet! haha! This is probably my favorite wreck yet! Boomer sooner!
-camssoonergirl
LOL... I LOVE it! Perfect!
BOOMER SOONER!
Maybe it is roasted chicken...in frosting...one giant lump of frosting. Honestly these wreckerators need to learn that it will look just fine if the frosting is smoothed out into the shape or whatever the picture is supposed to be. ahhh!
Oh Poo!
Funny, when I first saw this, I thought, "Geez, that's an odd take on the Texas Longhorns logo." You know you've created a wreck when viewers think it looks like what it should but aren't really sure.
Word verification: tives, what will break out on Texas Longhorn fans who eat this cake.
I sure am glad you told us what it was, because I would have never guess that in a million years. Heart on a necklace is what I see...
Definitely made in College Station.
If this cake were only upside down, it would be perfect... I'm an OU fan, so any Longhorn cake would be a wreck. :)
That is maybe the grossest cake I have ever seen on this site. Eeew!
Exactly how long has this wreck been out of the (piping) bag? It's a good indication that something has been unsold for long enough when the icing colors start bleeding. It's as bad as flies in the 5 year old window cakes.
This would be perfect for the serial killer in your life celebrating a birthday! "Look honey! A human heart necklace cake!" "And it's still beating!"
I thought it was a 3D tongue sticking out of a line mouth.
More like the Tell Tale Turd....
I'm pretty sure I've seen that design before...in an infant's diaper. I'm surprised Longhorn fans weren't storming the bakery.
OMG...I agree with dmontag, I am from Texas and at first glance thought of Tech, but yuck! Somebody needs to train that pastry chef, or boot the person that made her mad that day!
*gasp* Oh. My. Horror.
No way would I have ever guessed that was a Longhorn. I was just relieved it didn't say "Wishing you a speedy recovery"
Silly us, we thought the U in UT was for University.
I think the first one is the "Deep (really deep) in the Heart of Texas" cake.
The snowman/chicken cake...
WOW.
So it's not supposed to be a poop necklace? Really?
Texas Longhorn huh? Would it be the sweetbreads of said longhorn perhaps?
Yuck!
Laura H.
This reminds me of the time I saw two banana slugs nestled together in a garden...they looked remarkably like this, only slimier. Neither the slugs nor this wreck make me want any cake!
I assume and Aggie did this.....
That looks like poo on a string to me. Gross. Is it really a TX Longhorns logo?
Um...I must not be up on my college mascots. Even though you identified it as a longhorn, I still couldn't tell what it was. That is one bad cake!!!
Wow. What a horror show. And what a great idea for a blog! I'm hooked!
Are you sure that's not a tongue?
It's a Match Day congratulatory cake that does double duty for budding ob/gyns and coroners!
Happy Transplant!
Good Luck in the Cath Lab!
or, might be good for a final break up...
Well, when I first saw the picture, and hadn't read the commentary....I thought it was an old dried up version of a va-jay-jay.
Second glance, a rotten uterus with fallopian tubes.
"Congrats on your hysterectomy"?
It's not even an anatomically correct heart.
unless that's the pulmonary circuit. but who would want that? that's boring. the systemic circuit is way more interesting.
It looks more like a botched hysterectomy to me...
Holy cow! Not in a million years would I have guessed a texas longhorn! Never, ever, ever!
Oh, come on! This is a perfect "t.u." cake, right Aggies?!
Saw 'em off!
OMG, I thought it was a giant's poo, but yes I can see how it looks like a uterus. Still made me exclaim out loud when the page first opened.
OMG, is that really supposed to be a longhorn? I actually thought maybe it was a horrible rendition of a heart. Like, "Congratulations on surviving your open-heart surgery; here's a pound of frosting to speed your recovery." I mean, shouldn't there be eyes or something if it's a steer?
I saw the longhorn right away (and I'm not a sports person), but that doesn't mean I *wasn't* disturbed by its close resemblance to a uterus.
