AHAHAHAHAAA!!Ew.
Those almost make me long for the days of anthropomorphized, lumpy-armed clover characters.
Almost.Ok, I think it's time we addressed the elephant in the room, guys.
Otherwise he'll just keep trampling on all the shamrocks.Besides, maybe he'll remember what one looks like.
Nooo...
Not quite...
Egads! A pox upon thine cake!Hey, you know what it is? I think I figured it out: the bakers just need a base of reference! A small photo, perhaps, or some shamrock-shaped things, perhaps made out of plastic...
Oh.Never mind.
Psst. Feelin' "lucky," punk?
'Cuz with fronds like those, you've definitely got anemones.Thanks to Trina D., Michele T., Cara H., Alena C., Sara, Coreena N., Nell B., Robin, and also the elephant in the room, who, when confronted with today's wrecks, offered this insightful commentary:
We hear ya, dude.
That first one is so disgusting. Ugh! I'm glad I haven't eaten breakfast yet.
ReplyDeleteHere's shampoo for our real friends, and real poo for our sham friends
ReplyDeleteI was giggling at the cakes and commentary, but that elephant made me lose it. Could we please ask him to go trample the CCCs (ptooie!)?
ReplyDeleteRule one of piping (which, oddly enough, they do NOT cover in Wilton classes): NEVER pipe greenish-brown icing.
ReplyDeleteI do believe I'd take a CCC (ptooie) over that nasty mess in the first one.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I always read the other commenters saying they spewed coffee across their keyboards, but I never actually did this myself until I read the "fronds" and "anemones" line today!! Kudos, CW, you have outdone yourself.
ReplyDeleteThat poor green peacock, with those ugly brown pock mocks on it's tail feathers!
ReplyDeleteAnd the first one definitely is the same stuff I scoop out of the cat box. No question.
wv: sedican
ReplyDeleteBaker: What's your problem? I never sedIcan draw a shamrock.
Wouldn't all of these malformed shamrocks make a person UNlucky?
ReplyDeleteJust sayin.'
I, too, lost it at "fronds" and "anemones." And the elephant was just too adorably funny. My morning has been made!
ReplyDeleteIs it just me, or do some of those shamrocks look like elephants? Especially the first big one...
ReplyDeleteThe first one reminds me of what I just found in my son's diaper. Same color and everything.
ReplyDeleteWV: perts. Hey, Jen and John, comparisons to green baby poo is just one of the perts of your job.
BAHAHAHA! oh poopy St. Patrick's Day cake, why are you so poopy? Who cares, as long as I get my morning laugh fix <3 :)
ReplyDeleteSham...WOW
ReplyDeleteNormie
WV - Banin "After seeing these wrecks we should be banin shamrocks on cakes."
When I saw the title to this post, I thought "NOOoooo!"
ReplyDeleteBut I clicked anyway. :)
(And I think that poxed one is actually the very rare bio-botanical hybrid known as the Shamurkey.)
Tiny baby elephant: Adorable.
ReplyDeleteSham-Poo cupcakes: Not so much...
Oh, and I think you switched two pictures, there in the middle... (I'm pretty sure the Sham-peacock was supposed to go with the commentary on the picture below it).
Blech to the first one. To the rest-WTF! O_o
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!
ReplyDelete"with fronds like those you've definately got anemones" BRAVO!! BRAVO!!
(Couldn't you find any deep fried shamrock cakes? What a shame)
Is Cake #6 made from a turkey template?
ReplyDeleteThat first one looks a lot like the gifts my dog left in the living room the other night, when he wasn't feeling so well & nobody was awake to let him go outside....
ReplyDeleteLong time viewer, first time poster...
ReplyDeleteI have to say this is the first time a cake on here has made my stomach roll. The first one with the mossy/moldy sham-poos is pretty gnarly.
Gumby! I used to love that show when I was a kid.
ReplyDeleteRainbows! with garnish.
The Blob! or a misshapen cactus.
Stingray!
Peacock!
Dragonfly!
um...I think I just failed the Rorshach test.
hahaha "A pox upon thine cake"! I had to try really hard not to laugh loudly & wake my sleeping child! Great post!
ReplyDeleteLOL ShamPOO!! that green is way off...and the consistency is icky...like someone who ate too much green icing....
ReplyDelete#5 looks like an elephant
#6 looks like a shamcock? (shamrock/peacock hybrid)
#7 is a wonky umbrella.
wv: ensmint. when you taste said green icing and realize the flavor--"ensmint!"
Poor little Leprechaun must have one heckuva bad flu to produce those awe-inspiring poo-piles. But i must thank you...Nothing better than a poo-cake to help me stick with the diet ... appetite officially G-O-N-E!
ReplyDeleteNote to self: no more reading CW before breakfast. Really.
ReplyDelete(and kudos for the R&J reference...)
-michelej
So... nobody's up in arms to angrily defend THIS beautiful manifestation of a beloved culture?
ReplyDelete...anybody?
(crickets)
:P
Happy non-Epcot day to you all.
