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Monday, February 14, 2011

The Hardest Three Words To Say

Guys, I've been wanting to say this for a while now, but...[deep breath]...well, it's just never felt like the right time, you know? And now here we are, just the two of us and the Internet, and I think...no, I KNOW...that we're finally ready to take that next step.


Ok. Here goes:


Wait. That came out wrong. I mean...


Um, that is, what I'm trying to say is...

Hang on; I've almost got it...


Yeah. Something like that.


And also:

So if you see Al, be sure to let him down easy.


Of course, declarations of love are par for the course today. Not to mention stuff like this:


And this:


And even this:



Still, when it comes to love, I think Cupid says it best:

Yeah. That's like, "whoah."


Thanks to Jared, Norma W., Christine, Sarah M., Lizzie S., Franco P., Howard P., & Michael C., who actually have no idea what Cupid said because they can't stop staring at his diaper.

Or is that just me?
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54 comments:

  1. Jules AFFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:32 AM

    When my sister-in-law was pregnant, my niece kept saying, "My new sister is going to be born on Balentimes Day." I would LOVE to find a cake that said that and buy it for her.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ShawnFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    Loves that the second one has a sell by date of 4/7/10. Ick!

    Happy Balentines Day Cake Wrecks!

    ReplyDelete
  3. laughingmomFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:39 AM

    What? No "Happy V.D.?" The STD's of the world feel neglected!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Tricia LFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:43 AM

    What I find most disturbing about #5 is that the "I (extremely oversized heart) you" was put on BEFORE they let go with the silly string. The border is on top of the "you". And you can see where they traced the heart in the icing before adding the piping ... off centered. And they couldn't figure out what to do with that random bit of pink that fell inside the heart. (head-desk)

    ReplyDelete
  5. GaryFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:45 AM

    Well, I loe you, too.
    Happy Balentine's day to Jen, John, Number One, and all the Cake Wrecks readers.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Jules ♂ ♪February 14, 2011 at 9:45 AM

    Is it that tine of the year already?

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:49 AM

    I think the person who wrote "Be By Valentine" had a cold.

    I'm surprised there's not one for Valentimes Day. You know, the holiday in the middle of Febuary.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:52 AM

    I have to post this WV: inishal

    Coming soon to a wrecked cake near you:

    Happy Birtday Jay Jay (don't write the name, just the inishals)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Lady AnneFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:55 AM

    Our youngest daughter always pronounced it ValenTIME's Day. Of course, she also had a friend named Donamick.

    ReplyDelete
  10. EllenFebruary 14, 2011 at 9:59 AM

    The "Be By Valentine" cake made this pop into my brain:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_Y6UKMp8Qw

    Bicky Bi Bo Bu! :)


    wv: yeress

    Yeress will be gress if you give one of these cakes to your sweetheart!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Michelle KrassanFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:05 AM

    Sadly, I looked at teh first one for almost a full minute before I realized why it was a wreck. It almost seemed like just a regular cake.... Then the spelling hit me!

    Doh! {in best Homer Simpson impersonation}

    ReplyDelete
  12. FormerDominatorFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:06 AM

    Um, does that last one say "Be Mines"? Because I think it does.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Fluffy CowFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:07 AM

    I tore myself away from the diaper to see the "be mines".

    sad.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:09 AM

    When I was growing up in Brooklyn (many,many decades ago,) my Dad celebrated Balentine's Day, every afternoon after work.
    I prefer Coors'

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sandy C also in SoFlaFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:12 AM

    Those "I Loe You" cakes made me say, "hu?" I mean, to misspell once, maybe. but 3x? Maybe these are for the people who just are unable to say the "L" word.

    Thank you, wreckporters, for your covert and awesome work. Too bad we cannot know the names of the stores.....

    ReplyDelete
  16. Travelin' MikeFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:50 AM

    This might be by favorite blog of the day!

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:54 AM

    I think bakers have started wrecking their displays on purpose. They must be competing to see who can get on Cake Wrecks first. -K

    ReplyDelete
  18. TisforTonyaFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:02 AM

    all these commitment-phobic wreckies need to go to therapy...

    and I'm not mentioning culinary school... because that would ruin my fun.