I'm also of the opinion that it shouldn't look as though as though they placed a decapitated steer's head there, letting it slowly decay. It's an interestingly literal way of doing the cake, but perhaps not best for sales.
The first thing I thought was "pouch front g-string", you know, the kind male strippers wear.
My boyfriend looked at it and was like um....cooch on a string? Here I was wondering why anyone would interpret a dog who's had too much peanut butter in icing. If they wanted it be a UT cake..couldn't they have like air brushed it burned orange? It'd be slightly more recognizable.
Ew, ew and triple ew!!! :( Totally gross, whatever it's supposed to be.
My first thought was University of Texas (my sister-in-laws will be proud) but I thought BeeVo (sp?) was alive not dead and rotting.
It's a uterus...or a heart..or poo with arms...now I need therapy
wvotd nanish.."when I'm spouting off wisdom from my grandmother, I'm being "nanish".
Well, they saw fit to put the thing in a plastic container; that says a lot. About WHAT, I don't know.
I noticed that this particular cake hasn't a price sticker on it...(!)
I noticed as well that it almost seems to be settled into some sort of dark-colored bin.
One might hazard a guess that the receptacle *could* be one of those used for, say, refuse, and what-have-you...that sort of thing.
I could be wrong.
Yea! As a native Austinite (except for my four..ok 5 yrs in CS) and an Aggie, i think this is Bevo with his horns sawed off!! And his face mutilated. But really, we keep things weird here...our bakers are usually stoned, so I wouldn't put it past them to make an organ looking bevo!
Ick!
Why would anyone need a strangulated vulva cake with horns?
I'm surprised so many people saw horns on this thing. My first thought was it was a double pile of poop with churros coming out the sides! Very unappealing to view, and almost stomach-turning to think of actually consuming such a disgusting looking pile of icing. *ick*
Wow, whatever it is, it looks wrong. They should cut it up real quick before anyone sees!
Yep, it's a uterus.
I sort of guessed what it was supposed to be, though I didn't associate it with a mascot (I don't watch football). I thought it was maybe a skull...
...a deformed, bashed-in skull.
Obviously, that's what killed it. A severe head/face injury.
Um...I saw something else in the design, but won't say.
Come on! Even an Aggie could do better, right? LOL
~Amy B
I have to give the decorator credit for trying...... But there is no way that I would have let that cake leave my sight for anything in the world. I would have promptly redone it!!
It looks like a huge set of *you know whats* underneath a thong to me! Yuck!
Blarch. I think i threw up in my mouth a little bit.
Nah. Not the teasip's mascot Bevo. He's oh-so-easy to draw, and he's always 2-D.
This is clearly a seasonal cake. It illustrates the Grinch's heart AFTER it grew three sizes.
Y'all must not have that Christmas spirit yet!
Am I the only one who thought 'Oompa Loompa Dance Belt'? I guess so...
My 7 yr old walked behind me, did a double take and then whispered in my ear "Mom? Why did someone make a cake with balls on it? That's just gross!"
Wow, that's terrible! Tell me that didn't come from a bakery in Austin and if so, which one do I need to avoid?
So this is what happens when you put sooners and aggies in the same cake decorating room.
I don't even get it! What IS that???? It's so so sooo . . random! Ahh cake wrecks, you never fail to entertain me.
is it for a gynaecologist's graduation party?
Just saw this abomination on SpursCorral.com
Somebody was nice enough to share the horror. Hilarity ensued!
That's the best looking longhorn I've seen. Let's face it, they're all very ugly in burnt orange.
Boomer Sooner!
ummm... that's definitely a wandering uterus.. 'hysterical' in every way
Margi
I'm pretty sure that this is a celebration cake for someone who has just had a hysterectomy.
Heart? As a med student I'm more convinced it looks like a uterus from the typical body donator - soaked in formalin for at least 3 months.
Thinking of it, that brown stuff around that thing do look a little like small intestine...
I like that it looks disgusting because I hate the Texas Longhorns. I'm an Aggie :) Can you do an Aggie cake??