Ugh, I just about lost my breakfast looking at the first one & I haven't even eaten yet!
ReplyDeleteThe third cake from the bottom looks like it started out as a turkey cake and then just got covered with green frosting to make it look like a clover.
ReplyDelete"'Cuz with fronds like those, you've definitely got anemones."
ReplyDeleteI just have to say this is the finest pun I have seen in a long time. You got a mastery of botany, zoology, and a popular saying all into just nine words. Wow!
Now, while St. Patrick's Day has a reputation as a drinking holiday, I would like to point out the following:
ReplyDelete1) Bakers should not drink before decorating the cakes as wonky shamrocks result.
2) Customers should drink before picking up the cakes so they won't notice the wonky shamrocks.
3) There is not enough alcohol on the planet to make anyone want to eat that first...um...thing.
What's up with the green turkey?
ReplyDeleteMy Mom has shamrocks growing in her garden. They look nothing like these cakes- or the green plastic things either for that matter.
WV: rentede: these cake wreckerators just rentede some cake decorating videos so they will do better next time.
nice owl city reference. love it!
ReplyDeleteWe hereby offer you ShamPoo, because we don't have any real poo....
ReplyDeleteWV: splartiv. Seems like an appropriate new word (adj.) to describe that first wreck.
I'll take anthropomorphized anything over cakes like the first one. It's like when, as children, we made mud pies out by the barn, and... well, you know how that turned out.
ReplyDeleteWhy use shampoo when you obviously have so much of the real thing?
ReplyDeletewv: flizzyma-- I don't know what to do with that, but just thought I'd share.
ShamPOO indeed. *shudders* o_O
ReplyDeleteOh, and bonus points for the Finding Nemo reference. :D
You know what, say what you will, but I think the sham-poos are actually the closest ones to shamrock shapes. How sad is that??
ReplyDeleteWV: chedojo. Where left-wing revolutionaries go to work out.
Finding Nemo! That was a Finding Nemo reference, right? Cuz if it wasn't... then this is really embarrassing. *looks around innocently* *runs away*
ReplyDeleteYeah, it's logically hypothetical to assume one could pipe 3 simple loop shapes when they've got a plastic template right in front of them, but I guess we can just cut them some slack and say, nice try, guys! "Close enough!" (in quotation marks! Because "quotes" make things more "funner"!!!! Ever!!! Always!!! Ok, I'm getting ahead of myself here).
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, but the "anthropomorphized, lumpy-armed clover character" looks like male parts holding a dog bone!
ReplyDeleteHaha, the second picture down is from Meijer...one of the corporate-designated CCC's for St. Patty's Day. This is NOT what it's supposed to look like!
ReplyDeleteMy fave is the second to last, with the tiny plastic references all around the edge as well as right on the "clover"...AWESOME!
ReplyDeleteAnd, Jen, you gotta design a CW keyboard protector...I think a lot of your readers need one!
Cheers!
Lovely post today!
ReplyDeleteI say any piping with the round tip should be off-limits. No one seems to be able to use it right, no matter what color the frosting is. Ugh!
The first one makes me want to go to the top of Mount Wanna-hock-a-loogie. Blecht!
ReplyDeleteThe rest made me think of Gumby, peacocks, and that people just don't have a clue.
Awwwwwwww cute widdle baby elephant! :-)
wv: bodeba: Barry Manilow singing with a cold...At the bodeba, bodeba banana, the hoddest spot nord of Habana
This was a funny post, as usual, but Flartus' comment about the Shamurkey made me LOL for real!
ReplyDeletewv: gesti - I gesti baker has never seen a real shamrock before!
@MC: I was wondering the same thing. ;)
ReplyDeleteLOL gotta love when they include "unnecessary quotation marks". The one looked more like a peacock...
ReplyDeleteSome of these sham rocks look better than those cakes:
ReplyDeletehttp://fakerock.com/
Those cupcakes...
ReplyDeleteThe color...disgusting! The texture...blech. The idea of eating them...eeeeeeewwwwww!
the first one looks like what I shovel at the barn...green lumps. Eww. Just...eeew.
ReplyDeleteWV: smeire
ReplyDeleteI wish the bakers didn't smeire the frosting after seeing how cute the baby elephant is.
I was feeling depressed earlier so I logged on to Cake Wrecks and was pleasantly uplifted by the "What We Have Here is Failure to Communicate" post--best cakes EVER.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, I just saw your latest post and must admit...I feel depressed again. And sick to my tummy. I think I'll be having flashbacks of the first photo for a LONG time...it's obvious the Gerber Baby had the flu and pooped all over those cupcakes...
:p
LOL :)
wv "forking" I ain't forking eating ANY of the baby poops in that first photo!
The first one answers the question of what leprechauns do in the woods.
ReplyDeleteI'm not so sure "Lucky" is a shamrock. He looks a bit like the character from Hemp Tycoon to me. More like "Lucky that when the cops raided your place, they didn't find your crop."
Loved the Finding Nemo reference!
There's a peacock in the sham shamrocks.