    ReplyDelete
  19. JasryFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:23 AM

    Also, Cupid appears to be shooting himself, as the bow is piped on backwards. Well, I guess even Cupid needs love too. And a diaper change.
    Happy St. Valentine's Day Massacre Day, y'all! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:24 AM

    Happy birthday, Gwynn Valentine!

    The fourth cake down (for "al") is more than a pound of love.

    ReplyDelete
  21. L.A.C.E.February 14, 2011 at 11:38 AM

    bahahaha!! Laughingmom someone on my FB actually put Happy VD in their status and I was so tempted to reply lol

    as for the cakes. they murdered that poor heart cookie w/ all that icing

    ReplyDelete
  22. MomcatFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:38 AM

    Cake #5: You give me heartworms?
    wv: jumsess - When he gives her chocolates, she jumsess bones!

    ReplyDelete
  23. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:53 AM

    No Happy Valentime's Day. I'm so disappointed.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Loo-E Loo-IFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:59 AM

    Cake 1: Well at least they were following the rule "I before E except after C".

    Cake 2: Yeah. "Marketfresh Quality Everyday" my a$$. Good eye Shawn!

    Cake 3: Balentine's? Is this for people that hate Valentine's day?

    Cake 4: Too bad, al.

    Cake 5: you 'heart' I. It's like a command - probably for the "Overly-possessive" Valentine.

    Cake 6: Ok, they misspelled "Love" - could've been an acronym for Lack Of Effort. Did anyone notice the "mulch" frosting? Or that they basically dumped a fruit-cup on top of the other cakes?

    Cake 7: Be By? Mix this cake with #3 and you have "talk with the letter B" day.

    Cake 8: Oh, it's the Cupid Gollum. Be mines precious!

    wv: crearier. Cupid's diaper is going up his crearier.

    ReplyDelete
  25. MeganFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:06 PM

    Pretty sure the diaper looks like it is leaking out the top. Ewwwww! :)

    ReplyDelete
  26. AmaurielFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:24 PM

    That third one (Happy Balentine) might be Japanese. They don't have the sound of V in their alphabet at all, so they replace it with B. When I was there, it took some getting used to when I heard kids say they wanted to play Bolleyball.

    It's also considered cool there to celebrate "American" holidays with English writing.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Sandy C also in SoFlaFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:27 PM

    "Cupid Gollum" I LOVE IT!! roflmho

    ReplyDelete
  28. unseeliepixieFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:35 PM

    I'm sure that next to last cookie cake was simply a case of the request being put in with someone with a severe case of congestion. Easy mistake... ;)

    ReplyDelete
  29. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:47 PM

    One has to wonder what is happening to the educational system in this country. Horrible grammar and spelling!!!! I mean who misspells love 3 times?? And "Be Mines"? It's Be Mine... learn to speak correctly people. Okay time for my coffee and chocolate before I get even more grouchy!

    ReplyDelete
  30. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 12:58 PM

    Happy Decapitated Catholic Saint Day.

    ReplyDelete
  31. CraigFebruary 14, 2011 at 1:01 PM

    #7 I could buy the 'cold' theory if it said, 'Be By Valedtide.'

    #8 Cupid stopped by the armory and upgraded to a recurve bow with pulleys. He grabbed some mines, too -- dude's getting serious. Either that, or the wreckerator was listening to Ted Nugent while working...

    ReplyDelete
  32. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 1:24 PM

    OMG, that cupid has me giggling like a nitwit at my desk, I'm so mature!

    ReplyDelete
  33. LeslieFebruary 14, 2011 at 3:12 PM

    AHAHAHA! Love it, lisagems!

    ReplyDelete
  34. AnnaFebruary 14, 2011 at 3:21 PM

    Okay that cupid one looks like a diaper thong...just saying...

    ReplyDelete
  35. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 3:49 PM

    BWAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG you crack me up. that's sooo hilarious!

    -annaliza

    ReplyDelete
  36. JenFebruary 14, 2011 at 3:50 PM

    @ Anony 11:53 - I just added a "Valentimes" wreck to the post, just for you. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  37. funny jokes funnyFebruary 14, 2011 at 4:08 PM

    life can be seriously so funny i never think

    ReplyDelete
  38. msyendorFebruary 14, 2011 at 4:17 PM

    Whoa. Cupid. front-loaded thong diaper. So wrong.

    wv: potyptsh = the sound of a certain clogged drain

    ReplyDelete
  39. RUFebruary 14, 2011 at 4:18 PM

    Nope, it's not just you.

    But it "depends" on who you ask.

    ReplyDelete
  40. GingerFebruary 14, 2011 at 5:05 PM

    Thanks for adding the "Valentime's Day" cake! Both my girls (6 and 4) insist that that's what it is -- and create their holiday cards to suit. (Future wreckerators, I'm sure.) So it's a perfect Valentime's Day here, just right for my 4-year-old's favorite dessert, chocolate chip "tookies."

    ReplyDelete
  41. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 5:35 PM

    There is a Valentime's--it's the third one down. The "al" is just a cursive I...

    ReplyDelete
  42. DonnaFebruary 14, 2011 at 5:50 PM

    Is "Loe You" short hand for "loathe you"? Just askin...

    Happy VD!!! :O)

    ReplyDelete
  43. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 6:11 PM

    I have a whisky lovin' friend who celebrates Ballentine's Day today. I did a double take when I saw his first post about it.

    ReplyDelete
  44. UnknownFebruary 14, 2011 at 6:15 PM

    Is anyone else thinking, "Vamlumtimes is serious times!"?

    ReplyDelete
  45. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 6:18 PM

    and then I misspelled Ballantine's
    http://www.whisky.com/brands/ballantines.html

    ReplyDelete
  46. AnonymousFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:02 PM

    My mother ordered a cake for my sister-in-law, Cris, at a local Safeway bakery. On the order ticket, my mother wrote, "Happy Birthday Cris!"...and then, in parentheses:(No "h"), as her name had no "h" in it. The finished cake read exactly:

    Happy Birthday Chris!
    (No "h")

    Naturally we took the cake, as is, with a smile on our face.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Keb'nFebruary 14, 2011 at 10:31 PM

    Did you know that your book was featured prominently on The Graham Norton show on BBC America this week. Kate Hudson loved it so much he gave it to her! And they showed lotsa pics.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Jennifer GrigsbyFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:21 PM

    Ah, dang. Gary beat me to it. That was the first thing I thought about the "Loe you" cakes. It felt somehow right, like a Ghostbusters 2 quote would be appropriate for this entry. Can't imagine why, though...

    wv: Calga. "Calga, take me away from these wrecks!"

    ReplyDelete
  49. MissNayFebruary 14, 2011 at 11:48 PM

    my verification word is kisfonqu which is, as we all know, an anti-kiss form of martial arts.

    ReplyDelete
  50. ArleneFebruary 15, 2011 at 12:27 AM

    At least this year no one got a happy vd heart lmao. Or herpes. But that last cake would either give someone a major sugar rush or death by laughing hysterically at that cupid. Scary and hilarious cakes.

    ReplyDelete
  51. AnonymousFebruary 15, 2011 at 6:17 AM

    Some of the cakes were cute, too bad about the misspellings

    ReplyDelete
  52. Glasgow CakesFebruary 15, 2011 at 6:33 AM

    Can't stop laughing at "Al [heart] you".

    ReplyDelete
  53. widogmomFebruary 15, 2011 at 1:18 PM

    Be By Valentine? See, I knew if Cupid kept flying around half-naked in February, he'd catch a cold.

    ReplyDelete
  54. AnonymousFebruary 15, 2011 at 2:45 PM

    Can I celebrate Balentine's Day instead of Valentine's Day?

    http://www.thecinemasource.com/moviesdb/images/Christian_Bale%20-%201%20-%20Rescue_Dawn.jpg

    :) Kyla

    ReplyDelete

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