ReplyDelete@ MC & Jenn
ReplyDeleteWell, might be able to kick up some of these shampoos by inferring that "Irish Spring" is the only worthwhile product to come off the Aisles.
I once found the end of the rainbow.
And saints above, there it did sit.
A huge pot of gold from the fairies.
Then I blinked and it turned into
...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean.
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.
The one strongly resembles a Peacock.
ReplyDeleteThe first picture is nauseating. Do decorators not have a picture or know what a clover looks like? I could understand if it was an intricate design of a flower, like a rose, but it's a clover. It's on the Lucky Charms box! Clovers and Pine Trees don't have an excuse to look bad.
ReplyDeleteSomeone needs to start a no'poo revolution for wreckarators! It seriously needs to stop.
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_poo
That first cake makes me nostalgic for microbiology class. Oh, the mold cultures we grew and nurtured that semester!
ReplyDeleteAnd excuse you, but that sixth cake depicts the rare and endangered brown-spotted peacock clover, found only in the dark recesses of the wreckiest of bakeries. Have some respect.
In conclusion, cute baby elephant is really, really, really, really cute.
Really almost threw up on the first cake- the FIRST CAKE!
ReplyDeleteShampo.. Now thats some funny stuff..
ReplyDeleteOh, slap your self for the anemones joke! Loved it. Love the elephant, too!
ReplyDelete"With fronds like these..." LOL My son is delighted that you've quoted his favorite band, Owl City! Kudos!
ReplyDeleteHaha, some of these are pretty gross! Can you imagine the color your tongue would turn after one bite?
ReplyDeleteOh and kudos on the R&J and the Owl City references! I greatly appreciated them!
#1 – those are mutant, um, “swimmers” from Futurama
ReplyDelete#4- W.T.F. really, if you’re not even going to try why waste the sparklie stuff sprinkled across it??
#6- looks exactly like the NBC Peacock with it’s head in the sand…guess that makes this an Ostrich?
#7- I thought it was wearing a bow tie until I realized THAT was the plastic flotsam.
#8- at least it’s a happy anemone.
-Barbara Anne
I StumbledUpon this website some time ago and it completely slipped my mind until I found it again today, and I just have to say: OMFG I didn't realize a CAKE, of all things, could be so funny. Those shamrocks were all kinds of special. Love it! Thanks for the lolz
ReplyDeleteGross!! Dare I ask why these wreckerators seem to be obsessed with turning all holiday cakes into poo catastrophes? Lol funny but also very very scary.
ReplyDeleteHaha so hilarious. thanks.
ReplyDelete#1 Saints preserve us. Do these wreckerators not look at what they've done? I know some colors change radically depending on the lighting; these must have been made during a power outage. Or a brain outage...
ReplyDelete#2 A still from 'The Gumby Workout Video'. Not to be confused with 'The Mr. Gumby Workout Video' which involves smashing bricks together and stuffing flowers upside-down into vases.
#3 What did giant chocolate chip cookies ever do to deserve the treatment they receive?
#4 looks like a model of a putting green. Sure, it's buttercream (or says so, anyway), but I can't get past the color. Or the fact of it being a CCC (patooie!).
#5 The thumbprint really makes this one -- without that, it would be so ordinary.
#6 Are people really trying to pass strange hybrid succulents off as shamrocks? I mean, really!
#7 Ah, an entry from the Irish Southwest: The endangered 'shamrock cactus'. Also known as a 'Gerber Cactus', it is delicious when deep-fried.
#8 "Lucky" on a cake is not a good sign, especially when paired with...whatever that thing is below. That 'fronds and anemones' remark is probably the best argument against stronger pun control laws yet to be put forth.
#9 Cue Henry Mancini. I am just old enough to remember when 'The Baby Elephant Walk' was popular. Oy.
Is that Mr Shuffles at the end??
ReplyDeleteDefinitely more sham than rock :D
ReplyDeleteWV: terse (yep really) - I know my comment was rather terse, but that was all I needed to say.
Om my god, I almost risked peeing my pants looking at this entry. Well done!
ReplyDeleteHave I told you lately that I love you guys? You never fail to brighten my day/make me snort with laughter so that my coworkers think i'm even crazier than they knew. All in all, its a win/win thing.
ReplyDelete"fronds" "anemones"
ReplyDeleteAre you an Owl City fan, Jen?
(If not, check out The Bird and the Worm by them. )=0)
You forgot St Urho's Day!!!! The mass Finn/American Day that is held on March 16th each year. The Finns wear purple in honor of St Urho!!! Maybe next year??
ReplyDeleteEwwwww! Cat poop cupcakes! Thanks Jen I was longing for a cupcake, ummmm I may never eat cupcakes again! Blech!!!!p.s. My diet thanks you!!!OMG! I just puked a little,gag!!!
ReplyDeleteOk the elephant baby is now my backdrop on my computer..totally made me squee!!
ReplyDeleteloved the owl city reference!
ReplyDeleteOMG OWL CITY COMMENT!
ReplyDelete'with fronds like these, well, who needs anemones?'
DADADADADADA